drmikeadams:
from some comments here ,u go know say some people here dey maltreat dere house help

you mean tonyebarcanista and co.

ezugegere:


If she's not comfortable with the girl staying with them, she should take her back to her parents. Was she not the one that brought her in?
No justification for mistreating another's child. It is wickedness!

Absolutely bro! Returning her to her parents is the most appropriate thing to do. It is obvious that she isn't comfortable with the girl staying at home with them, and has even voiced her concern to the husband (in form of accusation).

How someone will justify a woman not buying Christmas clothes for her house help just because she is a help or that the husband is showing interest is horrible. Yet you see them claiming Nigeria is bad, a woman who is obviously wicked is being praised by her ilk. Nairaland is an amazing place.

SEGLIZ:

you mean tonyebarcanista and co.

Na u talk ham

TonyeBarcanita:

I am sure you saw the apostrophe symbol in the "woman"? Or is it that you don't know what it means?

2. A 15 year old is a teenager, an adolescent and not a child. And 15 year old get pregnant in case you don't know. Also do know that at age 15 some people are already done with secondary school, including some of my siblings.

3. Being a relative of madam is one reason the wife may be suspicious. It would have been different if she was his own relative.

Like I said earlier, a 15 year old is not a CHILD! Yes, OP may not be having affair with her but Madam isn't comfortable with her around anymore. Get the message!

I am a guy but I understand madam's angle!

Btw

tonyebarcanista............
na oversabi dey make àgbède short, that oversabi don dey worry you.
now give us the definition of child.
I child is the singular form of children!?
a young person especially between infancy and youth.
a son or daughter of human parents.
a son or daughter of any age.
that girl is still a child, even you are still a child to your parents.
that madam is no longer comfortable with the girl is no issue but a no good woman that don't want no one to benefit from her.
mind you if this girl is sent of oga niece would suffer same fate.

drmikeadams:


Na u talk ham

I don take cover o.

You were supposed to even slap her mouth for having the audacity to accuse you of sleeping with your 15yr old help - that sort of accusation is not something you sweep under the carpet just like that, because it's only a matter of time before she tells her mother/sisters/friends about what she thinks, and then your matter will become the latest gossip.

Just yesterday I mentioned a known fact that it is a woman thing to always want to put men in the middle of issues. If it's not issue with MIL, it will be with SIL...even their own friends become enemies after a while. The female under-age helps are still not safe in their hands.
As long as the person is someone with a punaní like them, there will always be competition and a man will be in the middle.

If I were you, I would make sure she takes the girl back to the village because believe me, the life of that 15yr old girl will never remain the same in your house after this incident - her maltreatment has just begun.

I wonder what it is about an uneducated 15yr old girl that a grown woman would be so insecure about...amazing.

It's a lose-lose situation for u op

This stuff is common among ladies and female house helps.

You better remove any emotional attachment you have to the house-help. Her days are already numbered in that house. If you support her too much, more people will feel your catching feelings from the girl. Na your wife people, send her home jejerly.

Sigh!

You made a huge mistake by attacking your wife on behalf of the girl. I am afraid your wife will take it out on her in the future. You even call your wife wicked. You don't call her wicked just because she refused to buy clothes for the girl, do you? Anyway. Make sure the innocent girl is protected. Take her back to her parents and pay compensation money. I am sorry for your children who got used to her and will now have to say goodbye.

Send d girl back to her parents biko. Imagine d height of wickedness. How much for d Christmas cloth kwanu?

@OP, why are you guys using your wife's relative as a househelp sef? Not good o.

TBH, if you would get a domestic help, it is much better to get an "outsider" so you are under no other obligations asides what's on the contract and no sentiments will show up in your dealings with her.

About the issue, you should probably ask your wife what exactly is the issue cos it doesn't look like this has been a regular occurrence. I'm not in support of her attitude also but the, there might be more than you are seeing...especially since she's her relative.

STENON:
The heart of human is purely more wicked than the devil ...

You can purchase xmas clothes for the girl as xmas gift. Just be monitoring her keenly as your madam is likely to frustrate your househelp.

Buying her Xmas clothes without madam knowing will worsen the issue, she is already suspecting the man, the best thing to do is to take the child back to her parents immediately she is done with her secondary education.

Efewestern:


Buying her Xmas clothes without madam knowing will worsen the issue, she is already suspecting the man, the best thing to do is to take the child back to her parents immediately she is done with her secondary education.

He should go and buy fine clothes for the girl, and present them to her. If his wife complains, he should just show her the nearest river to jump in. The feelings of selfish people should never be respected.

I can’t understand living with someone and treating them like an outsider. You did well by including the girl in your Christmas family plans. Your wife could learn a thing or two from you.

But both of you need to employ an adult. I don’t feel confident that children can stand up for themselves when in another person’s house. I’m usually scared for them. Human beings are not nice. I don’t know why parents feel okay sending their children to go live outside their homes.

Thank you for your inputs , I have no bad intentions towards that small girl , she is like my daughter I want her to be treated the same as every child in my house. I only gave my wife 2k to spend on the girl , a OK jeans and shirt and what’s 2k really ? , she bought 4 dresses for only our daughter , one for Christmas , new year , first Sunday of the year and for her 9th birthday coming on January 20th , and a pair of shoes , honestly she doesn’t need all those clothes , her wardrobes is full with beautiful dresses that she can rewear instead she should have buy something for the help and save the rest of the money. On Xmas all the children in my house will be looking good with their brand new clothes except her , do you expect me to clap for her ? I will not be happy seeing her looking like a trash . Someone who sacrifice her childhood for my children , she does takes good care of them 24 /7 i, I have hidden cameras in my house, I check it every single night to see if she does maltreat them behind our back , what I saw amaze me, she always treat them nice with so much patience. If my children have so much love for her and why can’t I and my wife treat her so well? Well for those that suggested to return her back to her parents , well I will speak with my mother in law because she brought the girl for us , so it will be better to hear her opinions. Thanks once again

cococandy:
I can’t understand living with someone and treating them like an outsider. You did well by including the girl in your Christmas family plans. Your wife could learn a thing or two from you.

But both of you need to employ an adult. I don’t feel confident that children can stand up for themselves when one in another person’s house. I’m usually scared for them. Human beings are not nice. I don’t know why parents feel okay sending their children to go live outside their homes.

I know u will still find a way to live d woman and attack d man.u Neva dissapoint

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

Bro thats a fifteen year old. Who does that

Unique357:
Thank you for your inputs , I have no bad intentions towards that small girl , she is like my daughter I want her to be treated the same as every child in my house. I only gave my wife 2k to spend on the girl , a OK jeans and shirt and what’s 2k really ? , she bought 4 dresses for only our daughter , one for Christmas , new year , first Sunday of the year and for her 9th birthday coming on January 20th , and a pair of shoes , honestly she doesn’t need all those clothes , her wardrobes is full with beautiful dresses that she can rewear instead she should have buy something for the help and save the rest of the money. On Xmas all the children in my house will be looking good with their brand new clothes except her , do you expect me to clap for her ? I will not be happy seeing her looking like a trash . Someone who sacrifice her childhood for my children , she does takes good care of them 24 /7 i, I have hidden cameras in my house, I check it every single night to see if she does maltreat them behind our back , what I saw amaze me, she always treat them nice with so much patience. If my children have so much love for her and why can’t I and my wife treat her so well? Well for those that suggested to return her back to her parents , well I will speak with my mother in law because she brought the girl for us , so it will be better to hear her opinions. Thanks once again

Speaking with your wife would make more sense than speaking with your MIL

Am sure your wife is igbo They sabi maltreat other people children

jakandeola:
I know u will still find a way to live d woman and attack d man.u Neva dissapoint

How did she attack the man? Read what she wrote again.

Unique357:
Thank you for your inputs , I have no bad intentions towards that small girl , she is like my daughter I want her to be treated the same as every child in my house. I only gave my wife 2k to spend on the girl , a OK jeans and shirt and what’s 2k really ? , she bought 4 dresses for only our daughter , one for Christmas , new year , first Sunday of the year and for her 9th birthday coming on January 20th , and a pair of shoes , honestly she doesn’t need all those clothes , her wardrobes is full with beautiful dresses that she can rewear instead she should have buy something for the help and save the rest of the money. On Xmas all the children in my house will be looking good with their brand new clothes except her , do you expect me to clap for her ? I will not be happy seeing her looking like a trash . Someone who sacrifice her childhood for my children , she does takes good care of them 24 /7 i, I have hidden cameras in my house, I check it every single night to see if she does maltreat them behind our back , what I saw amaze me, she always treat them nice with so much patience. If my children have so much love for her and why can’t I and my wife treat her so well? Well for those that suggested to return her back to her parents , well I will speak with my mother in law because she brought the girl for us , so it will be better to hear her opinions. Thanks once again

My brother your wife is wicked, if she can do this to her relative, imagine yours. You Don enter. Her real character is what she is exhibiting around that girl. Most women from my side are very wicked with househelp, it's always better to look for an adult. Kindly send that girl home, forget about reporting to your mom Inlaw, snake no dey born short thing. Send that girl because the story will soon change.

jakandeola:
I know u will still find a way to live d woman and attack d man.u Neva dissapoint

Go back to your post and read it slowly, then come back and edit your comment.

This is a stupid comment. A 15 year old girl and not that they are going to the same school. Did he tell her the clothes to buy for her? Even if she wants to get one or two for the girl wouldn't it be human enough....she is a wicked woman. I'm disappointed that you could write this.

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

You have a good heart bro. You can send her back and you can help her in your little way. God bless you.

Unique357:
In brief , I am a male married with 2 children , my daughter is 8 and son is 5, I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us. On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs ,hers and children clothing including our house help. Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself , our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we fed and send her to school , the rest is her parents duties. The girl in question is my wife relative from the same village , this girl is so nice to our children she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15 , I have never had any problem with her. I was mad at her that I told her , if she cannot treat another woman child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother , yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refuse greeting me back. Please house let me know if I overreacted

Teespice:


Go back to your post and read it slowly, then come back and edit your comment.

Prognose:


How did she attack the man? Read what she wrote again.

You guys know sense is far from some people.

Happy holidays to yous

Oga forget the nonsense cry, you have a very wicked and heartless wife. Na those kind women their house help dey beat the hell out of their children in their absent. She don't even have respect for you as the man of the house. At least she should have obeyed you as a husband. Some wickedness have severe consequences and no one knows tomorrow.You need to collect the Cash and go and get the girl nice stuffs for Christmas.if your wife is not happy about it then settle the house help and let her go. You are a good husband and God will continue to open more doors for you.

Women are just naturally evil

You did not over-react. You did the right thing. One shouldn't close his/her eyes to the wrongs that spouses does. Because the outcome will affect all.

Thank God you are even sending the girl to school God bless you sir ur wife like some other women is heartless but u can seat her down and correct her no be fight

I cannot respect you if you dont respect the waiter"..Mohammed Ali..

Your wife is not a good woman and you should consider divorcing her sef..For looking down on a housemaid she isnt worth it..I dislike people who behave like that to people on the lower ladder

unique357 I hope you see this..

Graxie:
Why are you engaging a minor as househelp? Why. Both you and your wife, you are horrible.

Horrible , for a house that knows how to take care of children and home. Your mind is dirty.