I AM A MAN.

That's the only 'crime' I committed.

I get into argument with a woman and she verbally abuses me and calls me unprintable names. She freely uses the weapon of words, and I am left defenceless as she crumbles my ego.

It enrages me but I can't react. I am not expected to.

If I talk back, I would be less than a man. If I hit her, even when she hits me first, I would be a beast; a man who can't control his temper, and if I walk away I am a weakling; a man who gives up before a woman. A half man.

I am expected to bear my pains and not cry out, even when it hurts beyond measure. A man never cries openly like a baby, they say.

And so I must bear the pain of disappointment and heartbreak, of the loss of a loved one, of physical torture, of emotional stress, of all manners of tragedy, and not let a tear fall.

But a woman can wail and scream, shout and cry, because she is only a woman and is naturally 'weak', and there's nothing wrong with openly venting those emotion of vulnerability.

And so I lean on my own shoulder, lick my own wounds, tell myself I am alright, that all is well and move on.

When it is war, I am expected to pick up arms and march to the war front, to kill or be killed without pity or mercy.

Because I am a man and I should be strong, strong enough to fight for both genders.

I provide every material needs of my family, and it is taken as normal. What i am supposed to do, and then they would remember I am the head of the family.

But when a woman provides, she becomes a 'super woman', praised, adored and held in exceptional esteem by all.

If I fail to provide, I become a villain and an outcast in my own house. I would be called incompetent, labelled weak and useless.

But for the woman who does not provide nor bring anything into the home, she is 'just a woman', and therefore the responsibility should never fall on her.

She is already absolved.

All the tough work are left for me; driving trucks, digging mines, operating heavy machinery etc. Because i am a man?

If I become a hair stylist, or a beautician, I am looked down upon or even tagged 'gay'. Now my gender has to choose for me in the eyes of the society?

It's difficult to believe I can be faithful to my woman. Just because i am a man? Yet many women cheat, and in the eyes of the world they are innocent because they were not caught in the act.

Yet I have been judged already.

She thumbs a ride and gets a lift because she appears vulnerable and needs help. I thumb and don't get because I ought to have hustled to buy my own car.

She flaunts her 'assets' and gets worldwide accolade and acceptance for being beautiful, I flaunt my six packs and is called a lazy bum who wouldn't want to work but whiles away precious time sculpting 'broke' muscles...

I marry a woman who is financially well to do more than I am, and I become a gold digger. A woman who does same does so for financial security; a necessity in marriage.

So she does well.

A lady meets a man and sleeps with him for money, society says she's trying to survive, and she is even pitied. A man does same and is a douchebag, a leech who lives and feeds off women.

A misfit.

And because I am a man who should be strong, who should be responsible and have all things under control at all times, who should be strong for and provide for his woman, I clamp down on all my pain and weaknesses.

Because my anatomy says I am male.

And they'll say this post is biased, lopsided because of my gender.

But the truth remains that I am fully human just like any other woman, and i should be allowed to fully live my life as such.

I am not just my gender.

I am me.

Op, you should know that the society is made to care less for men, even though it's called a man's world.
The society is always ready to provide succour, aid or shield for women but not in the case of men. We are all born soldiers meant to protect, suffer struggle and at times die struggling with no one acknowledging our efforts.
You get to hear of women empowerment programmes, women aid center, Ministry of women Affairs, Child and women care/support group, affirmative action for women, women emancipation programme, Women and Young Person's Law etc. but nothing like these exists for men. The truth is that by societal standard, we can't be molested, assaulted, cheated on, abused, victimised, even the law has it that only women can be raped.
It takes a lot to be a man but you can't complain cuz no one is ready to hear you.