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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I Can't Bear The Agony (1059 Views)
Married Woman Wants Me To Bear Her First Child / The Agony Of A Nigerian Fat Girl / I Can't Bear The Agony (2) (3) (4)
I Can't Bear The Agony by OnyinyeGod(f): 1:41pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
I am a girl of 22 yrs, and in love with a guy. We have been in this relationship for over 5 yrs now and our family members knew about it. He was the one that taught me what love really is. I love him so much and he love me too. He is not rich neither is his family but despite all these, i can't love anyother person other than him, i gave him my whole heart, soul and body. It got to an extent that when he comes back home (because he is living in the north) and his transport money finishes, i will beg my parents to give me money that i want to do something or sometimes, i will do some menial job to get some money for his transport fare back to Kaduna. This guy pregnanted my best friend and he later came back and ask for forgiveness, i forgave him wholeheartedly because the girl refused that he will not marry her because of me. I took it as a temptation and forgave him. I gave this guy my heart, everything there is nothing left. If i woke up from sleep, the first thing that will come up from my mind, is how is Christopher doing now? Has he woken up? Has he eaten? He is no 1 in my life. Men were coming, asking my hand in marriage to the extent that his immediate elder brother keep on asking me to marry him. Since i can't love then neither can i like them, i will tell then that i am engaged despite that this guy has not propose. Our problem started last month, he called me one sunday afternoon and ask me where i am, and the person i am with(Thats his usual attitude). With all sincerity, i told him am at our house and am with our landlord's son talking with him. He got angry and ask me why i will be with him, what is he doing with me. He started raining abuses on me saying that he can see that i have boyfriend here while he is there starving himself, that from that day that he is going to get for himself another girl. Since then, i have been begging him and asking him to give me chance to explain things to him that there is nothing going on between me and the boy. He said that he does not want to hear anything that i have been cheating on him all these while. Since then i have been trying to make him understand that he is the only person that have stolen my heart. What he told me is that if i call him another day, that he is going to give his new girlfriend his phone to talk with me. please can you imagine the pain? He has gone ahead to tell my elder brother that he is not interested again that he has gotten a girl that he would marry. A guy i have dated for good six years. I can't omagine myself loosing him to another girl. I love him so much, that i cried everytime i remembered what i have passed trhough because of him. He doesn't call me anymore, i can't love anyone else, each time i remembered him, i cried like a baby. Should i keep on asking him to come back, if no what will i do to get over all this mess? i.e. forget him and forget him forever. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by amebono11: 1:44pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
well you have to move on, he had d girl already b4 the misunderstanding, dat was just an excuse |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by amebono11: 1:49pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
first off the guy is 26, second off u said uve been dating for 6 yrs now and said in some other thread dat uve been on for 4 years, from 21 to 22, abi ur borthday don reach? nairaland and their complicated story sha ![]() ![]() OnyinyeGod: OnyinyeGod: |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by bblacky(f): 1:58pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
,amebo no1: yea n because he did nt knw how to break d news directly to u dat he is opting out f the rl8tnsp he has to use dat lil opportunity u gave him to quit. i can feel how painful it is to loose a dear one lik urs, despite wat u mght hav gon thru to keep it goin, but u dont have to n i wont advice u either to continue crying for him or even beggin him, carry on ur life let him n his newly found wife to be cntinue d rest of his life. as a young n beautifl lady u are, there are guys n able to do men out there ready to pick u up n dust out the dirt off u. cheer up n be confident pray to God 4 d courage to bear this. Good luck |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Nobody: 1:59pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
thread starter, you good for nothing boy friend is a waste pipe. my 2kobo advice is dump his cheating arrogant corny a55 like a piece of rubbish. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by izeek(m): 2:05pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
he had some1 else b4 all the trouble. just wanted an excuse to end it thats all. well u have to move on, and let him be in ur past. even if u want him back, dont be too desperate about it. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by ebila(m): 2:10pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
@Poster, How long has ur boyfriend been 'tripping'?If it's been for more than 2,3 months,then girlfriend,u just gasto move on.Possibilities r that he was tired of the relationship but didn't wanna hurt u by callin' it off so he was lookin' for an excuse,which finally came. don't keep thinkin' u can't do without him,cos u'll be doin' urself more harm than good.U r what u r,u can do whaever u wanna do.U love him,i understand,but sometimes,things happen for more better things to happen.If he loves a s much as u love him,beliv me,he'll want to know why u hurt him(then realise he was only bein' paranoid).Just take it easy k? |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Emperoh(m): 2:23pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Na wetin dey do una. . . . . u go carry every go dash one guy wey u neva marry If he begins to misbehave, you will start asking what you did right. . . . . if you dey love, save some part of ya life so that when he begins to misbehave, whoop his arse and move on!! |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by ebila(m): 2:25pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
@seun, What i was implyin' was he didn't want d break up speech to come out from him,so he needed an excuse. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by dae(f): 2:25pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Simple Advice --- Not worth it, the fact that he got ur friend pregnant is even enough reason. As ur first dude,the obsession is gon be like this, but girl, trust me, you need to free yourself, liberate yourself. Hang out with other dudes, i'm sure u'll find someone who has better things to offer and not someone who'll get another woman pregnant again! FREE YOURSELFFFFFF!!!! |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by sistawoman: 2:39pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Read what I wrote to Diva1 on this thread: https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-246999.224.html It also applies to you. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by OnyinyeGod(f): 4:14pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
OnyinyeGod: |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by erady(f): 5:32pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Why would u put all ur heart on a guy, wen u no dat he can hurt u at anytime?. to be sincere i think u would ve seen the sign coming but ur luv 4 him was too strong dat u can't leave him even wen he impregnated ur GF. babygirl u screwed things up urself. Plz stop thinking abt him nd move on wit ur life ![]() |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by topup: 8:51pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Ask him to hear you out, ONE LAST TIME for your conscience, and if he is still adamant that he cannot trust you and that he has taken another girl as his 'prized possession' then I'm afraid, I'll be the first to say CONGRATULATIONS. I don't know 'Christopher' but there are bad and mixed messages coming from this guy, it seems it's a combination of a great deal of insecurity and lack of trust, self control and honesty from his side. Those are not traits worthy of marriage, to a loving, wonderful woman as yourself. Please continue to cry, let the pain and agony be released from your heart, don't hold back thinking that he'll return - please he had a diamond but keeps scratching it and rubbing it the wrong way. Well, you'll never be dull in my eyes. Okay, I guess maybe this story is one sided, or maybe you've been completely honest, if so, I can see RED ALERT signs all over this relationship. Cheating is a strike, a very serious one, and if he can easily be tempted by your best friend of all people then who's to say he won't be tempted by your sister, your mother, cousin, niece or God forbid, your daughter. I am not saying he's a monster but he's not serious about you, well not as much as you are about him. My suspicions tell me that maybe he cheated on you a second time and the guilt is what was affecting him, also self-doubt has caused him to resent you, because maybe he feels that he doesn't deserve you and found any excuse for a breakup or maybe he believes that: such a loyal woman doesn't exist and that maybe you're lying to him, or maybe you're playing a smarter game. I'll write more later, but my honest suggestion is that you escaped being united with a reckless person. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by C2H5OH(f): 8:57pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
For the life of me I can't understand why you girls continue dying for dudes that treat you like shit. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Bossman(m): 9:07pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
You need to move on. This stupid guy you call your boyfriend and that you love so much, already had a girlfriend, and he was looking for a way to tell you. Once he found an opportunity, he let the bomb out and made it seem like you are the one at wrong. You do not need a guy like this in your life. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by C2H5OH(f): 9:09pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
Bossman:Imagine the nerve. He has her wrapped around his finger. She needs to get a life of our own. You see that's what happens when one person is too dependent on the other in a relationship. Big time disaster. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Hesperus(m): 9:28pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
@ Poster, first of all, I have to tell you that this your situation get as e be. Your boyfriend of over 5 years impregnated your best friend, and his elder brother is asking you to marry him. Men! You are surrounded by weirdos. My advice to you is, break it up with your so-called boyfriend and cut off contact with them all. You are still young and more men will come. The way I see it, if you guys stay together, past events will always haunt you. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Nobody: 9:50pm On Jun 03, 2009 |
The guy dey feel important. Leave his sorry arse. When he discovers that what he had is worth dying for he will come begging. He knows he's got you strong into loving and dying for him. Now he capitalises on this fact and hurts you with it instead, while looking for excuses to legalise his promiscuity. Dont cry for him.You lost something that isnt worht much while you worth more than Gold. But of course love is blind and even deaf and you wont see neither will you listen. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Anamelechi: 1:13pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
My dear move on with your life. He don' deserve you. I once had a gay whom i loved so much, almost everybody in school then, his family members and all his friends knew about us. All the properties my brother bought for me i gave them to him, i once used my school fees for his treatment when he was very sick but three months after his illness, i caught him having sex with a girl he introduced to me as his sister. I moved on with my life. Now i am happily married he wants us to friends again which is not possible. So, i urge you to forget about him, i believe you will meet a gay who will love and care for you. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by biola44: 1:21pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
its time 2 let go! ![]() |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by KINGSOLALA: 1:42pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
My sister , the guy is tired of the relationship and looking for an excuse to quit. What u wil do is to stop calling and begging him . Gather urself together , If you are a christain , pray about it and look very well before entering another relationship. MOST IMPORTANTLY SIX YEARS IS TOO MUCH FOR A RELATIONSHIP THAT WILL YEILD POSITIVE RESULT[. ![]() |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by IFELEKE(m): 1:57pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
@Poster At 22, you've got your life ahead of you.So, why waste it on a trivial being? Let go and Move on. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by OnyinyeGod(f): 5:29pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
THANKS TO U ALL FOR UR REASONABLE RESPONSE. I WILL TRY TO STOP CALLING AND BEGGING HIM TOO. I PRAY THAT GOD WILL GIVE ME THE HEART AND COURAGE TO CARRY ON WITH MY LIFE. MAY MY JESUS RICHLY BLESS U ALL. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by patwhizkid(f): 5:33pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
Amen! |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by oleigh(m): 7:52pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
my lady,abeg make you no kill urself bcoz of one guy ooo,just take your time as God go do your own 4 you,just leave the stupid guy 4 God he will surely judge him. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Nobody: 8:04pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
LIFE GOES ON! I FEEL U!!! SORRY OOO!!! ![]() |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Diva1(f): 8:09pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
Sorry for you. I feel you. I have been there so i can understand where you are coming from. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by IykeD(m): 10:54pm On Jun 04, 2009 |
He doesn't deserve you sis, try and move on with your life. |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by Outstrip(f): 1:51am On Jun 05, 2009 |
So you started dating him at 17 and he is more than likely your first. That explains why you are acting like you will die if he does not come back. You seriously need to move on. He is getting off on you begging him. Even if he comes back do not take him back. Respect yourself and move on with your life. You deserve better |
Re: I Can't Bear The Agony by tpiah: 5:52am On Jun 05, 2009 |
Men dey enjoy sha! |
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