.

midnighter:


You dont know anything about yourself! How can you say theres nothing like a moderate Muslim?

Up till now Turkey has been enforcing moderate Islam to the point where they couldnt even wear hijab in public institutions. Iraq and Syria have both been secular Muslim states for over 50 years

I think youre the one who has been roasting in ignorance all this while.

Assalamu alaikom!

Yes, a moderate Nigerian is a Nigerian that Goes to bank to rob, drives on the wrong side of the road, and flout all the laws in the constitution.
Since your definition of a moderate Muslim is a Muslim that doesn’t pray 5 times daily, and drinks alcohol .
Clowns everywhere! Lmfao!

Sukueponmalu:

You know nothing about Islam.
There’s nothing as moderate or conc Muslim .
The 5 times daily prayer is not optional for muslims . It’s a cumpulsion . Each of these 5 activities barely take 5 minutes .
If she cannot do what her husband wants , then she should leave and never look back!
Aren’t no man want his kids raised in a wrong way.

and what if it's the man who is defaulting in this prayer thing will the woman also go? This is unfair. How can a trivial matter like this amount to devoirce if not that the man has passed mosque gate

[quote author=arinpe16 post=83883493]Good evening everyone. Please I need your advice.

My husband has been keeping malice with me because I don't pray regularly again (we're Muslims) and he's threatening to divorce me (we only did court wedding and yet to do Nikkah).

He's eats my food but doesn't talk to me. This has been going on for over a year now and it's getting worse. Can I tell his parents? They are strong Muslims and I'm afraid they may blame me more. He also doesn't give me money anymore. I'm tired of his stinginess and he's very insensitive. He believes I'm a devil since I don't pray even though things have changed for the better for him since we met.

He also doesn't believe I can get a husband since I'm close to 35. Please, I'm confused. I don't know what to do.[/quote

When it comes to marriage , try to marry what suits you, he must love you for who u are and u must also love him for who he is and must agree to accept each other both ways and NOT in a particular way...U know you are not those religious type but yet you accept to marry an imam( maybe a sheikh) who may believe only until u pray 5times daily that u will be closer to Almighty Allah...Your husband is scared of your faith....as it is, is either you obey him , or divorce and go get married to your kind of type...I understand how u feel, made me remembered my days in the barracks when Dad will be chasing us to the mosque for salats...and if I were u I will manage to adjust for maybe a year , after which I must have got him back and should I'm unable to continue , I will go back to my real self....there is no need playing religion via just prayers.

I am a man and the truth is every man wants a prayerful wife... I believe u are not always together as he will definitely go to work. Try and pray as much as u can and don't pretend about it, especially when he is around, and if his attitude doesn't change.....Hmmn, he is a Muslim and I think second wife is loading because meh ni olorun wi

Elytron1604:
and what if it's the man who is defaulting in this prayer thing will the woman also go? This is unfair. How can a trivial matter like this amount to devoirce if not that the man has passed mosque gate

This is not a trivial matter.

LadySarah:
In Marriage You compromise sometimes.Yes.If it is not harmful and wont change ur name.
You can start by joining him in prayers,gradually You pick up.

Though he isnt right to threaten You with divorce.I Dont really know what You ppls religion says.
Theres nothing worth arguing here.
Ma,choose ur battle wisely.

Ganjababe and Zaynie,i think they'll advice better.

Iya, I'll have to sit this one out.
Until the full story emerges sha.

imninja:



He wants to get a new younger wife

gbam!

Leave for this husband scarcity? Like say if na you,you go leave.

kestolove95:
Then leave na...must u tell us? Nonsense

kestolove95:
Then leave na...must u tell us? Nonsense

One day, you too will be in her shoes.

I think your husband still loves u.
He just want you to improve in prayers.
When he started u, may be u didn't do more to stop him. Then he got used to it and it kept growing.
You are helping him to save money. He comes back and sees food on the table when he actually knows that he stopped giving u money for food.
That made him know that u love him so much and that was y he made u believe that u cant find another man to remarry. By telling this, will make u wave the idea of remarriage. And keep u close to him.
Don't be surprised that his parents might be aware of this. But are waiting for your complain.
Since he knows how u pray before u got married to him and he is still acting this way. He loves u but believed that he will change u. And that change is what he is working on but u spiced it by always dropping a delicious meal when he comes back.

ADVICE
Any time you want to pray, call him to join u in the prayers. By the way, when two or more pray together, love grows, presence of God is always there.
Call him as a wife calls her dear husband and speak reason to him in a passionate way..
Once in a while just tell him that there's no food because there's no money to prepare it. And be serious about it.
Before u go to his parents to complain make sure that u find out if he secretly told his parents. This will help u to prepare yourself.
Make him understand that God still hears your prayers because you never lied to him before marriage.
Ask him if there's any other thing that's disturbing him. Ask him, to tell u, what u your offence and u will try to make amend. Dont be surprised there are other things he might open up.
I don't think thos prayer is the major reason for his silence.
Continue to respect and show love to him.
Peace be unto u dear

arinpe16:
@baby124, He prays regularly and we have kids.
@pharmagba Did you read the post at all? He's the one telling me that I'm not marketable again. As per obedience and humility, don't judge please. You do not know me.
He doesn't set good example for me. He will pray, eat my food, have sex with me and still keep malice with me? Is that what the Qur'an says about religion? We've been together for 5 years and he didn't see it as a big deal. Why is it now that everything good is coming his way, he suddenly start seeing me as being a devil, not marketable and what not.
So, I'll have to pray for him to love me and do his right? Just imagine. He can't even correct me without threatening me with divorce. Is being divorced a disease?

As long as I never wish him bad and I'm trying, he should know I'll get there, but it takes time. So, i ask again, is divorce the answer?

Why are you making it look like whatever good thing that might be coming his way is happening because of you?
What kind of deluded mentality is that?
Woman! If you cannot pray 5 times daily like Allah SWT has commanded. Then leave that fucking house!
You’re not only disobeying your creator by not observing solah.
you’re also disobeying your husband.
I can see that you have some sort of stupid entitlement mentality .
Lord knows I hate women that say this kind bullshit, at the bolded.

.

Marriage is not a bed of roses. Most times, people influence people to change. Aside the prayers, list the things you do before that you don't do anymore and vice versa, then you revisit and act upon them. It takes more than love to keep marriage. Its your head cooking up stories that because he became rich, he's trying to leave. You know your husband better than everybody else, try doing his likes, pet me, make hin feel like a king that he is, talk to him romantically and know where you're getting it wrong. Even if you don't observe the five times prayer before marriage, there's room for improvement. You ought to have improved on your fate. My sister, do anything in your power to save your marriage, it's worth it. Kalas

A devout Muslim understand what our 5 times daily prayer means. It is compulsory.

kestolove95:
bye bye to yeye boifrnd

you wan follow lalasticlala go abi?

Lots of couples would be seperated on social media. It's alarming the rate at which ladies bring forth their marital issues to the internet.

And for those advising her, have you ever seen anyone who claims to be wrong in all ramifications especially in marital issues.? Rarely would you. We are too judgemental and sentimental which shouldn't be in issues like this.

Madam, you have an elderly person your husband listens to and respect so much. Though, I don't subscribe in bringing third parties to marital conflict but when it comes to threat of divorce, there need to be an urgent intervention. Talk to the person, the person I believe would call both parties and things would be amicably resolved.

Lots of these folks advising you are single. They don't understand marriage a bit. Will they marry you if you divorce? If yes, will they take care of the kids like theirs? I doubt.

Tell yourself the truth, act wisely. Your home is your home. Try your best to keep it intact. You will be happy at the long run. Every marriage has a problem, this is yours, face it and resolve it. God will help you

Patience and endurance matters ...

madridguy:
A devout Muslim understand what our 5 times daily prayer means. It is compulsory.

she is tired of hitting her head on the ground for Mohammed

arinpe16:
Good evening everyone. Please I need your advice.

My husband has been keeping malice with me because I don't pray regularly again (we're Muslims) and he's threatening to divorce me (we only did court wedding and yet to do Nikkah).

He's eats my food but doesn't talk to me. This has been going on for over a year now and it's getting worse. Can I tell his parents? They are strong Muslims and I'm afraid they may blame me more. He also doesn't give me money anymore. I'm tired of his stinginess and he's very insensitive. He believes I'm a devil since I don't pray even though things have changed for the better for him since we met.

He also doesn't believe I can get a husband since I'm close to 35. Please, I'm confused. I don't know what to do.

He gave you quit notice over a year ago and you are still hanging around. Are you waiting for him to toss you out in a body bag?
When a man is tired, leave him alone. He has found another woman. The earlier you come to that resolution, the better. At least you can leave the house in one piece. He doesn't deserve you. There is plenty of good life to live beyond 35.

Oiza131:
Marriage is not a bed of roses. Most times, people influence people to change. Aside the prayers, list the things you do before that you don't do anymore and vice versa, then you revisit and act upon them. It takes more than love to keep marriage. Its your head cooking up stories that because he became rich, he's trying to leave. You know your husband better than everybody else, try doing his likes, pet me, make hin feel like a king that he is, talk to him romantically and know where you're getting it wrong. Even if you don't observe the five times prayer before marriage, there's room for improvement. You ought to have improved on your fate. My sister, do anything in your power to save your marriage, it's worth it. Kalas

God bless you, ma'am

dominique:
Try and pray five times a day, with time you'll get used to it. My husband also complains about my non praying regularly so I'm trying to adjust. It's not easy but achievable.

lolz, are you also a Muslim?

It is impossible for love to inflict pain. More like power struggle for control....

Cutehector:
Abeg begin to kabash in his house o.. I duno if you muslims speak in tongues but please start so he will notice...shebi he wants prayers, he will get tired....

The best thing to do is to report him to his parents and also talk to your parents to plead on your behalf, divorce should not even arise in a family at all.

No one is praying to the prophet of ALLAH PBUH but to Allah. If she still needs her home, she should be a good wife.

Enemyofpeace:
she is tired of hitting her head on the ground for Mohammed

madridguy:
No one is praying to the prophet of ALLAH PBUH but to Allah. If she still needs her home, she should be a good wife.

by hitting her head on the floor abi?

He does not give you money anymore...now you will endeavor to earn your own money and not solely depends on a man for, you say at 35 your husband think you have passed you sell by date, it is important you focus on being an independent woman rather than looking for another husband that will put you in bondage.

Yes

Enemyofpeace:
by hitting her head on the floor abi?

arinpe16:
Good evening everyone. Please I need your advice.

My husband has been keeping malice with me because I don't pray regularly again (we're Muslims) and he's threatening to divorce me (we only did court wedding and yet to do Nikkah).

He's eats my food but doesn't talk to me. This has been going on for over a year now and it's getting worse. Can I tell his parents? They are strong Muslims and I'm afraid they may blame me more. He also doesn't give me money anymore. I'm tired of his stinginess and he's very insensitive. He believes I'm a devil since I don't pray even though things have changed for the better for him since we met.

He also doesn't believe I can get a husband since I'm close to 35. Please, I'm confused. I don't know what to do.

Sister, why did you stop praying?
He stopped giving you money but he's still eating your food?

Start praying.

Forget the 35 years things, even women of 50 in good shape and tidy outlook will get suitors.

Again, go back to the prayers.

madridguy:
Yes

she won't. To marry because of religion no be by force

Her husband married her as a Muslim so observing her 5 times daily obligatory prayer na by force.

Enemyofpeace:
she won't. To marry because of religion no be by force