Originalsly:
Bro....you both live in Lagos...but yet you can't see each other for months because of schooling? So how can we help if you wouldn't be seeing her for the next few months? No need for all this drama. To the heart of the matter..... it seems that you are really looking for a quick fix so she can overcome her fears and allow you to smash her. If you don't have the patience nor the understanding of the depth of the problem it is better you leave her alone... yes... abandon her in her time of need. Why?.... because I can see you losing patience and forcing her to have sex and that would be the end of her....most common end being suicide. If you want to be a man...and really love her like your mouth is saying then you need to be with her through this the darkest period of her life. She has confided in you only...you cannot betray her trust. What she can't bring herself to tell you is that she was raped. In the dark forest you really think the guy's would care if she is on her period or not?... guys that sip blood like wine? Think about this.... she is a virgin... just like you are a virgin in terms of anal sex....a guy never jumped on your back... should a bunch of guys rape you... how would you feel?...who would you tell?.. how long would it take to forget about the experience? She, a virgin being raped and life threatened with spiritual consequences is in ten times worse a situation than you can ever imagine. Like someone said before... read up on the trauma caused by rape and how best to speed up the healing process. For now, I advise that you do not ever try to make any physical contact with her....let her initiate the contact and keep it at her level....meaning if she manages to hold your hands... don't be trying to massage her legs in return... just hold her hands in return.. when she looses then you loose as well. Don't ever think in her life she would one day forget about it...it would eventually be at the back of her mind but can be resurrected in a flash should you do something to trigger her memory. Be gentle, be verrrryyyy patient but most of all be understanding of her plight.

Omotaday:
i hope you have gotten all the advises you want but you also need to look at it from different direction. You said the girl is a virgin, how about if the girl has been defiled by someone while you are away and she is trying not to let you find out about this by acting like that everytime.

delpee:
Please take her to Mirabel Centre which is being managed by an NGO that counsels and helps rape victims. She can also follow them on Facebook.

I empathise with you both. Perfect healing is her portion by God's grace.

Orikinla:
OP or whoever you are, you are not a good boyfriend or whatever you claim to be.
She had a terrible nightmarish experience in the hands of cultists and thank God for saving her life, but she must still be traumatic. And instead of taking her for treatment at a proven psychotherapist or even take her to a proven man of God like Pastor Enoch Adejare Adeboye, you wanted to kiss and smooch her when even a dummy could see that she was still suffering from the trauma and fear for her life, because she must have recognized the cultists, but too afraid to report them to the school authorities or police.

Orikinla:
OP or whoever you are, you are not a good boyfriend or whatever you claim to be.
She had a terrible nightmarish experience in the hands of cultists and thank God for saving her life, but she must still be traumatic. And instead of taking her for treatment at a proven psychotherapist or even take her to a proven man of God like Pastor Enoch Adejare Adeboye, you wanted to kiss and smooch her when even a dummy could see that she was still suffering from the trauma and fear for her life, because she must have recognized the cultists, but too afraid to report them to the school authorities or police.

YourMain:


Ehm no don't. Be annoyingly close to her. Right now all she thinks of is the attack. She can smell the men. She can see them in her memories. She can feel them crawling up on her skin. Everything is 10 times worse in her memory. The flashbacks are horrible. Suffocating.

When you're there you can distract her. Even if it's the smallest thing. Make her laugh. Watch a movie. So she doesn't have to think about it.

dahmie2013:
Na wa o Op! Sumone went thru all dat, instead of u 2 try&help her thru these difficult times, u're busy worried abt how cant kiss or touch her.
All this generatn thinks abt is sex. Its a pity.

MRBrownJ:


and you are still here wasting time on NL, instead of making sure she never return to this evil place?!

RHEMAA:

How long will i have time for these? I wish I could. she schools in Anambra state, I school in Benin. she is to resume on the 4th and we will part ways again for another çouple of moths. thanks for everything . Yourmain

RexKexMilann:
At This Point, You've Got to Put up with Her "Odd Demeanors" Because She's Gone Through Hell, literally.


All She needs Now is AFFECTION, Be By her Side AT ALL TIMES.


I still Suggest You Look For a Renowned Psychologist OR better Still, If You are a CHRISTIAN, Let GOD know about It.

Am sorry Bro, I don't Really know Much about "Issues" Like this.

RHEMAA:

I trust her.

RHEMAA:

bro, I don't know any psychologist, How do I start? I am so worried because, with the way she shivered and said I should not touch her, it really made me worried.

Chicagoesontop:
My Brother Forget ... Your Girl Never Tell You The Truth, She Was Raped And She Doesn't Want You To Find Out, At Least Not Now Because You Love Her More Than She Loves You, Very Soon You Go Hear Say She Don Dey Move With The Leader Of The Cult Cos That's Where She Is Channelizing Her Feelings Now, You Never Sex Her Before So She Won't Get Much Feelings For You, Na The Guy (leader of the cult ) Wey Don Hammer Her Even In The Most Inconvenient Way She Dey Always Remember Anytime You Near Her.

I Don See Some Girls Wey Later Fall In love With Armed Robbers Wey Rape Them During Operations !! YOU NEVER KNOW WITH WOMEN ...

RHEMAA:

Sir, she schools in Anambra while I school in Benin. we don't see for months sometimes. just on holiday period and festive seasons.
I just pray heaven will have intervene in this issue. cultists are really disturbing her in school. one said he must bed her by hook or by crook.

RHEMAA:

thank you. We both stay in Lagos. do you know any
psychologist? help.

greggng:


There is a lady that anchors a show called labi show on tvc late night fridays I will search for her email and u can write her she always bring psycologist on her programs. She will help

All your comments are amazing, I learn quite a lot from you. Thumbs up
[size=4pt]I secretly stalk [/size]

Decker:
First of all, my heart goes out to your girlfriend. I thank God she wasn't raped and she made it out alive.

What your girlfriend is going through is a post traumatic psychological response to what she suffered. The problem is not with you, she'd definitely react the same way to any guy who tries to touch her.

Most times, the aftermath of a rape encounter deals a hard blow on the mind and general psychology of women. It's understandable. But what you should do is give her some space, and by that I mean; don't try to engage her in any sexual activity, for now. Let her emotional and psychological wounds heal first. It might take time to heal, and you have to be patient. Don't rush her into anything now.

I would also advice that you see a psychologist that would guide her through this tough process and time in her life. She also needs you to be there by her side, so, in trying to give her space, and letting her wounds heal, don't stray too far, still always endeavor to be by her side. Let her know that you are always there to protect her no matter what. Give her that assurance and try to make her feel happy and secure always, and hopefully, with time, she will come through.

You could also advice her to peruse through the web, there are definitely websites or forums that deal specifically with people that have passed through similar rape cases. She can spend some time on these sites, read people's own experiences and how they handled theirs and maybe conversing with them. This could also help in speeding up the healing process.

marieolae:
All your comments are amazing, I learn quite a lot from you. Thumbs up
[size=4pt]I secretly stalk [/size]

Vikky014:
This is quite disturbing... hw can sme1 threaten to bed a girl and she will keep mute bc they r cultist if am the one i must report to the sch authority with evidence of the threat. besides tell her not to b moving alone at nights in sch. if she is nt in sch hostel she shld try and enter sch hostel

Nomandsland:
I am really sorry 4 ur gf .. may Allah give her peace and heal her soul! Ameen ...
Tell us, where are her parents, do they know what happend? Does she have sisters around while ur far away? ...
I mean as i understood she is facing those guys everyday at school not? How can she go over it??

I really pray for her ...

coolneger:
.

Are u on twitter? go follow @LekeAlder, or his website where such case are treated visit jacknjilive.com/therapy where u can book for free therapy, counselling,and it's confidential they have couple of certified psychologist trained in such cases.

Am sure that will help.Abt d cultist,she can involv d sch authorities.Above all keep her in ur prayers,God can heal and break any blood covenant they might have made by licking her blood.Wishing u guys d very best.#AllizWell.Cheers

Decker:


Wow, I am quite elated to hear this from you. Thanks.

RHEMAA:

I have drummed that into her ears. even before that incident where those guys molested her, My spirit was troubled to call her that night, i picked my phone and called her around 9.pm. I asked where she was, she told me at a friend's place. then I told her to start going home. It was some minutes pass 9 that it happened on her way home.
cultism is so rife in her school. cultists are disturbing her. she always warn me not to come see her in school in order not to endanger my life, and that the cultists could kill me.