As for me, i'd come from a Christian point of view, the Bible is very clear; "in the beginning, he made them Man and Woman" "therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife (not wives), and the two (not three nor four nor five) shall become one flesh" "the husband of one wife" 1Tim.3:2, and many other scriptures,

If you understand what true marriage is about then you'd appreciate why it has to be one man with one woman.

And as for those comparing polygamy, or polyandry with homosexuality; they are all evils. There is no point in looking for the lesser of two evils; wrong is wrong. Neither is right and both are frowned at in God's eyes.

By the way, its not even easy to nurture a marriage of two people, why try to complicate matters?

My dear o.
It is hard enough for a couple,why add others in the equation?

ricadelide:

As for me, i'd come from a Christian point of view, the Bible is very clear; "in the beginning, he made them Man and Woman" "therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife (not wives), and the two (not three nor four nor five) shall become one flesh" "the husband of one wife" 1Tim.3:2, and many other scriptures,

If you understand what true marriage is about then you'd appreciate why it has to be one man with one woman.

And as for those comparing polygamy, or polyandry with homosexuality; they are all evils. There is no point in looking for the lesser of two evils; wrong is wrong. Neither is right and both are frowned at in God's eyes.

By the way, its not even easy to nurture a marriage of two people, why try to complicate matters?

Yeah but many of the great men in the bible had more than one wife, how do you explain that ? No where in the bilble does it condem polygamy.

@Digiman, you got that right, been asking that same question for years.

Digiman:

Yeah but many of the great men in the bible had more than one wife, how do you explain that ? No where in the bilble does it condem polygamy.

in the old days, men were scarce. i mean actually physically scarce!
with all the wars they had to fight, armies of thousands of men went off to war and were slaughtered. The few men left were obliged to marry many women just so the human race could continue.
now we dont have that need. These days when we say men are scarce we kind of mean eligible men are scarce. so dont keep refering to old times when there was polygamy. in new testament God advocates one wife per man.

don't use the bible to justify the present day men polygamus nature.
if you understand the bible very well, you can see that most of them (wife) have one health problem or the other. who do you want to name? most are  just plain lust as in Solomon,

I believe every man should do the right thing and not sell your what's between your knee for a few minutes of pleasure. same pleasure you've been milking, stay with your better half for better or for worst. Both of you could move on from the marriage, then you can go sow your wild oat. not have 1 in the house, and go looking for monicas.

and for you gals, leave the occupied territory alone.  

Which type of bible were early Europeans and missionaries reading when they were trading and holding slaves? Which type of bible was Church of England using when it was deeply involved in slavery? Which type of bible was Catholic Church reading when Jews were massacred by Nazis? Which type of bible were slave traders reading in Elmina Castle -Ghana while holding slaves in dungeon? Which type of bible are most churches in the west reading that they cannot condemn homosexuality?

We really have to expand our horizon when it comes to religion and cultures. Are you telling me that my great grand father who practiced polygamy was evil; simply because you believe that your bible says so, even though Solomon married hundreds of women and God made him the wisest man on earth. We have to shift from this Eurocentric perspective of presenting historical facts. Jesus is depicted as a white man even though He was from Middle East. Nearly all the saints are white. Modern Christendom evolved from Roman Catholic church- with Roman Empire influenced teachings, and Canon Law is a creed of Catholic Church. Western laws are premised on Canon- Law.

i come from a planet where Grey does not exist, its either BLACK or WHITE. 4rm the last count i did, 65% of my friends are from polygamous set ups. most of them have their mums outside the matrimonial homes afta the poor women could take no more, yeah, the kids (my friends) look alrite on the outside, but internally they are really damaged and one confession they all have is that their kids must not go through the same. in polygamy, there the few cool moments, (even a mad man gets those moments) but everything else is perpetually damned.

as far as am concerned, it should be a crime to think about it!

@ikye D: wait till it happens to u then u'd know better!

adconline:

Which type of bible were early Europeans and missionaries reading when they were trading and holding slaves? Which type of bible was Church of England using when it was deeply involved in slavery? Which type of bible was Catholic Church reading when Jews were massacred by Nazis? Which type of bible were slave traders reading in Elmina Castle -Ghana while holding slaves in dungeon? Which type of bible are most churches in the west reading that they cannot condemn homosexuality?

We really have to expand our horizon when it comes to religion and cultures. Are you telling me that my great grand father who practiced polygamy was evil; simply because you believe that your bible says so, even though Solomon married hundreds of women and God made him the wisest man on earth. We have to shift from this Eurocentric perspective of presenting historical facts. Jesus is depicted as a white man even though He was from Middle East. Nearly all the saints are white. Modern Christendom evolved from Roman Catholic church- with Roman Empire influenced teachings, and Canon Law is a creed of Catholic Church. Western laws are premised on Canon- Law.

abeg stick to the topic,if you have issues with Chrisianity,we'll meet on the religious threads where your claims so far will be debunked.
If you need a second wife,go ahead,I'm sure some desperate girls with no esteem will oblige you.
We have heard the horrors of polygamy and I'm still waiting to hear the advantages from you.

horrors of polygamy supported and advanced by  west? people used  bible as their basis of argument , so I had to remind them of church's checkered pasts and inconsistencies  when it bothered on their morality. you maintain your posistion simply becuase you believe in western teachings, so that does not mean that it should be abhorred. South Easterners are most likely to tell you that polygamy is evil because Igbos destroyed all the traditional belief systems and adopted European religion as the only way to God.

adconline:

horrors of polygamy supported and advanced by  west? people used  bible as their basis of argument , so I had to remind them of church's checkered pasts and inconsistencies  when it bothered on their morality. you maintain your posistion simply becuase you believe in western teachings, so that does not mean that it should be abhorred. South Easterners are most likely to tell you that polygamy is evil because Igbos destroyed all the traditional belief systems and adopted European religion as the only way to God.

You have other serious issues beyond nairaland,first Christianity now South Easterners
Again tell us the advantages of polygamy or be silent.

lol, him want his 2 or more ladies,

ma sista the thing pass me o.
The man is just hyperventilating up and down as if babyosisi is shooing all his would be wives away.
In his native Okitipupa,I'm sure he is quite a catch

babyosisi:

ma sista the thing pass me o.
The man is just hyperventilating up and down as if babyosisi is shooing all his would be wives away.
In his native Okitipupa,I'm sure he is quite a catch

just wanted to say i enjoy your posts

babyosisi:

ma sista the thing pass me o.
The man is just hyperventilating up and down as if babyosisi is shooing all his would be wives away.
In his native Okitipupa,I'm sure he is quite a catch

probably. with plenty women all over him like hot honey. every man's nasty fantasy!  

yeah, that's y ladies in their lives or out there are teaching them a lesson or two but you what they never learn

i am against polygamy , breeds in many cases hatred, unhealthy competition, inequality, insecurity, selfishness, can anyone tell i am from such a family yet?

ultrafem,thanks for the kind words.

ultrafem:

i am against polygamy , breeds in many cases hatred, unhealthy competition, inequality, insecurity, selfishness, can anyone tell i am from such a family yet?

are you?

spoilt:

probably. with plenty women all over him like hot honey. every man's nasty fantasy!

lol,I doubt it,looks like we're putting sound in his garri

i am oooo babyosissi

To anyone supporting polygamy,

"Why fly no go support shit?"

Christino:

To anyone supporting polygamy,

"Why fly no go support shit?"

hehehehehe!

Babyosisi,
Why not stick to the topic instead of  insinuating that I got issues with Christianity. I reminded folks who used bible as their basis of argument that someone read the same bible and acted to the contrary.
On the other hand, I am of the opinion that western ideology should mot serve as a yardstick for measuring what is good or bad. Does it mean that Muslims who practice polygamy are evil and do not have any benefit? Does it mean that some Nepalese who practice polyandry are wrong? But remember that there is a culture where a woman shares several men. –polyandry. We ve got to stop this idea of defining right or wrong from Billy O’Reilly’s perspective. Is there any science to show that polygamous marriages fare less? 

Here are some of the benefits of marriage.
It serves as agent of procreation.
It serves as an agent of socialization.
Society building, Work Force development, Family etc

Polygamy fits into these aforementioned conditions.  You are trying to tie polygamy to harzards that might have been created by monogamous relationships.  If you tell me that you have imbibed western perspective  (Meology) Me and myself, Me and my family, then polygamy may be the  worst thing ever. Do promiscuous couples keep to this monogamous rule of one man, one woman?  People in the west are living polygamously when they are involved with more than one person; the law only allows them to be married to one person at a time. Most people are not doing this on their own volition,   but because the law will not allow them.  Monogamous people go around the law to mate other people which is not against the law, but could be viewed as polygamy.  This is shear hypocrisy.

adconline:

Babyosisi,
Why not stick to the topic instead of insinuating that I got issues with Christianity. I reminded folks who used bible as their basis of argument that someone read the same bible and acted to the contrary.
On the other hand, I am of the opinion that western ideology should mot serve as a yardstick for measuring what is good or bad. Does it mean that Muslims who practice polygamy are evil and do not have any benefit? Does it mean that some Nepalese who practice polyandry are wrong? But remember that there is a culture where a woman shares several men. –polyandry. We ve got to stop this idea of defining right or wrong from Billy O’Reilly’s perspective. Is there any science to show that polygamous marriages fare less?

Here are some of the benefits of marriage.
It serves as agent of procreation.
It serves as an agent of socialization.
Society building, Work Force development, Family etc

Polygamy fits into these aforementioned conditions. You are trying to tie polygamy to harzards that might have been created by monogamous relationships. If you tell me that you have imbibed western perspective (Meology) Me and myself, Me and my family, then polygamy may the worst thing ever. Do promiscuous couples keep to this monogamous rule of one man, one woman? People in the west are living polygamously when they are involved with more than one person; the law only allows them to be married to one person at a time. Most people are not doing this on their own volition, but because the law will not allow them. Monogamous people go around the law to mate other people which is not against the law, but could be viewed as polygamy. This is shear hypocrisy.

Right on track, but what I see as polygamy is not just getting married/having babies by two women but dating someone else when your wife isn't dead! When a man divorces his wife and marries another, people say he's not polygamous but what i mean by monogamy is "BEING STUCK!". The more youths realise the urgent need to try as much as possible to have all of their kids from only one partner, the better, read my siggy

Polygamy simply means a man nyashing different women.

@Babyosisi.
Maybe sister il help you understand this.

Most men, unless he has real strong religious reasons to leash himself, have that inner desire to sleep with different women. Its not neccesarilly about who he loves. Men dont connect love and sex. That is why men in the past could marry 70 women and be nyashing all of them without even remembering their names.

Apart from Christinan perspective Polygamy is a serious trouble, even despite some religion approval. morden day women cannot cohabit, if one has headache it is from the other woman, even if the other woman does not know anything, friend and relatives will always find means of influencing women and trust them they are emotional being they are easily subject to anger, hate and so on and so forth.
So many of us complaing about polygammy still go around with mistress and girl friends, despite the fact that we are married, is that not hypocrisy, may be that is why Islam allows more than one wives

To all you lovers of polygamy,has many wives eliminated the need for extramarital affairs?
The answer is no.
If the man can be satisfied by 2 why "marry" 3 and 4 and 5?
When does the satisfaction factor kick in
Adconline your argument holds no water.
.
It is a natural human instinct for a woman to not want to share her bed with several others.
It is dirty
It is unhygenic
It breeds diseases
It is yucky

You keep mentioning african culture.
Culture evolves,African culture has undergone changes too.
It was our culture to wear leaves and no bra.
It was our culture to live in thatched houses.
It was once our culture to kill twins
It was also our culture to have girls bethroted at birth.

If the multiple sleeping partners called 'wives' is one culture you dying to preserve,good luck.
Don't speak for Muslims,many decent Muslims have one wife,in some Muslim countries,the law forbids more than one wife,in case you don't know.

It is commonsense that everywoman would prefer to have her husband to herself.
I get mad when you,a man would stand and tell a woman what to accept when it is of no benefit to her or soceity.
If you need hands to labor in your farm rather than marry more wives,hire hands and pay them wages.
We are overpopulated as it is.
For socialization,join a club not make more babies.

Your argument in support of polygamy has no advantage except to the promiscous male that wants to jump from bed to bed.

babyosisis

Has monogamy stopped promiscuity? Nope. Let's hold all types of marriages to the same standard and you will see that none is supreme. I have never mentioned African in all my posts since polygamy and polyandry go beyond African culture.

If we go by your argument that monogamy is the best form of marriage: why do so many monogamous couples go outside the rules of monogamy to enjoy polygamy? About 50% of marriages that end in divorce are caused by infidelity in the US. If marriage is a union of a man and woman, why does the west accept gay unions?
May be you don’t know that there are more monogamous relationships than polygamous relationships, which implies that infidelity is highly prevalent among monogamous couples. Monogamous infidelity breeds more diseases and unwanted children than polygamous relationships.

You are looking at monogamy from an idealistic perspective instead of looking at it from a realistic perspective, that's why people say for better for worse when they don’t mean it. And you are telling me it's the best thing when people test run marriages- thinking that if it does not work, we get a divorce. Ok if we say to the West, you should stick to your vow - for better for worse-, they say that we are intolerant and uncivilized.

I even met a single mom of four kids from four different men who had the effrontery to frown at polygamy. Wait a minute; it’s acceptable in the west to have as many kids as possible outside wedlock while polygamy is a crime? What do U call people who are in a multiple relationship? You have a lot of women who double date and it becomes a crime when people want to get married. If you define polygamy as a man having sexual relationship with multiple women, many men are guilty of this and so are women who are sexually involved with more than one man.

In Nigerian universities, most girls have school boyfriends who satisfy their sexual, emotion and physical needs and at the same have business and working class men or married men who meet their financial needs.

NB: You have tactfully avoided my reference to polyandry- one woman, several men. I hope you put men who are engaged in this type of union as a people whose rights are also violated in your subsequent post.

See this thing depends. E.g if you got a baby mama that wont go and ur not really happy leaving with her, but you love her kid and she's automatically taking the position of a wive though their is no marriage yet. And she wont leave!!!! Thats my case here!

So I plan having a real marriage with someone abroad. And that way they're thousand miles away, no fighting, no and that way they might not even get to meet each other physically. And that way I wont be up hangin out with some gurlz I dont really wanna hang out with and get married someone I'm happy with . I spend 6months in Naija and another 6 in Uk. I just find a way to share the time .

as long as there are Hot rich men and lazy beautiful women , third world countries will have polygamy
western countries will have (for want of a better description) ' trading in the old wife for a trophy model' .

when u think of the financial implications of divorce ( child support, alimony,et al) i suspect most western men would opt for polygamy.am not supporting, just passing comments.

adconline:

babyosisis

Has monogamy stopped promiscuity? Nope. Let's hold all types of marriages to the same standard and you will see that none is supreme. I have never mentioned African in all my posts since polygamy and polyandry go beyond African culture.

So if both monogamy and polygamy have not stopped promiscuity why continue polygamy?
was polygamy meant to be a solution to the insatiable male appetite?
Promiscuity is another issue all together which is wrong ,a man ought to be faithful to his one wife.

as for African culture,I have quoted you on several of them,this is another incase you forgot what you said.

Has  monogamy stopped promiscuity? Nope. Has monogamy stopped STD's  Nope. So, what's the  fuzz about  encouraging infidelity? We are leaving on borrowed concept of marriage. Before colonization, Africans had their marriage institutions.Monogamy was introduced in Nigeria by our colonial masters- British

adconline:

babyosisis

If we go by your argument that monogamy is the best form of marriage: why do so many monogamous couples go outside the rules of monogamy to enjoy polygamy? About 50% of marriages that end in divorce are caused by infidelity in the US. If marriage is a union of a man and woman, why does the west accept gay unions?

You are not being sincere.
Are polygmous men immuned from cheating? or it's not called cheating since they already have more than one wife.
Statistics show that monetary concerns are one of the chief causes of divorce.
Infidelity is also high up there,is the man cheating because he is an unfaithful spouse or because he is stuck in a monogamous relationship?
I don't understand your argument here.

In Nigerian universities, most girls have school boyfriends   who satisfy their sexual, emotion and physical needs and at the same have business and working class men or married men who meet their financial needs.

what is the point of this,are you saying that all these men participating in this sinful act are doing so because they are monogamous or you are confrming that monogamy is of no use since men still cheat?

NB: You have tactfully avoided my reference to polyandry- one woman, several men. I hope you put men who are engaged in this type of union as a people whose rights are also violated in your subsequent post.

this is not a major issue in the world anywhere,it is practised by a negligible minority,not the case in my soceity and not worth spending time on.
I wonder why men who practise polygamy don't allow their wives the right to polyandry to run concurrently.

I

even met a single mom of four kids from four different men who had the effrontery to frown at polygamy. Wait a minute; it’s acceptable in the west to have as many kids as possible outside wedlock while polygamy is a crime?  What do U call people who are in a multiple relationship?  You have a lot of women who double date and it becomes a crime when people want to get married.  If you define polygamy as a man           ual relationship with multiple women, many men are guilty of this and so are women who are sexually involved with more than one man.

It is a soceital ill to have children outside of wedlock,it is however not a crime punishable by death and stoning,it has never been preferred to the normal way of doing things.
It should be criminal to marry 2 women at the same time and divorcing one to marry another at the drop of a hat may be signs of the general soceital decay but is not the same as a man having several women in the house at the same time under the guise of marriage when we know all he's doing is satifying a perverted sexual drive.

adconline,you have tried so hard to degenerate this into a religious argument but I have carefully avoided going that route.
Asking why the Church did this,Igbos did that,divorce rate is 50% in America and America sanctions gay marriage is beyond the subject of this thread.
As a Christian,my Bible forbids gay marriage and that is my stand and that's all I'll say on that.

You cannot say anything to convince any girl with a little brain in her head in this day and age that a polygamous marriage is her calling especially one that has a freedom of choice.

The ills in the west and American soceity are numerous but an ill like polygamy is still not a preferred ill.
No young girl fantasizes in her head to be married one day to a 50 year old with several other wives.It is unnatural.
That the woman keeps quiet and says nothing does not mean she's enjoying that sleeping arrangement,in most cases it's because she has no other choice.