Considering the rate of domestic violence everywhere, what should a man do when his wife refuses to cook, take care of the children and other house chores.
Husband is financially buoyant, provides for the home, enough house help and ever ready to support the wife. All the wife wants is to party, visit friends at the expense of her family.

Hubby has discussed these severally but no changes.

What should he do? DV not an option.

1. Talk to her, let her know the harm she's doing to her home
2.pray for her
3. Show her love
4. Correct her with love
5. Do somethings by yourself, clean the house, bathe the children, spend time with them infact when she comes home take her clothes off and bathe her

She'd get the message
Domestic abuse doesn't solve issues it only makes things worse

He don buy market... Let him report her to her parents. Which kan behavior be that nau.

I don't know what you saw in her that made you Marry her. Focus on the good traits she has and magnify her great abilities. Her weak areas like you mentioned. Lead by example, take care of your children, show them love like mad. I believe with time and God on your side she will learn one or two things from you and change.

As for the partying aspect I think you should try to plan family outings. Your post is not really detailed so we can't really say a lot. Who knows maybe you are an introvert who likes staying indoor and she's the opposite. So instead encourage family outings.

Lastly, communication! Express your concerns to her and also pray for her.

biggestbros:
Considering the rate of domestic violence everywhere, what should a man do when his wife refuses to cook, take care of the children and other house chores.
Husband is financially buoyant, provides for the home, enough house help and ever ready to support the wife. All the wife wants is to party, visit friends at the expense of her family.

Hubby has discussed these severally but no changes.

What should he do? DV not an option.

biggestbros:
Considering the rate of domestic violence everywhere, what should a man do when his wife refuses to cook, take care of the children and other house chores.
Husband is financially buoyant, provides for the home, enough house help and ever ready to support the wife. All the wife wants is to party, visit friends at the expense of her family.

Hubby has discussed these severally but no changes.

What should he do? DV not an option.

During courtship didn't he discover all these traits ? After much talks without results ,take to God in prayers

That's what u get when u pick beauty over brains. To even call her deficient shows that u hav a problem urself. Can't you find a less derogatory adjective? Did u not meet more homely girls when u were younger? Are u not cheating on her? Go and sit down joor!

2SWT:
1. Talk to her, let her know the harm she's doing to her home
2.pray for her
3. Show her love
4. Correct her with love
5. Do somethings by yourself, clean the house, bathe the children, spend time with them infact when she comes home take her clothes off and bathe her

She'd get the message
Domestic abuse doesn't solve issues it only makes things worse

Dear OP....pls in the name of whatever you worship..... Do not ever take this comment to heart....ignore this comment...take it as the rambling of a frustrated Nigerian......this comment shows the poster is one of the problems of Nigeria.

coolcatty:


Dear OP....pls in the name of whatever you worship..... Do not ever take this comment to heart....ignore this comment...take it as the rambling of a frustrated Nigerian......this comment shows the poster is one of the problems of Nigeria.

What's wrong with the comment?
If it were to be the other way
Won't same advice be given?

2SWT:
1. Talk to her, let her know the harm she's doing to her home
2.pray for her
3. Show her love
4. Correct her with love
5. Do somethings by yourself, clean the house, bathe the children, spend time with them infact when she comes home take her clothes off and bathe her

She'd get the message
Domestic abuse doesn't solve issues it only makes things worse

interesting...

2SWT:
1. Talk to her, let her know the harm she's doing to her home
2.pray for her
3. Show her love
4. Correct her with love
5. Do somethings by yourself, clean the house, bathe the children, spend time with them infact when she comes home take her clothes off and bathe her

She'd get the message
Domestic abuse doesn't solve issues it only makes things worse

OP do exactly what this woman says.

Now isn't the best time to beat up a woman, the whole of the country is looking for woman beaters lol, campaigning everywhere. Don't get popular on newspapers because of domestic violence dude.

coolcatty:


Dear OP....pls in the name of whatever you worship..... Do not ever take this comment to heart....ignore this comment...take it as the rambling of a frustrated Nigerian......this comment shows the poster is one of the problems of Nigeria.

your comment shows you're one of those women beaters

Remember if you beat a woman, somebody will beat your daughter ( maybe right before your eyes) so you'd know how it feels.
Women pass through alot of stress naturally they deserve nothing but love no matter what Domestic violence doesn't solve any problem it only makes things worse

Dyt:


What's wrong with the comment?
If it were to be the other way
Won't same advice be given?

I tire oh

2SWT:
1. Talk to her, let her know the harm she's doing to her home
2.pray for her
3. Show her love
4. Correct her with love
5. Do somethings by yourself, clean the house, bathe the children, spend time with them infact when she comes home take her clothes off and bathe her

She'd get the message
Domestic abuse doesn't solve issues it only makes things worse

You mean, a man (husband) should teach a wife how to take care of her own children? Parties and friends over the children she carried each for 9-10 months?


OP, no doubt you've mis-married. Slay queens hardly change. They party even in their '70s.

Acidosis:


You mean, a man (husband) should teach a wife how to take care of her own children? Parties and friends over the children she carried each for 9-10 months?


OP, no doubt you've mis-married. Slay queens hardly change. They party even in their '70s.

Don't women teach men (husbands) how to take care of their kids? Kids that were formed by their own sperm.
Yes, care giving is innate in women, but some lack it. Same way some men lack provisional and headship qualities.

You can only guide such a person to the right path or do away with him or her.

How did you end up with her in the first place?
Abeg carry your cross!

pocohantas:

Don't women teach men (husbands) how to take care of their kids? Kids that were formed by their own sperm.
Yes, care giving is innate in women, but some lack it. Same way some men lack provisional and headship qualities.

You can only guide such a person to the right path or do away with him or her.

This is ridiculous


So what would your advice be for a woman whose husband doesn't care, provide, head rightly and only go out with friends to party, sometimes, weekends in hotels, etc.?

I hope you will advise such a woman to teach her irresponsible husband ways of making money, business skills, how to love, how to stay at home, etc., at the detriment of her own daily job?


@OP, since your wife has proven to be irresponsible in her home, I'd advice you to terminate the services of maids/helps. Your pikin no go die, withdraw them from the school and hand them over to your mom in the village.

she will be your childrens role model. correct her now

I think you all skipped the part where OP said he has talked to her several times

@Op, ignore her totally
She will think you are up to something and she might change but ignoring her didn't work I dunno what will work again

2SWT:
your comment shows you're one of those women beaters

Remember if you beat a woman, somebody will beat your daughter ( maybe right before your eyes) so you'd know how it feels.
Women pass through alot of stress naturally they deserve nothing but love no matter what Domestic violence doesn't solve any problem it only makes things worse

Do you mean that the women who have been beaten by their husbands/men had fathers who beat their mothers/women?

Acidosis:

This is ridiculous


So what would your advice be for a woman whose husband doesn't care, provide, head rightly and only go out with friends to party, sometimes, weekends in hotels, etc.?

I hope you will advise such a woman to teach her irresponsible husband ways of making money, business skills, how to love, how to stay at home, etc., at the detriment of her own daily job?


@OP, since your wife has proven to be irresponsible in her home, I'd advice you to terminate the services of maids/helps. Your pikin no go die, withdraw them from the school and hand them over to your mom in the village.

What a childish comment, I used to think you were more than this, that advice you to someone in business section on photography was good but this one is a disaster. Stick to business advice

OP, do you think you can beat your wife into submission? I doubt you are saying the entire truth. How can she be lacking in all those areas, indeed you have exaggerated things.

You have no other option but to patiently help her address the aspects she is lacking in or report her to her mother who will definitely put her on the right track, take care

Alennsar:
she will be your childrens role model. correct her now

How?

What other ways can she be corrected?

Pidgin2:


What a childish comment, I used to think you were more than this, that advice you to someone in business section on photography was good but this one is a disaster. Stick to business advice

OP, do you think you can beat your wife into submission? I doubt you are saying the entire truth. How can she be lacking in all those areas, indeed you have exaggerated things.

You have no other option but to patiently help her address the aspects she is lacking in or report her to her mother who will definitely put her on the right track, take care

I will look out for your posts on deficient men, henceforth.


Enjoy your Sunday Pidgin2

biggestbros:
How?
What other ways can she be corrected?

you need to man up but don't beat her o. you just have to be strict.

Exercise your authority over her. If she fails to change, tell her to visit her parents for I month and within that period, transform your home. All those things she refuses to do, do them exceptionally well. When she comes back, make sure she continues with them. Never shortchange your authority as the man in the house

2SWT:
your comment shows you're one of those women beaters

Remember if you beat a woman, somebody will beat your daughter ( maybe right before your eyes) so you'd know how it feels.
Women pass through alot of stress naturally they deserve nothing but love no matter what Domestic violence doesn't solve any problem it only makes things worse

Most of you young ones just write sentimental jargons here just to garner likes......this is a serious forum and a very serious issue is being discussed here.

How a sane human being will vomit your kind of advice in this situation beats my imagination.....

You are here advising someone to show love to a woman that cannot take care of her kids,take care of the home front etc...show love to a grossly useless woman that prefers partying etc to her family......a woman that cannot even go through her children's books when they return from schoool.....you expect the man to abdicate from his responsibilities and take over the woman's own in the interest of peace.......you are suspect and i honestly and genuinely pity your kids and spouse......you are lucky you are not married to someone like me.


The man should bath the kids tooo................such rubbish you young ones spew on this forum sha....

bigtalla:


Do you mean that the women who have been beaten by their husbands/men had fathers who beat their mothers/women?

you dey mind the slow girl.....see someone's logic in 2017.....................she is part of the problems of this country...see her level of thinking.

biggestbros:

How?

What other ways can she be corrected?

Oga give her ultimatum.....set a time frame for her to change and please make sure you keep to it..women have zero respect for men that blow hot air without seeing through their threats....if she doesn't change bundle her back to her people......change all the locks in your house and change the security man too...deny her all the privileges she enjoys...take away her car,pocket money etc..let her party all she wants in her fathers house....this life is too short to live with one defiant redundant woman.

Dyt:


What's wrong with the comment?
If it were to be the other way
Won't same advice be given?

Dyt,i always tell my wife...you can ignore me but please do not ignore our beloved...my wife is the best mom ever....i make bold to say it anywhere...i look at my beloved daughter and i marvel at the amount of care and love she receives everyday.....she has grown up to be super intelligent,beautiful and has a wonderful glowing skin texture...my wife takes immense care of all our Angel's academic,physical,nutritional,spiritual needs while i bear the financial aspect.....................i hate it when women neglect their kids and hand them to househelps.....it shows on the kids development.


OP sounds so weak...let him save his kids before it is too late.