@Dasha01 its well wt u my sister. May God guide u n help u to make d right decision. Ameen. Why wld anyone say u can never have ur own kids? N what's ur diagnosis, pls? I've been on so many ttc forums n frm my serious observatn abi investigatn sef, I deduced that all these women always end up conceiving no matter d severity or complexity of their diagnosis, n even go on to have more kids; almost immediately after their first, with no more delay. So with God's mercy, its nt abt IF we'll have our own kids bt abt WHEN it wl happen n mashaAllaah it wl happen for evry1 of us vry soon. Ameen. U'r a woman with a complete female anatomy so it shldn't be surprising for ur womb to hold ur babies n deliver them when its time cos dts d sole functn of a womb. No1 has d right to write u off of carrying ur own babies, mashaAllaah u will, vry soon. AMEEN. So my sis, na u n God geh talk no be dem. Keep asking Him. @all, morning o hoping for a beautiful day ahead.

@Dasha01, surrogate is not bad at all. The questions are 1. Will your husband agree to it? 2. Will your sister selflessly agree to go through it? 3. Will she hand over the baby to you without problems?

If this questions can be answered then have a conversation with your maker. Tell him these are your plans and he should make your way smooth.

Another advise is if you can afford it, you and ur surrogate should do the ivf procedure together. God is faithful enough to make both a success. It is well sister

I might be new to this trend but not in trying to conceive. i have gone through must of the posts here and realized that almost all of us faced similar problem one way or the other. All i want to say is never loss hope. if i for one can get pregnant after ten years of ttc then every mother must surely smile one day. After all the humiliations for ten years not even a miscarriage God has finally blessed me. Right now i am 15 weeks old. As we continue to pray for one another may God see us through in Jesus name Amen.

as I type this am so very sad with tears rolling down my eyes...I had a heavy cramp all through the night, cudnt sleep...then I went to check in the bathroom... blood gushing out of my body...guess I had a early miscarriage.

Hmmnnn so throughout d 9t I was down with intense cramps dat I started crying already thinking I was going to wake up with AF bt till nw nothing I'm scared to do a test God pls help me and other mamas in my shoes

@Dasha01,i think is better to use an outsider, a matured person at heart without a husband that would work with conditions laid down by you without the influence of a 3rd party instead of your sister to avoid any story that touch at the end of the day and try to keep it a secret from everyone around you until you see yourself carrying your baby in your hands because you dont know who is who and moreover in naija people talk too much am sure you wont want them to be telling the child his or her life history daily,so to avoid that the less about the whole issue your family know the better.After all a child is what is needed not the story of how it happened. Best of luck to you my sister,i pray Gods favour will help you locate the right person for the job.

Good morning fruitful mamas,thanks for all your words of encouragement and prayers. Am so grateful. Almighty God will put a smile on our faces soon. Am hopeful and have renew my strength and faith in the Lord.

@dasha01, the Lord will gave u the wisdom to choose what is best for you, please whatever decision you make, please involve Lawyers and If you decide to use outsider, Please monitor and make extensive research about the person's health, family and know every aspect of the person's life. God be with you.

Baby dust to us all

@zeemoh2012, you are definitely pregnant...viola! you will get a bfp if you run a hpt on friday!
@mumydidi, an outsider will be nice, i was just considering my sister cos if she gets that amount as compensation it will be nice as well.
@fehintywealth, ofcourse, nothing can be done without a lawyer, for health issue, its just the ability to carry the baby and the willingness thats why i would prefer somone that has done CS before cos thats the only way to be 100% sure the baby doesnt get a drop of blood from the surrogate.
@itissettled, i seeked for counsel so i can talk with dh, as for running away with the baby, that one could be termed as a kidnap cos the baby has no relationship with the carrier....everything it takes to form a complete human being is gotten form the sperm and egg, after that the baby just gets only nourishment through the placenta and there is o more exchange of blood till time of delivery, thats why surrogacy is a better option compared to adoption or buying from a baby factory.

but seriously, this your advise get as e be o except i didnt get you properly, what if we go in together and they implant 2 or 3 embryos in each womb and all fertilise, no be there them go put us for newspaper say we need donation to buy pampers?

like i said before, my battle is more spiritual than physical cos of the things i experience any time i ovulate but if i stay for months without ovulating nothing happens, thats why this idea jus dropped in my mind, so that while they are still having sleepless night over me, we will invite them for our baby dedication, i hope to discuss it with my pastor as well, for now i dont want any vision or special prayers for conception, cos the people still call dh to say how is your wife? we are praying for you, dont worry you will carry your children and each time such calls come things start happening and i feel even if i go in for IVF they might still want to come a fight.....but one thing is certain, when Pharoah followed the children of Isreal to the red sea, thats where i signed his death warrant, it is well my sisters

@Jumayin, it is well, dust your self up and try again

@juwonesho, thanks, this thread is where we think aloud, what we cant share with friends we can share here to help us make decisions.

@idyobot. pls respect your height o. Someone post something with an instruction. You saw the instruction and went ahead to quote the person. watin you eat last night?. akpo or amala. Sister, kindly edit your post and remove that quote sharp sharp. Its not fair. We are meant to be our brothers keeper. Though this is a faceless forum but we watch our backs. Tomato Jos, sweet darly, try edit now.

@Dasha01. Our sisters have said it all. Be very very careful while considering a blood sister for surrogate. If I am allowed to say, I will say, don't use someone known to your family if possible the person should not even be known to your dh. I put dh to show you the sensitivity of what you want to do. People are soo different when it comes to sensitive issues. Have you watched " my mothers daughter" you might think its a film but it happens in real life.

Lets say your sister will be sincere, what about her husband?. Which husband will watch her wife carry a baby for 9 months and hand him/her over to another person. Forget the saying blood is thicker than water. You are bloody related to your sister and not her husband.

You are a devoted child of God. Remove the issue of anyone saying you will not conceive. Where was that person when you got married. Why didn't the person stop you from getting married. The wicked will only delay.. They can never deny our joy/destiny. God has paid the price for us, we are no more under bondage. You will have your own children at God's own appointed time. Have you noticed that almost all the people who started this thread have given birth to their own children.... Non shall be barren in the land.... That is the word of God and its TRUE.

Surrogate is not a bad idea if you will do it well. I have seen women regret ever opting for surrogate in their life because of the pains that comes after. The surrogate mother will use you as her ATM. You dare not take the child away from her sight. My sister, matter too much. Go very far from your environment. If possible use an older woman who has finished giving birth. Who is in dare need of money. Don't disclose your address, tribe. Leave no trace of contact after collecting the child. I love you. God understands your intent more than mam=n.

@zaramum, you've said it all, i wasnt considering what her husband will say, you know if Af no show up with depression na with confusion, meanwhile, a lawyer must be involved in surrogacy, and a surrogate can never claim ownership cos it wasnt her egg, where such problems comes is when you buy a child and the woman will one day threaten to tell the father of the child that she sold the baby to you guys, thats when you start bribing and bribing becos when you remember the big baby dedication you did, the fake testimony and all those you lied to about being pregnant...men you guys will pay till you relocate to where she cant find you or if the baby factory get busted and and they mention your name among those that patronise them, then you are in a big mess...surrogacy is like borrowing jus a womb, which one of our family friend just did and funny enough the baby looks like the mom....so dh wont have a problem with that if i suggest we do thesame and expect a child in 9 months than struggle with every month ttc....

my hope was really high this month, i guess i had hyperovulation and i was just teasing myself that it was possible i released up to 5 eggs cos i had ovulation cramps for 5 days and a positive ovulation test for up to 5 days as well followed by cramps in my pelvic region, high sense of smell and nauseous feelings which was quite usual only for dh to mistakenly tell somone that i wasnt feeling well, cos i actually fell ill due to the HSG wailing cos it was more than a cry, so the person quickly called and that was the begining of my problems, i was on 3am prayers from that time till now...i told dh to be careful the way he tells ppl about me, cos since i am ttc their ears is standing like that of an alsatian dog, what ever he says sounds like am about to excape from them cos they are the ones who must of bombarded me with medical reports that sound unbeleivable....but i am a survivor, this too will pass!

@ Dasha01, i quite understand you very well and i know what you are going through. To be candid with ourselves except we want to deny the fact most ttc is spiritual (am not saying all) especially the ones that has defied medications. Dearie, the scripture says hands join with hands shall not prosper, you will carry your baby because you are a joyful mother of a glorious generation. those that vowed are not greater than your creator. He is working in your favor.

A sister gave a testimony in my church some months back, she brought the medical report that states she can never give birth in life but God that uses the basket to shame bucket rose on her behalf and gave her a bouncing baby boy. Dear, i know you will laugh in Jesus name.
Many are the affliction of the righteous but the lord deliver them from it all. Weeping may endure all the night but joy cometh in the morning.

There is light at the end of every tunnel. SHALOM!!!

@ Jumayin, you are closer to your miracle than before. I experienced such in July, my AF was 3days late and since i had a consistent cycle of 26days i was so sure i was pregnant, announced to my hubby, i danced, praised, worship, rolled on the ground only for ugly AF to show up three days later but i know God is on the throne and his time is not always our time but am sure for one thing that we will carry our babies in our hands. please cheer up, don't despair.

Am sorry for the long post.

Lioha dear. I remember your testimony on the IVF thread. May God protect you and your baby.

lioha:
I might be new to this trend but not in trying to conceive. i have gone through must of the posts here and realized that almost all of us faced similar problem one way or the other. All i want to say is never loss hope. if i for one can get pregnant after ten years of ttc then every mother must surely smile one day. After all the humiliations for ten years not even a miscarriage God has finally blessed me. Right now i am 15 weeks old. As we continue to pray for one another may God see us through in Jesus name Amen.

@Dasha01, my dear. I asked if you could afford it first before suggesting you transfer to both you and the surrogate. If all implant na double blessings.

My advise, use a total stranger. It will save you from some stories in the future cos even with lawyers and all, this is Nigeria.

@Dasha01 I think u should chill a lil more b4 going into surrogacy I jst think 5 yrs is too soon to consider smthing like surrogacy #my opinion o. Bt if @ all ur mind is made up already pls be very sacred abt it as u knw dis is nigeria in dat case ur sis is nt an option no matter how close u ar dear infact if u have d means do it outside nigeria there ar pple who do it strictly as a business abroad. Its well my sister

Hello everyone......silent follower. So hubby and i have been trying for a while now and i missed my period, seven days now. Did a blood pregnancy Test on monday, and the result showed very faint positive. The doctor told me not to raise my hopes up, and lets see if my period doesnt come before we can be sure. Anybody with similar experience? please encourage me. Thanks!

berekete86:
Hello everyone......silent follower. So hubby and i have been trying for a while now and i missed my period, seven days now. Did a blood pregnancy Test on monday, and the result showed very faint positive. The doctor told me not to raise my hopes up, and lets see if my period doesnt come before we can be sure. Anybody with similar experience? please encourage me. Thanks!

Remain positive and avoid stress and anxiety. Heaven will smile on you.

@jumayin,just pull yourself together and know that you are closer to your testimony .

@dasha. My dear surrogacy is well planned and the woman the hospital use is a registered member of that hospital and has nothing to do with the parents of the child.except it is different in Nigeria where you are to bring a woman of your choice but that is risky.

surrogate mothers gives birth,goes under medical care for six month or a year depending on how fast she can carry another baby.it is her own business and has nothing to do with the parents of the child.hope this helps.

@berekete baby dust to you.it is a bfp,just claim it and remain positive

@ Dash....
Pls no matter the decision you take, let God reign in all.
My dearest, ever-loving Dash, the devil will not rob u of ur joy, even if u opt for surrogacy in the nearest future, u shall carry and give birth to urs .
My dear, if you are okay with surrogacy, i will suggest that after discussing it with Dh, and if he agrees then do it outside Nigeria where ur secret will be safe and intact cos if u do it here, people will eventually know and tongues will start wagging.

In all, "this too will pass" and it will end in praise.

God bless US all.

@twintower, thanks, my friend already told me they usually ask if you want a surrogate at the hospital, thanks for that reminder.
@janedyke6, i will have my children, meanwhile the cost of ticket can even do the IVF here and i can use the remaining money to pay prayer warriors to be on standby....lol...i feel like telling those fake people when they call again that i am no longer bothered abt pregnancy cos my surrogate is already 3 months gone, i guess that will put them into more confusion....but seriously nobody can open his or her mouth when the child looks like the couple, our friend that did theirs abroad told all of us as the pregnancy was progressing my dear, no be small money o! that one na monthly akawo! men it was damn expensive...but at the end if they didnt tell us we wouldnt have now as the baby looks like the mother.
@zeemoh, someone that got married at 20 can afford to stay for another 20 years knowing that at 40 she might still be lucky but somone that got married at 39 can as well opt for an IVF in less than a year so she can still use her egg....so its nots actually how long you've been married but how old you are sha....age is not a title that you cacn hold for another 10year, it keeps counting with each passing day..thats women wahala for you but thank God for medical science.

Dasha01:
@twintower, thanks, my friend already told me they usually ask if you want a surrogate at the hospital, thanks for that reminder.
@janedyke6, i will have my children, meanwhile the cost of ticket can even do the IVF here and i can use the remaining money to pay prayer warriors to be on standby....lol...i feel like telling those fake people when they call again that i am no longer bothered abt pregnancy cos my surrogate is already 3 months gone, i guess that will put them into more confusion....but seriously nobody can open his or her mouth when the child looks like the couple, our friend that did theirs abroad told all of us as the pregnancy was progressing my dear, no be small money o! that one na monthly akawo! men it was damn expensive...but at the end if they didnt tell us we wouldnt have now as the baby looks like the mother.
@zeemoh, someone that got married at 20 can afford to stay for another 20 years knowing that at 40 she might still be lucky but somone that got married at 39 can as well opt for an IVF in less than a year so she can still use her egg....so its nots actually how long you've been married but how old you are sha....age is not a title that you cacn hold for another 10year, it keeps counting with each passing day..thats women wahala for you but thank God for medical science.

very true my sister I reason along with u. God shall c us through

@jumayin dearie it is well, you can only get stronger.

I don't believe in waiting for twenty years after marriage with no child before you start looking for others means of having a child, I don't mean evil ways o.

@dasha01 may God grant you and Hubby the wisdom to go through this, and may you find Favour all through.

there is nothing wrong with surrogacy, the child is completely yours, the only thing you will miss is early morning sickness, my dear.

@Juwonesho,thanks so much,all will be well with us all.@zeemoh,pls relax and tell it to God instead of worrying,ur blessing is already perfected,pls stay positive dear.@jumayin,it is well only Him understands,pls be encouraged and pls dont be depressed.@dasha,i quite respect ur opinion,i knw of a celebrity though cant remember her name for now,she suffered for so many years from endometrosis before she opted for surogacy,ithink she had twins in her last surrogacy,i will also advice that u use an outsider,or can ur sister keep it away from other relatives for ever?my sister no be everybody understand d meaning of surrogacy oo,i think hospitals should have arrangement for this,some women are out there who are ready to do that,once they are tested and trusted and all councelling done wth d woman then go ahead,l,to crown it all PUT IT TO GOD IN PRAYER.all will be well in Jesus name

Dasha01 surrogacy is not a bad idea at all,but what I dont think is d best idea is ur sister being d surrogate mother,there's an adage in Yoruba that says ohun ti a fi aso bo lo n niyi,*whatever that's covered is d one that has value*. Your going outside Nigeria does not have to be in UK or USA,there are other African countries that does it.But all in all ask for divine direction from God,I know he will direct ur steps.

@Jumayin put yourself together,this God will surprise you when you least expect,so be of good cheer. Remember that there are some pple spending thousands of naira for Af to show face,in any situation we find ourself let's learn to give thanks,soon it will lead to testimony for u.

@lioha congrat the lord will see u through

@dasha01. Dear your decision is not bad. Just make sure you follow Gods direction. I see you rejoicing soon.

JUMAYIN:
as I type this am so very sad with tears rolling down my eyes...I had a heavy cramp all through the night, cudnt sleep...then I went to check in the bathroom... blood gushing out of my body...guess I had a early miscarriage.

OMG!!! Didn't c dis post earlier I'm so sorry dearie its nt jst time when its time nothing will stop it by d grace of God pls put urself together and renew ur hope. Its well with us all #hugs

Jumayin it is well. Just talk to yourself its a new month of new opportunities and new possibilities. Try again, this can be the cycle you have being waiting for.

@Dasha, just rely on God for the best option. All will end well, it all a matter of time

@ Dasha i deliberately logged in because of

@all, thanks so much for your kind support, I told dh about it and he said "when it feels like God is not answering our prayers, then its time to wait and meditate on His word" doctor gave us from now till december to try natural conception. Anything can still happen any time soon, d bible says "to him that is joined to all the living, there is hope, for a living dog is better than a dead lion" our God is an expert
In last minute miracles...

Meanwhile does anyone know where I cn get virus and send it as a text to this evil caller so it can just delete our contacts from their phone? Am serious o

@Redeemed thanks for the mention. I'm good, just busy month coupled with my expired subscription. Tried posting over the weekend by MTN didn't allow me. Thanks once more. @Dasha01 other mamas have said it all. So I believe you've removed your sister from the list. Let hospital choose for you. You can write to moderator to remove the post copied, that's the fastest means. As for the virus that will delete the numbers, its up to you and your dh. Always pray that all that will you evil will get in return all they wish you while you'll remain untouched by their words. Again, your dh must learn to always say both of you are very fine whenever anyone asks. If he can't say that, then let his response be we thank God. If the person start asking about baby, he should say God is at work and try to stop the discussion there. Its too much talk talk that lead to all those troubles. Let him limit the way he talk with them and sometimes ignore their calls and never call back. With these methods they get tired as they won't av any valuable update. Its well. @Newbies welcome and have a short fruitful stay. Congrats to bfp mamas.

Join us to thank God for adding another year to our marriage..It is 4 fruitful years already.

Please someone should advice me on what to do.I am so confused but I know this result is not from God almighty.I went to the hospital and my test result says I am okay but dh has no sperm at all.I have never heard of such thing.my sisters what do I do to reverse this.I am frustrated in my spirit but I know God will lift up this burden and give me a lighter one.I cannot even cry because he will feel very bad.please helpe with your advice