I have a one year old son and ma wife has confided in me that she has missed her period. Am envisaging she is pregnant but I dont want to believe yet. The problem is ma son is still breastfeeding and I dont think am ready for a second child ( except its the will of God) now cos I want to her to further her education. What's your advice please?

Wait while married fellow in the house come and look into your matter. I am novice in this regard.

theres nothing else u can do but accept if she is pregnant

so pls accept the baby
i know its a bitter pill to swallow but ive been there and i know exactly how it feels
i hate for your wife to go through what i went through for 6 yrs
injections,emotional roller coaster,crying,depression coz there was nothing wrong with me or my husband
i learnt the hard way,
education can wait,it doesnt even have to wait
get her some help for your 1 yr old
she can continue school while shes pregnant but if she wants to wait then fine
i have a friend that started her masters some months before she got pregnant and finished a day before her 2nd child was born
if she can do it
your wife mos def can
cheers!

has she gone for a test yet? i heard nursing mothers don't see their periods regularly. mamas in the house should verify that.

@ poster,
 
Let ur wife have the baby, she can stop breast feeding the  other child immediately.
i know a woman that got pregnant with a five month old baby and the first baby was born through a caesarean section.
so pls don't abort ur child o, imagine u aborting that beautiful child u have already.
U are married, the union is legitimate before God. so Pray and he will devise a means forr u to take care of the baby.
things will just frizzle out, u'll see

browncocos:

theres nothing else u can do but accept if she is pregnant
i[b] had the same issue when my 1st child was 5mos and i aborted it
it took me almost 6 years to conceive again[/b]
so pls accept the baby
i know its a bitter pill to swallow but ive been there and i know exactly how it feels
i hate for your wife to go through what i went through for 6 yrs
injections,emotional roller coaster,crying,depression coz there was nothing wrong with me or my husband
i learnt the hard way,
education can wait,it doesnt even have to wait
get her some help for your 1 yr old
she can continue school while shes pregnant but if she wants to wait then fine
i have a friend that started her masters some months before she got pregnant and finished a day before her 2nd child was born
if she can do it
your wife mos def can
cheers!

That was really scary, i av to confess

am grateful for all ur useful contributions and advice so far.

browncocos:

theres nothing else u can do but accept if she is pregnant
i had the same issue when my 1st child was 5mos and i aborted it
it took me almost 6 years to conceive again
so pls accept the baby
i know its a bitter pill to swallow but ive been there and i know exactly how it feels
i hate for your wife to go through what i went through for 6 yrs
injections,emotional roller coaster,crying,depression coz there was nothing wrong with me or my husband
i learnt the hard way,
education can wait,it doesnt even have to wait
get her some help for your 1 yr old
she can continue school while shes pregnant but if she wants to wait then fine
i have a friend that started her masters some months before she got pregnant and finished a day before her 2nd child was born
if she can do it
your wife mos def can
cheers!

Best answer so far. This is what you're looking for.

llade:

I have a one year old son and ma wife has confided in me that she has missed her period.

Good gal, good calculation, best time to be pregnant. By the time the baby is born your son would be almost two, and by the time he is three, the baby would be one. Two year gap! Not bad at all!

well, there is nothing you can do now. the deed is already done. you might want to consider a contraceptive next time

Your first child is a year old not a few months. Take it in your stride. Next time think contraception.

your wife can further her education after the second baby.

but next time, like everyone said, use contraception. Breastfeeding doesnt always prevent a subsequent pregnancy.

still take a pregnancy test though, to rule out false alarms.

you can only make conclusions that she is pregnant after a test. Though, this happens very often when the first child is about one year old or less than that with a lot of couples. I have a friend whose wife is pregnant with the fifth child now, and ever since the 2nd child, they have been claiming that the subsequent pregnancies were mistakes.
Please, do proper spacing and family planning next time if you do not want a baby so soon.

poster be happy for your child as others have said but if you didnt want another child so soon why wasnt your wife using an iud?

@ poster,

Would you rather be married and looking for children? Please accept what God has blessed you with. A lot of people out there who are looking for kids will gladly trade places with you!

There's something called family planning you know. So if you really didn't want your wife to be pregnant you should have discussed it with the doctor as soon as she had the first one. Anyway now that the deed is done, please get help for your wife if she so desires it, and after this baby is born (that's assuming she really is pregnant), please do family planning.

You should be very happy that ur wifey is pregnant after one yr. that's fair enough
Please I beg u, dont consider aborting that child if she's really pregnant. Go to the health section of this forum and see what some people are going through.

Well for me, am happy for u cos by the time this baby would have been born ur 1st child will be two years, there is nothing to worry about.

As for her education, I have been in those shoes before and I can tell from my personal experience that there is no big deal to it.

I attended lectures with my 'heavy tommy' and it was all fun with all the teasing and yabbing from fellow students, I gave birth few weeks to my exams and there was no much stress cos I arranged for my younger to care for the baby while am in the hall. when she is crying too much I go out to quickly breastfeed and come back to continue my paper.

Nothing is too difficult for a detemined woman, I just rounded up school and my baby is a year+ now. It is not as difficult as it seems if well planned.

Cheers

@Poster all is well, do not fret

I am speaking from personal exprience.

When our first child was 8 weeks old, we got pregnant again. so i had a newborn and another babyon the way. But it is really not that bad. We took one day at a time and before we knew it our daughter was born. Then 11/2 years later we got pregnant again and we recently have a new baby. (BTW, all through this, I was running our company with 2 locations full time)

All I am saying is, with adequate support from you to your wife, she will be fine. There is nothing stopping her from going to school either. She just need to make up her mind on what she wants and then together map out a plan on how to accomplish those goals (leaving room for unforseen events).

Shalom

Congratulations!! start planning for the new baby,

also the case after the first baby,happened to me and we have to resort to contraception.Plan though for second/her education.

Am grateful 4 all ur contributions.

@poster, I have a few questions (you do not need to answer)

1: how long have you been married for.
2: What is your level of financial security
3: Do you have a job that pays at minimum N50k per month
4: Does your wife have a job N50k per month

It is important to realize that while children are a blessing, they require absolute care to nurture that blessing to fruition. when we walk the streets and see Area boys and street hawkers we often wonder what their parents thought, That is not your portion in Jesus Name. Amen

There is such a concept as Family Planning and it is not a fashion statement but a critical look at the following
1: Can you sustain the growth and maturity of your first-born,usually if you are caught by unplanned events that cut your monthly sources of income when a second child is on the way. the chances are you will manage finances to prepare for a second-born and the first-born usually bears the brunt by virtue of being older. eventually the first-born will come second-place as you try to bring-up your second born. when you add your responsibilities as a bread-winner and the fact that your expectant wife will also need more attention and monies during the 9month period. you are in for a whammy if you have not planned for this
2: Considering the high cost of rent these days, you may want to plan ahead and save up for rent, because it cost me at least N120+k at LUTH (Pre and Ante Natal, Birth and Recovery+Drugs) and I don't plan on visiting soon.

E don happen, e don happen, you need to start saving fast. otherwise you will be blind-sided with events you have not planned for.
Stick in there. It comes with the territory

lagerwhenindoubt:

@poster, I have a few questions (you do not need to answer)

1: how long have you been married for.
2: What is your level of financial security
3: Do you have a job that pays at minimum N50k per month
4: Does your wife have a job N50k per month

It is important to realize that while children are a blessing, they require absolute care to nurture that blessing to fruition. when we walk the streets and see Area boys and street hawkers we often wonder what their parents thought, That is not your portion in Jesus Name. Amen

There is such a concept as Family Planning and it is not a fashion statement but a critical look at the following
1: Can you sustain the growth and maturity of your first-born,usually if you are caught by unplanned events that cut your monthly sources of income when a second child is on the way. the chances are you will manage finances to prepare for a second-born and the first-born usually bears the brunt by virtue of being older. eventually the first-born will come second-place as you try to bring-up your second born. when you add your responsibilities as a bread-winner and the fact that your expectant wife will also need more attention and monies during the 9month period. you are in for a whammy if you have not planned for this
2: Considering the high cost of rent these days, you may want to plan ahead and save up for rent, because it cost me at least N120+k at LUTH (Pre and Ante Natal, Birth and Recovery+Drugs) and I don't plan on visiting soon.

E don happen, e don happen, you need to start saving fast. otherwise you will be blind-sided with events you have not planned for.
Stick in there. It comes with the territory

Poster did not complain about his inability to take of his possibly growing family. He was more concerned about his wife furthering her education.

llade:

I have a one year old son and ma wife has confided in me that she has missed her period. Am envisaging she is pregnant but I dont want to believe yet. The problem is ma son is still breastfeeding and I dont think am ready for a second child ( except its the will of God) now cos I want to her to further her education. What's your advice please?

Err . . . you want her to further her education or she wants to further her education If its the latter, what does she want concerning the pregnancy?

Why don't you go jump off a lagoon?

my first baby was 8months when i missed period, now anytime from now i will deliver my second, next time if u r rili serious abt not wanting an unwanted pregnancy, use a condom, other than that ,put a sock in it and take it like a man.

I don't see the big deal.
Your first child has turned One so it's okay. Just start planning for the next baby.
Congratulations!

mama-gee:

Why don't you go jump off a lagoon?

While I appreciate all the sagacious advice given to me so far on the logjam av found myself, I think I least expected this from u.

lagerwhenindoubt:

@poster, I have a few questions (you do not need to answer)

1: how long have you been married for.
2: What is your level of financial security
3: Do you have a job that pays at minimum N50k per month
4: Does your wife have a job N50k per month

It is important to realize that while children are a blessing, they require absolute care to nurture that blessing to fruition. when we walk the streets and see Area boys and street hawkers we often wonder what their parents thought, That is not your portion in Jesus Name. Amen

There is such a concept as Family Planning and it is not a fashion statement but a critical look at the following
1: Can you sustain the growth and maturity of your first-born,usually if you are caught by unplanned events that cut your monthly sources of income when a second child is on the way. the chances are you will manage finances to prepare for a second-born and the first-born usually bears the brunt by virtue of being older. eventually the first-born will come second-place as you try to bring-up your second born. when you add your responsibilities as a bread-winner and the fact that your expectant wife will also need more attention and monies during the 9month period. you are in for a whammy if you have not planned for this
2: Considering the high cost of rent these days, you may want to plan ahead and save up for rent, because it cost me at least N120+k at LUTH (Pre and Ante Natal, Birth and Recovery+Drugs) and I don't plan on visiting soon.

E don happen, e don happen, you need to start saving fast. otherwise you will be blind-sided with events you have not planned for.
Stick in there. It comes with the territory

Am grateful for ur coments but as tolutara said money is never the problem, I Work for a big oil company and any strain on my pocket is completely out of it as I can comfortably with God's grace cater for any number of children I want, same for the medic bills. But am just concerned about her furthering her education.

let the babe live

beingme:

let the babe live

Thanks

Am so happy for you llade because you are blessed. Many wish for one but find none. Please, let her start her school processes and then go on with the pregnancy, God will see her through it all and she will have no regrets.