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BY OYEDEJI LUQMAN ADEWALE
Aka walyntinho
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Mr Kolawole was used to be a village teacher given mearge payment of 65 thousand Naira on a monthly basis, a salary that could barely rescue his lovely family from the daring claws of hunger, not to talk of doing other things. Teachers' benefits come alive in heaven is the major societal axiom popular in the community of teachers to console their pathetic adventure in the wilderness of teaching. Monkey de work, Baboon de chop scenario.

It is not that Mr Kolawole never dreamt of erecting money-consuming and efforts-accumulating mansions to prove to the world of his own existence but the infinitesimal allowance has exchanged this glamorous dream for an enforced contentment and lingering repression thereby throwing him to the darkest corner of the world.

He now kowtow to the government's wish showing mendacious obedience to a known enemy --- government. He worked for ten years and all he could afford was a single room and parlour for his beautiful family of 6. Gentlemen and ladies, Mr Kolawole was only successful at being a failure in the society's definition of success.

Behold countrymen, this man is now a member of the National House of Assembly and his third five-star hotel was just commissioned this last Tuesday in that awesome occasion where poverty itself assumed a rearview position to observe things because of the fear to stare at the honourables in the house. Mr Kolawole, after some months in the House, is now super rich in my modest conclusion.

Mr Aribisala was known to be a quack optamologist who nearly was a graduate in the odd company of stark withdrawals in the university. The continuous skipping of meals caused by unavailability or inadequacy of foodstuffs has sifted the necessary ingredients responsible for human growth in his body, thus shrunk his gloomy stature. He could be perfectly compared to a prayer warrior undergoing lengthy fast called biribiri.

Sirs and Mas, Mr Aribi, for short, was notably emaciated not only in memory but also his body size. The poor man could faintly afford an already-used 504 because of his financial kwashiokor, he nearly drew a when-one-finishes-one-begins time table for his three children's university education. The man's stature was basically enough to point accusing fingers to Orunmila alleging disequilibrium in sharing wealth, a source of comfort. His wife almost impounded by a financially better fit man than him but for Baba Loke's intervention.

My people, Mr Aribisala is now a member of the Senate and just last month, he reawakened the Methuselaic death of his mother's wake keep with opulent display of material possessions in a manner that shows blunt extravagance, the helpless man was giving what he called "child food" (Ounje omo) to a dead mother in a posthumous merrymaking.

This, he did from collective treasury, public property. This is provocative and worrisome!! This stupid man is now also a Muhammad Ali, and others alike, of the NASS, throwing heavy blow at any obstacle that purposes to check his looting urge. Gluttons!!!

Although we all know Mrs Bokobay'ada to be a popular termagant of unequal belegerence, she was a famous political juggernaut, mama ita of unrivalled shenanigan, whose notable performance in editing election results scares even Card Readers itself. She has now been catapulted into the House of Assembly to equally make laws as a token of generosity to her in honouring her termagancy. Her actions on the national television recently did not come as a surprise to many who are familiar with her routine of one-blow-seven-die to settle anything beyond her words' bank or pea brain. What a pity!!!!

Be told that it is no more "show me your friends and I will tell you who you are" as a scripture proclaims, no blasphemy intended, it is now "show me your friends and I will tell you where you are going". Fellas, where are we going with this choice of kleptomaniac representatives whose urge to sink the CHANGE boat that the plebeians strive to build is second to none on the poor altar of selfish interest and personal aggrandizement?

Ladies and Gentlemen, these political Mayweathers are all now in the NASS "elected" to champion the interest of the voiceless crowd, the hapless masses. But in pure disregard for our efforts and energy expended at the polls where we endured long queues to make our votes count, they have been exchanging blows like exchanging sanitary pads, throwing heavy weights at the distribution of wardrobe allowance as if fighting for youth empowerment and coveting the positions of authority as if four years is one millennium.

If the tragedy of operating that expensive system of bicameral legislature in the country where 90% of the population lives below a SINGLE dollar per day is not pathetic enough, will voting mentally demented fellows into the corridors of power to represent, govern, chairman and coordinate not crash our chances of progressing as a nation? Will it not crumble our forefathers' efforts of ONE Nigeria when the milk of our treasury is sucked dry? Will it not elongate our stay in the infernal circle of stagnancy when chauvinism is the order of the day? And finally, will it not spell doom for our unborn innocent children when no notable sacrifice is made to buy them glittering future?

Ingrates who rode to power by banking on PMB's popularity, ordinary men who quickly forgot their background in poverty arena, power drunks who begged for an average man's mandate are now intoxicated for zipping half bottle of power toxic in just months of ascending 'dinner' table of national 'super'. The last time I checked the meaning of spasmodic dementia from encyclopaedia dictionary of English, what they demonstrated in NASS recently is a perfect correlation...