She will give birth when she enters menopause.

Dear, I think your Mum is right, you just need to pregnant and forget about your mother in-law. Do not think,that if you don't have a child for your husband, will stop him from having a child from another woman. Your husband is a mature man,that is why he ask you not listing to everything his mum is saying. I understand your situation,but your time as a woman is running away from you. Don't make that mistake, that will hurt you for life. Take of that protection and get pregnant, for you and I believe your marriage will not crash except you crash it,but even if it does you will have something to fall back to. More importantly, pray and BRI g God to your home. Wish all the best

op is a small girl with big age.

@38 u don't want to v children and u expect everyone to happy with u

when I put my mouth now and you with your husband people don settle, I go turn owner enemy. I take God beg you, I nor get comment for dis kind matter

Kingsmeal:

I am a 38 years old woman. I got married to my husband when I was 36. I was not really into marriage. So I was not the desperate type. Even when my family,friends,everyone was pestering me about marriage,I didn’t care cos I was happy,living my life,happy and fulfilled.

By God’s grace,I am an accomplished woman. I have a thriving career. I have a house of my own and I have a masters while I am pursuing my PHD. I gave in to marriage when I met my husband through a friend that set up the match making. My husband,let us call him John,was and still is,a real estate developer. He is a divorcee but he doesn’t have any child from his ex wife.

I grew to like him and when he proposed,I agreed to marry him. Unfortunately,I didn’t get to meet his people until our marriage ceremonies. Both of us are adults and we didn’t think it was a big deal. John is over 40 years. But soon after my wedding,my mother in-law began to show herself. It was obvious that she didn’t like me. This makes me even suspect that she was the reason behind the first marriage crashing. Even though my husband said,it crashed cos they realized that they were not compatible. They quarreled a lot until they divorced.

Well, this woman came to visit us shortly after our marriage and refused to leave even after one month. I didn’t mind but for her constant nagging. She complains that I am not a homely wife. That I love my career more than my home. She would curse me and call me names. I was horrified but I tried to keep my cool. When I told my husband,he brushed it aside and asked me to be the bigger person by ignoring the mother.

Eventually she left but anytime she calls,she insults me and says that I should be thinking of having a baby instead of focusing so much on my career. That was when I told her to mind her business and stop calling me. That didn’t go well with her and she told her son who told me I shouldn’t cut off his mom.

Well,I ignored them both until my mother in law made a statement in a text message she sent me a few months ago. After calling me useless and all sorts of name in the text,she then goes to say that if I ever have a child,she would take the child and ensure that her son drives me away. That statement made me go crazy. I called her and told her off. That caused a serious problem between me and my husband . Who as usual,instead of correcting his mom and defending me,goes the way of saying:be the bigger person….I am fed up of his behavior.

He says,in their culture,a child does not confront a parent!…I think that is BS!. His attitude is giving me serious cause of worry. Much as I would like to have a child,I have serious hesitation with bringing a child into a home like this. So,I have not been actively trying for a baby. Its been two years. Everyone is getting impatient that I am yet to be pregnant. But as for me,I am not bothered. I am not even trying to have a baby.This is not the type of home to raise a child.

My mother says I should have a child cos the child will bring peace. But with my husband’s mother’s threat,I am not so sure. Coupled with my husband’s inability to address the issue. My husband does not know that I am on protection. And I am not about to go off protection until I am sure of the situation.


But I am writing cos I need your advise.If you were in my shoes,what would you do? I would like to have a child someday cos I love children but I am not sure of the future of this marriage. Having a child in an unhappy or broken home is not my idea. My mother keeps crying every day that my ‘biological clock’ is ticking. That I am being paranoid and selfish. Of course,she is thinking of her grandchildren more than my happiness.

I am exhausted. What should I do? should I have a baby or wait?…or maybe I should even start thinking of ending this marriage?…clearly,the man I call my husband cares more about his mother than he cares about me…

More below:

https://zenithnaija.com/why-i-do-not-want-to-have-babies-after-two-years-of-marriage/

Your just doing yourself my dear.

mrbyron:
Your mother in law tells you she will take your child and tell her son to chase you away if you give her a grandson. With all you education and exposure, how did you believe she can do that so easily. I just think you are generally put off with having a child and any slight deterrent will encourage you carry on.

On point

spiceadole:
The number one problem of wives is their murder-in-law...
You are not alone in this.

Naturally, women hate their sons' wives.

Just go ahead and have kids.. With your education and exposure, you should not scared of her empty threats.

see mentality


Hates dia son wives
Why?

You clearly do not want a child.
You clearly are very selfish.
You apparently do not want the marriage

I seriously find it surprising that even with PhD in view, you aren't really educated. Whew! Please stop erecting walls in your marriage...your MIL is almost inconsequential! Whew!

Just tell us u are barren and we will understand.

To say the fact your marriage is not based on love rather a mother in law kind of an affair.
please rethink your steps and get back to the drawing board don't have children in this kind of home.
it's apparently this is what caused his broken marriage and this will further kill your career and also expose you to the same divorce he once had.

Run for your life please....

If you can't take in and you are not bothered, my advice.
1. Wait until you are bothered. Or
2. Wait until she grows old and die. Make sure you don't kill her.

Isn't this like cutting the nose to punish the face??

Enjoy my siggy

mrbyron:
Your mother in law tells you she will take your child and tell her son to chase you away if you give her a grandson. With all you education and exposure, how did you believe she can do that so easily. I just think you are generally put off with having a child and any slight deterrent will encourage you carry on.

My dear, I've seen that happen. In fact, the situation I know of, the husband could not get a boy from the first wife, married a second, once a boy came, he, in collaboration with his first wife drove the second away and took the baby till today. Meanwhile, the first had just one issue. A girl child. So nothing is impossible.

I have no advise for someone her mother advised and she's still contemplating on her self decision. when you've your ulterior plan why come here for advise




for the fact that i love intelligent and focus lady, I don't pray to meet someone like you as wife

IamLEGEND1:
The answer is divorce.
no time for nonsense.

everyone knows the number cause of death in this country is the mother-in-law.

With this Advice I Put it To you That You are NoLegend!!!

Even the Lord knows I would have divorced this woman a long time ago

Kingsmeal:

I am a 38 years old woman. I got married to my husband when I was 36. I was not really into marriage. So I was not the desperate type. Even when my family,friends,everyone was pestering me about marriage,I didn’t care cos I was happy,living my life,happy and fulfilled.

By God’s grace,I am an accomplished woman. I have a thriving career. I have a house of my own and I have a masters while I am pursuing my PHD. I gave in to marriage when I met my husband through a friend that set up the match making. My husband,let us call him John,was and still is,a real estate developer. He is a divorcee but he doesn’t have any child from his ex wife.

I grew to like him and when he proposed,I agreed to marry him. Unfortunately,I didn’t get to meet his people until our marriage ceremonies. Both of us are adults and we didn’t think it was a big deal. John is over 40 years. But soon after my wedding,my mother in-law began to show herself. It was obvious that she didn’t like me. This makes me even suspect that she was the reason behind the first marriage crashing. Even though my husband said,it crashed cos they realized that they were not compatible. They quarreled a lot until they divorced.

Well, this woman came to visit us shortly after our marriage and refused to leave even after one month. I didn’t mind but for her constant nagging. She complains that I am not a homely wife. That I love my career more than my home. She would curse me and call me names. I was horrified but I tried to keep my cool. When I told my husband,he brushed it aside and asked me to be the bigger person by ignoring the mother.

Eventually she left but anytime she calls,she insults me and says that I should be thinking of having a baby instead of focusing so much on my career. That was when I told her to mind her business and stop calling me. That didn’t go well with her and she told her son who told me I shouldn’t cut off his mom.

Well,I ignored them both until my mother in law made a statement in a text message she sent me a few months ago. After calling me useless and all sorts of name in the text,she then goes to say that if I ever have a child,she would take the child and ensure that her son drives me away. That statement made me go crazy. I called her and told her off. That caused a serious problem between me and my husband . Who as usual,instead of correcting his mom and defending me,goes the way of saying:be the bigger person….I am fed up of his behavior.

He says,in their culture,a child does not confront a parent!…I think that is BS!. His attitude is giving me serious cause of worry. Much as I would like to have a child,I have serious hesitation with bringing a child into a home like this. So,I have not been actively trying for a baby. Its been two years. Everyone is getting impatient that I am yet to be pregnant. But as for me,I am not bothered. I am not even trying to have a baby.This is not the type of home to raise a child.

My mother says I should have a child cos the child will bring peace. But with my husband’s mother’s threat,I am not so sure. Coupled with my husband’s inability to address the issue. My husband does not know that I am on protection. And I am not about to go off protection until I am sure of the situation.


But I am writing cos I need your advise.If you were in my shoes,what would you do? I would like to have a child someday cos I love children but I am not sure of the future of this marriage. Having a child in an unhappy or broken home is not my idea. My mother keeps crying every day that my ‘biological clock’ is ticking. That I am being paranoid and selfish. Of course,she is thinking of her grandchildren more than my happiness.

I am exhausted. What should I do? should I have a baby or wait?…or maybe I should even start thinking of ending this marriage?…clearly,the man I call my husband cares more about his mother than he cares about me…

More below:

https://zenithnaija.com/why-i-do-not-want-to-have-babies-after-two-years-of-marriage/

While u keep thinking, just remember one thing and it's Tick tack Tick tack. Ur biological clock is ticking and u don't have much time anymore. At 40 forget a child and best look for a surrogate or u adopt.

IamLEGEND1:
The answer is divorce.
no time for nonsense.

everyone knows the number cause of death in this country is the mother-in-law.

Divorce at age 38..hmm

Kingsmeal:

I am a 38 years old woman. I got married to my husband when I was 36. I was not really into marriage. So I was not the desperate type. Even when my family,friends,everyone was pestering me about marriage,I didn’t care cos I was happy,living my life,happy and fulfilled.

By God’s grace,I am an accomplished woman. I have a thriving career. I have a house of my own and I have a masters while I am pursuing my PHD. I gave in to marriage when I met my husband through a friend that set up the match making. My husband,let us call him John,was and still is,a real estate developer. He is a divorcee but he doesn’t have any child from his ex wife.

I grew to like him and when he proposed,I agreed to marry him. Unfortunately,I didn’t get to meet his people until our marriage ceremonies. Both of us are adults and we didn’t think it was a big deal. John is over 40 years. But soon after my wedding,my mother in-law began to show herself. It was obvious that she didn’t like me. This makes me even suspect that she was the reason behind the first marriage crashing. Even though my husband said,it crashed cos they realized that they were not compatible. They quarreled a lot until they divorced.

Well, this woman came to visit us shortly after our marriage and refused to leave even after one month. I didn’t mind but for her constant nagging. She complains that I am not a homely wife. That I love my career more than my home. She would curse me and call me names. I was horrified but I tried to keep my cool. When I told my husband,he brushed it aside and asked me to be the bigger person by ignoring the mother.

Eventually she left but anytime she calls,she insults me and says that I should be thinking of having a baby instead of focusing so much on my career. That was when I told her to mind her business and stop calling me. That didn’t go well with her and she told her son who told me I shouldn’t cut off his mom.

Well,I ignored them both until my mother in law made a statement in a text message she sent me a few months ago. After calling me useless and all sorts of name in the text,she then goes to say that if I ever have a child,she would take the child and ensure that her son drives me away. That statement made me go crazy. I called her and told her off. That caused a serious problem between me and my husband . Who as usual,instead of correcting his mom and defending me,goes the way of saying:be the bigger person….I am fed up of his behavior.

He says,in their culture,a child does not confront a parent!…I think that is BS!. His attitude is giving me serious cause of worry. Much as I would like to have a child,I have serious hesitation with bringing a child into a home like this. So,I have not been actively trying for a baby. Its been two years. Everyone is getting impatient that I am yet to be pregnant. But as for me,I am not bothered. I am not even trying to have a baby.This is not the type of home to raise a child.

My mother says I should have a child cos the child will bring peace. But with my husband’s mother’s threat,I am not so sure. Coupled with my husband’s inability to address the issue. My husband does not know that I am on protection. And I am not about to go off protection until I am sure of the situation.


But I am writing cos I need your advise.If you were in my shoes,what would you do? I would like to have a child someday cos I love children but I am not sure of the future of this marriage. Having a child in an unhappy or broken home is not my idea. My mother keeps crying every day that my ‘biological clock’ is ticking. That I am being paranoid and selfish. Of course,she is thinking of her grandchildren more than my happiness.

I am exhausted. What should I do? should I have a baby or wait?…or maybe I should even start thinking of ending this marriage?…clearly,the man I call my husband cares more about his mother than he cares about me…

More below:

https://zenithnaija.com/why-i-do-not-want-to-have-babies-after-two-years-of-marriage/

Madam go and give birth if you have a womb

Ur own mother is just crying and begging u to have kids and not giving it hot to u like ur monther-in-law because she's your mother. Sister ur Ego and ideology dey do u not ur mothher-in-law

Kingsmeal:

I am a 38 years old woman. I got married to my husband when I was 36. I was not really into marriage. So I was not the desperate type. Even when my family,friends,everyone was pestering me about marriage,I didn’t care cos I was happy,living my life,happy and fulfilled.

By God’s grace,I am an accomplished woman. I have a thriving career. I have a house of my own and I have a masters while I am pursuing my PHD. I gave in to marriage when I met my husband through a friend that set up the match making. My husband,let us call him John,was and still is,a real estate developer. He is a divorcee but he doesn’t have any child from his ex wife.

I grew to like him and when he proposed,I agreed to marry him. Unfortunately,I didn’t get to meet his people until our marriage ceremonies. Both of us are adults and we didn’t think it was a big deal. John is over 40 years. But soon after my wedding,my mother in-law began to show herself. It was obvious that she didn’t like me. This makes me even suspect that she was the reason behind the first marriage crashing. Even though my husband said,it crashed cos they realized that they were not compatible. They quarreled a lot until they divorced.

Well, this woman came to visit us shortly after our marriage and refused to leave even after one month. I didn’t mind but for her constant nagging. She complains that I am not a homely wife. That I love my career more than my home. She would curse me and call me names. I was horrified but I tried to keep my cool. When I told my husband,he brushed it aside and asked me to be the bigger person by ignoring the mother.

Eventually she left but anytime she calls,she insults me and says that I should be thinking of having a baby instead of focusing so much on my career. That was when I told her to mind her business and stop calling me. That didn’t go well with her and she told her son who told me I shouldn’t cut off his mom.

Well,I ignored them both until my mother in law made a statement in a text message she sent me a few months ago. After calling me useless and all sorts of name in the text,she then goes to say that if I ever have a child,she would take the child and ensure that her son drives me away. That statement made me go crazy. I called her and told her off. That caused a serious problem between me and my husband . Who as usual,instead of correcting his mom and defending me,goes the way of saying:be the bigger person….I am fed up of his behavior.

He says,in their culture,a child does not confront a parent!…I think that is BS!. His attitude is giving me serious cause of worry. Much as I would like to have a child,I have serious hesitation with bringing a child into a home like this. So,I have not been actively trying for a baby. Its been two years. Everyone is getting impatient that I am yet to be pregnant. But as for me,I am not bothered. I am not even trying to have a baby.This is not the type of home to raise a child.

My mother says I should have a child cos the child will bring peace. But with my husband’s mother’s threat,I am not so sure. Coupled with my husband’s inability to address the issue. My husband does not know that I am on protection. And I am not about to go off protection until I am sure of the situation.


But I am writing cos I need your advise.If you were in my shoes,what would you do? I would like to have a child someday cos I love children but I am not sure of the future of this marriage. Having a child in an unhappy or broken home is not my idea. My mother keeps crying every day that my ‘biological clock’ is ticking. That I am being paranoid and selfish. Of course,she is thinking of her grandchildren more than my happiness.

I am exhausted. What should I do? should I have a baby or wait?…or maybe I should even start thinking of ending this marriage?…clearly,the man I call my husband cares more about his mother than he cares about me…

More below:

https://zenithnaija.com/why-i-do-not-want-to-have-babies-after-two-years-of-marriage/

You hubby is a mummy's boy @ over 40! I am married and respect my parents but I know where to draw the line. My parents can only advise me but can't dictate what happens in my home. A man/woman leaves there parents and cleave to his wife.

You hubby is a mummy's boy @ over 40! I am married and respect my parents but I know where to draw the line. My parents can only advise me but can't dictate what happens in my home. A man/woman leaves there parents and cleave to his wife.

You are on protection Are you a feminist? Why get married if you don't want to have kids? Remember that soon, menopause will come knocking.

This one don already scatter her womb with series of abortions.

All those talk about career this career that na just to cover up.

At 38 abi 40 you're still contemplating on whether to have a baby or not?

Hanty sorry, but that's just story for the gods.

with your mindset and your write up,you were,suppose to have a wife not a husband

don't call me a bad adviser, have a baby for him from another Man (seed)... in case of eventuality if they try to throw u out after the baby , you can go to court damand for paternity test and rob the child on their Face... some men are still Adult Baby.. any way if u need a free donations I'm available... 6ft tall, chocolates complexion, romantic eyes and cute 7inch propeller that can go deeper and deeper if fully erect... hire me for the job if u wanna consider my advise, I'm wiser than snake ;Day

Your hubby is a mummy's boy @ over 40! I am married and respect my parents but I know where to draw the line. My parents can only advise me but can't dictate what happens in my home. A man/woman leaves their parents and cleave to his wife.

About your mother in-law threatening to chase you away after having kids, it is a bluff. Remember that your husband's first marriage was childless. Have kids and she would love you more.


You are on protection Are you a feminist? Why get married if you don't want to have kids? @38 Even if you aren't married at that age, you may get pregnant and be a single mother. Remember that soon, menopause will come knocking.

madam, your issue is very simple.
pertaining your mother In-laws attitudes towards u, it's imperative for u to love her despite the fact that she hated u by doing so, she will have no choice than to love u back and appreciate you for who you are. mind u, we learn to hate & love because we have liberty of choice.
2. To create a toxic home/marriage is the creation of the mind and attitude/actions we displayed. we can create any environment we so wishes, toxic/polluted/therapeutic milieu,pleasant etc, depending on what we choose with our partners and ppl around. study urself and partner to know how to improve ur relationship with them. All of us have mumu codes but it's left for u to locate and press it.
3. You marries you husband and not his family but remember before u met and marry him, he's from a family that love and care about him and his well being. we call them,by standers and onlookers in marriage, they may be beneficial to us in one way or the other. they can be stressful, loving, caring, hurtful, and helpful at the same time but we still love and care about them,even thou they are not our responsible neither are we theirs. The best thing to do is to build a lasting relationship with your husband's family, no matter how difficult it's because they will be of help someday.
4.Growth and maturation is one of the characteristics of human being. madame, u are not a robot so natural processes must happened in your life. Menopause will come just as u had menarche. If you have any intention to have a child of yours' then it's becoming late. Take yourself off that estrogen shots, pills,implant etc. Have your child and create your dream with that child in it. I have one and there's no good feeling like that in the whole world. I love it.
5.Talk to your partner pertaining his attitude.
6.Don't ever exchange any negative conversation with your mother in-law again. Apologized to your husband and her. There's no price for a peaceful home.
7. U are living in fantasy, embrace reality pls.
8. Embrace wisdom, it makes a virtuous woman.
9.What will you be remembered of in that marriage when all is been said and done?
10. Be happy and free if u so wishes.
Thanks, because I care.

Pack ur bags and baggages ma'am and say goodbye to that sycophantic sycophant u called husband.. He is not qualified to be a man in all ramifications.. As a matter of fact, he is a Dundee like Mr buhari of Nigeria.. He only has power in the other room... And in case u Luv ur husband and still want to be enjoying is stupidity, just go ahead and kill ur mother in-law.


The best advise for the year 2018

spiceadole:
The number one problem of wives is their murder-in-law...
You are not alone in this.

Naturally, women hate their sons' wives.

Just go ahead and have kids.. With your education and exposure, you should not scared of her empty threats.

Will you also hate your son's wife? its suppose to be the other way round that wives hate their mother in-laws.

nanauju:
I don't understand this woman and her story. She's already 38 without a child and still taking pills. Giving us cock and bull MIL story, seems she's planning to leave the man in the long run if things doesn't play her way mtcheew.
Abeg she should leave the guy, she's better off single

Even without the man's consent. She's wrong for doing that. Things like that should be discussed and agreed upon. That's selfishness.