I grew up with this notion that partners who have dated/courted for a very long time have greater possibility of building stronger relationships. As the years roll by, I'm beginning to see things differently. Dating someone for years without concrete marriage plans is to me, utterly useless! It's even a hopeless case when cohabiting is involved.

It's not a bad idea spending time to study someone as you date him/her; it's necessary, yet, it must not necessarily take you years to also know if both of you are fit to tie the knot together or not. Staying in a relationship for years, in the absence of marriage, with that irrelevant idea that you are studying the other person means two things - it's either you are deceiving yourself or deceiving the other person. It's just like a man who builds a house halfway and leaves it for years, telling everyone that he would want the rains to come on it to make the blocks stronger...even when it's clear that he doesn't possess the resources to make it a completed house.

I personally don't buy the idea of women staying for years in relationships with the hope that the guy has promised to marry them. The question should be: What is he waiting for after all these years? Is he still studying you? Sister, you are neither a book nor a university course!!! Is he waiting to be financially stable first? If that's the case, that's when you come in. If you discover the guy is all you want in a life partner, both in appearance, character and educational achievements, you can assist him by putting heads together to make it happen. It's useless waiting for the guy to become financially buoyant; what if after 5/6 years, he's still not buoyant? Will you walk out of the affair? Successful women assist in building their homes, they don't wait for it to be built

It's the ability to accept the other person's flaws in a relationship that sustains the relationship, even into marriage; it's not by many years of dating/courtship.

I know young women who have told me openly in the past that I didn't know what I wanted; yeah, because I left them so early into the supposed affairs before they could get hurt emotionally. I used foresight and not hindsight. I never wanted to waste their time!

There's a particular age and stage we get to in life where we need to leave rigmarole and up-and-down relationships for teenagers! Know what you want and sustain it; if you are not ready, work on yourself and your life and stop wasting your time and that of other people!!!

Good afternoon and Happy Sunday to everyone!

I was here

Very insightful Thread.

dollyjoy:
Very insightful Thread.

Thanks, madam.

kingsilly:
I was here

Long time no see

There's nothing wrong of having a long term relationships... Some are not ready financially, some don't have their own house yet, some are jobless ...

So, why rush of getting married when u both unstable? I think , I am OK with this as long there's no Cheating

Very lengthy....but informative as well though i stopped half way

Op na yr own u they talk

[quote author=Romancer post=49063088][/quote




Who? ME? u call me a guy?


Nawa for u... I'm a female... Ask smellinganus he can testify on tat

TrapQueen77:




There's nothing wrong of having a long term relationships... Some are not ready financially, some don't have their own house yet, some are jobless ...

So, why rush of getting married when u both unstable? I think , I am OK with this as long there's no Cheating

What should be the priority of a jobless man? Is it not to get a job first? Any jobless man who places relationship above getting a job is foolish. If you are not ready, why delve into something you are not ready to push up to another stage?

In the end, everythings comes to emotional wreckage!

everything has its advantage and disadvantage




long relationship has its benefit and also its danger likewise short one but the main thing is to know where your relationship is heading to

[quote author=TrapQueen77 post=49063204][/quote]i know... E juss b sey na every thread i dey see u 4 this section

Nice one.

cruzita:
everything has its advantage and disadvantage




long relationship has its benefit and also its danger likewise short one but the main thing is to know where your relationship is heading to

If there's no concrete reason why long term partners in a relationship are not married, it means the affair is probably heading no where.

WHIZKIDEFE:
Nice one.

Thanks, man.

Rocktation.

McBrooklyn:
OP, what about the uselessness of fûcking one chick for too long??

If you search the Sexuality Section, you might find a thread that covers that aspect!

Rapmoney:
What should be the priority of a jobless man? Is it not to get a job first? Any jobless man who places relationship above getting a job is foolish. If you are not ready, why delve into something you are not ready to push up to another stage?

In the end, everythings comes to emotional wreckage!

OK... But my question is... If u have a job, Is ur salary enough to support ur family?

How many of us Here have a salary of 500,000naira and above monthly?

Doesn't mean if u dont have a job, u don't have a house, u are not allowed to be in relationship... That is why so many are in relationships they are not yet married coz they are not financially stable... They don't want to make their families suffered...

Romancer:
i know... E juss b sey na every thread i dey see u 4 this section

U will surely see me in every romance sextion... So deal with it

clock

I don't think so

TrapQueen77:




OK... But my question is... If u have a job, Is ur salary enough to support ur family?

How many of us Here have a salary of 500,000naira and above monthly?

Doesn't mean if u dont have a job, u don't have a house, u are not allowed to be in relationship... That is why so many are in relationships they are not yet married coz they are not financially stable... They don't want to make their families suffered...

I blinked my eyes many times before I could clearly see that u wrote 500k up there! 500k monthly? So u expect a man to start earning close to 500k monthly before he gets married? This attitude is among the reasons why so many women out there waste years in their life till they approach menopause!

McBrooklyn:



L-O-L




Bruh, how far you now?? I'm just kidding now abi someone cannot play with you again??

No shaking! Na my style...u be my guy too nah

I nor fit read abeg, him heart still dey intact or she break am

honeygirl17:
I nor fit read abeg, him heart still dey intact or she break am

I guess u read it upside down.

It makes no sense really to date someone for a long time without marriage in sight

Rapmoney:
I guess u read it upside down.

I wanted to edit after reading.