Hedonisco:
Report done by a white man, for white women in Western societies, yet some stupid Nigerians are finding consolation in it.

Be deceiving yourselves.

And that's why we keep running to them for help because they're much better organised. They're not differently created. It's our habit that has led us into this situation we've found ourselves. Think about it. When a man should have like 3 kids and give them the best education they deserve and plan a better future for them, they end up having 2 to 3 wives all in the name of religion and culture and rear children like chickens. In the end, it would be survival of the fittest and every child would find their ways. Maybe only one amongst them would think right and be ok, whilst others would become kidnappers, armed robbers, cultists, name it. The same white man would have just few kids and still come to Africa to give donations to those who have succeeded in making themselves less privileged due to their own insanity. Bill Gates, Mark Zuckerberg, Barak obama, bill Clinton, oprah Winfrey, just to mention a few are successful in their endeavours. How many children do they have? Google would help you out. If you don't bite much more than you could chew, you'd have peace of mind and a better life. My take.

Values are and should always be personal for a person to reap any kind of benefit. Society cannot value something for an individual, it can only value something for itself. A society might value marriage because it helps increase its population while providing structure for its growing members. But it doesn't mean every individual would find satisfaction in being drafted to this cause. Some will, others won't.

People who want to be married, but aren't, would be less happy than they could be after their goals are met. People who don't want to be married, but somehow found themselves hitched, would be less happy than they would have been without the commitment. None of these people would necessarily be miserable, depending on how big of a deal marriage is to the individual. A person's happiness depends on so many factors.

Therefore, a comparison of the happiness of married and unmarried people across the board cannot be used to judge which marital status is more beneficial to people in general. In the end, it comes down to the individual. What would make YOU happy or happIER? We are not in a race, competing for who is happiest. We are just trying to serve ourselves the best way we can. And the fact that single people might occasionally admire a cute family; or that married people occasionally envy the freedom of single people doesn't necessarily mean they chose wrongly. Because afterwards, they realise that they wouldn't have had the lasting desire to make the scenario work for themselves.

Let's just be who we are, and do our heart's conviction. It's the only way to be happy.

Nobody can humiliate you for not having a husband or children. They do if you let them.

I understand the biological need to have children is very strong in most women but she can definitely love with herself without having a child of their own. She needs to stop wallowing, not everyone has been destined to have children.

Wettoid123:
Nonsense talk! My sister is crying all day because of her childlessness she has been waiting upon the lord still no answer,
We are looking for #500k to give to her now so she can adopt,do u know the agony somebody that is childless passes through the humiliation alone is something else.

You should tell your mum that. Aren't you a wonderful son!

FortuneDeGreat post =82642354:
They can't help but comply totallyto nature's dictates, such is their primary obligation, shut your mouth and act accordingly.

midnighter:
That may be the case, but from a purely evolutionary stance, maximum happiness will take a lower priority than other biological imperatives

Survival and passing genes onto a another generation will trump all

Therefore some contentment will be sacrificed in order to achieve the aim and preserve the species

I think this is why society tends towards leaning on women to have children, sometimes to their detriment

Some western countries have a rapidly declining birthrate because people have started to consider sociological factors like happiness, contentment, stress, etc above biological ones

even in the so called western societies we imitate the white women have children ,They marry like crazy. The love that Marriage stuff the same way every other woman here. Not even Alot of them are into this Feminist bullshit at least I know about the Europeans it's funny that the inventors of FEMINISM do it with their BRAINS or don't even give a Bleep about it BUT BLACK WOMEN WHO COPIED THAT CULTURE TENDS TO CARRY IT ON THEIR HEAD LIKE GALA DOING IT MORE THAN THE ORIGINATORS WHICH IS ANNOYING.if you enter the US you find out that the white women have HOMES while their black counterparts Don't even have men around to date them because of their attitude a whooping 70% of black women in the US are single and seriously searching but once you get talking with them you see them trying to tell you how they don't need any man whereas the are The MOST desperate.

Chukapage:
even in the so called western societies we imitate the white women have children ,They marry like crazy. The love that Marriage stuff the same way every other woman here. Not even Alot of them are into this Feminist bullshit at least I know about the Europeans it's funny that the inventors of FEMINISM do it with their BRAINS or don't even give a Bleep about it BUT BLACK WOMEN WHO COPIED THAT CULTURE TENDS TO CARRY IT ON THEIR HEAD LIKE GALA DOING IT MORE THAN THE ORIGINATORS WHICH IS ANNOYING.if you enter the US you find out that the white women have HOMES while their black counterparts Don't even have men around to date them because of their attitude a whooping 70% of black women in the US are single and seriously searching but once you get talking with them you see them trying to tell you how they don't need any man whereas the are The MOST desperate.

I don't really get your point

You think women care? Lmao...that's why sane women put their children first. It's always men who go out of their way to get into a woman's legs,
never the woman. Lmao.

sylve11:


if nor be children, trust me, men nor go keep women for house.

Breaststroke:


Yinmu! You can never be happy without a child . I strongly disagree, I am an exception to this rule.

Motherhood is not for everyone, just because we have the equipment for it, doesn't mean we all have the disposition for it.

There's a consistent lack of desire for children I particularly feel. I have zero interest in birthing a child of my own, how do we explain that?

I am actually glad about being child free and staying that way. The researcher echoed my sentiments about kids in this article.

How old are you?

Why are men so pained at this news? Like chill!!! Y'all claim women can't do without you and now that it's been proven that they can (by actual experts) you're crying all over the place and swearing on you lives it's not true.

Sterope:
There were never true marriages at any point in history. What you had were marriages were women kept their mouths shut and acted as told.

This Feminists sef ok Women don't NEED MARRIAGE ITS MEN THAT DEPENDS ON IT TO LIVE . Even na babymamarism sure pass women don't need Marriage na we men need am are you happy now?

Midas01:
You think women care? Lmao...that's why sane women put their children first. It's always men who go out of their way to get into a woman's legs,
never the woman. Lmao.

Men are actually fools... If they wait a little longer, women would come paying them for sex.

Sterope:
Nobody can humiliate you for not having a husband or children. They do if you let them.

I understand the biological need to have children is very strong in most women but she can definitely love with herself without having a child of their own. She needs to stop wallowing, not everyone has been destined to have children.

But you know in Africa it doesn't work that way the heat from your husband family alone we frustrate d person,Africa mentality is different from.the western world.

midnighter:


I don't really get your point

The point is not to preach to anybody about having children or not, the point is letting people have their choice on what makes them happy

read again and get my point. I mean even the stuffs you people are copying so hard and fast ,The major inventors don't follow it as much as the copy cats do ,You understand me now abi? Few whites preach what majority whites Don't follow majority black copy cats goes out to copy heavily to their own detriment.

.

CHoccolaTE:
I asked this question before in another topic and I will ask it again;
What exactly do women gain from marriages apart from escaping societal pressure of getting married and having kids?

Men are the ones prolonging their lineage with marriage and kids,
Men are the ones in charge of whatever homes they set up after marriage, they have control, they have the final say. Everyone submits to them.
Men are the ones who get both a co-breadwinner and lifetime cook, cleaner, sex slave ( trust me many married women lack sexual satisfaction, sex after marriage is mostly for husband's benefit),
Men can even cheat with impunity and have children outside wedlock and go scot free, he basically maintains his freedom to have wanton sex just like when he was a bachelor, and he gets no blame and his wife is advised to stay with him because men are ' naturally polygamous'.


Yet society wants us to believe women benefit more from marriages.


With loss of freedom, loss of former identity ( changing surname even if the man you now bear his name cannot take care of you or provide for you), loss of beauty and youth after having children that belong to another mans lineage and family, horrible unsatisfying sex life in many cases, is forced to overlook cheating husbands behaviour, must balance greatest majority of housework and breadwinning while husband contributes barest minimum to housework. The man might even be jobless but the wife is advised to stay and support her husband and help him grow.

Infact the list of losses is endless.

Please what doing mean by " , horrible unsatisfying sex life in many cases, is forced to overlook cheating husbands behaviour, must balance ?

Chukapage:
read again and get my point. I mean even the stuffs you people are copying so hard and fast ,The major inventors don't follow it as much as the copy cats do ,You understand me now abi? Few whites preach what majority whites Don't follow majority black copy cats goes out to copy heavily to their own detriment.

You just quoted me from nowhere and started ranting. I dont get your point because nothing you said corresponds to my original post

I was talking about evolutionary factors that influence how society views child-bearing so i dont get where youre coming from

Midas01:
Why are men so pained at this news? Like chill!!! Y'all claim women can't do without you and now that it's been proven that they can (by actual experts) you're crying all over the place and swearing on you lives it's not true.

they are pained because
they benefit from marriage more
they have regular sèx which they need more than women
they can continue with their careers and have a cheap maid/helper/cook at home
yet she will have to make money too and contribute
they get children without the pains of child birth

and as the article stated, they get some sense

I think it is more about women with children. It is still the norm for women to do everything while also holding down a job.

Chukapage:
This Feminists sef ok Women don't NEED MARRIAGE ITS MEN THAT DEPENDS ON IT TO LIVE . Even na babymamarism sure pass women don't need Marriage na we men need am are you happy now?

CHoccolaTE:
Hahahaha

This topic always pains men

Men are such hypocrites.
They go about declaring that they hate marriages
And have no need for it
Marriage is bondage,
Etc etc

But when women open their mouths to say they are happier without marriages just like men they get angry and forcefully insist that women want and desire marriage

Pls keep it up Miss

[quote author=CHoccolaTE post=78845645]I asked this question before in another topic and I will ask it again;
What exactly do women gain from marriages apart from escaping societal pressure of getting married and having kids?

Men are the ones prolonging their lineage with marriage and kids,
Men are the ones in charge of whatever homes they set up after marriage, they have control, they have the final say. Everyone submits to them.
Men are the ones who get both a co-breadwinner and lifetime cook, cleaner, sex slave ( trust me many married women lack sexual satisfaction, sex after marriage is mostly for husband's benefit),
Men can even cheat with impunity and have children outside wedlock and go scot free, he basically maintains his freedom to have wanton sex just like when he was a bachelor, and he gets no blame and his wife is advised to stay with him because men are ' naturally polygamous'.


Yet society wants us to believe women benefit more from marriages.


With loss of freedom, loss of former identity ( changing surname even if the man you now bear his name cannot take care of you or provide for you), loss of beauty and youth after having children that belong to another mans lineage and family, horrible unsatisfying sex life in many cases, is forced to overlook cheating husbands behaviour, must balance greatest majority of housework and breadwinning while husband contributes barest minimum to housework. The man might even be jobless but the wife is advised to stay and support her husband and help him grow.

Infact the list of losses is endless]

I had to sign in after years to like this post

.

The western is the same in some homes.

I can take the heat

Wettoid123:


But you know in Africa it doesn't work that way the heat from your husband family alone we frustrate d person,Africa mentality is different from.the western world.

I like your analogy.

It is going to be difficult for you to find a man with a like mind. Good luck to you.

Breaststroke:


I feel you to an extent. If I was given an option between a man and a child to pursue life with, I would take the man over the child because I fancy companionship & intimacy more than being a parent.

I think God knew what He was doing in the Garden of Eden, when he created Eve for Adam. Companionship was foremost on His mind for us, companionship with man was also the major reason he ever created Adam - in my opinion

Children came after the fall, but the way we prioritize them today over and above everything else baffles me. I woke up this morning and felt like curling up in bed with a man, while I read a novel and he fiddles with his phone or tab BUT we are curled up together, kissing & touching in between.......and now I deviate

CHoccolaTE:


That's because misery loves company. Majority of them are in miserable marriages so they want to rope others in with them.

I agree with you

Sterope:
You should tell your mum that. Aren't you a wonderful son!

Some women have effortlessly accepted their god given fate whereas others have continued to deceive themselves by promoting the ever nonsense feminist agenda thereby struggling to live a life of ease, my lovely mother belong to the former, your likes belong to the latter.

CHoccolaTE:
Hahahaha

This topic always pains men

Men are such hypocrites.
They go about declaring that they hate marriages
And have no need for it
Marriage is bondage,
Etc etc

But when women open their mouths to say they are happier without marriages just like men they get angry and forcefully insist that women want and desire marriage

Make I just help you pray for happiness then.

.

midnighter:


You just quoted me from nowhere and started ranting. I dont get your point because nothing you said corresponds to my original post

I was talking about evolutionary factors that influence how society views child-bearing so i dont get where youre coming from

You are the person getting all emotional now and ranting not ME! What are those EVOLUTIONARY FACTORS? IS IT NOT feminisim amongst them? Is feminisim not the MAJOR factor? I told you read and get my point and your here acting like I have beef with you before.

Chukapage:
You are the person getting all emotional now and ranting not ME! What are those EVOLUTIONARY FACTORS? IS IT NOT feminisim amongst them? Is feminisim not the MAJOR factor? I told you read and get my point and your here acting like I have beef with you before.

What does feminism have to do with evolution or biology? Did you read my post at all?

Stop quoting me, you dont make any sense whatsoever.

MissWrite:
Values are and should always be personal for a person to reap any kind of benefit. Society cannot value something for an individual, it can only value something for itself. A society might value marriage because it helps increase its population while providing structure for its growing members. But it doesn't mean every individual would find satisfaction in being drafted to this cause. Some will, others won't.

People who want to be married, but aren't, would be less happy than they could be after their goals are met. People who don't want to be married, but somehow found themselves hitched, would be less happy than they would have been without the commitment. None of these people would necessarily be miserable, depending on how big of a deal marriage is to the individual. A person's happiness depends on so many factors.

Therefore, a comparison of the happiness of married and unmarried people across the board cannot be used to judge which marital status is more beneficial to people in general. In the end, it comes down to the individual. What would make YOU happy or happIER? We are not in a race, competing for who is happiest. We are just trying to serve ourselves the best way we can. And the fact that single people might occasionally admire a cute family; or that married people occasionally envy the freedom of single people doesn't necessarily mean they chose wrongly. Because afterwards, they realise that they wouldn't have had the lasting desire to make the scenario work for themselves.

Let's just be who we are, and do our heart's conviction. It's the only way to be happy.

Indeed people ignore diversity and try to generalise their values on others. There are those who are happier if married and there are those who are happier single

Someone even said one can't be happy without a child.

Breaststroke:


Lol, thanks.

I met a widower 3 months ago, older than me, already has grown kids but really good looking and he acted interested, asked me to pls call him during his 2nd visit to our office (he left his card and a document for my boss) and didn't have my number.

The only snag is the fact that he is a client. Company rules forbid fraternizing with clients but I am not giving up just yet. That sort of man will not want anymore children and won't stress me about it either - I'm hoping

A brilliant assumption @ the bolded.