which is to seek for a lady and marry , one who will agree to my terms and has the heart to be an independent wife , maybe having me around her once in 8-10 days stay on every 3 months interval visit for the next 4 yrs , I know my self so , needless to engage in self deceit .

With a new-born infant?
Why don't you tell us exactly how you plan to kill her and bury her in your suck-away, declare her missing so you can be left alone with your infant lover?
May the gods of your ancestors strike you with both impotence and sterility.
For you are not a normal human being.
We see you kinds every day in the crime section with fathers who have been violating their pre-teenage daughters.
I pray you never have children.
Just my wish.
No offence.

@Blazay , I would rather channel my synergy to meaningful businesses rather than to engage u in verbal war . Y can't u be reasonable 4 once ? Need I tell u that if I'd wanted a child 4 rituals that here wouldn't have be my point of call .

Cultured:

@specialist900 , seriously u need to upgrade your IQ , your sense of reasoning is below the standard of people I need advice from.

Duh, if gibberish thought like your is considered as one with a greater IQ then i'd gladly remain in my comfort zone.

The greatest problem one would have is having a problem and not knowing he has a problem. In cases like this, THERE IS NO REMEDY.

Stick to your option B.
BTW why do you want a child so badly? Why can't you wait till your have the time which is in 4 years? Why the rush?

Blazay:

Yes.
But we have to report you to the police wherever you live in advance incase any child turns up missing or any pregnant woman is found ripped open, with a stolen child.

true talk o, i have to begin the sensitisation of people in my locality about this, afterall the festive season is around the corner and things like this are bound to happen.
No offence.

@Specialist900 , ur signature says it all , I quote " I speak my mind but not on all occasions" , now I need no one to tell me that you are in slumber ,therefore at the moment u are not mentally balanced to speak ur mind . Anyways, as soon as you take ur  medicine and regain ur mental order, then you speak u mind , hope it will not take eternity , I will be waiting .

Cultured:

@Blazay , I would rather channel my synergy to meaningful businesses rather than to engage u in verbal war . Y can't u be reasonable 4 once ? Need I tell u that if I'd wanted a child 4 rituals that here wouldn't have be my point of call .

It is not just that.
The vibes I get from you is just evil all over.
I regret ever responding to this thread.
You are nothing but badluck, and I don't want to catch it.
Seriously, anyone with common sense would avoid you.
You are plagued with bad karma.

Even with all your anonymity, you reek of evil.

Please, eat your useless thread.

Bye.

@hbabe , thanks for ur opinion . Note ; its not as if is a do-or-die need , but then I need it , the joy I will have having one will be immeasurable , I wish u will understand my point .

Nice man, but presently i have been speaking my mind and i'm saying NO to your unthinkable plot.

@Blazay , it is quite ironical you misconstrue my genuine desire , anyways , I owe u no explanations . However , may I add that if I had evil plans on my desire as put herein for advice , then may your wicked and evil wishes against me manifest , but if it is on the contrary , then I say may they be your portion .

@specialist900 , the above statement is also 4 u .

@op, from ur post, u r not  yet fully free wit time to commit urself, knowing that mariage demands dat u  always be there for ur wife and kids not only in monetary support but also physical, emotional and watever, gud.
But if i  may ask u, let asume u adopt this child u desire to hav now and place him under the care of the orphanage, or nanny, how then wud u provide the child needed physical, emotional support wen u r not livin wit and groomin this child the way u wil want him to grow? meanwhile u said u want his child to-be to have the best teenage upbringing /nursing from who? the orphanage or a nanny?

Secondly, if i may also ask, how is it dat a young man of 29 who hav just 3to4yrs to settle down and wud certainly hav children u will call urs be in a haste to hav one now from a different mother?

And thirdly, have u thought of any any possible issue u might be creating between  ur intented future wife, her children and the adopted child?

@Beync , foremost , thanks 4 your well structured opinion . Really the question u have asked me are the puzzles I found in my longing desire that warranted me to seek for advice b/4 I will act , I hope u grasp me . The reason for my desperation though not do-or-die one is because having one will give me unquantifiable happiness and sense of average feel of accomplishment  , thus the reason why I want it within my 30th birthday year .

beync

Help me ask the poster, person go just wake up with devilish thoughts come use am bug our lives for NL.

@specialist900 , I can see that u are yet to take ur medicine , please why not take it now so that u can regain ur mental balance and thereof make a useful contribution .

N'Landers , I am a man of 29 yrs of age , without sounding immodest ,I belong to the upper middle class ( Nigeria standard ) . Well the issue is that I am in need of a child I will call my own , but then , I am not yet ready for marriage commitment ( to be tied down by a lady or family affairs ) because I have got allot of things that will take me up-to 3/4 yrs to put in place before I will consider my self free to settle down ( please , don't mistake me here , I am not a player ). Now I want to know , what is the best means to have my way in this regard , putting into consideration that I will want the child-to-be to have the best of teenage upbringing/nursing , this I will be involved in by providing the necessary financial support . Please people , your advise is needed.

Thanks all

@ OP, the ladies will never reason with you with what you have written here== but to be honest i share your feelings and I know where you are coming from== setting a standard for one self is never a crime== we all want good things== and want to live good life==All these doesnt come without self discipline and hard work== Yes be focused achieve whatever you desired out life,  be it house, ride,  dough,  good health and happiness== then culture every other things shall be added to it.

I just dont get it. Why not WAIT for the 4 years when you are actually ready to start having kids? Why does the kid need to suffer because you are not ready? Why rush?

Akinagirl:

I just dont get it. Why not WAIT for the 4 years when you are actually ready to start having kids? Why does the kid need to suffer because you are not ready? Why rush?

EXACTAMUNDO

@Cultured
Having a child just to have a feel of accomplishment is totally wrong. You should also consider the child's needs, financial support isn't all that a child needs to have a good upbringing. H
aving a child involves a lot of sacrifice and I don't think you are ready to make such sacrifices now.
I would advise you to wait till you are ready, having/raising a child is a demanding venture; a child is not an acquisition to be purchased and dumped somewhere on the shelf but its another life that depends on BOTH parents for some basic needs.
Kindly have a rethink.

@K- Money £ , thanks allot bro , I appreciates ur candid advice .

@hbabe , once more , thanks allot , it gives one of my kind a great sense of fulfillment having advice from mature minds as you have displayed . Kudos .

Cultured:

@K- Money £ , thanks allot bro , I appreciates your candid advice .

Never mind bruv== Am some how faced with that same issue== But am hell bent== If i dont finish my project am not ready for any child and wiv issue, but it takes discipline and grace of God to achieve it,

@Akinagirl , I hear u dear , no be fight though. lol

@k-money £, u have a strong point bro , I wish u the best .

Seems kay and money don become one! @ freecocoa,seems like someone is impersonating here. I would need to see your benjamin to be sure its you

I am not fighting you I am just trying to understand your reasoning, because to me it just doesnt make very much sense. You need to want a child because you want to take care of that child and love that child. A child isnt some trophy that you take off the shelf to show off. They need much more care and attention than just money.

@op, yes i graps ur reason, i also no different people set reasonable goals and targets at which they feel accomplished when they meet such goals. but the issue of so desiring for a child before 30th birth day is wat i think no doubt keep one wonderin wat u mean to achiev by that.

then if u so desire ,  do u think that havin such accomplishment by  celebratin a child along wit 30th bithday is well worth it cosidering those questions i asked u? or do u hav a correlation between child and 30th birthday? why i still ask is becos i dont see a big  deal in that.

@Akinagirl, it seems u derive pleasure in hauling insult on another person , I fear u ooooo . So my post did not make much sense , well maybe u belong to the group of n'landers in the imbecilic union , else u would have know that my seeking advice from a public forum like this means I did not equate my self to God , I have no monopoly of wisdom . Please insult me not indirectly again .

iyatrustee:

Seems kay and money don become one! @ freecocoa,seems like someone is impersonating here. I would need to see your benjamin to be sure its you

Iyatrustee i still remain myself== wetin dey happen so you happy as them ban me naww

hmm Pikin don turn to birthday present. Nothing wey my eye no go see

@Beync, there is no correlation attached to my plan neither do I wish to have it as a trophy for my 30th birthday as some other people here has thought , rather I want to satisfy my inner passion that needs a child ( definitely I will make out time to care and love him/her, but the time will not be at maximum as I will want it be in the next 3/4 yrs when I will be fully ready to settle down , hope u will understand me better now ), having one will see my cumulative live happiness/sense of accomplishment rise to 85% degree VON circle. And hope u know 29 approaching to 30 yrs on earth is not common , thus escalation of this thought .

ok o, if that wil make u happy.

bwt, talk of the morality aspect of it, like u said u r from a gud christain famlity, is it justified in all ramifimcations? just bein a little curious, i mean, no mariage, no wife and there comes a child