Well said Mr Africa.. People do come here to have fun & probably wont give u meaningful advice on issues such as this.. Pls try to find out if such union is prohibited in ur religion & family laws, if you're satisfied that you aint breakin d law/rules, go straight to your cousin & tell him you're in love with his wife's sister, if he frowns at it then i guess you have to forget the relationship.

mamba:

Well said Mr Africa, People do come here to have fun & probably wont give u meaningful advice on issues such as this, Please try to find out if such union is prohibited in your religion & family laws, if you're satisfied that you aint breakin d law/rules, go straight to your cousin & tell him you're in love with his wife's sister, if he frowns at it then i guess you have to forget the relationship.

I will just say this it is not right to go for her.

Not right.

Olumide,my candid advice is that you go for the girl after your heart,but I advise it has to end in marriage otherwise it may affect your familiy relationship.You are not blood relatives and so there is no tradition,custom or religion that forbids this,if there is any,maybe I don't know yet.Make her know what's up and search your mind to know if you are ready to marry her,if you are,Go ahead if not,stay back.Marrying the woman you love and the one that loves you back is the best thing that can happen to any man.The choice is yours.Good luck.

I think u need to get that african mentality away from ur head and GO FOR IT!!!

@olamide

She's the only person that makes my heart beat faster and slower all at the same time, but still I feel our relationship will not go down well with everyone. Every time I look into her eyes, I say to myself "i'm in trouble". Because I know i'm in trouble.

which kind of trouble?

or maybe there is something im not getting. From your story, its you and your cousin that are related by blood, not you and your cousins wife sister, at least before your cousin married into that family, you were not related, so whats the problem. Getting married to relations is not culturally or even medically advisable, so for me I dont see any problem,

but please, to those who say Olumide should not go ahead, can u pls explain why? any reasons behind it, and why should families frown on such relationships,

kimba:

@olamide
which kind of trouble?

or maybe there is something im not getting. From your story, its you and your cousin that are related by blood, not you and your cousins wife sister, at least before your cousin married into that family, you were not related, so whats the problem. Getting married to relations is not culturally or even medically advisable, so for me I don't see any problem,

but please, to those who say Olumide should not go ahead, can u please explain why? any reasons behind it, and why should families frown on such relationships,

exactly

Dearie,
make sure it is what u want, tell her and be persistent !
treat her right, ok?
the most important thing is, that she also has feelings 4 u and that u dont mess up with her.
i'm sure both families will eventually be impressed when they see that u are seriously in love

ola,are u scared?are they going to kill you,you guys are not related by blood in anyway so go for her and dont kill that love.

@Olamide - As the general consensus here have stated although you're a close knit family fact is you're not related in anyway. If you are going to approach her do so in the most sensitive manner and be sure she is the one for you n yo intentons are honourable.

Nothing wrong here. You aint related by blood. You r only related by conjugation and i think u and the girl conjugating would only make the bond between d 2 families stronger.j/kidding
Sincerely, go for her. Nothing wrong in that.
Since she's a Nairaland member, we could help convince her. Lets know who she is (if u don't mind).

I love Nairalanders, we\re one big family!

u keeps digging up all this old threads?

Since 2005??
They are prolly married by now.

what does ur spirit mind tells u.well, congrat man, at least u have someone u admire.just follow ur heart

@poster,
Are there no other ladies in town
     This is what i call LUST

You can shag hell out of her but I can't advise u 2 marry her, You can look very far for your own wife

oh boy go for d babe,even blood relations dey date e come be just family friends,make i tell u,if u no go now,i trust naija guys,they too fast,they go just thief d girl korokoro for ur eyes,delay is dangerous,make haste while d sun shines before it will be too late

PurestBoy:

You can shag hell out of her but I can't advise you to marry her, You can look very far for your own wife

[size=13pt]Why should he SHAG the hell out of her and then look elsewhere for a wife? Would you like this treatment to be meted out on your sister?[/size]

Busta:

u keeps digging up all this old threads?

Since 2005??
They are prolly married by now.

[size=13pt]LOL [/size]

bros no harm in dating and eventually marrying her, i even believe it will strenghtened the bond between the two families, for as long as your are not related, you can carry go! it means that the girls family have abundant resources, but hope their is no more ladies in their family that guys in your family can date again. it is not because of your family that
god create her family o!

nothing wrong as far as u re not related by blood,GO 4 IT.

Go for d puyaya

@ poster. what is your problem. Why are you rejecting everbody's opinion and suggestions. tis either u had done it and it dint work or u think it wouldnt work. many of these opinions make sense.

if u knew from the onset (if u both knew from the onset) dis relationship was an abomination, why bother having feelings grow to this extent and for this long.

withour parental consent in any relationship tis bound to have mishaps, u need their blessings.

if u really have good intentions for dis girl u can do anything no matter what to win the consent of ur folks, but to me ur behaving like u just lusting after her. u better dont go into what u both might regret in future.

This will work if the two of pull yourself from that society for a while TO SOLIDIFY the relationship.

For instance, going to a neighboring country where neither of are around "family" and being together for a while - then returning as a "united front" - the family would possibly be more accepting as they would see you as a "couple."

Do you the luxury to be able to do this?

Or staying put and "dating" - you aren't actually blood-kin regardless to how close the families are to each other.

She sounds like she is the "insecure/unsure one".  It sounds like you would be in it for the "long haul" and would be the "rock" in that relationship.

Getting her alone for a week or two to "sell her" on the idea - look into the religion as well to gather supportive documentation.

It really would be a good relationship as you both already know ALL OF THE FAMILY so it would be good for you and her.  New relationships at times mean that you have to nurture and cultivate your mates family that you don't know.

The two of you being together have a great advantage because it deletes having to do this and you can actually focus more on each other.

Please just elope with her and let us be.

Try the door test.

If she passes, then act like Nike and just do it!

jennykadry:

oh boy go for d babe,even blood relations dey date e come be just family friends,make i tell u,if u no go now,i trust naija guys,they too fast,they go just thief d girl korokoro for your eyes,delay is dangerous,make haste while d sun shines before it will be too late

i have also found myself in this predicament,but the girl in question has traveled out of d country.but we are still contacting each other.