My friend’s wife is about to buy herself a car after several complains of having to jump from car to car and the blabla inconveniencies. She now has some cash, an amount enough to buy her a gud car meanwhile my friend is in verge of making complete payment for his land, which will leave him with little to run for the year and bearing in mind family and advance educational study expenses while trusting god for a better paid job.
But his challenge now is should he ask his wife to complete the payment for the land from her purse, so that he can equally contribute to the buying of the car to allow him have a say in the running of the car, thus making their contributions for both the car and the land a ratio 50:50, after all the family needs a car for their family outings having been blessed with a baby boy.
The car will be used by his wife to her office on weekdays while the husband drives it on weekends for his studies and for family cares. The husband is not interested in driving the car to his office looking at the heck of traffic experience on the Island where he works but his wife will be driving against traffic and since she is a car freak he wants to satisfy her.
OR should he go ahead and make full payment for the land while his wife do the other, if he does the later would he have a say on the running of the car?

Please kindly contribute ur advise is needed.
Tanks and God bless

Communication, communication, communication.

They should both sit down and decide the most important between the land and the car.

Your friend needs to ignore his Male ego at the moment and his wife needs to be supportive.
Why wouldn't he have a say when she buys the car? Unless maybe he is chauvinistic and his wife does not have a say in other matters.

@poster
- shouldnt he have asked the wife for help in buying the land BEFORE starting on this project?!
- since wife rather use her money for a car, didnt she KNOW about the land?
- did the husband made it clear to wife that HE was buying the land? not HER? (we all know how many dont like to share such purchases)
- if the purchase of the land is for family, isnt the car just as much?!
- why does he expect a say in the running of the car? (will wife has a say in the running of the land?!)
- if having a say in the running of wife's car is THAT important to the guy then he should buy it for her.

i dont live with them and neither am i a participant in their marriage, so i dont know.

they should sit down and have a pow-wow.

so?

///

Instead of the man talking to his friends, he should sit down and talk to his wife.

He should say his points and give his wife opportunity to say hers. He shouldn't expect he is right or what he says will carry the day.

Marriage is always about compromise

The husbands idea is brilliant!

let her contribute towards the land, and they split the car costs 50:50

or he can go ahead and purchase the land whilst the wife buys a car with the full understanding its a family car for the benefit of all of them!
either way he will have a say on everything, since he is also running about for the benefit of the familly and not for himself

why cant he just buy the land?why must the wife contribute to buying the land?is she going to refuse him entry to the car?wont the car ease stress for all of them when they have to do family outin

Has madam explicitly told him that the car is off limits to him besides down the line he may get some money and buy the family a car and he should also look at it like the wife is buying the family a car not a car for herself only afterall he is equally buying the family the land not himself only.

Your friend should discuss the matter with his wife. However I expect that as husband & wife, whatever belongs to one belongs to the other. It is wrong to lay claim to ownership of any property because they are now one since they are married. Both of them can discuss the matter maturedly & come to an agreement. No one can take decisions for them.

as long as buying the car will not crack their marriage, she should please go ahead and buy her car!!!!!

Aaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhh

The man simply does not want her to buy the car because he will be embarrassed. A man like this already has the mentality of "my own" otherwise you will not even approach this subject the way you have.