I-man:

[/b].The woman we have spent 9 pages discussing(you must have missed it) cannot cook for her kids so there will be nothing for them to taste.

Awwww. Now this is where the union of marriage shall be tested. Now it becomes the man's duty to assist the wife in her short comings. Right
I-Man don't play with me. I need an honest answer, I am already fired up, don't make me have to throw another tantrum

Islander:

Awwww. Now this is where the union of marriage shall be tested. Now it becomes the man's duty to assist the wife in her short comings. Right
I-Man don't play with me. I need an honest answer, I am already fired up, don't make me have to throw another tantrum

What's there to assist when she not only can't cook but won't cook?  

I-man:

What's there to assist when she not only can't cook but won't cook?

She cannot cook, so he assists.

If she cannot cook, how do you expect her to

Islander:


She cannot cook, so he assists.

If she cannot cook, how do you expect her to

You cannot beat me at semantics 

What's there to assist when she not only can't cook but won't learn how to cook? is that better? 

I-man:

You cannot beat me at semantics Won't learn how to cook,is that better?

Was never my intentions o,

Simple solution to all this trifling brothers,
Learn to cook yourselves, so in the event that a sister cannot or blatantly refused to, then you won't have to join the cue here.

Islander:

Simple solution to all this trifling brothers,
Learn to cook yourselves, so in the event that a sister cannot or blatantly refused to, then you won't have to join the cue here.

You kind of ran into a dead end here.If you had been following the debate,you may have noticed that most of the men can fend for themselves.The question is the kids.How would the kids eat if dad is not home/or is sick and mum can't/won't cook.

REAL CHILDREN cook for themselves. 

I-man:

You kind of ran into a dead end here.If you had been following the debate,you may have noticed that most of the men can fend for themselves.The question is the kids.How would the kids eat if dad is not home/or is sick and mum can't/won't cook.

No son, I am right here. The kids can go to Grandma . or easy, pop some mac & cheese in the micro-wave. Or better call Mr. Wong. C'mon you know it's true, so don't get smart with me now

davidylan:

REAL CHILDREN cook for themselves. 

  No,I think a real man should never put himself in a position where he can't cook for the kids.He should never  travel,fall sick or die because we all know Madam won't/can't cook.She is too much of a modern woman to be bothered.  

Where is Fiyin007?

I'm sure he got enough answers before bolting,

I-man:

  No,I think a real man should never put himself in a position where he can't cook for the kids.He should never  travel,fall sick or die because we all know Madam won't/can't cook.She is too much of a modern woman to be bothered.   

Didn't I warn you about this your sarcastic approach? .

Being a modern woman has nothing to do with the topic.  There are modern women who are excellent cooks. So stop being a pain in our asses nah,  .( your pally Debo don lef u here to die alone )

I nah lef my man, I just tired fa all da independent woman crap up in here

woman can't cook and is saying it like its something she can be proud of and it isn't negative? she's a certified bombaclat

Islander:

Awwww. Now this is where the union of marriage shall be tested. Now it becomes the man's duty to assist the wife in her short comings. Right

I  missed this.Duty?   I thought the concept of duty in a marriage was unthinkable. The woman does not have a duty to cook or learn how to cook but the man has a duty to assist her?                

Islander:

Being a modern woman has nothing to do with the topic.  There are modern women who are excellent cooks. So stop being a pain in our asses nah,  .( your pally Debo don lef u here to die alone )

Debo got tired of navigating the bewildering illogical maze the ladies were constructing.

Modern women being excellent cooks . . . .what the hell is that about?   This whole debate is beginning to feel like an LSD ride    

Great topic with such diverse opinions and emotions.

@ Ladies in the house,

A woman cooks for her family - not her husband alone - because she loves to do so. I cannot but wonder why some women feel like they are slave when they prepare nice food for their families. How do you feel when you see your husband and kids look healthy and well fed courtesy of your cooking skills? It is a thing of joy for a woman to take care of her family and cooking for them is an integral part of this care we talk about. Come to think of it, none of you has mentioned the fact that cooking coud be a good instrument of control! C'mmn ladies! If your husby refuses you anything - and I mean anything at all, give him a correct dish and while he is at it   make your demand and see what happens . . .  


@ guys in the house,

I know the importance of a wife cooking in the house cannot be over-emphasized, but guys I don't believe man should lord it over the woman. The way some guys have been saying it on this forum gives the impression that the woman should slave away under their roofs to feed them. Love your wife and treat her right then she will bring it upon herself to make, and feed you with sumptuous home-made grub that your heart desires; even if she missed the cooking class while grwoing up she won't mind taking a crash course to make up for it in order  to satisfy your apetite, but you need to make her want to do it with love and affection.


@ those that support chef or fast food,

This is not acceptable for the long term.  The best of chef's food or ff meal cannot equal, not to think of surpassing, a food cooked by a loving wife with all the affection from her heart. Eating is not only about pushing the food down one's throat, what about the emotion and love attached to it. Eating in the house does not only bound the family together it also creates atmoshere of love and care. I can tell mine's emotion by the taste of her food, so there is communication in food. Is anyone feeling me at this point So, what gets communicated to you when you eat the concoction mixed and prepared by some lousy, uncaring, profit-seeking individual.

@ 50/50 palaver,

I don't subcribe to this at all    but I do give in 100% to husby supporting wifey and vice versa in all aspect of their relationship afterall God brought woman to man as helper. And while she is helping him, he is helping her as well; it is vice versa. I don't mind giving "mine"  breakfast in bed or even a week vac from kitchen and that is not to say I won't assist her at other times as I deem fit or when she requests that i do so. If I get home earlier than her, nothing stops me from fixing dinner before she comes in. Guys, if you have ever worked in the kitchen you will appreciate what your loves go through before getting that nice meal to the table.


So, what is the value of a woman who cannot cook?

A woman who cannot cook for whatever reason is simply incomplete and there is no other aspect of her that can make up for this inability to cook.  

Olufidu:

@ guys in the house,

I know the importance of a wife cooking in the house cannot be over-emphasized, but guys I don't believe man should lord it over the woman. The way some guys have been saying it on this forum gives the impression that the woman should slave away under their roofs to feed them. Love your wife and treat her right then she will bring it upon herself to make, and feed you with sumptuous home-made grub that your heart desires; even if she missed the cooking class while grwoing up she won't mind taking a crash course to make up for it in order to satisfy your apetite, but you need to make her want to do it with love and affection.

You must not have been following this topic at all. Nothing about this topic says anything about "lording it over the woman". It is based on one premise only - WHAT IS THE VALUE OF A WOMAN WHO CANT COOK?

No one is talking about making a woman a slave. Our mothers are excellent cooks yet they are not slaves in their respective homes. Cooking is not related to slavery if not the man should not cook too since he must not be made to slave away under his roof to feed his family.

REAL, independent, professional, strong black women do not cook!

If a woman can't cook and the man can,let him teach her!
what is the big deal in that?

all these talk of hire a chef blah blah blah,how many can afford that?
cooking and taking care of the family is no slavery and is not demeaning,our mothers did it cheerfully.

_{no wonder there are so many big women and strong black women eating goat meat in naija parties eyeing other peoples men.
with all these feminist views,which man wants to bring palaver into his household?}

babyosisi:

If a woman can't cook and the man can,let him teach her!
what is the big deal in that?

@osisi
Please read up the last 2 pages on this thread.Better still,read the link I put up,check posts 146,147,148

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-58825.128.html

chei how many pages

all the guys talking here left and right, will be the ones to cook , when the marry . whilst their wives do the eating .

afterall women were meant to be pampered and spoilt

muki,I'm sure you're just kidding.
I find joy when people,especially my hubby complement my cooking.

any woman that does not get offended or better yet does not seek to learn when her man prefers to eat Mcdonald than her Egusi soup needs to be ashamed of herself

mukina2:

chei how many pages

all the guys talking here left and right, will be the ones to cook , when the marry . whilst their wives do the eating .

afterall women were meant to be pampered and spoilt

You are a mess. But I love you no matter what Smally.

@Debo and I-Man, I am out. Will come back later, it's a two hour trek home and traffic is a killer,

@ Islander

Big baby will suffer

@ babyosisi
cooking is good na
but its not by force

It's a shame that African and black women generally have taken this independence thing to a ridiculous extent such that the black men are beginning to run into the arms of other women who would gladly do these things we term to be demeaning.

Cooking and keeping a clean house is not demeaning ,at least not to me.
The mistake some men make is that somehow they expect every woman to be domestically inclined forgetting that some grew up with housemaids and housekeepers that did all the chores at home including cooking so some never learnt to cook.
The man must give her the benefit of doubt and support her while she learns to cook.

But a woman that insists she does not have to learn to cook because she's now liberated from the slavery of cooking most likely is an unmarried one and I dare her to say those words to a prospective suitor and come back and and tell us the outcome.

cooking is not rocket science,with the right amount of maggi and crayfish,most foods are edible.

muki,I promise you when you find the right guy and thinking of settling down,you will learn to cook if you don't already know how. _{stay in school}

@mukina word!cooking 4 ur family is good but its really irritatin when these guys make it a duty,that what i cant stand.There is no way i will be a stay at home mum 4 any man never! on the other hand my husband should be able to cook 4 himself sometime cos i will be so pissed when i come back from work all worn out and he, my husband is back b4 me and waitin 4 me to go in and cook i will be so pissed.

Babyosisi i am already married and my husband does the cooking, gardening, Ironing, and cleaning, whilst i  relax watching a football match on tv

he loves me and dies it all for me  _{dont i wish}

thats their life ,most men will spend all their time with the tv  

@ Anabell nor mind this guys

Osisi, i am on your side on that. College degree, masters etc will never prevent me from entering the kitchen or keeping a neat home come what may am good at cooking and learning many oyinbo meals now to include in my culinary skills good thing too, my man can cook

well, if they both can't cook i guess Macdonald and BK are there  

me thinks every one is valuable o don't use your belle to measure the value of a person  

mukina2:

Babyosisi i am already married and my husband does the cooking, gardening, Ironing, and cleaning, whilst i  relax watching a football match on tv

he loves me and dies it all for me   _{don't i wish}

thats their life ,most men will spend all their time with the tv 

@ Anabell nor mind this guys

lol.
one question you should ask is this.
did your mother cook for the household and did it make her less of a woman?
I'm sure your answer would be yes to the first and no to the second.
The key is in choosing the right man,of course run away from the chauvanists.
A good loving man knows not to treat his wife like a slave

anabell:

@mukina word!cooking 4 your family is good but its really irritatin when these guys make it a duty,that what i can't stand.There is no way i will be a stay at home mum 4 any man never! on the other hand my husband should be able to cook 4 himself sometime because i will be so when i come back from work all worn out and he, my husband is back before me and waitin 4 me to go in and cook i will be so .

I promise you,this mindset will change when you meet mr right.
I once thought like this.

If a woman begins to find household chores burdensome,let her cut down her hours of work rather than nag and complain that the man did not cook the stew today.
That way everyone is happy.

yeah but all this chauvanists. are saying
treat her like a slave

omoge:

Osisi, i am on your side on that. College degree, masters etc will never prevent me from entering the kitchen or keeping a neat home come what may am good at cooking and learning many oyinbo meals now to include in my culinary skills good thing too, my man can cook

well, if they both can't cook i guess Macdonald and BK are there  

me thinks every one is valuable o don't use your belle to measure the value of a person  

my sister,I am not ashamed to say that I buy the foods from the store, cook and clean daily.
I even make meat pies and moi moi.
My man can cook too but I don't demand we share cooking 50/50 because I'm now in America.
He works a whole lot longer hours than I do and sometimes he's home before me but I don't expect him to run in and start making semo for me when I arrive.

If I called him to put rice to boil while I'm driving home or cut up the meat for me while I'm on the way,he will not hesitate.
Like I-man says,the man brings home the bacon,it's only fair that I know how to cook it.

_{bring in my own smaller bacon too}

mukina2:

yeah but all this chauvanists. are saying
treat her like a slave

no mind them

mukina2:

yeah but all this chauvanists. are saying
treat her like a slave

Nobody said so! Use reading glasses if you need them.