| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Whynotthetruth(m): 6:10pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
destinel:
I tell you she's not what you think, things just got a little out of control than she and myself can handle. And we really felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it.
Bros, if you BELIEVE that she's into you as much as you are into her...then go ahead...Though, your family due to societal pressure would object...but the ultimate decision lies with you...Over time, they will come to accept your decision especially if your woman can win them over with her character... Don't follow the timetable or stereotyped system of this generation...Just follow your HEART...God bless us all... 1 Like |
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| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by saasala(m): 6:12pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.
So we got really close, talking and started dating, it was then I discovered she had had two kids before, I couldn't believe my ears.
From her explanation, she really had a very rough past. she was dating a guy she really doesn't love.
After having a kid for him, they separated due to some reasons; then 2 years forward the guy came back begging, she agreed and then the second kid came.
Few years going forward, things really got nasty. The guy impregnated two other ladies, making her very depressed and frustrated. So she left him and had since over 7 years now been with the two kids and the guy had since then neglected her her and not even bothered about his kids; mind you, there was never a legal marriage between the two of them.
Now on my own part, I was a virgin when I met her. So she was the one who disvirgined me and we had intimated a couple number of times of course we felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it cos it was very wrong of us. I really do love her though and she loves me, there were sometimes on three different occasions we had to break up cos I felt I couldn't go ahead with the marriage, but she falls terribly sick in the process and I myself I couldn't handle the feeling cos I always miss her. So we make up again
My pastor doesn't see anything wrong in our getting married but advises we pray really hard about it. Now, I'm quite worried the kind of resistance my family members will put up if I bring that type of lady for marriage cos there this lady ive been dating for years, she happens to be a virgin, so there was nothing intimate. I think I lover her too but not as strong as what I feel for the single mum.
She kind of broke up with me saying she needed time for herself and education, so I let her be. It was in the process I met the single mum. But we are still good friends, we talk, we laugh gist and all..... Baba, dont you dare it o. There is more to marriage than love. Love is not enough reason to get married. The two kids will have strong negative impact on you forever. I have been in your shoes once, she had one child but had to borrow myself brain.....PLEASE, DONT DO THIS TO YOUURSELF. She will get a single father to love her more 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by bodejohn(m): 6:17pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
tensazangetsu20:
It's not about having an abortion or not. That woman doesn't love the op. She still feels something strong for the first guy that's why she got pregnant for him twice. He's just second fiddle. I don't enjoy judging people when I have not met them or pretended to be in their shoes. You possibly can not say for sure that the lady is still in love with the father of her children. The decision to marry or not to rests with both of them and the consequences of their actions and inactions. 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by forexbinary: 6:26pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
menix:
Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured yet she is so loose to ve 2kids out of wedlock abi God-fearing no dey reach the pant region..
Dude carry on with what rocks ur boat afterall Loff is blind. Onye uwa mmebi  1 Like |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by AmazingElla(f): 6:28pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Lolx  all these church brothers claiming God fearing never seize to amaze me.. That how I met one that is claiming minister, he even had communion and communion wine in his fridge yet he was trying to sleep with me barely two days we met claiming he love me  as if that is an automatic ticket to sex. I just dey shake my head.. To the topic, op, your life is your own no one is going to live with her but you.. Search your heart and find the answer therein. |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by ipobarecriminals: 6:29pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
@ desine1Some single mum are better by far than some single lady.They aren't indomie type.I believe she's a home keeper and she'll take good care of u.Dnt eat her ponmo and give us one useless excuse.Wish u well 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by ade712: 6:36pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Pvssy is fucking ur brain...  Leave single mothers for single fathers... A word is enough for the wise!!! |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Zirah: 6:37pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Mehn. That woman of yours is loose. Better don't trust her. Two kids out of wedlock and she's still knacking you? destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.... |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by jpphilips(m): 6:39pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.
So we got really close, talking and started dating, it was then I discovered she had had two kids before, I couldn't believe my ears.
From her explanation, she really had a very rough past. she was dating a guy she really doesn't love.
After having a kid for him, they separated due to some reasons; then 2 years forward the guy came back begging, she agreed and then the second kid came.
Few years going forward, things really got nasty. The guy impregnated two other ladies, making her very depressed and frustrated. So she left him and had since over 7 years now been with the two kids and the guy had since then neglected her her and not even bothered about his kids; mind you, there was never a legal marriage between the two of them.
Now on my own part, I was a virgin when I met her. So she was the one who disvirgined me and we had intimated a couple number of times of course we felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it cos it was very wrong of us. I really do love her though and she loves me, there were sometimes on three different occasions we had to break up cos I felt I couldn't go ahead with the marriage, but she falls terribly sick in the process and I myself I couldn't handle the feeling cos I always miss her. So we make up again
My pastor doesn't see anything wrong in our getting married but advises we pray really hard about it. Now, I'm quite worried the kind of resistance my family members will put up if I bring that type of lady for marriage cos there this lady ive been dating for years, she happens to be a virgin, so there was nothing intimate. I think I lover her too but not as strong as what I feel for the single mum.
She kind of broke up with me saying she needed time for herself and education, so I let her be. It was in the process I met the single mum. But we are still good friends, we talk, we laugh gist and all..... Your pastor indirectly told you,, "bros, I won't do that if I were you", you are actually thinking with your pr!ck. 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by cegxie(m): 6:40pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Follow your heart.... the rest will fall in place |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by AjiChris(f): 6:50pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
I wouldnt adv.to marry d single mother...since d other lady said she needs attentn 4 her education,i think yhu shud move forward...search more |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Bigsteveg(m): 6:50pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
How sure are you that she us telling you the truth surrounding her past. Don't rush, take your time to know her more. Your pastor is not the one to live with her forever [b][/b] destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.
So we got really close, talking and started dating, it was then I discovered she had had two kids before, I couldn't believe my ears.
From her explanation, she really had a very rough past. she was dating a guy she really doesn't love.
After having a kid for him, they separated due to some reasons; then 2 years forward the guy came back begging, she agreed and then the second kid came.
Few years going forward, things really got nasty. The guy impregnated two other ladies, making her very depressed and frustrated. So she left him and had since over 7 years now been with the two kids and the guy had since then neglected her her and not even bothered about his kids; mind you, there was never a legal marriage between the two of them.
Now on my own part, I was a virgin when I met her. So she was the one who disvirgined me and we had intimated a couple number of times of course we felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it cos it was very wrong of us. I really do love her though and she loves me, there were sometimes on three different occasions we had to break up cos I felt I couldn't go ahead with the marriage, but she falls terribly sick in the process and I myself I couldn't handle the feeling cos I always miss her. So we make up again
My pastor doesn't see anything wrong in our getting married but advises we pray really hard about it. Now, I'm quite worried the kind of resistance my family members will put up if I bring that type of lady for marriage cos there this lady ive been dating for years, she happens to be a virgin, so there was nothing intimate. I think I lover her too but not as strong as what I feel for the single mum.
She kind of broke up with me saying she needed time for herself and education, so I let her be. It was in the process I met the single mum. But we are still good friends, we talk, we laugh gist and all..... |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by 9cbaby(f): 6:52pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
alexistaiwo:
I did not bother to read your epistle because your coming here to seek validation shows that you are not matured and responsible enough to make life decisions on your own.
If you are advised to marry and it works out well.
It is for your benefit alone (abi you want to share her with us)
And if it doesn't work out
It is your cross, you will carry it alone.
So please Bros. Search your heart well.
Therein lies your answer.
Rant over I think he is only asking for an advice and not insult,if you have nothing good to offer him you can keep quite and stop the insult. |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by menix(m): 6:56pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
forexbinary:
Onye uwa mmebi Nna Nawa oo, u sabi me reach house.. |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by oyejideogunjumo: 6:58pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.
So we got really close, talking and started dating, it was then I discovered she had had two kids before, I couldn't believe my ears.
From her explanation, she really had a very rough past. she was dating a guy she really doesn't love.
After having a kid for him, they separated due to some reasons; then 2 years forward the guy came back begging, she agreed and then the second kid came.
Few years going forward, things really got nasty. The guy impregnated two other ladies, making her very depressed and frustrated. So she left him and had since over 7 years now been with the two kids and the guy had since then neglected her her and not even bothered about his kids; mind you, there was never a legal marriage between the two of them.
Now on my own part, I was a virgin when I met her. So she was the one who disvirgined me and we had intimated a couple number of times of course we felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it cos it was very wrong of us. I really do love her though and she loves me, there were sometimes on three different occasions we had to break up cos I felt I couldn't go ahead with the marriage, but she falls terribly sick in the process and I myself I couldn't handle the feeling cos I always miss her. So we make up again
My pastor doesn't see anything wrong in our getting married but advises we pray really hard about it. Now, I'm quite worried the kind of resistance my family members will put up if I bring that type of lady for marriage cos there this lady ive been dating for years, she happens to be a virgin, so there was nothing intimate. I think I lover her too but not as strong as what I feel for the single mum.
She kind of broke up with me saying she needed time for herself and education, so I let her be. It was in the process I met the single mum. But we are still good friends, we talk, we laugh gist and all..... Although u have started on a wrong note wt d issue of premarital sex bt spuhgt that out wt God. It is not bad to marry her if truly u love each other.U are to live d rest of ur lives together so the two of u matter most. She is sincere to tell the truth.Bt u nees to agree where the children wl stay.They are not ur children bt they are her own children she must have emotional attachment wt them which may affect the relationship if not handled well. Bear in mind they wl b older than ur own children and in way may control their mother later in life positively or negatively. So many things has to be considered an if all are fixed well,ok 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by ejigbo(m): 7:01pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
alexistaiwo:
I did not bother to read your epistle because your coming here to seek validation shows that you are not matured and responsible enough to make life decisions on your own.
If you are advised to marry and it works out well.
It is for your benefit alone (abi you want to share her with us)
And if it doesn't work out
It is your cross, you will carry it alone.
So please Bros. Search your heart well.
Therein lies your answer.
Rant over Is this 1 ok?  alexistaiwo:
I did not bother to read your epistle because your coming here to seek validation shows that you are not matured and responsible enough to make life decisions on your own.
If you are advised to marry and it works out well.
It is for your benefit alone (abi you want to share her with us)
And if it doesn't work out
It is your cross, you will carry it alone.
So please Bros. Search your heart well.
Therein lies your answer.
Rant over Is this 1 ok? |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Divinerace(m): 7:06pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Billyonaire:
It is not the love I am worried about. It is how you intend to raise 2 kids for a man who does not give a damn and in the next few years you do not have the finances to see your DNA through. Love is cool, but love is not a dependable energy, it flows in and out and fractures your mind.
When making a decision, eliminate Love out of the equation and look at the situation without the coloration of love.
Love is a bonus in marriage, but not the yardstick. What you should be concerned about is if she is your Soul tie, if not, you might just be fighting a different battle which is much more than physical, and Love will be the first thing to jump out of the window and you will see a woman with two grown kids giving you and your little kids-to-come upper-cut, left-right and center.
I repeat, take love out of the equation and review the relationship with a different periscope.
You will feel that same sensation for another lady and even more. There is no reason to marry on an account of Love.
Always allow love to be the bonus.
At the moment, make no promises.
Just let her know, time will tell
What becomes of you,
and her.
Bye. how can you knw ur soul tie? |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Nobody: 7:13pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Divinerace:
how can you knw ur soul tie? To have a successful, happy, loving and perfect marriage without drama, both souls must originate from same constellation and star system and if possible, have same Soul mission on Earth. When such twin soul pillars meet, their marriage is heaven on Earth. |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Nobody: 7:14pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
@OP  iI BET THESE WILL BE THE FUTURE THREADS FROM OP IN SOME YEARS: HELLLPPP I was advised to marry a single mother of two and i regret it!!!and Never marry a single mother if you like your life |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by sirusX(m): 7:14pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
menix:
Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured yet she is so loose to ve 2kids out of wedlock abi God-fearing no dey reach the pant region..
Dude carry on with what rocks ur boat afterall Loff is blind. I tire ooo Naija don dey used to default yarns...na why people dey always say am as description evrytime Today na selfless, God fearing and down to earth...tomorrow na tall, dark and beautiful |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Nobody: 7:22pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
menix:
Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured yet she is so loose to ve 2kids out of wedlock abi God-fearing no dey reach the pant region..
Dude carry on with what rocks ur boat afterall Loff is blind. When will you marry? This year or next year? Menini |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by jyomite(m): 7:29pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
destinel:
Hi guys, I seriously need your opinion on this matter. Please take your time to go through my story:
I came in contact with this single mother of two kids in my church. This lady has every good character you want in a potential wife. Shes so selfless, God-fearing, down to earth, caring, very matured and willing to die for my love.
So we got really close, talking and started dating, it was then I discovered she had had two kids before, I couldn't believe my ears.
From her explanation, she really had a very rough past. she was dating a guy she really doesn't love.
After having a kid for him, they separated due to some reasons; then 2 years forward the guy came back begging, she agreed and then the second kid came.
Few years going forward, things really got nasty. The guy impregnated two other ladies, making her very depressed and frustrated. So she left him and had since over 7 years now been with the two kids and the guy had since then neglected her her and not even bothered about his kids; mind you, there was never a legal marriage between the two of them.
Now on my own part, I was a virgin when I met her. So she was the one who disvirgined me and we had intimated a couple number of times of course we felt guilty, remorseful and sorry for it cos it was very wrong of us. I really do love her though and she loves me, there were sometimes on three different occasions we had to break up cos I felt I couldn't go ahead with the marriage, but she falls terribly sick in the process and I myself I couldn't handle the feeling cos I always miss her. So we make up again
My pastor doesn't see anything wrong in our getting married but advises we pray really hard about it. Now, I'm quite worried the kind of resistance my family members will put up if I bring that type of lady for marriage cos there this lady ive been dating for years, she happens to be a virgin, so there was nothing intimate. I think I lover her too but not as strong as what I feel for the single mum.
She kind of broke up with me saying she needed time for herself and education, so I let her be. It was in the process I met the single mum. But we are still good friends, we talk, we laugh gist and all..... Run....Man. My best advice. 1) Have u sat down to ask yourself ''is this what I want for myself?'' 2) Family is everything. Blood is thicker, even at your explanation above, don't take your pastor's advice as the overall best. Talk to your parents and older ones in the marriage circle. Try to listen and ponder on what they say. 3) Do not based this on mere She is good in bed, good in the drill. Study her true character, you can't just have 2 kids for the past seven years and no past. 4) Are the kids of the same father? Think about all this, because it's a coincidence we share the same story. But I know best 5) Pray.......... 2 Likes |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Cherlene(f): 7:39pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
bodejohn:
We are in the days where deceit is celebrated and truth is scorned...
Imagine that the lady had aborted the pregnancies of those children, most of the folks talking above would have fallen head over heels with her...not knowing her past. But since she chose to live with the consequences of her actions...we jump to call her names...even though we might be worse than her.
OP, if your story is true, I pity that you came to NL to seek for opinions...you must be blaming yourself for that already.
My own opinion about single mums, I prefer a lady who is open with her past...a lady who chose to face the consequences of her actions than the one who had covered adultery and fornication with blue cold blood murder. Nothing but THE TRUTH.
Cherlene |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Runx: 7:40pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Destinel, I noticed that You no longer reply to comments to guide opinions, are You angered and probably bitten more than can chew? Let me poke your conscience a bit.
1. You seem to be economical​ with truths in your situation. 2. This woman of yours is older than You, She has a stable job, a car, house and kids. She also helps financially as appropriate right? 3. How does she refer to the father of her kids? Is it always in the negatives. 4. Have You noticed any over bearing positive attitudes towards you and your relatives and yet try to hide another version of herself that you realize to your regrets? 5. Why did the father of her kids leave, men may be crazy sometimes but not stupid. Destinel, I shall be encouraged to share WISDOM with you when I read further comments from you.
I always advice this; Walk away!
It cost you nothing! 2 Likes 1 Share |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Fernandowski(m): 7:42pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
BasketballGURU:
She's an H.O.D in church, yet she's so "loose"
So rueful  bro. how did you add the color on your signature?? Pls teach me.... I am a baller too...... you can call me shaq 1 Like |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Nobody: 7:44pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
ejigbo:
Is this 1 ok?
Is this 1 ok?
Are you supposed to be taking life decisions for a grown man? |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Nobody: 7:45pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
9cbaby:
I think he is only asking for an advice and not insult,if you have nothing good to offer him you can keep quite and stop the insult. A 29 year old man asking this type of question?! |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by chachazzy(m): 7:45pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Please take a chill pill before you leap, I know what you are going through now, trust me, but you just have to calm down. Forget the things you might be seeing now/enjoying. It is quite a long journey bro
Just calm down please. 
|
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by yeye142: 7:48pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
we ladies sha, u av two kids ,d father of ur kids disappointed u ,and u ar here searchg for another love, ur kids shld b ur permanent spouse for now,to d guy,u ar still an infant. |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by Ishilove: 7:48pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
alexistaiwo:
I did not bother to read your epistle because your coming here to seek validation shows that you are not matured and responsible enough to make life decisions on your own.
If you are advised to marry and it works out well.
It is for your benefit alone (abi you want to share her with us)
And if it doesn't work out
It is your cross, you will carry it alone.
So please Bros. Search your heart well.
Therein lies your answer.
Rant over Alexis darling, once upon a time you believed in romance. What happened? |
| Re: Should I Marry This Single Mother? by sweetilicious(f): 7:51pm On Apr 12, 2017 |
Tokziby:
Life is what u make out of it.
Marriage is not how far but how well u can tolerate each others short comings regardless of what the future holds.
There is no difference in marrying a virgin and non-virgin cos both of them are woman and they have their womanly traits though at different levels. What matters is the person u choose to spend the rest of ur life with and accept to take full responsibility the outcome after tying the knot.
You might go for a virgin and ur life become worse for it and vice versa.
But from my own point of view, i always say this, marry the person that cannot live without u and discard the one that u can live without. This is because u can tell when she truly loves u deeply from her actions, but u cannot know whether the one u love truly loves u back the way u did.
Why i said this, is that, u can always get best out of the one that cannot live without u, by her conforming to ur wants as she will do everything possible to keep u to herself. Based on what u stated, she already has two kids, thus she has a very slim chance of getting another single guy like u if u break up with her. Also with the current epidermic of "husbandless" single girls in the society, trust me she can get direct admission in 3rd mainland bridge if u decide to ditch her.
The ball is in ur court... Despite all i said, its still does not guarantee that she will give u a blissful life when u marry her, as animals cannot stop to exhibit their animalistic instinct so does a woman will never fail to exhibit their commotion traits.
Thats my 10 kobo.
God knows best... Exactly |
