HungerBAD:
Make friends and be loyal to the Office Gossip, so he or she don't start stories about you.

Another one. look for those people that are very influential in the office and be friends with them. because they make or break you with gossips and hearsay

Donariok:
Agreed,u tried to b funny.
In fact, to some people it funny.



buh I'm seriously not laughing to this. not because there's no sense of humour in it. but because THIS SHIT SHOULDN'T MAKE FP.



these er some of d reasons some lil kid can just jump in here, and start saying trash!

CONCLUSION : ADMIN OF THIS SITE SHOULD GROW UP.
OP GROW UP ALSO

and where is ya own site? atole. Don't go and find work . Stay there and run ya big mouth

Highest service.

FriedPlantain:
If you are gonna do any of this tricks the least you can do is to ensure you do not get caught in the act.
That was how I intentionally stayed late at the office one day at staring and drooling at fresh _nude pictures of Maheeda's boobs oblivious of the fact the MD had quietly entered my office and was directly at my back.

You guys do not want to know what happened after that.

Friedplantain

My drooling to know the details.

He joined you Abi? Ashawo men

captainobvious you are Hilarious!
The sigh, the messy desk, frown and paper carrying
And that number 10? Epic!

@op, why are you blowing out these precious secrets ?

Anyway, im my own boss now but these.
I faithfully practiced all these and more back in the days. It works o!

so this is wat this mumu boy does at work abi....




i don catch hin tricks

jossi994:
and where is ya own site? atole. Don't go and find work . Stay there and run ya big mouth

u don't expect me to start exchanging words wid u because ur comment shows u one ov those kids DAT rant dia mouth on social media. #u need sense

Ekpo ooooh! http://www.bummyla.com

[quote author=captainobvious post=37747089]Are you having a hard time making the right impression at work? Do you need to get ahead at work? Well, I have just the right advise for you! Follow these funny, yet indisputably useful office pointers and you will soon see results.

Please note, these office rules are funny and not to be taken too seriously. Enjoy!

1. Always look irritated, impatient and annoyed

Do you want to avoid being hassled by co-workers or management? Always try to maintain an irritated or annoyed expression on your face throughout the day. Act as though you are on a deadline and cannot afford to be disturbed. This implies you are busy and in the middle of something important (even if you’re not!)

2. Walk with purpose!

Never, ever walk casually from one office or desk to the other – this just looks like you are slacking off work. You need to look purposeful so others believe you have reason to get up and move away from your desk. In reality, you could just be off to CHAT with your colleague, but if you walk there like you mean it, people will never suspect!

3. Keep your desk messy

Have you not heard that messy is the new busy? Top management can get away with a clean desk. For the rest of us, it looks like we’re not working hard enough. Therefore, stack your table high, even if you are a neat freak at home, trust me, you’ll need a messy desk at work. A messy desk simply shows you have work piled up to your eyeballs and are flooded with tasks to get through; therefore no-one will want to bother you!

4. Type on your computer whenever someone walks by

Even if you are researching something important or just staring at the screen of the PC, unless you are typing away furiously at your keyboard, it won’t look like you are actually working! Type and look engrossed in what you are doing. (Just don’t draw too much attention!)

5. Always carry one or two documents around with you

This is a renowned tactic to having that look of a hard worker. For all your colleagues know, you could be carrying around blank papers! Remember, walk briskly, with an irritated look on your face, and carry a few DOCUMENTSwith you, and you will most definitely look the part!

6. Smile at the boss, always

Irrespective of how miffed you are at the boss, always give him or her a smile and a nod of the head. This shows a level of respect (even if you are cursing them under your breath!)

7. Send emails at unearthly hours

Do you want to create the impression that you are a workaholic and that you take your job seriously? Simple! Just set your alarm at home for some insane hour, get up, email work with something (anything work related in fact), and bingo – you look like you have been up all night slaving away at work projects whilst everyone else is fast asleep in bed!

8. Never leave the office on time

You should try to leave the office at least 10 minutes after you’re ‘allowed’ to leave. This shows that you are not running out the door soon as the clock strikes 5pm!

9. Creative Sighing for Effect

Sigh loudly when there are many people around, giving the impression that you are under extreme pressure.

10. Have 2 Jackets

If you work in a big open spaced office, and you want to dash somewhere, always leave a spare jacket draped over the back of your seat. This gives the impression that you are still on the premises. The second jacket should be worn while having fun elsewhere.

https://blog.ngcareers.com/4878/10-hilarious-but-real-office-rules-to-live-by/

That's what happens when u av a job and not a career, there's difference between a career and a job!

HYPOCRISY BECOMES A VIRTUE AND WORK ETHICS

Number one is straight outta seinfeld..
George constanza invented tht

Donariok:

u don't expect me to start exchanging words wid u because ur comment shows u one ov those kids DAT rant dia mouth on social media. #u need sense

foolish fool. Stop running your mouth here and go tend to that wack ass site of yours. Ode

jossi994:
foolish fool. Stop running your mouth here and go tend to that wack ass site of yours. Ode

Fools don't always agree dey er fools esp wen dey keeps fooling themselves.... #idiot

Donariok:
Fools don't always agree dey er fools esp wen dey keeps fooling themselves.... #idiot

and bunkums like you don't have any common sense to know how stupid they are. Ignoramus of the 1st order. Ewu mpama

Nice tricks, I was almost sent ck home on my 1st day in a new office for just sitting doing nothing after finishing my job

that no 10 na wa o, lol

You had better check www.careerlinko.com for more info.

Hun! this could work, but not in every other places.
and faithfulness does not require pretense. If you do, you do. If you don't, you don't.

Government jobs are much sought after in India for one main reason - Security.
Although it might sound like a bad thing (which in fact it is), in old days, Indian parents who went for arranged marriages (which was a common thing back then) always chose to select their kid's spouses based on whether or not they had a Government job. Please don't mis understand though - that private jobs were bad. In fact, private jobs had better salaries and better earning potential. But job security was a concern. Government jobs, even though paid less, had perks like Provident Fund, job security get latet updates at http://www.govtjobsclub.in/freejobalert/

latest employment news today updates available daily based on jobs information in India. http://www.careerpratibha.com

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good piece of information here. candidates who are looking for employment news in Inda visit this url regarding lateset government jobs information India. http://www.careerbhavitha.com/employment-news-this-week/

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I am considering sacking Someone based on that.

Actually, the feeling l get each time l run into her and she's all squeezed up, is that the task is too difficult for her to manage. In addition to that,
eye service too much.

misspicy:
Nice points but that number one is rather too harsh.....we dont wanna come as an always angry person,not good for office personality besides some people like me have naturally smiling face.

I am considering sacking Someone based on that.

Actually, the feeling l get each time l run into her and she's all squeezed up, is that the task is too difficult for her to manage. In addition to that,
eye service too much.

I can't deal Biko!

misspicy:
Nice points but that number one is rather too harsh.....we dont wanna come as an always angry person,not good for office personality besides some people like me have naturally smiling face.

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