The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

There is nothing wrong in it. After all it's better than fornication.

First things first why do you think you can't find a guy you love now. Sex should not be your motivation for getting married. So please thread carefully.

There is nothing wrong in that only that at your age, you're not to young at all to marry for a more better and mutually beneficial reasons. You can find the right guy to love and who'll in turn love and cherish you that you can settle down with. You can have it all dear-hot sex, companionship, love,..etc.
You're ripe age-wise but are you matured enough? That's the question you must anwer sincerly.

Op, I choose to disagree with your interpretation of that scripture. why? Because it disagrees with a lot of fundamental reasons for marriage e.g Marriage is for companionship, and you can only have that with someone you're compatible with. You can have sex with just any man that comes Ur way but individual compatibility requires intentionality. May I also ask what you occupy your with? If they are sexual, they can increase Ur urge o. I have been there.

Hi Thonia, long time. Nothing wrong in getting married at your age and of course its an age range that comes with a great sexual urge.

I only hope you can watch carefully and observe a man that really loves you and not just someone who will take you for granted.

Thoniameek:
The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

Great you are still keeping yourself. Sex is important and without sex, there would be no marriage.

However, you'll need to kill two birds with one stone. Since marriage covenant is till death do you part, a man who loves God, who loves you and who is matured and responsible to be your Husband is one you are looking for.

Sex!? When you get married, you will get tired of it. A minimum of 120 times a year (some couples may have more than 200 times a year). Only professional prostitutes do better than that.

Sex is just a fraction of things which gives a marriage fulfilment. Chase after that, and a good sex will follow.

Marriage is a life-long commitment and the inability to abstain from sexual intercourse shouldn't be your motivation for walking into it.

shadeyinka:


However, you'll need to kill two birds with one stone. Since marriage covenant is till death do you part, a man who loves God, who loves you and who is matured and responsible to be your Husband is one you are looking for.

Shadeyinka, I like your reply in its entirety, but I think OP needs to re-read and digest this part repeatedly. OP, listen to the wise words of this man.

Suaimhneas:
Marriage is a life-long commitment and the inability to abstain from sexual intercourse shouldn't be your motivation for walking into it.


Shadeyinka, I like your reply in its entirety, but I think OP needs to re-read and digest this part repeatedly. OP, listen to the wise words of this man.

Thank you!
I hope she will also learn from the success and errors of marriages around her.

Shalom

Thoniameek:
The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

I understand your situation but in my opinion, life itself is a risk; that is why you live everyday like it could be your last. Marriage is also a risk; whether you choose to marry earlier or later in life. There's no guarantee that if you are overly selective, that the marriage would be successful because much of that depends on the conduct of the individuals involved; and bear in mind also that people can change, either for better or for worse even in marriage, therefore you should just take life as it comes because nothing is guaranteed except maybe death (at some point). Marriage is just another phase that many of us will pass through at least once in a lifetime (some not at all, while others more than once even).

I respect your demonstration of rare courage up to this point by abstaining apparently for so long. If you believe that sex is only meant to be enjoyed in marriage, and your hormones are raging, and you feel you are mature enough to take the plunge, AND you have a willing partner that loves and cares for you enough to marry you, then go for it and see how it goes, bearing in mind that it is just another major risk into another phase in your adult life journey.

You see, I personally don't believe in the idea that there's only one particular guy or girl that can end up being your 'life partner', no I don't. There is a pool of options out there if only one is willing and unafraid to explore. While marriage is ideally meant to be for better for worse, in reality death comes along, even divorce (nobody prays for these but they happen), but life remains the constant because it will go on regardless. People move on, remarry and find another 'the one' and 'life partner'.

In essence, what I am trying to say is, just learn to trust your instincts and be not afraid to take risks, even if your decision doesn't come out right in the end. See it all as a part of the growing, learning, and living process.

Thoniameek:
The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

hi Tonia. I sent u a mail.

Thoniameek:
The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

hi Tonia. I sent u a mail.

op, so you want to let a jew that died 2000 years ago decide your life choices?

what exactly is your brain for?

Thanks everyone for your shared wisdom. Thanks shadeyinka and afroniger, I appreciate.

Looking to change some of the companies that I keep. The main issue is the urge and my fear of it clouding my judgement when a man shows interest. I think some people around me have in someway influenced my thoughts and increased the urge.

AlfaSeltzer:
op, so you want to let a jew that died 2000 years ago decide your life choices?

what exactly is your brain for?

Are you saying she should just marry whoever just to have sex?
Would you say the same to your Sister?

AlfaSeltzer:
op, so you want to let a jew that died 2000 years ago decide your life choices?

what exactly is your brain for?

My brain is for taking a good advise when I see one. And that Jew gave a good advise

Keeping in mind that good things don’t come easy...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBF8mGLmYHg

Thoniameek:
Thanks everyone for your shared wisdom. Thanks shadeyinka and afroniger, I appreciate.

Looking to change some of the companies that I keep. The main issue is the urge and my fear of it clouding my judgement when a man shows interest. I think some people around me have in someway influenced my thoughts and increased the urge.

So glad you could get to the root of the problem.
Continue to keep yourself undefiled by any man until your final marriage rites are concluded.

Stay blessed

Nutase:
First things first why do you think you can't find a guy you love now. Sex should not be your motivation for getting married. So please thread carefully.

Fogerrit, it's already her motivation. And If the man she gets doesn't meet up, wahala go dey.

Thoniameek:
The desire for sex is an insatiable force. In 1 Corinthians 7:9, Paul says. “But if they cannot control themselves, Let them marry. For is better to marry than to burn with passion.” Clearly he supports that sexual desire alone can be the deciding factor to marry.

I can’t masturbate (I don’t want to). My hormones are raging. I’m interested in marriage but I think the only reason I might be interested in any guy now is for the sex. I’m in my mid-twenties and never had sexual intercourse.

I’m afraid I might be marrying because I simply can’t abstain any longer. And is it ok to do so?

OAM4J

Oh my!

Abstinence/Chastity isn't easy. Keep fighting the good fight

You should understand what marriage is all about by
1. Knowing the originator (God) intimately
2. Know why He instituted marriage relationship from the beginning
3. Know what sex is all about from God's point of view

Only then can you why, when and who to get married to. Going into marriage relationship, or any other type of relationship for that matter, solely because sex will only lead to disappointment in the future.

Being a virgin in your mid-twenties isn't easy and it isn't also something special, there are people in their early 30's who are in your position and are still waxing stonger by God's grace (I'm 1 of them). Concentrate on God who gave you the gift, carry your cross DAILY (die to yourself) and He will continue to strengthen you.