If she's a househelp in the true sense of the word(Naija wise) not a girl that is underpriviledged and his parents offered to assist her in life then
the chic just hit the Jackpot

I hope the 'love' this silver-spooned guy is professing for our dear househelp is not 'pity'. He might be feeling sorry for her poor condition and thinks he's in love. They are two different and yes one can be mistaken for the other. Love based on pity tend not to last long once the pity factor is removed. Some people naturally 'love' to take care of vulnerable or damaged people. It gives them a sense of purpose.

I suggest he go away for a while, interact and meet other potential brides. If he still feel that the househelp (i hate calling her that) is the only sugar in her tea then, roll out the red carpet and lets start singing kumbaya.

Have you vr watched worlds apart? An househelp may turn out to be more bautiful, brainy,resourceful, respctful, and what have you when given the ame resources a 'queen' has. The only thing the househelp in question here does not have is 'a family who can send her to a higher institution !

@topic

i dont think the guy's in good condition. The girl must have bleeped him badly that he got hooked with her you know, all these wetly guys.
But if indeed it's truly love, they should allow the river flow naturally.

One love

@topic

i dont think the guy's in good condition. The girl must have bleeped him badly that he got hooked with her you know, all these wetly guys.
But if indeed it's truly love, they should allow the river flow naturally.

One love

there is no big deal marrying an househelp cos they r humans like us.it's ya choice not ya parents.i think u r matured enough to get married so u have ya own decision to make no one should make it for ya.all da best.

house help no be person, abi waytin, no be mama born am, so she self nogo born pikin.
lets be realistics in doing things and follow our mind.

papa.

True talk. More courage/momentum is coming.

Yes am sure most would.
She would probably be the best woman ever but be aware cause they are on a different level mentally as yourself.

Its all well and good till she starts showing her 'househelp' traits am sorry to say - cause like an old adage in yoruba goes - 'children who are used to sleeping on the floor, if you placed them on a bed, they would fall out of it' its all good but sha be a bit weary and dont get upset at certain things sge would do cause she doesnt know any better.

so @adeboo would you marry a househelp ?

adeboo:


Its all well and good till she starts showing her 'househelp' traits am sorry to say - cause like an old adage in yoruba goes - 'children who are used to sleeping on the floor, if you placed them on a bed, they would fall out of it' its all good but sha be a bit weary and don't get upset at certain things sge would do cause she doesnt know any better.

You correct but th truth is 1) it takes a humble guy to do this 2)You must ensure first and foremost that she is teachable. If she is not you dare not go into it.

GNature:

so @adeboo would you marry a househelp ?

adeboo, you dey run, answer now!

A house girl is also a human being that can love and be loved. There is nothing wrong in marrying a house girl if there is genuine love between the two. It is easy to fall in love with a pretty, well-behaved house girl if you live with your parents and see her almost everyday. Added to the advantage that she is less likely to resist you, and also costs you less to date. You may think you are in love because of the advantages of easy sex and easy access that you have. So, you need to search yourself very well before you take the final plunge.

If you must marry her, make sure you carry your parents along. Don't rush things now. If the girl is really good as you described, then it will be obvious to your parents later on. A marriage that is tunning the family apart before it was contacted is due for imminent disaster. Use your brain, not your heart.

I was hoping that somebody would address this, as I thought it something that I had merely overlooked, but it seems not to be the case. So, I'll address it myself!

In the first reply to the poster (I believe it was by manulove) the post script says something to the effect that 8 years isn't much.

Again, perhaps I missed something, but what does that mean?

Th guy is actually 8 years older than the househelp. Are you okay now?

8 years? hhmm,

I like the way you reason. you sound very resposible.

Apologies if i'm off-topic. I have neither the time nor patience to read all the thread before saying sth. Why is it that whenever a house-help or a gutter person is being married, it is the man not the woman (mostly) going for the house-help? I skimmed through some of the replies, and most female respondent didnt see anything wrong with that. Reverse positions and your guess is as good as mine. My take is that the story of cinderella is meant for kingdergaton kids not for a mature and analytical mind. I hear ppl talk about love. Who loves who? And why? Then again, if having a househelp as a wife will make you happy go for it. I'm not against it just thinking aloud!

Prof.

omo he no matter oh

Never not in this lifetime even my parent will never support that decision

close minded folks.

why not, is she not a woman too?

yes i might.hes a human being isnt he?

there was this lesson teacher/house help that used to stay with us couple of  years back.
he was a gradute,good -lookn,brilliant and all-but luck wasnt forth coming in gettn a good job.

i took to him immediately i saw him-he was like a  big brother i never had-we did basically everything together-talked to him about anything.My  mum initially wasnt comfortable with the familiarity-of course u know how parents are but we had a long talk and i assured  her that i wldnt do what she wldnt be happy with.

okay enough of that.He won a visa lottery  in feb last yr and i was  the first person  he called,we cried together,screamed together and laughed together.He lives in Florida now and he has a very good job.

Hes coming over to Maryland next month and i can't wait to see him.
 
Bottom line-------its who u really are as a person not what u are dat matters to me.

I really don't know about other African countries but it seems it's only Nigerian women who are so selective in their quest of a husband. i know for sure a Nigerian man with degree to his credit would marry a house help with all the attribute of a good wife a man want.

If your friend wants people to respect his wife, he should not marry her. Imagine this: all the visitors that have been coming to your house must have known she was your househelp or they would have taken her for your sister of cousin, if she was so treated. How do you now go and tell them you want to marry her. Your friend should have taken her like a sister. there are some relationships that are better not started.

Your friend should also consider the case of his friends who know her as a househelp. Will they find it easy to respect her as his wife? Yeah, the house help has a right to live a happy life, but she will also find it happier if she lives completely away from her past as a househelp. there are some jobs that one can not be proud of. Househelp is one of them.

Please tell your friend to find love elsewhere and take the girl as a sister.

minute:

yes i might.hes a human being isnt he?

there was this lesson teacher/house help that used to stay with us couple of years back.
he was a gradute,good -lookn,brilliant and all-but luck wasnt forth coming in gettn a good job.

i took to him immediately i saw him-he was like a big brother i never had-we did basically everything together-talked to him about anything.My mum initially wasnt comfortable with the familiarity-of course u know how parents are but we had a long talk and i assured her that i wldnt do what she wldnt be happy with.

okay enough of that.He won a visa lottery in feb last yr and i was the first person he called,we cried together,screamed together and laughed together.He lives in Florida now and he has a very good job.

Hes coming over to Maryland next month and i can't wait to see him.

Bottom line-------its who u really are as a person not what u are that matters to me.

That was an exceptional "househelp". Househelps are most of the time, not graduates. that is where class issues come in. I think the man was just a man waiting for an opportunity. A househelp in Nigerian context is clearly different from this picture.

Like Seun said, anyone who waits for others to respect his wife before he respects her does not deserve to have her as his wife. Even if I marry bigfoot, any friend or relative or yes, even parent, who has a problem with simply respecting my spouse, is not welcome in my home. Excuse me, but the behavior of the so-called entitled upper-class, is no recommendation. Daddy's money or name will not necessarily make a good wife. Or a good human being, for that matter. This master-servant mentality of Nigerians really has to stop.

Who can find a virteous woman 4 her worth is far above rubies(treasure).A virteous woman can be a slave,poor girl,house help,banker,doctor,lawyer or watever.1 tin i can tel u is dat dey are hard 2 find caus dey are lik gold which are nt found on d surfaces,just lik ultimate search.If u knw u hav found 1 pls hold it tight b4 sum1 smarter dan u outrun u.Pls do everytin within ur reach 2 convince ur parents.Who are those people ur parent respect & listen 2.Parental blessin & backin is gud in mariage.Hope u guys are nt havin sex caus sex is nt luv.Pls dnt fool urself sex blinds luv btw 2 unmarried person & opens infatuation.Cheers & gudluck.

hmmm if your son/daughter tells you mum/dad i would like to marry the house help how would you take it.

i think it is easier to say whats the big deal when we look at it from a third party view but i bet you that if tables are turned some of us saying whats the big deal na we go first kill person

good lurk.