GreatChizzy:


NO ONE COMES OUTTA THAT ZONE ALIVE!!!!
U SHOULD NEVER HAD ALLOWED HER PUT U THERE!!!
SMH

ayam weeping in my soul, it is really distressing.

majekdom2:
how can you claim to to love someone and not respect. Love comes first... every other thing comes after. Respect is earned. If someo isn't showing love, you can't respect. If you respect someone for what he has or who he is, what happens when it changes?

I'm talking from a place of experience. To each his own.

You can love someone without respecting them.

truthsayer009:


My dear, What is love & what is lust? You are talking about the Love of God. The love of Man to Woman is different oh. As far as the little knowledge I have. God loves us unconditionally, I love my girlfriend because she has certain qualities. If those qualities aren't there, I will stop loving her. So that is conditional.

We all need to be realistic in our conclusions. People don't really love you, they love your qualities.



Perhaps, you should think about this from another angle?

who says God's love you unconditionally.... for you to earn God's love there are certain conditions to be met. Tho, he favors some people specially. There is no difference... Th bible said, love the lord they God, love thy neighbour... There is no commandment greater than these. Your wife/spouse is your neighbour. The same bible says, husband's, love your wife. You are permitted to stop loving her the same way God will stop blessing you when you choose denounce him as your God. So I ask, what defines you? When they ask you, tell us about yourself, you talk about your qualities. If they love your qualities, they love you! Abi you get 100 sides. I want to think you have a problem understanding english and how it is used.

majekdom2:
true love never fails.

Touchè. However,how obtainable is "true love"

OwoLee:


am forced to pray for you...you made a lot of sense...may God provide you your heart desire and if you have gotten that, I pray it last and always find happiness in it...aameen!!!

Amen. Thanks dear. I'm in the race already.

roysam:



Mutual respect is what keeps marriage going, because during the course of living together you are going to discover so many quirks about each other.

Exactly!

Marry the person you love. I must marry for love if not I won't tolerate my partner.

Juliearth:


Touchè. However,how obtainable is "true love"

scarce, hard to come by but that does not rule out the fact that it exist. Things is if you have not loved yourself enough, you cannot love another person.

remi1444:
ayam not myself again...I can't afford to lose her.

Abeg lose her than be friendzone

adajoe555:
Marry the person I love and that love me too

hmmmmm *coughs*

majekdom2:
scarce, hard to come by but that does not rule out the fact that it exist. Things is if you have not loved yourself enough, you cannot love another person.

Rule out your last statement,it doesnt always apply(just a philosophical gibberish)

BleSSedMee:



I'm talking from a place of experience. To each his own.

You can love someone without respecting them.

that is not love.... it some mental delusion. Respect is earned. They are both doing words. You can't love someone and not respect them. You can't love a man that comes home drunk, beats you, brings women into your house and so, you can't respect him. Likewise, if you can't love a man who shows you love and cares for you, you can't respect him. You can only pretend to. 1st cor 13:5 Love does not disrespect others.

seunny4lif:

Abeg lose her than be friendzone

like I should call the friendship a quit abi?

majekdom2:
who says God's love you unconditionally.... for you to earn God's love there are certain conditions to be met. Tho, he favors some people specially. There is no difference... Th bible said, love the lord they God, love thy neighbour... There is no commandment greater than these. Your wife/spouse is your neighbour. The same bible says, husband's, love your wife. You are permitted to stop loving her the same way God will stop blessing you when you choose denounce him as your God. So I ask, what defines you? When they ask you, tell us about yourself, you talk about your qualities. If they love your qualities, they love you! Abi you get 100 sides. I want to think you have a problem understanding english and how it is used.

My bro/sis or whatever gender you are, If God doesn't love us unconditionally, you and I will be dead by now.

Stop comparing God's love to Man and Woman's love. There are many non-christians / non-muslims who are Richly blessed. Some who are even atheist sef. God did not stop them from being blessed.

You don't earn God love, you get it by Grace. And for the Record, It is my personal qualities that define me. What differentiates me from the Aboki driving Okada on the streets? Yes, it is qualities.

Juliearth:


Rule out your last statement,it doesnt always apply(just a philosophical gibberish)

that's because you don't understand the context. If you are not satisfied with yourself, you cannot be satisfied by another person!

Thanks to everyone for all your advice.
I have learnt alot from today's post.
God bless you all.

truthsayer009:


My bro/sis or whatever gender you are, If God doesn't love us unconditionally, you and I will be dead by now.

Stop comparing God's love to Man and Woman's love. There are many non-christians / non-muslims who are Richly blessed. Some who are even atheist sef. God did not stop them from being blessed.

You don't earn God love, you get it by Grace. And for the Record, It is my personal qualities that define me. What differentiates me from the Aboki driving Okada on the streets? Yes, it is qualities.

I hope you are not the type that works with the "Grace covers all" mentality. Obviously, there are many mysteries you don't know @ first bolded. I don't wanna get religious but understand the devil give riches. Thats not to say God does not bless sinners. My point is, to think that God will continue to love you while you know you are living in sin is simply living in denial. @ last bolded, like I said you have a p understanding how I use my English. Your qualities defines you and that's why people can say they love you because they love your quality. So coming to say people love qualities and not you does not make any sense to me.

majekdom2:
that is not love.... it some mental delusion. Respect is earned. They are both doing words. You can't love someone and not respect them. You can't love a man that comes home drunk, beats you, brings women into your house and so, you can't respect him. Likewise, if you can't love a man who shows you love and cares for you, you can't respect him. You can only pretend to. 1st cor 13:5 Love does not disrespect others.

My dear I'm not deluded in any way. I love my husband to no end.

But I've got greater respect for him.
Marriage is not like a relationship.

If you'd refer to my last paragraph, you'd understand more. A marriage that has God as its overall head will not yield to such vices you mentioned up there.

There are days when love is thrown aside, when you both argue blindly. It's respect that will caution you.

I guess there are people that can relate to this.

BleSSedMee:



My dear I'm not deluded in any way. I love my husband to no end.

But I've got greater respect for him.
Marriage is not like a relationship.

If you'd refer to my last paragraph, you'd understand more. A marriage that has God as its overall head will not yield to such vices you mentioned up there.

There are days when love is thrown aside, when you both argue blindly. It's respect that will caution you.

I guess there are people that can relate to this.

pls don't come religious with vices statement. My point is simply you respect your husband because you love him. He has shown you love and you have submitted yourself to him. Argument is unavoidable most times. What cautions you is love... Like someone said, love is one big box that contains so many attributes. Pls read 1st cor13: 1 - end.

majekdom2:
pls don't come religious with vices statement. My point is simply you respect your husband because you love him. He has shown you love and you have submitted yourself to him. Argument is unavoidable most times. What cautions you is love... Like someone said, love is one big box that contains so many attributes. Pls read 1st cor13: 1 - end.

Okay brother man.

remi1444:
like I should call the friendship a quit abi?

I have been to friendzone before and it's the worst position ever.
She will come home and tell about diff guys hitting on her.
God forbid

majekdom2:
you are not under any oath or vow with your sister. It will be very unintelligent to come compare both relationships using the example above. Your sister don't owe you anything but your spouse owes you everything. When you fill forms... I don't see boxes where you have to tick the number of brothers or sisters but in almost every form, you have to tick whether married or single. Thats to tell you something

Those are exactly my points, my dear friend.
Thanks for your support.

Marry and grow inlove is way better,thats obviously the secrete of lasting marriages of the generation before ours

I think it's both because your really going to have testing times and learn to adjust and really let some certain things go for peace and prosperity.

Marraige failure is on the rise because people have forgotten how to have a decent dialogue away from phones or internet.

People think it's hip to love trash

BleSSedMee:


Okay brother man.

Yes ma'am, God himself is love.1st John 4: 8. When you put God as the overall head as you mentioned in the previous paragraph, you are putting LOVE as the head.

toastedbread:
hmmmmm *coughs*

why are you *coughing* come and marry me you don't want to hear

majekdom2:
that's because you don't understand the context. If you are not satisfied with yourself, you cannot be satisfied by another person!

Speak for yourself! These is a mere theory and not a figment of reality.

Juliearth:


Speak for yourself! These are mere theories and not a figment of reality.

I am not speaking for myself neither am I speaking for some other persons. It's no theories or pratical things. It's just principles by which life teaches it's lessons. If you can't be selfless, you can't love another person. There is no mincing words about it. Love comes with a lot of sacrifices. I have come to a simpler explanation, I hope you will understand now.

Three gbosa for you..
Five cans of gulder to ur fridge..

BleSSedMee:
Marrying for love is great! But love is not always enough for a long lasting marriage.

I'd say marry someone you would have unwavering respect for no matter what.

Thus respect is the main ingredient of a good marriage. Then comes love, commitment. And the rest.


Not forgetting the overall, putting God in the center of your relationship/marriage is the sure route to its success.

frenzyduchess:
Marry and grow inlove is way better,thats obviously the secrete of lasting marriages of the generation before ours

did your dad grow in love?

Marry the one you love. We all wish to grow in love but let's be sincere to ourselves, does it happen? With the unromantic nature of Africans, after childbirth, divided attention. But marrying the one you love, the children is an additional factor to make the love grow that is if the love has been genuine from onset and not for selfish reasons. That growing in love is great in movies. It does not happen in reality people. Our parents had a loveless marriage and our mothers came up with that phrase 'di bu ndidi' (husband is endurance). They went into marriage with the hope of growing in love but it never happened that is why saying 'I love you' is a big deal for them. Why should any endure in a marriage? A life Union? What we see as lasting marriage of the older generation was nothing but endurance of pain and torture for many of them.

I know many who cheat on their partners today , who don't find them attractive no matter what they do and their first excuse is 'I never loved him/her but she/he is a good woman/man so I'm not flaunting the cheating to his/her face'.