Choice is nice. We don't get that much.

chrisd:

No thanks 

i no blame you ........i'm just kidding oooo!

v

Goodguy if you have your personal standards, then gud for you!! A wise dude once said "if you don't stand for something, then you'll fall for anything."
I don't just live my life anyhow, i have policies that guide me which i review after self re-evaluations. Asking a guy out is one of the things on my "Don't Do" list for now.

Maybe in years to come after re-evaluating it might change, but for now VINNA AIN'T ASKING NO GUY OUT.

QED!

I bet it will make an excellent birthday present for a shy guy. Being rare, he's bound never to forget the girl - a little act for winning a friend for life. I still remember my high-school classmate & she can do no wrong by me .

Asking a guy out? Kill me! Shows you how cool/cheap u are. Actually, it can be the best sometimes. But not directly to him. You are a girl. U should know what to do. Like talk to people around him.

hmmmmm,I don't see anything wrong in asking a guy out...but well,I don't have to.They always beat me to it...

*passes by*

lol. NO WAY!. There is no way on earth that is gonna sound right. What the hell are u gon ssay to the guy. That is gon be a cheerful visit..you gon go....Excuse me? will u go out with me ? That is just not right for a girl. I dunno about others, but as for me, I ain't gonna ask no guy out.

grainger:

. NO WAY!. There is no way on earth that is going to sound right. What the hell are u gon ssay to the guy. That is gon be a cheerful visit..you gon go.Excuse me? will u go out with me ? That is just not right for a girl. I don't know about others, but as for me, I ain't going to ask no guy out.

asking a guy out doesnt always mean u have to say it to him directly, it depends on the guy u are dealing with........your action will say it all and if the guy get the message before u know it u are hooked up.

THAT'S A CROCK OF BULL !!! (saying girls can't ask a guy out !!!!)

I'm sick of double standards !!!

1. girls want to be treated "right" by men , like lady's, yet still want equal rights in all things. You expect your "husbands/boyfriends" to buy all sort of stuff for you ("It's my right, I am a woman", yet don't want to cede control over to these fellows.

2. Mark my words, I'm no chauvinist, but how 2faced can you be ? You won't ask a guy out, then complain when you end up with the wrong kinda guy?

3. Mark em again, I have no problem with truly liberated women !! Up them!! I have no problem with traditional women either. I just have little patience for women that take a convoluted path b/w the two schools of thought.

4. The best examples are girls that wait to be wooed, get wooed (mainly buy financial inducements and/or persistence) then turn around and complain, that they are not being treated right. What do you expect ?? sigh. Give me a good old feminist(self honest one), anytime.

5. finally, this is not directed at women in general, those of you that read this, pls be honest, and let me know what u think.

u r indeed Omo olooto.

lol. thanks.

Omo Olooto:

THAT'S A CROCK OF BULL !!! (saying girls can't ask a guy out !!!!)

I'm sick of double standards !!!

1. girls want to be treated "right" by men , like lady's, yet still want equal rights in all things. You expect your "husbands/boyfriends" to buy all sort of stuff for you ("It's my right, I am a woman", yet don't want to cede control over to these fellows.

2. Mark my words, I'm no chauvinist, but how 2faced can you be ? You won't ask a guy out, then complain when you end up with the wrong kind of guy?

3. Mark em again, I have no problem with truly liberated women !! Up them!! I have no problem with traditional women either. I just have little patience for women that take a convoluted path b/w the two schools of thought.

4. The best examples are girls that wait to be wooed, get wooed (mainly buy financial inducements and/or persistence) then turn around and complain, that they are not being treated right. What do you expect ?? sigh. Give me a good old feminist(self honest one), anytime.

5. finally, this is not directed at women in general, those of you that read this, please be honest, and let me know what u think.

Tell them oooooo!!!!!they are protecting their dignity....as if when the guy asks them out,they will not be all over him,infact the guy go tire...abeg,leave them ja re!!!

What's going on here ? 2 honest (yes, i know I'm biased) women replied in a row !! Maybe there is hope afterall !

I must say things have really changed since the old days cause girls sure don't have qualms giving a guy obvious hints these days, some are more direct...when i was in school a girl with some of her friends eating on an adjacent table in a restaurant on campus passed a note through one of her friend to me on my table, on it was her name and phone no. I thought it was cool...there have been others but suffice to say that I had the utmost respect for them cos they didn't appear cheap nor did the thought cross my mind.

I have met guys who claim to appreciate/ respect gilrs that could ask them out
Though I have not tried it, it's hard. Men are used to well.... rejection but women
can't stand being labelled as cheap and desperate (even if it's the case).
But then guys, if a woman ask you out, try to
1, appreciate the fact that she did so, cause that's courageous on her part
2, See if you can love her, she just could be right and
3, let me know her becos i'd like such a lady for friend, i need courageous ladies like that

@ariel:word girl, word!!!!!

its perfectly acceptable (im only sayin this cos i was always the one being asked out...didnt do it myself)

you fine you (just messing with you)

Well no palaver, we all claim to be emancipated, doing jobs men do, so we can go the extra mile, me sha my emancipation never reach that end and any babe that can do it is definitely that freeeeeeeeee abi I lie?

Thank you o jare ariel my sista.

If the ppl talking in here abt babe asking guys out are 'oyinbos'  or better still live abroad, then i won't say a word cos i know over there its not a big deal, the society is more matured and civilised. But my nigerian fellas in here shld understand that in Nigeria (I don't know about other african countries) (whether we like it or not, believe it or not) the believe system of our society has not matured to dat level.

An average Nigerian person will still think that a babe asking a guy out is either a cheap s**t or she is desperate for masculine attention.

This is not about Abroad or Nigeria. We're all human beings afterall.

I live in Lagos, Nigeria. It's not a big deal here either. Girls ask guys out equally well here. And personally, I wouldn't look at a girl that asks me out as 'cheap'. Infact, that will only make me like her more..depending on her manner of approach though.

goodguy:

This is not about Abroad or Nigeria. We're all human beings afterall.

I'm was not contesting that luv, only stating that our level of civilisation cannot be compared, and i'm sure u know that.

goodguy:

I live in Lagos, Nigeria. It's not a big deal here either. Girls ask guys out equally well here. And personally, I wouldn't look at a girl that asks me out as 'cheap'. Infact, that will only make me like her more..depending on her manner of approach though.

and i was not contesting whether babes do it or not. I was talking about our perception of those who do so. How does an average person in our society see a lady who ask a guy out? Except of course u've got your head in the clouds, you'll agree that our society does not see them in good light.

personally, i dnt think there is anything wrong in it. ideally, the guy ought to ask the girl out. but then `the person wearing the shoes knows where the shoes hurt`. so....whatever.

[[color=#770077]b][/b] IT NOT OK AT ALLL I CANT BELIEVE PPL ARE SAYIN THAT IT IS OK C'MON NOW. SUM BOIZ R DIK-HEDZ ACTUALLY MOST BOIZ R. DEY START 2 GET DA RONG IMPRESSION N DEY START 2 FINK DAT DEY R 2 HOT PLLZ IF A BOI LYKE U HE SHUD CUM 4 U. IT JUS LYKE A GRL ASKIN A BOI 2 MARRY HER EEEEEWWWWWWWW DATS SOOOOO RONG . N IF SUMTHIN HAPPENS BETWEEN DA 2 OV U HE CAN EASILY SAY " AFTER ALL U ASKED ME OUT" PLLLZZ BOIZ GET BIG HEADED 2 EASILY MAN.

****NUFF LUV N RESPESCT 2 MA BOIZ THOUGH***

peaCE

IT NOT OK AT ALLL I CANT BELIEVE PPL ARE SAYIN THAT IT IS OK C'MON NOW. SUM BOIZ R DIK-HEDZ ACTUALLY MOST BOIZ R. DEY START 2 GET DA RONG IMPRESSION N DEY START 2 FINK DAT DEY R 2 HOT PLLZ  IF A BOI LYKE U HE SHUD CUM 4 U. IT JUS LYKE A GRL ASKIN A BOI 2 MARRY HER EEEEEWWWWWWWW DATS SOOOOO RONG . N IF SUMTHIN HAPPENS BETWEEN DA 2 OV U HE CAN EASILY SAY " AFTER ALL U ASKED ME OUT" PLLLZZ BOIZ GET BIG HEADED 2 EASILY MAN.

****NUFF LUV N RESPESCT 2 MA BOIZ THOUGH***

peaCE

lol naw tha guy needs ta do something at least right? tha girl do enough he can at leas ask a question

Yeah, kill me now! I wouldn't do that....even for a guy that I worshipped the ground he walked on! Like seriously....but mine ain't for any reason as male chauvinism or blaming the guys when it comes to a wrong decision that I made. That is for me to deal with and face with courage. But the guts have not becoming incorporated in my genes yet. Probably in my daughter's genes there'll be something like that! Who knows....ppl are evolving!

It's a social norm in every society that men do the chasing - no escaping from it. There is this proverb that goes: A man chases a woman untill she catches him.. Personally I beleive that men are like fish. (no offence intended guys), I will NEVER chase, I'd rather improve on my chances to catching the fish I want with skilled preparation. I'd go about it that way that brashfully come full on in a guy's face and pull him no end. To say the truth, the more you're in a guy's face, the more elusive he becomes. Infact there's another saying that goes: A man is like a cat; chase him and he will run. Sit still and ignore him and he'll come purring at your feet. And girls, I've tried it a zillion times, works every damn time beleive me! For most men, the trill of romantic love lies in the challenge of the chase and many men live their entire lives in the pursuit of assorted bigger and grander thrills: women/work/sports/drink/betting, you name it, they go after it. Women who choose to chase and pursue men run the risk of going against human nature - men have been produced and proclaimed as active 'hunters', 'warriors', 'conquerors' etc So the more you chase him the more he goes the opposite direction! Seriously. What you ladies need to do is get out your fishing rods and be the bait, throw them hook, line and sinker and catch your big fish without chasing.Build on your confidence which is the single most important item you need and then:

a- be kind to yourself - people will thread on you if you make yourself low
b- stop comparing yourself to others, you'll either destroy yourself or others along the way
c- Build from your strengths, you can't master everthing but there a quite a few arears you're good at
d- Generate an internal source of pride, ie powerfully building your self esteem
e- Aim for character rather than 'a character', need I say more?
f- Enhance yourself, listening skills, physical appearance (of course) and all

Remember, you cannot bring a hook into a fish's mouth unless there is food on it that pleases it. I learnt all these the hard way, I'm giving it to you ehhh ...free hehehe. So get your act together with the above, and then set about getting him (not chasing him) - any guy who doesnt give you a second look, thought or chance is simply GAY.

NB: Oh and it has absolutely nothing to do with liberation/gender equality/emancipation bla bla - it is simply HUMAN NATURE for the man to do the chasing and the woman to do the catching. No way around it!

mmmmmm.............