I know you are fed up.... I know you are earnestly
tired.... There is no trouble free marriage. Every marriage
has its "BUTS". The opportunity to leave or stay in a
marriage exist every day. Lack or presence of
money, infidelity or faithfulness, good or bad
health, inability to conceive on time or having
children too soon or nagging or pleasant mother- in-law... it's either one thing or another.... no
marriage is perfectly perfect.
To leave or to stay is a choice every married
individual have to make. It all depends on what
one is looking for. One can be in a good marriage
and want a way out, because what they see is always the wrong stuff - even when everyone
around them can see the good in their spouse, no
matter how good, they'll never see it. The simplest
of thing like a smelly feet or quacky voice can make
some people pack it up- no one can convince them
to see the good in their marriage because they have already made up their mind. On the other
hand, someone in a bad marriage will hang around
because they belief they can make it work. No
matter what people say, they'll always give a
reason to stay - even when is obvious that there's
gross unfairness. We can only see what we want to see. You can see
black in plain white, red can be colourless to who
does not want to see. Until there's a decision to
change our focus and be truthful with the vision of
the picture we behold of our marriage, am afraid,
nothing can be changed. Be ruthlessly honest with yourself, when you look
at your spouse, what do you see? Divorce or future
everlasting? If you are the type that always see
divorce, unless you change your focus, divorce
may be inevitable. It's easier to work and walk in
line with what you see. Tell me, how can you reach a destination you can't see or perceive? To be blind
is not a problem.... but to fail to see through the
eyes of others could be more dangerous than
being blind. I am not saying don't divorce, I am not saying you
should die in there - but before you take that step...
before you head in the direction of "Me do us
apart", make sure you have done your very very
best..... make sure you have think it through with
your inner spirit. Be certain you can bear the burnt of the fire of life.... don't leave a stone unturned
between you and "had I known". Things might be
terrible for now.... but who knows, maybe if you
seek help, may be if you pray it through, may be if
you calm down and let God.... may be if you forgive
you and your spouse...... if you have a little bit more patience, if you listen and talk a little bit more....
who knows, just maybe..... maybe we can have a
new song... where you will look into your spouse's
eyes and say "I love you" again. May your children
can leap into your embrace in gratitude for your
perseverance.... who knows? - just you and God knows. Don't quite too soon. #ifyoumustDOITRIGHT