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Sincere Advises by Nicolax: 11:18am On Aug 19, 2016
Hello good morning, my name is Nicolax and this is my first topic on this great forum. Feels good after following for about 8 months now. The important information I get from this forum is endless and helpful to me especially in making some critical decisions.

Without wasting your precious time I just need your sincere advises on a situation bothering me for about 3 months now. Please pay attention as this might be a little complicated.

[b]I met with this particular lady (on Facebook) early 2015 and we became friends from that moment sharing our private matters among ourselves and trying to reach out towards each other. This has been happening for a while until she travelled out of the country for a 6 month course in the states.

During this period of time, we lost contact and I couldn't connect to her throughout that six months until this year when we reunited. We became friends once again picking up tracks of what we had in the past and we fell in love with each other and we became lovers this year.

Not the problem is since we have known each other I haven't seen her before I know how she looks like because we had been talking on Skype for a while and we share pictures and I also have her on my instagram (hence the doubt of her being real)

I have asked her several times asking why we are yet to meet and she said she is trying to be careful to trust me because she don't want to jump into relationships (her past one was a flop) but this has been going on for three months now.
I love her, she loves me but we haven't seen each other.

Please I need advises. Could this be real or she is only taking me for a ride [/b]

Thank you for reading
Re: Sincere Advises by Twaci(f): 11:25am On Aug 19, 2016
Either she catfished or she's overly cautious. Give her time. But if the delay becomes unbearably long, give her an ultimatum.

Either u meet up or u break up.

One question though, do u send money to her?

2 Likes

Re: Sincere Advises by Nicolax: 11:30am On Aug 19, 2016
Twaci:
Either she catfished or she's overly cautious. Give her time. But if the delay becomes unbearably long, give her an ultimatum.

Either u meet up or u break up.

One question though, do u send money to her?

The same thing she asked for MORE TIME. I love her sincerely and I think she does too because she gives me her time and commitment. She calls and most time she initiates the chats (I am a busy person sometimes)

I am just so confused why someone I had known for a while and who I love wouldn't be eager to meet me in person.

About the monetary aspect, no I don't send her money. She is financially buoyant also
Re: Sincere Advises by Twaci(f): 11:34am On Aug 19, 2016
Nicolax:


The same thing she asked for MORE TIME. I love her sincerely and I think she does too because she gives me her time and commitment. She calls and most time she initiates the chats (I am a busy person sometimes)

I am just so confused why someone I had known for a while and who I love wouldn't be eager to meet me in person.

About the monetary aspect, no I don't send her money. She is financially buoyant also
Like I said before, she could be using someone else pictures or is just been cautious.

Give her time then an ultimatum.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: Sincere Advises by Nicolax: 11:42am On Aug 19, 2016
Twaci:
Like I said before, she could be using someone else pictures or is just been cautious.

Give her time then an ultimatum.

we have spoken on Skype about 10 different occasions so I don't have a doubt about her being real.

About the ultimatum, Did that once but we came back together after I let her ago. Maybe I should revisit that. Right?
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 11:43am On Aug 19, 2016
OP if you skyped with her and you had " visual " conversations asin you saw her mouth moving then she is real, you can't fake that, as to why she hasn't seen you, most times girls never take "online" relationships seriously, she might just be using you to pass time, my advice is this tell her that you have met someone, allow her to miss your presence and realise your importance to her life and if she comes back begging you have your answer, if she doesn't then am correct

3 Likes

Re: Sincere Advises by Nicolax: 11:46am On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:
OP if you skyped with her and you had " visual " conversation asin you saw her mouth moving then she is real, you can't fake that, as to why she hasn't seen you, most times girls never take "online" relationships seriously, she might just be using you to pass time, my advice is this tell her that you have met someone, allow her to miss your presence and realise your importance to her life and if she comes back begging you have your answer, if she doesn't then am correct

Thank you so much. I will put this in play
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 11:57am On Aug 19, 2016
Yry to pay her a visit, if she avoids that. Sir you are not important to her .



Plain truth smiley

1 Like

Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:01pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:
OP if you skyped with her and you had " visual " conversations asin you saw her mouth moving then she is real, you can't fake that, as to why she hasn't seen you, most times girls never take "online" relationships seriously, she might just be using you to pass time, my advice is this tell her that you have met someone, allow her to miss your presence and realise your importance to her life and if she comes back begging you have your answer, if she doesn't then am correct
did you just made sense today?


I'm proud of you son grin
Re: Sincere Advises by Sexxkillz: 12:04pm On Aug 19, 2016
You cannot give an ultimatum to someone you haven't met. She's trying to trust you. She's learning to trust you. Ultimatum means desperation. You say you love her. If you love her like you claim, you would be patient till she is ready enough to trust and meet you.
She owes you nothing. If you cannot wait, you move. You owe her nothing.

Work things out for you both to meet. If you guys haven't met, there'll be no progress made and the feelings will fizzle out, especially when either of you meets someone new. If she's not ready, and you are not ready to wait, go your separate ways.

Trust is very important in a relationship. If she cannot trust you, she won't meet you. If she doesn't trust you on meeting you, she'll bail. People who have had negative relationship experiences are the most difficult to fall in love with. They set up so many barricades to protect their emotions. Take into consideration also, her personality.

Your best option now is to continue to wait, while increasing the tempo of your communication. You can never force emotions as strong love.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:05pm On Aug 19, 2016
knightnemesis:
did you just made sense today?


I'm proud of you son grin
you made sense today*

GST121
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:07pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:

you made sense today*

GST121
cheesy grin

troll grin
Re: Sincere Advises by Sexxkillz: 12:07pm On Aug 19, 2016
knightnemesis:
did you just made sense today?


I'm proud of you son grin
Your English teacher isn't proud, though.

Make him/her proud today.

2 Likes

Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:09pm On Aug 19, 2016
Sexxkillz:
Your English teacher isn't proud, though.

Make him/her proud today.
albino grin
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:09pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:

you made sense today*

GST121
GNS 101 *
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:11pm On Aug 19, 2016
Sexxkillz:
You cannot give an ultimatum to someone you haven't met. She's trying to trust you. She's learning to trust you. Ultimatum means desperation. You say you love her. If you love her like you claim, you would be patient till she is ready enough to trust and meet you.
She owes you nothing. If you cannot wait, you move. You owe her nothing.

Work things out for you both to meet. If you guys haven't met, there'll be no progress made and the feelings will fizzle out, especially when either of you meets someone new. If she's not ready, and you are not ready to wait, go your separate ways.

Trust is very important in a relationship. If she cannot trust you, she won't meet you. If she doesn't trust you on meeting you, she'll bail. People who have had negative relationship experiences are the most difficult to fall in love with. They set up so many barricades to protect their emotions. Take into consideration also, her personality.

Your best option now is to continue to wait, while increasing the tempo of your communication. You can never force emotions as strong love.

Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:14pm On Aug 19, 2016
WindUpMerchant:
GNS 101 *



i hope you are ready for him and his partner in crime grin

them are coming for your head grin
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:15pm On Aug 19, 2016
WindUpMerchant:
GNS 101 *




So you actually think that I will correct a mistake with a mistake?

Public schools and private school don't use the same curriculum

Might have been GNS 101 in yours was GST121(use of English) in mine

2 Likes

Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:19pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:

So you actually think that I will correct a mistake with a mistake?

Public schools and private school don't use the same curriculum

Might have been GNS 101 in yours was GST121(use of English) in mine
lol pipe down man. I knew your use of Gst was no mistake.
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:20pm On Aug 19, 2016
knightnemesis:
i hope you are ready for him and his partner in crime grin


them are coming for your head grin
haha! man, I have no problem with them. I'm safe.
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:21pm On Aug 19, 2016
[s]
2BB4CB3E:

So you actually think that I will correct a mistake with a mistake?

Public schools and private school don't use the same curriculum

Might have been GNS 101 in yours was GST121(use of English) in mine
[/s]
shut up


stop being an ass hole grin
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:22pm On Aug 19, 2016
WindUpMerchant:
haha! man, I have no problem with them. I'm safe.
cool.

I gat your back grin

1 Like

Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:22pm On Aug 19, 2016
knightnemesis:
i hope you are ready for him and his partner in crime grin


them are coming for your head grin
They are coming for your head*

Smh
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:24pm On Aug 19, 2016
sorry op

You just have to think for self.

this thread is dead on arrival grin
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:25pm On Aug 19, 2016
.
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:25pm On Aug 19, 2016
WindUpMerchant:
lol pipe down man. I knew your use of Gst was no mistake.
I knew that your use of GST was no mistake*

This is why GST cost more than GNS
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:25pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:

They are coming for your head*

Smh
shm on you too grin

correct me again grin


you'll get tired of quoting people randomly
Re: Sincere Advises by knightnemesis: 12:28pm On Aug 19, 2016
[s]
2BB4CB3E:

I knew that your use of GST was no mistake*

This is why GST cost more than GNS[/s]
broke ass nigga forming posh grin


shm
Re: Sincere Advises by MENZPRIDE(m): 12:32pm On Aug 19, 2016
Op, I understand your plight. That's one issue with Ladies, she loves you but she doesn't want to come off cheap. I was in a situation like that previously. My friend told me her fears: If she transport herself across the Niger to my place and we couldn't strike a rhythm, if we couldn't feel the passion or connection physically, that we share online. she will feel distraught, dejected and cheapened. She might not be able to forgive herself. Worse still, how does she compose and gather herself back to her place with the feeling and knowledge that she didn't measure up to my requirement and standard.....
For a Guy, it is easy to walk away. But for a Lady, I doubt, especially the matured and responsible ones.
My suggestion;
Offer to meet her up in her town or state of residence. Not necessarily her home, probably an eatery or any other open public place. Play a smart one, tell her it is an official trip to her area or close-by and for her sake you want to squeeze out some time to be with her.
The outcome will determined what happens next.
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 12:34pm On Aug 19, 2016
2BB4CB3E:

I knew that your use of GST was no mistake*

This is why GST cost more than GNS
Waste of time. ur a broke as$. who cares if you attended a glorified secondary school? wind ur neck in.

1 Like

Re: Sincere Advises by AfroKnight: 12:50pm On Aug 19, 2016
She may be hiding something. Maybe chronic mouth odour (halitosis) or something else. grin

Just fix a date at a busy place like a small café within a mall. She may feel more comfortable with many people around. A movie date is also a good idea. Just make sure it's a nice romantic movie not action film.
Re: Sincere Advises by Nobody: 2:03pm On Aug 19, 2016
Hm. First timer or you old timer in another account?

You live in the same country and are yet to meet?

Bhet why?

Since when does meeting = relationship? Cant she meet you as friends or are you forcing a "meet and become exclusive" on her?

Did she actually tell you that she is in love with you or you are extrapolating feelings?

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