Do you really want to know the truth?

Imagine the girl in question is your only daughter, you sent her to school and she keeps hanging at her boyfriend's house before going and coming from school. Will keep patting her on her back knowing what she's doing.
Forget the fact that her parent knows you, do they also know that you have been camping thier daughter, enjoying the benefits of matrimony without wedding her?

What you are doing is morally WRONG! and its a sin (if i want to sound religious). Let forget religion now, this is morally, morally WRONG!

What suprises me most is that you have the audacity to come on a public platform like this to post this thread.

To the lady in question.
I pity her, she is selling herself so cheaply , but why are our ladies so cheap these days? OMG! Are there still decent ladies out there.
I no fit talk again

Shior

i really dont know what the anti-mother brigade are saying here.

some are even going so far as to start bringing up wild stories of whatever.

they are not married- simple as abc. Any responsible mother would do the same thing his mother did.

IF they get married, then people should start complaining about mother's interference.

like it's so unusual to see girls camping out at their boyfriend's house anyway? Does that mean it's right? And is that a guarantee they'll get married? No it's not.

now, will the girl still complain if the mother meets other girlfriends at the guy's place and gives them their marching orders?

Whao!!! so you are 11 years older than the girl. Aba!!! this is child abuse ooooooooooooo.
I will advice you look for someone who is close to your age, the age gap is too much. This is my advice sha!!

We are well known together. Everybody knows her in my family and yes she has been introduced formally to my family. My siblings , dad , mum , nephew , nieces and cousins know her. Hell we've both gone to my uncle's place in Ibadan together.

Bros u'r mum is a practicing and practical christian, No living together until after the wedding. You can't keep goat and yam together(goat go ever eat yam) Your are not suppose to do until u'r married.

My wife when we are dating stays with my sisters anytime she visits our family house, as a respect for my parents because I know how they will see it. Let u'r babe understand u'r mum means no disrespect to her. She just want you two to do the right thing. NO ACTION UNTIL AFTER THE WEDDING pam

She did the right thing

so you are 11 years older than the girl

did he say he's 11 years older than the girlfriend?

i missed that part.

OMG- this guy [op]- and you're here complaining about what your mother did?

how long are you planning on living this bachelor life nah!

To the lady in question.
I pity her,  she is selling herself so cheaply , but why are our ladies so cheap these days? OMG! Are there still decent ladies out there.
I no fit talk again

Uncle u'r being too harsh the girl is simply maintaining her territory, before another girl go take her man

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@apocalypse,

You are much more older than this girl, from your thread you are 11 years older than her.

I will still advice you go for girl close to your age, the age gap is too wide, my brother.

I can imagine when you will be 50 and she will be 39. Think about it.!!!

Guy, whether u like am or not,
Ur baby 4 use her head know say she suppose cut out when ur mumsy show,
Haba, which kin format be dat one naa,
Though, ur mumsy should've let u do it urself, but, if say ur babe n u been use una head, mumsy 4 no see am chase

@post,

Your age difference with the girl demands that you should handle the situation more maturedly. To me, the girl has no implication of what she is doing (i.e. staying at another man's house for days).

Your mother's action is simple and prolly same thing every mother would have done. She looked at the child (yes that's what she is) and asked herself 'what would I do if she was my daughter?' . She acted accordingly.

ego_law75:

@apocalypse,

You are much more older than this girl, from your thread you are 11 years older than her.

I will still advice you go for girl close to your age, the age gap is too wide, my brother.

I can imagine when you will be 50 and she will be 39. Think about it.!!!

Did the poster tell you that age is a problem  

Is the girl not in her twenties   and the guy in his early thirties   So what is wrong there  

na wa for nigerians.

apocalypse:

@ all
I still do not appreciate what mum did but I guess there's nothing I can do about that.
I wouldn't blame my girlfriend in this case and anyone saying she's wayward can't tell me they don't have intimacy with their girlfriend/boyfriend.
Also as I have pointed out in my replies : she's not a live in lover
@ asha80
I agree with a lot of what you said but I need to find a tactical way of dealing with this problem

Look bros i understand the psyochological angle or issue you are going through but what has happened has happened.

Try and convince the girl that even though your mum went over the top that she meant well however you have to make the girl understand that you are still in charge of your affairs(to be honest i am not too sure how you are going to do this)

Then most importantly you need to sit down with your mum and discuss your life with her.Let her know how appreciative you have been for all the things and sacrfices that she has done for you.Let her also know that you cherish her intentions of why she did what you did but you do not like the way she did it.

Let her know that you are now in your 30s and no longer a teenager or in your 20s and you need to be accorded respect too.Try and do this in a soothing voice and when she is calm.

.

@poster,

Your mum was wrong with what she did and you need to let her know in a gentle but firm manner, you are the man of your destiny and she can not dictate to you at your age. Your babe should also have cut out immediately your mum arrived in order to maintain the good girl image, you know marriage in naija is political, so she needs to play the game well. All the people saying it is wrong for your babe to sleep over in your house are just hypocrites, many of them are responding to your post from their boyfriend's house or been camping some babe at home for the past week.

All the people saying it is wrong for your babe to sleep over in your house are just hypocrites, many of them are responding to your post from their boyfriend's house or been camping some babe at home for the past week.

lmao!!

but even if true, the girl should vamoose when the mother arrives nah.

una never see ehana mother sha.

is it because his mum was being polite. Better pray you dont come across the mum wey go remove earring and tie wrapper for you.

ready for battle.

your baby 4 use her head know say she suppose cut out when your mumsy show,
Haba, which kin format be dat one naa,
Though, your mumsy should've let u do it urself, but, if say your babe n u been use una head, mumsy 4 no see am chase

true talk.

Almost same story.

my mum came visiting on a thursday and my sister wanted to see her boyfriend that weekend(saturday) because she haven't seen him for about 3 weeks(so she said).

she thought because my parents, siblings and everyone in my family knows her boyfriend, she has the right to pass the night at his house.when she came back the next day morning, my mum warned her not to sleep in a guy's house who haven't paid her bride price.my mum was so angry that when her boyfriend came to the house to see her, she told him never to allow my sister sleep over at his place again untill he has come to pay her bride price.

Though he has proposed but they are yet to fix a date for the wedding.

That "little drama"only shows how much my mum loves them.

my sis(26 yrs) and her boyfriend is 33yrs.

ur girlfriend should be happy that she has a wonderfull mother-inlaw.

lol this story is funny, its what any decent mother with a daughter will or should do. your girlfriend was wrong to take offense! other than that theres no problem, you can either obey your mother and wait until you are both married or you can be stayin at hers from now on.
tbh i dont really think young girls should be spending soo much time at thier bf houses,it doesnt look good, not for any reason than that ive noticed guys dont tend to respect girls than hang around too much

That girl get mind. She saw her future mother in law and she still wan complete her away match. Any mother will take that as insulting.

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@ Poster
ur mum was right in everytin she did. Ur mum has never told u any negative tin about ur girl, which means she is not against d relationship. Knowing the Christian level of ur mum, ur girl would have gone back as ur mum came. & ur mum did it on her own so she will be sure ur girl will not come 2 stay long again. Becos if u do it on ur own, u will stage it. Becos ur mum is seeing it as fornication & protect d girl more. & I advice u don't let ur mum 2 understand u are tellin her not 2 come 2 ur house unknown becos of dis issue, if not u will be causin more war. Just make ur girl understand & relate wit ur mum. U can handle it, just relax man.

apocalypse:

@ unclebros
Your comments was totally uncalled for. Do you or do you not get intimate with your girlfriend and if you are married did you not have carnal knowledge of your wife before marriage , if you did , then from your comment your wife/girlfriend isn't decent.

is anything preventing you from making an honest woman out of this girl since you're sensitive about her?

i hope dem never put bath water for your stew sha.

other people do it (ie shack up), but they dont hang around for the mother to watch the free video, is all anyone is trying to say.

@ Poster
ur mum was right in everytin she did. Ur mum has never told u any negative tin about ur girl, which means she is not against d relationship. Knowing the Christian level of ur mum, ur girl would have gone back as ur mum came. & ur mum did it on her own so she will be sure ur girl will not come 2 stay long again. Becos if u do it on ur own, u will stage it. Becos ur mum is seeing it as fornication & protect d girl more. & I advice u don't let ur mum 2 understand u are tellin her not 2 come 2 ur house unknown becos of dis issue, if not u will be causin more war. Just make ur girl understand & relate wit ur mum. U can handle it, just relax man.

[size=16pt]already sleeps over, and does everything a wife would do etc, mschew , na woman de lose last last [/size]

guy u go happy say your girl no carry bruises go house. if na my mum or my girl mum sorry o. the story for long.

@ OP
You are totally missing the point. It's not about you guys having sexx. . . obviously u can do that anywhere but it's one thing for your mom to kinda sorta know you might be having sexx, it quite another to see evidence of it.

Your girlfriend showed a complete disregard for your mother and even for herself. What would it have cost her to leave as soon as your mom arrived? Nothing that's what but nooo, she sat down there playing matan gida coz she'd just die if she didn't get a piece of your abunna for a few days.

My grandmama has a name for that kinda behavior . . Agarasha! (Pls don't ask me to translate.)

She should be on her knees thanking your mom for treating her like a gem instead of just another piece of rock.

By the way, I'm seriously rolling my eyes and Laughing my backside off @ "I am a man! I pay my bills, It is my house!  I wear my shoes myself! I even fed myself this morning *macho grunts* " GMFB!!!

Eejits!

Your mum was absolutely Right.

My own mama go do worse pass that one own.

DON'T YOU DARE ASK YOUR MUM NOT TO COME TO YOUR HOUSE UNLESS SHE IS INVITED OH!


All this so called westernizationsef. If you enjoy everything fuly while still dating wetin go remain when you na marry?

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Brother, your mum is a good woman. I would want a prospective MIL to my daughter to do exactly the same thing. A lot of things do go wrong and women feel worse if there has been a lot of intimacy prior to BREAK UP. Let that girl be until further notice.

.

ur mum was right

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