Reffone:
Please this be no joke my parents have had a rough path for 17years now and a marriage of 27years things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and want to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child, my father is well to do so she wants to know her choices what she stands to gain or lose along the process please my lawyers in the house help out

Advice your mother to accept her rival already; unless she wants to end up alone and penniless; waiting for the meager amount that the court will rule for her; only until those minors are adults. And advice your father to be fair with both of them and not let any of the women in his life control him.

cococandy:
There’s a reason why it is so. (The marriage as a priority aspect). And @bold is a lie.

But again living wherever doesn’t change the validity of my point. Young girls can learn to say no to dependence in the name of being good wives who want to put their homes first to their own detriment . instead of being told that’s the way it is and there’s nothing they can do about it. They can be taught differently.

It’s almost as if we are too happy to point out the problem but reluctant to do anything about it.

Okay, let’s continue to deceive ourselves

I hope everything goes well in your family.

Encourage her to remain separated alone.

No need for divorce after 27 years.

She is trying to make the other woman the legitimate owner of her sweat.

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

OK,if that is what she wants ,its fine. She should speak with a lawyer first of all

You didnt tell us the core problem..

Is there still love?
Does your Dad still live up to his financial obligations?
Does he dislike your mom and still loves his children?
Does she want to jist seperate or she wants to be with someone else?
These are things to consider..
As for your mum she won’t gain much with a divorce cos Nigerian laws don’t favour women in divorce.
However the children might loose everything if she divorces.

Thread carefully please

Your mom should calm down before you guys lose everything.
The concern her isnt just about her but you and your siblings, your future in relation to your Dad's Will. The manipulative woman can manipulate everything to her favour o.

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

Call Barr. Maxwell
08104194694

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

after 27 years of marriage !

Self respect or loneliness, the choice is hers

Did she win a lottery?

daprofo:


Call Barr. Maxwell
08104194694

scum bag lawyer

cococandy:
Yes she helped him build it. If he had to stay home to raise their kids, he wouldn’t be able to achieve what he did. That’s a fact.

Her contributions are valid and equal to his. Unless he considers the money to be worth more than his children and family. She birthed and raised them for the family. That’s a significant contribution to the family.

We look down on that because it’s women who do it.
because we are raised to not respect women and their efforts.

Reason why I can never encourage a woman to listen to her husband and stay at home in the name of being submissive. Unless that’s her choice made out of her free will.

After you spend your youth working to raise and keep the home, it’s discarded as nothing and you have to be dependent and subservient. begging for what’s rightfully yours. Even enduring disrespect so that you won’t lose out.

So she should leave the children for who? If a woman gets pregnant she should be ready to nuture the child.

hmm
..this kind second wife them...

cococandy:
There’s a reason why it is so. (The marriage as a priority aspect). And @bold is a lie.

But again living wherever doesn’t change the validity of my point. Young girls can learn to say no to dependence in the name of being good wives who want to put their homes first to their own detriment . instead of being told that’s the way it is and there’s nothing they can do about it. They can be taught differently.

It’s almost as if we are too happy to point out the problem but reluctant to do anything about it.

The point he is making is young girls are not learning and will never learn in this part of the world.

They are only internet warriors and voltrons. Out there, they still and will always depend on men.

funmisticqueen:
No woman benefits from being the come up woman. No woman benefits from ', building' with a man. No woman benefits from self sacrifice where a man is concerned.

Why can't the woman build herself?

Plead:


Which young girls? you live in USA not Nigeria.


The young girls you’re talking about have only marriage on their mind during nysc and after serving the next thing is to rush into marriage ,they don’t care about having 50k in their account sef and will be very happy staying at home as housewives.


Forget all these internet talks ....in real life, most Nigerian women are still dependent on men, ‘only few are bread winners,well to do/ financially stable, or even have the mindset to make their own money and liberal’.

You know nothing about women

Reffone:
Please this no be joke. My parents have had a rough path for 17 years now and a marriage of 27 years.

Things seem not to work out no more and she is fed up and wants to leave cause my father is married to another woman who seems to manipulate him and has no single child. My father is well to do so she wants to know her choices, what she stands to gain or lose along the process.

Please my lawyers in the house help out.

at your age ur parents are looking for divorce ,this is what you need to do send the second wife with out child away ,then slap ur dad and mum to regain their sense.

Swargu:
You didnt tell us the core problem..

Is there still love?
Does your Dad still live up to his financial obligations?
Does he dislike your mom and still loves his children?
Does she want to jist seperate or she wants to be with someone else?
These are things to consider..
As for your mum she won’t gain much with a divorce cos Nigerian laws don’t favour women in divorce.
However the children might loose everything if she divorces.

Thread carefully please

Why must the divorce laws favour women? What stopped her from making her own money?

2special:
Hope they are legally married, let her discuss with a good lawyer before moving out.... God will see her through

Divorce is Legal. Let mama leave jare, bobo can't wait any longer for mama to leave papa

doggedfighter:

You know nothing about women

Do you women even know yourselves?

Hmm.

Where is she going after 17years? Is your dad asking her to leave the house? If no, she should remain in the marriage. It's a matter of you occupy your space and I occupy my space

Welcome to 9ja. Court go award your mum 20k for the 2 underage kids a month

Divorce is a long process and takes a great toil on both parties, especially the woman. No judge wants to be the reason why a party will break up and that's why they try to make it a long process and hope the parties settle their mess. That's why you would often hear in a judge final pronouncement like.... after irreconcilable differences....
My advice; divorce should only the option when the union is life threatening. Has prayers been exhausted? Family roundtable discussion? Perseverance?
My prayers are with you and your family. May peace and love reign in your home.

Caveat: However, I'm not in your or your mom's shoes, take the best decision for your sakes.

So in 27 years of marriage your dad was a husband for only 10 years, and an asshole for 17?

The kind of mentality most people have and the absurd things one reads on a forum like this most of the time are so repulsive.

I wonder how any sane person would say that a wife who conscientiously and loyally stayed at home and catered for the family (with or without offspring) doesn't have right to claim that she "helped build wealth in particular and the family in general" with her husband, just because he majorly contributed his own quota of the family's success monetarily/materially.

It's an abomination to approach marriage, a sacred union, as a commercial business.

OP

Your mother is entitled to at least half part of the family's assets, especially if she has been a submissive wife all this while. I don't want to hastily conclude that you've a small-minded/insane man as a father.

BigJoe19:
Do you women even know yourselves?

Maybe women you know and come across. Don't use them as a yardstick to measure every woman. Generalization makes no sense

I thought they said men never leave the woman who BUILT with them?

Now being a submissive housewife is insignificant.

You have to love our men

doggedfighter:

Maybe women you know and come across. Don't use them as a yardstick to measure every woman. Generalization makes no sense

It Is the same thing you all say, if I tell you to say your life plan, you won't be able to say anything.

cococandy:
Yes she helped him build it. If he had to stay home to raise their kids, he wouldn’t be able to achieve what he did. That’s a fact.

Her contributions are valid and equal to his. Unless he considers the money to be worth more than his children and family. She birthed and raised them for the family. That’s a significant contribution to the family.

We look down on that because it’s women who do it.
because we are raised to not respect women and their efforts.

Reason why I can never encourage a woman to listen to her husband and stay at home in the name of being submissive. Unless that’s her choice made out of her free will.

After you spend your youth working to raise and keep the home, it’s discarded as nothing and you have to be dependent and subservient. begging for what’s rightfully yours. Even enduring disrespect so that you won’t lose out.

And this hypocrite here is very submissive to her husband at home . you have a girl child, train her to be rude to her husband in the name of equality, we'd see what becomes of her.