Dear Nairalanders,

A friend of mine sought my opinion saying that his wife goes through his phone records and messages and she always asks him who called him each time he answers the phone.

He wants to know if this is right since he does not do the same to her.

What do you think my people?

I think that your friend and his wife need to re-evaluate their marriage; she doesn’t trust him enough; if she does, she would never confront him anytime his pone rings or ask him stupid question about his call records.

dats why shz ur wyfi
n dats why drs been an increased rate ov HBP AMONG WOMEN

Do the same with her and she will stop doing that

!

CrazyMan:

I think that your friend and his wife need to re-evaluate their marriage; she doesn’t trust him enough; if she does, she would never confront him anytime his pone rings or ask him stupid question about his call records.

Nice point.

There is nothing wrong except if you are a playa. Do unto others wht you will like to do unto you, (golden rule)

biggaboy:

!
Nice point.

There is nothing wrong except if you are a playa. Do unto others wht you will like to do unto you, (golden rule)

gbam.

If you have nothing to hide then no need to panic.

FBI and various secret/govt agencies can also go through your phone but they wont tell you.

tpia.:

gbam.

If you have nothing to hide then no need to panic.

FBI and various secret/govt agencies can also go through your phone but they wont tell you.

Why is the woman worried too?

I do not think it is a problem for a woman to ask her husband who is he calling, but if your wife is constantly checking your phone and asking questions, maybe you have done or showed her some signs of cheating for her to do that to you. My advice to you is talk to your wife and find out what her concerns are, plus if you are faithful to her show her and prove to her your innocence and your faithfulness to your marriage.

egyptian84:

I do not think it is a problem for a woman to ask her husband who is he calling, but if your wife is constantly checking your phone and asking questions, maybe you have done or showed her some signs of cheating for her to do that to you. My advice to you is talk to your wife and find out what her concerns are, plus if you are faithful to her show her and prove to her your innocence and your faithfulness to your marriage.

Such woman will die of heart attack and the woman that she is worried about will move into the house few weeks after her burial.

why do you say that femmy?

egyptian84:

why do you say that femmy?

Cos it is important for a man and woman to learn to trust one another, and when the trust is killed, they need to find a way to rebuild it and not just be suspicious of everything around them and their partner.

I agree, which is why I mentioned earlier that maybe the husband has done something in the past to betray his trust from his wife, if not then he should sit down and ask her if she trusts him

egyptian84:

I agree, which is why I mentioned earlier that maybe the husband has done something in the past to betray his trust from his wife, if not then he should sit down and ask her if she trusts him

Even if the man has done something to break the trust, it is up to the woman and the man to work it out and fix their problems and find a way to trust again.
If you cant fix, why wasting time?

Fhemmmy:

Even if the man has done something to break the trust, it is up to the woman and the man to work it out and fix their problems and find a way to trust again.
If you cant fix, why wasting time?

life isnt that simple, sorry.


If he doesnt want her checking his phone, then he shouldnt give her a reason to.

Girlfriends, concubines and mistresses also check phones, FYI. Its not just a wife thing.

CrazyMan:

I think that your friend and his wife need to re-evaluate their marriage; she doesn’t trust him enough; if she does, she would never confront him anytime his pone rings or ask him stupid question about his call records.

Thank u jare. Obviously,She has issues. She is just being paranoid and probably lacks self esteem.

Lol, funny i should stumble on this cos it happened to me some months ago.

How my babe got my facebook password, I dont know. I must have jaboed in a state of ecstacy or something. Anyway, she went sniffing thru my facebook inbox and found hard evidence there. Omo, she confronted me o, with names sef. Denying it was pointless and would have made me look more foolish.

Even though we have since settled, I still maintain she was wrong for doing that. It just showed how much she trusted me at that time.

all's fair in love and war.

Taking a man for granted often ends in regret.

@ Hesperus - she was obviously right to be suspicious!!

It's not right to sneak looks through your husband's stuff but let's be honest, we all do it from time to time. Curiosity is a bad thing. Lol. I've caught him looking through my stuff too. Not looking for somthing incriminating on either front - just being nosey as humans are.

If someone is doing it regularly because they suspect something - either falsely or not - that's a whole other issue.

You'd be amazed at how many people are too daft to delete stuff though, I know so many people (guys and girls) who have been busted cos of texts, emails and Fb messages. Guess its lipstick on your collar for the 21st century.

tpia.:

life isnt that simple, sorry.


If he doesnt want her checking his phone, then he shouldnt give her a reason to.

Girlfriends, concubines and mistresses also check phones, FYI. Its not just a wife thing.

That is why if all those people aren't careful, they will just die of heart attack, cos they will one day see what they never expected and shock will send them to early grave.

Fhemmmy:

That is why if all those people aren't careful, they will just die of heart attack, cos they will one day see what they never expected and shock will send them to early grave.

do you have any instances of such, or is this just wishful thinking?

Women have met their boyfriends and spouses on top of other women and this didnt send them to an early grave.

tpia.:


do you have any instances of such, or is this just wishful thinking?

Women have met their boyfriends and spouses on top of other women and this didnt send them to an early grave.

Anyone that always anticipating or suspecting his or her partner will die of over excitement 
I would rather have the woman come and talk to me and tell me how she feels and we talk about it.
I have no problem with my woman using my fone and all that, she can even answer the fone, but now snoop when i am not around? she doesnt need that.

Fhemmmy:

Anyone that always anticipating or suspecting his or her partner will die of over excitement
I would rather have the woman come and talk to me and tell me how she feels and we talk about it.
I have no problem with my woman using my fone and all that, she can even answer the fone, but now snoop when i am not around? she doesnt need that.

if your partner smells some strange perfume on you, or sees unfamiliar lipstick on your clothes, then shouldnt she check your phone?

You may also have yelled out someone's name in your sleep.

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tpia.:

all's fair in love and war.

Taking a man for granted often ends in regret.

what is fair in love and war? this is not love and that guy is talking about his wife. come on where are you?

rexertea:

what is fair in love and war? this is not love and that guy is talking about his wife. come on where are you?

so is she checking his phone records out of hatred? Where are you?

I dont know why so many Naija guys will bend over backwards to defend infidelity as if nothing else dey this world.

tpia.:

if your partner smells some strange perfume on you, or sees unfamiliar lipstick on your clothes, then shouldnt she check your phone?

You may also have yelled out someone's name in your sleep.

A man that loves his wife and cheating but have passion for his wife or something wont leave evidence around.
BTW, what is wrong in communication?
Instead of her going thru the fone, which is easier, talk to me, or giving herself wahala by going thru my phone?

It is neither wrong nor right.

Its best not to because what you dont look for you dont get, i have done it and i know what i am talking about, ladies pls dont look for what you dont want.

Fhemmmy:

A man that loves his wife and cheating but have passion for his wife or something wont leave evidence around.
BTW, what is wrong in communication?
Instead of her going thru the fone, which is easier, talk to me, or giving herself wahala by going thru my phone?

talk to you and hear a lie?

Cheating men arent known for owning up to their affairs most times unless they're caught redhanded.

Besides, its not uncommon for some women to trust their men until they find themselves with an STD of unknown origin.

tpia.:

talk to you and hear a lie?

Cheating men arent known for owning up to their affairs most times unless they're caught redhanded.

Besides, its not uncommon for some women to trust their men until they find themselves with an STD of unknown origin.

Well, i will tell the truth.
Besides, for me to cheat, there has to be a good reason behind it, and we are now in the jet age where people protects themselves.
Anyhow, i will not stop a woman that wld like to go thru my fone, but i will intentionally plant things for her to find and get heart ache, cos i am not a monster that she cant approach me easily.

Fhemmmy:

Well, i will tell the truth.
Besides, for me to cheat, there has to be a good reason behind it, and we are now in the jet age where people protects themselves.
Anyhow, i will not stop a woman that wld like to go thru my fone, but i will intentionally plant things for her to find and get heart ache, cos i am not a monster that she cant approach me easily.

I like your quote, by the way you seem to know a lot about these mind games.

rexertea:

by the way you seem to know a lot about these mind games.

quite.

Fhemmmy:

Well, i will tell the truth.
Besides, for me to cheat, there has to be a good reason behind it, and we are now in the jet age where people protects themselves.
Anyhow, i will not stop a woman that wld like to go thru my fone, but i will intentionally plant things for her to find and get heart ache, cos i am not a monster that she cant approach me easily.

cheating men rarely tell the truth.

As for protecting yourself, there are things called weak moments when you're in that lifestyle.

You can plant whatever you like for your woman. If she's smart she'll do the same.