In those days, our parents usually come together, they barely knew each other and they grew in love as a couple and in most cases, grew old together because they chose to love who they married.

They lay little emphasis on feelings, chemistry or even dating/courtship yet had a wonderful long lasting union but today, we want to be sure the feeling is real, we want to fall in love first, we want to be sure we are compatible and we meticulously pay attention to inconsequential matters and looking for faults and even many who tend to believe they got it right still end up breaking up after they eventually get married and i keep wandering what exactly are we getting wrong.

After a thorough research from GOD's words i found out that the ideal mode of marriage laid down by GOD have been abandoned and we have now come up with our own pattern...

Until we go back to the plan of GOD regarding marriage and understand that staying married is not about feelings or compatibility, neither is it about body chemistry or how romantic he or she is because all these aforementioned can never sustain a marriage but it is about growing in love and having a meticulous determination to love who you marry and stay married against all odds.

GOD's plan for marriage is for two people to come together and grow in love not for them to first fall in love before coming together.Genesis 2:22-24

I hope this makes sense.

Toks....
This your article get more than one head.. Which one we go choose.?

lalasticlala

And what crime will you be committing if you first fall in love before 'growing' in love? Well i think marriage is not a necessity but a preventive measure against fornication.

ShobayoEmma:
And what crime will you be committing if you first fall in love before 'growing' in love? Well i think marriage is not a necessity but a preventive measure against fornication.

The phrase falling in love does not make any logical sense but it makes mor sense to grow in love which has a stronger effect.

A friend once told me that loving who you marry is far better than marring who you love. So i think you are right(my opinion though)

So we should marry strangers...

...


I Dont See Myself Marry Someone I Dont Love And Then Hoping Love Will Come In One Day...


That Kind Of Love May Never Come!

Merryglad:
A friend once told me that loving who you marry is far better than marring who you love. So i think you are right(my opinion though)

...


This Doesnt Make Any Sense! So You Just Accepted Such Idea Without Questions

Oga Toks needs love.

Nigger is over 40 not married but forming relationship expert

NwanyiAwkaetiti:
Oga Toks needs love.

Lol! We all do.

Toks is right, love is a process..it never ends.

You people should read the definition of love in the bible..

It starts with love is patient.

You can never completely fall in love with someone..its not possible.. Its a renewable energy. It regenerates itself.

The only thing you need to do before getting married is to Ascertain compatibility.

izzou:
Toks, pardon me, but I haven't understood you clearly

You are saying we should first come together(marry) and then grow in love instead of first falling in love, and then getting married?

Unfortunately, those things that make us fall in love are the things married couples do so in most cases after you experience It, you get tired and break up just to start same circle with someone else.

So why not just marry the person and grow in love with such.

Toks2008:


Lol! We all do.

Abi na

yeyerolling:
Nigger is over 40 not married but forming relationship expert

The world is doing you.

Merryglad:
A friend once told me that loving who you marry is far better than marring who you love. So i think you are right(my opinion though)

Thanks for this post...i just realize i can form a better title with this.

you have a point though, however its is not entirely feasible. how can I marry someone I don't love?.. are you telling people to take a gamble?.. marriage itself is black market..why should we now enter a black market with dark shades?....,the definition of love itself has grey areas... some is looks,behaviour, money e..t.c....love overtime has change its form.. so you can't actually say it is this or that...my advise do what works for you... most of us know what is good for us but choose to ignore it for selfish reasons.you know that guy is a player..but you hope he will change in the future....you know shade sleeps around but you think with age she will stop..............marry people with their deficiency (all of us get am) not hoping they will change.

babyfaceafrica:
you have a point though, however its is not entirely feasible. how can I marry someone I don't love?.. are you telling people to take a gamble?.. marriage itself is black market..why should we now enter a black market with dark shades?....,the definition of love itself has grey areas... some is looks,behaviour, money e..t.c....love overtime has change its form.. so you can't actually say it is this or that...my advise do what works for you... most of us know what is good for us but choose to ignore it for selfish reasons.you know that guy is a player..but you hope he will change in the future....you know shade sleeps around but you think with age she will stop..............marry people with their deficiency (all of us get am) not hoping they will change.

Insightful.

I'm learning to rise in love... I don't want to fall in love. Aiming for that unconditional love. It starts with total self love and meeting all my needs by myself and then I graduate to a love that has zero conditions. So, instead of the 'I love you if you can do a, b, and c...' it's 'I love you because I am love!'

It's a spiritual journey. I want to be love instead being in love. One serves the ego and one serves the self. It's deep

I think I'll rather go with love who I marry than marry who I love.
Marriage is a different ball game, quite different from love affair besides a man can love two women at the same time but conventionally can not be married to the two at a time.

CaptJeffry:
I think I'll rather go with love who I marry than marry who I love.
Marriage is a different ball game, quite different from love affair besides a man can love two women at the same time but conventionally can not be married to the two at a time.

Nice submittion.

babyfaceafrica:
you have a point though, however its is not entirely feasible. how can I marry someone I don't love?.. are you telling people to take a gamble?.. marriage itself is black market..why should we now enter a black market with dark shades?....,the definition of love itself has grey areas... some is looks,behaviour, money e..t.c....love overtime has change its form.. so you can't actually say it is this or that...my advise do what works for you... most of us know what is good for us but choose to ignore it for selfish reasons.you know that guy is a player..but you hope he will change in the future....you know shade sleeps around but you think with age she will stop..............marry people with their deficiency (all of us get am) not hoping they will change.

Nice one....

It's a risky valuable point....We should just make plans and pray God directs our actions and His will be done.

izzou:
Toks, pardon me, but I haven't understood you clearly

You are saying we should first come together(marry) and then grow in love instead of first falling in love, and then getting married?

that's what she meant according to the scripture.

Headlesschicken:
So we should marry strangers...

that's his it is done in the olding days

To marry who I love cos am demisexual.

Toks2008:
In those days, our parents usually come together, they barely knew each other and they grew in love as a couple and in most cases, grew old together because they chose to love who they married.

They lay little emphasis on feelings, chemistry or even dating/courtship yet had a wonderful long lasting union but today, we want to be sure the feeling is real, we want to fall in love first, we want to be sure we are compatible and we meticulously pay attention to inconsequential matters and looking for faults and even many who tend to believe they got it right still end up breaking up after they eventually get married and i keep wandering what exactly are we getting wrong.

After a thorough research from GOD's words i found out that the ideal mode of marriage laid down by GOD have been abandoned and we have now come up with our own pattern...

Until we go back to the plan of GOD regarding marriage and understand that staying married is not about feelings or compatibility, neither is it about body chemistry or how romantic he or she is because all these aforementioned can never sustain a marriage but it is about growing in love and having a meticulous determination to love who you marry and stay married against all odds.

GOD's plan for marriage is for two people to come together and grow in love not for them to first fall in love before coming together.Genesis 2:22-24

I hope this makes sense.

never you marry based on love. Marry based on compatbility.

Love is just a feeling that fades away few months into the marriage.

love who you marry

I dont know whats love,an am not interested in all these erotic love,i just need money and more money and more money....The only love i have is the love for humanity and mankind as a whole

Two people must first come together in love before they can grow in love. It is a substance that grows. A seed grows into a plant; and if that seed is not there, there will be no growth of anything; it doesn't matter how hard you water the ground . Not every coming together of two people has the potential of growing into a loving marriage. Compatibility is important. That's why the Bible talk about the dangers of being unequally yoked.

Toks2008:


Lol! We all do.

I hope u are married now