Utaroz:

I recall an embarassing incident when an aunt visited with her 6 month old baby. My step brother was barely a year and not quite weaned on beast milk yet. Both women were busy breastfeeding the kids at one time when it was suddenly discovered that Alice was having trouble controlling Sammy (my step brother). The struggle went on in silence untill in a frustrated gesture, Alice sat the kid down on the couch with an unceremonious  thud.
Everyone was aghast at the treatment meted out to (the now wailing) Sammy. When asked why she took such drastic measures on a poor sweet and innocent child, she ignored all of us, It was then we noticed Sammy gesticulating with little fingers toward the apparently heavier & well rounded boobs of my aunt.

When the nickel dropped, some coughed in embarassment, while others did their best to control their laughter. Alice' busts were small but no-one expected a one year old to make such a comparison!

LOL

Can still remember those days we were kids, our lastborn saw a Volks wagen beettles running at high speed, Am sure he was amazed at the speed this little beettles was going,
And he goes omg!! brother can u see how speed this small car is running, even over taking the big cars.
only God know how fast is gonna run when it grows up, lol
Omg we didnt stop making joke of him with this, even as he grows up

One day i was going to church with me niece and I gave her 2 monies,One for church offering and the other money for her biscuit.However as we were getting closer to the church gate one of her monies fell inside the pit(sewage),then i quickly encourage her to keep the remaining  money for God.She had this worrisome look on her face,then after a moment she said thus:"Uncle,but the Pastor always says that GOD is everywhere therefore let GOD go inside the gutter(sewage) and collect his money 'cos this one(pointing at the remainin money in her hand) is for my biscuit".
I was shocked!!

My son after watching our wedding pictures he asked my wife, mum everybody in this picture is laughing but why is daddy cring

Question: What's your father's name?

Answer:Daddy

koolchicco:

One day i was going to church with me niece and I gave her 2 monies,One for church offering and the other money for her biscuit.However as we were getting closer to the church gate one of her monies fell inside the pit(sewage),then i quickly encourage her to keep the remaining  money for God.She had this worrisome look on her face,then after a moment she said thus:"Uncle,but the Pastor always says that GOD is everywhere therefore let GOD go inside the gutter(sewage) and collect his money 'cos this one(pointing at the remainin money in her hand) is for my biscuit".
I was shocked!!

father2father4eva:

My son after watching our wedding pictures he asked my wife, mum everybody in this picture is laughing but why is daddy cring

you think that[b] is embarassing, i was in a bus with my nephew, one white pikin starts crying people were like aww, then another baby starts crying when she sees the first baby crying people were like aww, so maybe my nephew doesnt wants to feel left out he starts crying too but that day he sounds like a goat cryning screaming baa baa baa baa and people were having confused-worry faces i was soo embarssed[/b]

Hehe, my mum is always talking of some funny thing my elder sister did when she was young, say about 5 or 6 years old.
there was a neigbours wife they used to call amebo in secret because, well it was an open secret that she is. . .amebo.
So my mum had slaughtered a goat cos it was festve season and in the usual manner, sent out some pieces to the few women that live around, so she sent my little sister to give this woman her share. On getting there, she started saying, "Amebo, my mama say make i give you. . ."  before she was silenced by a hot slap. . . and she ran back home crying. Still a big joke in our family today.

and this time, i was talking to my little cousin in the US and jokingly, i asked her if she has a boy friend. She was 4 years old then. She looked away shyly and i was still wondering if i should have asked that question at all, till she sheilded her face with her palm so the dad wont see her, slowly turned her face towards me and nodded slowly. . .

r_o_b_b_y:

Hehe, my mum is always talking of some funny thing my elder sister did when she was young, say about 5 or 6 years old.
there was a neigbours wife they used to call amebo in secret because, well it was an open secret that she is. . .amebo.
So my mum had slaughtered a goat cos it was festve season and in the usual manner, sent out some pieces to the few women that live around, so she sent my little sister to give this woman her share. On getting there, she started saying, "Amebo, my mama say make i give you. . ."  before she was silenced by a hot slap. . . and she ran back home crying. Still a big joke in our family today.

LWKMD!!!!

maxtop:

, funny enough my kid has not started talking.

Good for you

@Posters
You guys crack me
All ya who posted rock

Donvilo:

"Uncle, why is your teeth big? Oh my God! What an embarrassment!

OMG !!! So funny! Lol!

Jarus:


@skillworks , I want to believe that is a fabrication.

@topic
My 3 year old nephew came to holiday wt us a couple of months ago. He now entered grandma's room one night when there was no light and found grandma changing, at d point wia her cloth covered her face. he just screamed and ran bak to sitting room, claiming he saw ojuju. Grandma came out to tell her she was d one he saw, but to no avail. The boy refused to enter dat room in 4 days and insisting there was ojuju in grandma's room. All efforts by everyone to convince him proved    abortive. I even told him ojuju is just imaginary but he refused to listen to everyone

father2father4eva:

My son after watching our wedding pictures he asked my wife, mum everybody in this picture is laughing but why is daddy cring

daddy dey wowo or hunger done stack his face down
i joke

Kids can be very Funny,  My Uncle told me one day that we make him laff wen me and my friend were kid @ 6 (i dont believe him sha)
He told me that he was at the living room watching Tv, when me and my friend came back from sch and he forced us to do our Assignment. He leave us and went back to the tv he was watching. The Convo goes like this between me and my friend.

Me: Dont do the Assignment can't u see its hard
My Friend: (He touched the table whr we placed our book) and he say it's hard truely!

these little kids are funny
When my little nephew was small the dad taught him how to switch on the Television and other gadgets. Sometimes he may say Daniel go and swithch on the TV. The boy always ask 'I should on it'?
One day I bought buscuit for him, after trying his best to unwrap it without success, he came back to me and said uncle please on it for me. I asked him what he mean, he said please on the biscuit for me.

Ejike3:

these little kids are funny
When my little nephew was small the dad taught him how to switch on the Television and other gadgets. Sometimes he may say Daniel go and swithch on the TV. The boy always ask 'I should on it'?
One day I bought buscuit for him, after trying his best to unwrap it without success, he came back to me and said uncle please on it for me. I asked him what he mean, he said please on the biscuit for me.

why u sef nor on na now

Don't mind children, he thought everything is electronics.

I was trying out fun ways to teach me three year old how to count. Over a meal of rice and plantain, the following dialougue took place

Daddy: Deolu, lets count the pieces of "dodo" on your plate.

Deolu: one, two, three four.

Daddy: very good! clap for yourself

Deolu: now lets count the rice.

Isisasi:

Deolu: now lets count the rice.

You wan try? They have all the time in the world.

check this


my aunts 2 boys were fighting so she had to wade in ,she ask a simple question

aunty : ok who is guilty ?

d smallest one replies so quick before his older brother could respond: mummy mummy i am guilty (obviously the little chap didnt know the meaning of the word "guilty "prolly tot it meant innnnocent )

now this one was very very embarrassing


i have this uncle who has this little kid , about 2-3 yrs old ( cant really remember) this uncle of mine was having a get together with his old school mates and there was this friend of his that came in with his wife and kids , apparently my uncle was carrying his boy, as the boy saw his dads friend he said "YAM HEAD " very loud . . . . . .there was a sudden silence then all of a sudden his dads friend he called yam head burst into laughter , . . .and so did everyone at the gathering ,


on a real,that dude had a yam shaped head and that was his nick name from way back . . .

This is def my fav thread. been laafin so hard, everyone has logged on.
Makes me wonder what to expect since my 1yr old who is just starting to talk is sharp enough to know big from small size especially in edibles and laughs at my stepdad everytime he outwits him.

Just this afternoon, hy s/dad was trying to tuck him in bed and the boy just twisted then got off teh bed (in his imagination, a safe distance) then started laughing in a mocking manner. He knows to drag adults to doors when he meets them closed

HE later took biscuit to my cousin and said 'take', that one took and held on till he start screaming 'gimme gimme'
he collected it and moved on to his dad, repeated the same thing, when he got to me, he left the biscuit with me, went to get plate, cup and his feeding chair, just sat there till i opened the biscuit and poured it in the plate

he hasnt even started talking and he screams when watching football, dances to gospel and yori yori

from a 5 year old mid-way through dinner,

"Mummy the stew is too stewy!" lol

"aunty begs too much" ROTFLMAO. .
d only hilarious 1 i can remember was actually a Virgin Nigera advert on radio where "junior" says to his dad, "I'll tell mummy u gave dat yellow one ur number" lol

Uncle, I want to drink Big Stout

Deolu: now lets count the rice.

Just count the rice because judging by experience, children usually always get what they want

people please write more i'm laughing my fucking ass off but dont lie o cos some are adding jara tho

No b small jara,lol

Some yrs back when my youngest sister was still little. She formed d habit of staring at visitors whenever they were offered refreshments. My eldest sister would always scold her when they left.
One fateful sunday afternoon, a visitor came, and was offered a bottle of coke. My sister in her usual habit, went directly in front of him and kept staring at him. A bit ruffled, the man said "hey little girl, go and bring ur cup let me put for u". My little sister calmly replied, " no uncle, i want to drink frm the bottle". Mind u this conversation was in igbo. LMAO

you are BIG years old.

cant stop laughing.

This is my experience.
I visited a friend and was staying in the guest room. His 3 eyars daughter came to play with me and was in my bathroom when the house maid caller her to come and have her lunch.
Housemaid: Angela, where are you? your lunch is ready
Angela: Aunty, I'm coming in the guest bathroom
Housemaid: What are you doing there?
Angela: I am boboing

I cant stop laughing and after coming out I asked what would she had said if she was urinating
she said "I am weweing"

wewe, what?

Someone shared this sometimes ago:

A family comprising of mother, father, a 3yr old boy and a 6 months old baby were relaxing at home on a Saturday afternoon.

The mother was breastfeeding the little baby when a friend to their dad came in. After exchanging pleasantries with the family, he looked at the 3yr old and joking said.

Sammy, you don’t suck breast ….

Sammy replied…. No, I don’t suck breast O. It’s only daddy and baby that suck breast.



Another

I have “Speechless” by Michael Jackson on my phone and most times, my little daughter will asked me to play it for her.

On the Saturday after Michael Jackson’s death, she asked for my phone and was repeatedly playing speechless, speechless and hum the other part of the song. After some time, she came back to me;

Mummy, why did Michael Jackson die? I don’t know why I replied, but he was sick and died.
But, will he wake up again? No, I replied, he is dead, he cannot wake up again.
Ha Ha, why can’t he wake up now, It’s not possible I replied.
But why is it not possible eh, Shebi Jesus Christ died and wakes up again, why can’t Michael Jackson wake up.

It took me time before I could explain that Jesus cannot be compared to Michael Jackson

A small girl calling her dad S.H,because she often hears her mum calling her father S.H,which is the short form for SWEET HEART.

My neighbour's son was spanked by his mum for failing to heed her advice. Looking at his mum, he snared, "I will tell my mummy".

He calls his dad "honey".

This is perhaps because he hears his mum address him as "honey".