A penis' Diary (masturbation)

My real name is pen!s, but I have different aliases though.

Some call me private part (thats the modest ones o), prickk (for the agberos and street boys), d!ck and cockk (the oyibos and Nigerian oyibo wannabes), John Thomas, banana (nairaland drug sellers), gbola (bobrisky), rooster (Seun and his mods ), just to mention a few.

My only problem is that I don't have sense . I stand at attention both when I need to and when I don't need to.

You see John? I so much dislike him but anytime he calls me, I still answer whether I want to or not. I don't know the kind of jazz he's using .

Oh! Sorry, John is my owner.

Everyday, I'm always locked behind different textures of clothes, I don't come out o. I don't even know what's so special about me sha.

The only moment when he manages to let me out, I don't see anyone around. I've always wondered if there's any other person like me .

Yes... Yes... I just remembered something. I use to see someone like me in his phone and another person that doesn't look like me (that one is very fine sha... With curly hair ). How come he doesn't use to carry me to that other fine someone like the other people in his phone do is what I wonder, because I'll like to be friends with it.

Anytime he let's me out and I get relief to receive small fresh air, he begins to beat me, he won't stop till I cry.

Not once, not twice... Maybe four times beating a day. He first starts by stroking my head gently, oiling my body ... But before you say jack he grabs my neck , pulls my head, choke me with a very tight grip, I can rarely breath in those moments. Which kind domestic violence be this

Sometimes he degrades me totally by even spitting on me, depending on the intensity of the beating.

Most times, I've bruises all over my body and I'll not be able to bath for days because of the pain I'll feel.

After all the beatings here and there, he becomes sober and promises not to do it again.

But tomorrow, I'll be sleeping je je je where he looked me up, he will come and wake me, show me that kind of video he always shows me... Me too will stand like mumu and another round of beating will start. You see why I said I don't have sense

Please other pen!ses out there, is this how your oga maltreats you
Try come to my rescue if you ever come across this diary... Or maybe I'll be dead before then sha.

Also bring along the cookie because I heard him talking about how he must eat one onyiye's cookie.
I think cookie is the other stuff I saw on his phone, that one that use to make me stand at attention like a Nigerian soldier.

Anyway whatever it is, the name sounds nice and I can't wait to see what a cookie looks like.
Maybe when onyiye gives it to him, he'll stop beating me.

Peace. Penis
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Guys easy on your members, they too need some rest and respect