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Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? - Family (4) - Nairaland

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Sparklee(m): 11:19pm On Jun 28, 2017
Take heart bro. Bros your wife own don too much. Na the same thing my uncle dey pass through. Before my uncle wife go open leg for my uncle na him be say my uncle don promise to buy shoes,clothes and Brazilian hair for her.

4 Likes

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by FreeSpirited: 11:19pm On Jun 28, 2017
You are so dumb. Where did you grow up? Who brought you up? Didn't you date girls all your life before this girl? Don't you roll with guys before marriage? Well, the only reason for all this dumbness and docility must be from your religious orientation...cos I heard you say 'one brainless brethren asked you to marry her".I don't have advice for you cos you have disgraced manhood in general..and I'm so pained reading your shameful story Carry your cross.
Maybe if you have enough sense to do DNA and discover those children or a couple of them arnt your children maybe you will get sense and act like a man.
If I may ask, were you castrated? I can't believe a man will shun his dignity and allow a woman to rule him in such a pititful manner. You are a castrated man!
I can place a bet that your wife has been fvcking different dicks all along. Women who have such mind and courage to control a wussy like you won't find it hard to please themselves with whichever diick they desire because, they see themselves as the boss while you are just a figure-head husband with no power or authority. She can never fear your or have respect for your marital vow. She gives her body to men out there who are man enough to make her feel like a woman, not the way you make her feel like the boss.
I don't just know why I'm angry at how a man could so ridicule her birthright as a man. You lost your manhood. Go and learn or start reading what it means to be a respected husband, what it means to be a man that women adore...cos you have no business with marriage with the way you are. Yet I still don't have advice for you.. Wait till she end your life, you will have sense by then

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by thunderbabs: 11:21pm On Jun 28, 2017
Ministry of women affairs on domestic abuse n violence will not come to this man's aid now ooo.....its only when d man beats d woman blue-black u will start to hear noise of war against domestic violence

Stupid association....As for the man, you don chop a specially made efo riro....

Ur wife is possessed to torment you....You being tormented.....Jah help you

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by rosalieene(f): 11:24pm On Jun 28, 2017
that woman needs real deliverance

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by enemyofprogress: 11:25pm On Jun 28, 2017
This is why is good to always have canes at home, flog sense into her head or kick her out. Na you dey make her treat you like mumu. Go and beat the hell out of her

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Abagworo(m): 11:27pm On Jun 28, 2017
Get rid of her instantly and marry a new wife. You deserve love and care with regular sex before you get old.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Guyman02: 11:27pm On Jun 28, 2017
lalanice:
I've read a similar story before, makes me feel this story is made up.

Not made up perhaps, I am facing near similar scenario and want to see matured opinion on the issue.
If you check the time I am reading and posting this is not because I want to be awake but because I spend a lot of time thinking, my wife is inconsiderate, my kids school fees is due, she has money but won't support and the responsibilities are much for me alone with meagre income etc

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Dicedpineapple(f): 11:27pm On Jun 28, 2017
U saw signs and u thought she would change?Y do ppl kip using dat line when things finally turn sour?A lesson to unmarried folks,me inclusive,never and i mean ever have dat line of thought..U dont go to a strip club,pick a gal,try to change her using marriage as bait..If it works,tho the chances a very low,fine..But if doesnt work and backfires,u a a goner

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by enemyofprogress: 11:27pm On Jun 28, 2017
FreeSpirited:
You are so dumb. Where did you grow up? Who brought you up? Didn't you date girls all your life before this girl? Don't you roll with guys before marriage? Well, the only reason for all this dumbness and docility must be from your religious orientation...cos I heard you say 'one brainless brethren asked you to marry her".I don't have advice for you cos you have disgraced manhood in general..and I'm so pained reading your shameful story Carry your cross.
Maybe if you have enough sense to do DNA and discover those children or a couple of them arnt your children maybe you will get sense and act like a man.
If I may ask, were you castrated? I can't believe a man will shun his dignity and allow a woman to rule him in such a pititful manner. You are a castrated man!
I can place a bet that your wife has been fvcking different dicks all along. Women who have such mind and courage to control a wussy like you won't find it hard to please themselves with whichever diick they desire because, they see themselves as the boss while you are just a figure-head husband with no power or authority. She can never fear your or have respect for your marital vow. She gives her body to men out there who are man enough to make her feel like a woman, not the way you make her feel like the boss.
I don't just know why I'm angry at how a man could so ridicule her birthright as a man. You lost your manhood. Go and learn or start reading what it means to be a respected husband, what it means to be a man that women adore...cos you have no business with marriage with the way you are. Yet I still don't have advice for you.. Wait till she end your life, you will have sense by then
God bless you jare. The guy Na disgrace to manhood

3 Likes

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Djbush: 11:28pm On Jun 28, 2017
I think she is possessed by some tough evil spirits. I'm sure your wife is married to a spiritual husband who has been tormenting her and your marriage.

Don't take a walk out of the marriage but rather try to seek help. We battle not against flesh and blood....

I wish you luck.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Guyman02: 11:29pm On Jun 28, 2017
In my case I provide everything in the home which she will still not appreciate my efforts.

Sex is almost boring because I have to practically beg for it like OP and sometimes it is accompanied with insults and many other things I don't have time to write about.

I can personally feel his pain and he is passing through for years in the name of remaining married.

2 Likes

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Sagay212: 11:31pm On Jun 28, 2017
If she is frustrating you this much, leave her and take the children along. If the children are a grown ups at least to the stage of primary level, you can get a house maid to help you take care of them. It's better you avoid her because very soon, you'll be tempted to beat her mercilessly and that might result to death.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:34pm On Jun 28, 2017
MizMyColi:
The worst thing that can happen to a man is to live with a woman who has no love, thoughtless and inconsiderate.

A man cannot change a woman, neither can a woman change a man.

When you get married to a human being, you need to understand that your marriage will not work unless you are ready to invest heavily in the virtues of love and kindness.

It pays to be open.
It pays to have a heart that is willing to let go.

I guess the woman harbors a lot of unforgiveness and hate in her heart.
She needs to become aware. She needs to connect with her truest and purest self.

Dear OP, I don't know how you will do it, but I think you have endured long enough.

Try to engage in things that make you happy.
Pray, seek divine counsel on what to do.

I will advise that you make peace with your current situation and try to avoid the negativity, all kinds of negativity.

I wish you well Sir.
You are very right, she never forgives any body, she never let go. I keep guiding myself against evil thoughts. Thank you and God bless. The

1 Like

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:34pm On Jun 28, 2017
MizMyColi:
The worst thing that can happen to a man is to live with a woman who has no love, thoughtless and inconsiderate.

A man cannot change a woman, neither can a woman change a man.

When you get married to a human being, you need to understand that your marriage will not work unless you are ready to invest heavily in the virtues of love and kindness.

It pays to be open.
It pays to have a heart that is willing to let go.

I guess the woman harbors a lot of unforgiveness and hate in her heart.
She needs to become aware. She needs to connect with her truest and purest self.

Dear OP, I don't know how you will do it, but I think you have endured long enough.

Try to engage in things that make you happy.
Pray, seek divine counsel on what to do.

I will advise that you make peace with your current situation and try to avoid the negativity, all kinds of negativity.

I wish you well Sir.
Thank you and God blesd

1 Like

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by chronique(m): 11:35pm On Jun 28, 2017
I think you need to give her space for a while and see how she reacts to it. If she isn't bothered after 3 months, serve her the divorce papers and move on.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by dotune(m): 11:36pm On Jun 28, 2017
Not everyone one with mental issues is roaming the streeet. Some are mild. It is clear your wife has a mental issue, maybe depression. She clearly needs help. Thank God domestic violence isn't involved yet and she probably hasn't been having any extra marital affairs, so it is surmountable.

As difficult as it is, you must show love, prayers and commitment are also key because you will at one point be tired.
Most importantly she needs medical help, alongside with prayers.
She has to agree that she needs help first before she can be delivered and you must also get the children to be strong for their mother.

Funny enough, that might be your main assignment in that union, that she may she may be delivered through you.

Just like marriage counsellors advise, if it degenerates into domestic and physical abuse you must separate from her without delay in order to avoid either of you ending in jail while family members wade in.

If it also degenerates into extra marital affair, you should separate so as not to contract a sexually transmitted disease.

Farewell.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Amhappy(f): 11:37pm On Jun 28, 2017
I had a neighbor like that. It was until it turned to full blown insanity that we knew she's not normal. We all said it was bad attitude. Now she's ok and sweet. Your wife need psychiatric treatment sir
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by FreeSpirited: 11:38pm On Jun 28, 2017
enemyofprogress:
God bless you jare. The guy Na disgrace to manhood

It just so annoying to read. As I am, no matter how rich or beautiful a lady is, if she develops an attitude during dating , i can only give her time, ultimatum, to make amend, and if she doesnt , I break up with her ass asap, there's no time for rubbish when there are countless sensible beautiful gals out there looking for husband.
You have to know your worth as a man, you still have to know what you want in life.

When we tell them to date girls when before marriage they will say it's a sin to date, it is a sin to hug. It is a sin to kiss....Now he married a girl he can't handle cos he's so naive how to date and earn respect from a woman

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by AuroraB(f): 11:38pm On Jun 28, 2017
grin Chase your away from her room when you come for sengemenge shocked
My guy, do you dress like a masquerade
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:39pm On Jun 28, 2017
banjicom:
I believe all this things that keeps happening is all your faults, you saw all the signs before your married her thinking she will change but she keeps getting worst. Now you will have to do it the hard way by choosing your choice.
from the beginning of my write up I admitted my fault, I only did all those because she has so much pains from the past, I thought that endless love will change her

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Guyman02: 11:40pm On Jun 28, 2017
PaperLace:
This is what happens when you try to do the job of a therapist.

Marriage is not a rehabilitation centre for dysfunctional people _ don't go marrying people with the plans of changing them in marriage.

I pity the innocent kids you brought into all this, such emotional trauma from a mother that should be loving.

Encourage her to go for counselling, something you should have advised her to do 11yrs ago, instead you put a ring on it.
That woman needs to heal.

advising her to go for counseling is like adding more fuel to fire, she believes nothing is wrong with her but him the husband. I tried that myself with my wife who behaves almost similar to @OPs wife and it was accusations that I want to tell her that she is mad?

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:40pm On Jun 28, 2017
lalanice:
I've read a similar story before, makes me feel this story is made up.
No , it is not believe me.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Ijobaorun(m): 11:40pm On Jun 28, 2017
Prayer is the key my brother if you really love your children and don't want them to experience the same thing. Endure her, pray for her, be patient a little with her, she will definitely change soon.
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by cricifixo: 11:41pm On Jun 28, 2017
I feel for you bro but I'm a realist.
You can either move out from the house or continue living in d same house with her but get a fresh young babe to shine your congo anytime anyday, believe you me, that will reset her fvcked up faculties

1 Like

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by edeXede: 11:42pm On Jun 28, 2017
grin grin Another breakup looming, I love breakups. Op please be fast with it.

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:42pm On Jun 28, 2017
PaperLace:
This is what happens when you try to do the job of a therapist.

Marriage is not a rehabilitation centre for dysfunctional people _ don't go marrying people with the plans of changing them in marriage.

I pity the innocent kids you brought into all this, such emotional trauma from a mother that should be loving. I won't say you should divorce her, but I am very concerned about the well being of your kids. The way she lashes out at them with insults isn't good for their psyche. I am sure you know that. You owed them the duty of getting he best mum, something you've failed on. You might wanna consider removing them from that environment for the time being _till you fix the mess you created.

Encourage her to go for counselling, something you should have advised her to do 11yrs ago, instead you put a ring on it.
That woman needs to heal.
very thoughtful of you, I am thinking of the counselling, but she never see any thing wrong, she believes everybody has a problem
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by cashboss2017: 11:44pm On Jun 28, 2017
U didnt state your name clear? anyway from the tone of your msg u must be an afonja grin grin right??

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Nobody: 11:44pm On Jun 28, 2017
@ lisbonabdulahi

Listen friend, Please pay attention to what I am going to tell you and this is for your own good. If not, I can assure you, we will lose you.

You are married to a Narcissistic woman. She has Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It is a mental disorder. A bruised Soul destroyed by Childhood of lovelessness.

If 80% of the traits I am about to list below occurs in your marriage, then what you should be doing is finding a way your kids can live far away from your wife.

1. She gives excessive attention to her beauty.
2. She never apologizes.
3. She says she is not a slave in your house and lures you to help in the kitchen.
4. She leaves home to hang out and comes home at her will.
5. She depends on you for every of her need and if she offers a gift to others, she complains how they may not use it well.
6. She says without her, you are nothing.
7. She monitors your finances and saves part of it and call it hers.
8. If you own a house, she says it is hers too.
9. She calls you my husband when she desires things from you.
10. If you guys quarrel she locks herself in a room and remains there and you are the one to apologize.
11. She complains that you take care of your own family and corners some stuff to her own family except she hates them.
12. She cries real tears even when she is at fault.
13. She blames others for everything and nothing is ever her fault.

I would have typed more, but I havent got much time. But if your wife exhibits 80% of the above characteristics then I have news for you.

She can not be helped.
She is not even aware of the fact that she is hurting others.
She believes she is the victim.

The solution is RUN. It is complicated with kids involved. No househelp will ever satisfy her, she nags the hell out of everyone.


When I read from you I will tell you the nature of her Soul. These entities locate Empaths like you. Charitable people. They hook you and the convert your love energy to negative energies that entities feed on without being aware.


These are different soul archetypes. The fight and flight mechanism of these people got activated in childhood mostly from broken homes and abusive childhoods so they stopped growing emotionally. So they are emotional babies even at old age they behave like their spouse owes them entitlements. They are mostly parasitic in nature and she will leave you the moment you run out of her supplies. All they know is what to get from you and not what to give. And they have to give, they try to control the person they give anything to.

You have done great so far, but she will never change. Get a househelp and stop financing her fantasies, use the cash to hire a househelp to take care of the kids. And I beg you cut off the love, cos I am sorry to say, they do not love truly. They only mimic your emotions. They are not capable of loving.

I will write about the spiritual angle to narcissism and why the Churches can not exorcise them, except ofcourse only tapping into Christ Consciousness can the Galactic Federation help you cut off the Soul contract you had with the Jezebel Spirit. They are so nice at one moment, just when you are so sure there is peace at home. Quarrels come out of no where.

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Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:44pm On Jun 28, 2017
VargasVee:
But you saw all these signs before you got married yeah? What did you think, she was going to magically change or with a kid in the equation, something would be different?

This is gonna go on for as long as possible, now you're faced with even a harder decision to make. Best thing for you right now is to bring both families together and decide whether to continue the marriage or discontinue. I know this type of woman, she'll drive you to the limit and you might do sth that you'll regret the rest of your days.
You are very right, I try to control myself as much as I can,

1 Like

Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by lisbonabdulahi: 11:46pm On Jun 28, 2017
fluxbush:
This your case is very strong. If all you say is true, then you have really tried your best. Don't come and kill yourself for another person. You aren't new to house chores and staying celibate for long periods of time,so you won't miss her much when you tell her to leave. Tell your wife to leave and get help. It isn't only when a person strips naked that we say he he or she has a mental problem. Such environment is even unhealthy for your kids to grow up in. Insist that she must get help, whether spiritual or psychological. We don't want to wake up one day and read the news that a wife killed her entire family. It's better to be happy alone than miserable for an entire lifetime. If she really wants the marriage to work,she will carry her legs,seek help and come back to you.

Again, as I always say, divorce isn't as bad as people paint it. If all has been exhausted, divorce her ass biko.
Thanks, she is just waiting for me to do something stupid so that she can send me parking
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Bism(m): 11:46pm On Jun 28, 2017
This is your own version of the story. Let hear from her because some men do desire self pity from people to soothe their ego. Then if the story is true, take my advice very carefully. Nobody will ever support a broken home or dyfunction family but instances arise when the needful is inevitable. You can let the marriage pass because you dont want your children to became fatherless in the near future because of psychological pressure weighing you down.if you die tomorrow your wife will not kill herself for you but will move on or get remarried. Ever head of why they are many landladies today than landlords. it is because of this kind of situation you are in now that created the aforementioned phenomenon. what i discovered from your write up is the non existence of love in your marriage. Let her go if she truely love you and want to keep the family together she would come and fight for it. For those critic who said that you overlook her misconduct before marrying her, let them note that according to the science of human behavior man is a dynamic organism that can change at any given time .
Re: Has My Wife Been Taking Me For Granted? by Malakh: 11:47pm On Jun 28, 2017
when Paul told you married people would have trouble in the flesh,he knew what he was saying because sometimes one person is entertaining a demon and the other the Spirit,so there's bound to be clashes and sometimes none has the Spirit,in some cases one of you has a demon that is stronger than the other spouse's demon,and in such situations there has to be a master or servant, so it all depends,one demon has to take charge but sometimes both wont agree,this is why scriptures says can two walk together except they be agreed,this is also why two must be one before they are married not necessarily in the flesh but in the Spirit before being one intimately but in most cases people go for the oneness in the flesh which eventually gets old, I wanna say more but you know what Yahshua told me to let the dead bury dead in other words don't worry about "dead" people's issues.

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