MedicH:
when u said he eats your food i got a lot of mixed feelings. pls which food exactly? the one he eats before he eat or the one he eats after he eat

baby124:

Praying 5 times a day is no joke. Even Christians that are mandated to pray just once sef, a lot of us don’t pray. OP is a moderate Muslim who married a conc Muslim. This is the root of the problem. The husband knew this before marriage but believes her could make her pray more. I am honestly tired of people trying to force others to change.

He accepted her as a moderate Muslim and married her, he really should not be blaming her. Rather he should be coaxing her back into a regular prayer life by example and praying as a family. In my own family my father was the prayer warrior and not my mother. But when he called for family prayer or prayer during certain occasions we must respect and join him in prayer.

There is no mandate on one spouse being the prayer warrior. Where one is weak, the other has to try their best to fill in the gap until they come to an understanding. Not by insults and threats that can do permanent damage to the marriage. She will never forget what he said and how he treated her you know?

arinpe16:


I'm not fighting God. I'm not used to praying 5 times daily before we met and he knows. I think he's only using it as an excuse. Is it enough reason to.want.a.divorce?

crackhaus:
My only issue here is that he's not talking to you but still eating your food.
Does that man like his life at all...

MisterGrace:
You have the right to live the way you want provided you aren't infringing on anyone's rights or breaking the law of the country.

You can get a man of your choice even at 35 years of age.

Your husband seems to be one of these extremists who forces their beliefs down the throats of others.

You deserve happiness.

donbachi:
Pray without ceasing...u dont know when u will pray everlasting happiness into ur home.

arinpe16:


I'm not fighting God. I'm not used to praying 5 times daily before we met and he knows. I think he's only using it as an excuse. Is it enough reason to.want.a.divorce?

harbarzzy:
hypocrite!

arinpe16:


I'm not fighting God. I'm not used to praying 5 times daily before we met and he knows. I think he's only using it as an excuse. Is it enough reason to.want.a.divorce?

arinpe16:
@baby124, He prays regularly and we have kids.
@pharmagba Did you read the post at all? He's the one telling me that I'm not marketable again. As per obedience and humility, don't judge please. You do not know me.
He doesn't set good example for me. He will pray, eat my food, have sex with me and still keep malice with me? Is that what the Qur'an says about religion? We've been together for 5 years and he didn't see it as a big deal. Why is it now that everything good is coming his way, he suddenly start seeing me as being a devil, not marketable and what not.
So, I'll have to pray for him to love me and do his right? Just imagine. He can't even correct me without threatening me with divorce. Is being divorced a disease?

As long as I never wish him bad and I'm trying, he should know I'll get there, but it takes time. So, i ask again, is divorce the answer?

arinpe16:
Good evening everyone. Please I need your advice.

My husband has been keeping malice with me because I don't pray regularly again (we're Muslims) and he's threatening to divorce me (we only did court wedding and yet to do Nikkah).

He's eats my food but doesn't talk to me. This has been going on for over a year now and it's getting worse. Can I tell his parents? They are strong Muslims and I'm afraid they may blame me more. He also doesn't give me money anymore. I'm tired of his stinginess and he's very insensitive. He believes I'm a devil since I don't pray even though things have changed for the better for him since we met.

He also doesn't believe I can get a husband since I'm close to 35. Please, I'm confused. I don't know what to do.

dominique:
Try and pray five times a day, with time you'll get used to it. My husband also complains about my non praying regularly so I'm trying to adjust. It's not easy but achievable.

MisterGrace:


All these religious demons won't let me be.

cricifixo:
Try adjusting woman or are you fighting God?

johnad3:
Is it not written in your Quran you should honor whatever your husband tells you to do? Besides, what prompted you not to pray again? You said he's gives you money before but now he's doesn't, that's shows he's not happy with you. Let me ask you this, when your son disobey you, how are you gonna feel? please answer the question

Babinski:


I see a lot of people commenting as if the husband is devout and the woman's lack of religiosity is the problem.
If the husband is devout, is he following the recommendations of the Quran (i.e. Quran 4:34) in handling the matter? Obviously no. He still sleeps with her and eats her food. Furthermore he is avoiding his financial duties to the family by being stingy and keeping malice. So where is the devoutness on his part?

He knew the lady's weaknesses well before he married her and they have been married for 5 years and this attitude just started about a year ago.

The bottom line is either he wants another wife and he is looking for a flimsy excuse because he has been bound with a court wedding already, or there is something about the issue much deeper than what we have read from the lady. The religious angle to his approach is probably to look for an appealing reason to his parents when he makes the final move.

cococandy:


So a wife like a child to a Muslim man?



So much nonsense on this useless forum

oyinda1599:
Kill Bawo...

LyfeJennings:
My candid advice

U self try
I know it's not easy but try
Nothing like a praying wife


Even if he didn't meet U, life would still be beautiful for him.

I love this above statement my brother, many Nigerian women had turned themselves to automatic fortune to men, they believed man's prosperity is tied to their destiny....... Your life has changed after you married me; that is their common statement. Even if it was so, must it be entitlement.





Just try
I don't think I'd want to marry a woman who doesn't pray also.
Just tryyyyyyyyyyyyyy

arinpe16:


I'm not fighting God. I'm not used to praying 5 times daily before we met and he knows. I think he's only using it as an excuse. Is it enough reason to.want.a.divorce?

crackhaus:
My only issue here is that he's not talking to you but still eating your food.
Does that man like his life at all...

umarshehu58:

He believed you could change.

But a 35yr old person should be praying without somebody's order. He doesn't want his children to end up like you. If you can't pray, how would you tell your children to pray?

Do we muslims do court wedding? I don't know

pharmagba:

I need to be blunt with you since you asked for my advice

You are not wise at all.
Look at the reason you are giving, that you are not praying regularly

Praying to God is a test of humility. A great man once said, "if I want to humble a man, I ask him how long he prays"
It simply means you are full of pride and very disobedient wife. You are even considering your marketability when you eventually leaves his house.
If things continue like this let me tell you what will happen, he will definitely throw you out of his life, not only his house and he will get a better lady and live happily ever after and you may also get a another husband who will also throw you out after some time. Why? Simple. It is because you will display your rotten character.


My advice if you really want to make things work
Be humble to your husband, respect and obey him. It is not to much to pray even if it is 100times daily. Any woman that humbles herself and respect her husband especially if the man is Godly, will always find favour with him. In fact such men will go out of their ways to satisfy and make her happy but if you don't respect him forget about getting any dime from him.
You have wasted so much time, start the amendment today. Thank God he had not told his parent.

A word is enough for the wise

CoolAmbience:



Get use to praying 5 times or even more.

There is no such thing as 'I am not use to'. Learn and get use to it!

Do this, if not for anything but to get to the root of why he wants a divorce since you suspect your not praying 5 times couldn't be reason enough for him to want a divorce.

No vex, but you women can be unnecessarily 'heady' sometimes.

We, men, our own dey our body too. As for me, when it comes to religion and worship, liberty is utmost.

For instance, my family is in church now but I am home 'cos I didn't feel like going to church. Whenever, I do not feel like going, nothing changes that.

In fact, I can't really say I belong to any religion, though I believe strongly in God.

You and your husband should talk and appreciate that stuff like religion and worship aren't what should come between people. They are personal between us and God.

Moreover, does praying 5 or 10 times determine once state of relations with God?

arinpe16:
Good evening everyone. Please I need your advice.

My husband has been keeping malice with me because I don't pray regularly again (we're Muslims) and he's threatening to divorce me (we only did court wedding and yet to do Nikkah).

He's eats my food but doesn't talk to me. This has been going on for over a year now and it's getting worse. Can I tell his parents? They are strong Muslims and I'm afraid they may blame me more. He also doesn't give me money anymore. I'm tired of his stinginess and he's very insensitive. He believes I'm a devil since I don't pray even though things have changed for the better for him since we met.

He also doesn't believe I can get a husband since I'm close to 35. Please, I'm confused. I don't know what to do.