Truely it was a wonderful experience for me.what really amazed me most was the way my mother inlaw offered me and my people a white clay stuff called 'NZU' then i as them why giving us these thing first they told us it is a sign of peace.hahahaha very interesting

the bothers def fancy me while his sister kept licking my ass, i took it as they dont have sexy elewa in their house haha

guy am really waitnig for that day first before going i go don drink like 8 can star so as to be very fit

Mine is that i n my hubby is frm d same town n village.The first time my mother in law did not like me n she did not even come when my bride price was paid.But she like me now.

My inlaws are,

afrobaby:

Though not married, am engaged. Meeting my inlaw for the first time, unfortunately, my father in-law is late, so I only met the mum, wasn't really bad. I felt relaxed because my fiance has already told me that he has d final decision on whom to marry, especially since he is the first child and the breadwinner of the family. Though meeting her at first, she was a bit cold, I even had to ask my fiance if she likes me, but later she opened up, and told me she just wanted to be sure am for real and good for her son. The first time I noticed she actually opened up was the day she saw me washing my fiance's clothes, that was before I bought a washing machine becos e no easy to dey wash men cloth especially jeans.

Lol so if she saw you using washing machine, she would still not like you?

nawa for all these crazy mothers

pounded yam!!!

uhmmm the first time was hectic i have to answer alot of question more than logic questions

whiteroses:

the bothers def fancy me while his sister kept licking my backside, i took it as they dont have sexy elewa in their house haha

Bad daughter-in-law

Though not married, am engaged. Meeting my inlaw for the first time, unfortunately, my father in-law is late, so I only met the mum, wasn't really bad. I felt relaxed because my fiance has already told me that he has d final decision on whom to marry, especially since he is the first child and the breadwinner of the family. Though meeting her at first, she was a bit cold, I even had to ask my fiance if she likes me, but later she opened up, and told me she just wanted to be sure am for real and good for her son. The first time I noticed she actually opened up was the day she saw me washing my fiance's clothes, that was before I bought a washing machine becos e no easy to dey wash men cloth especially jeans.
The main thing is, understand your fiance or fiancee, know what he/she thinks about u, if he/she has decided it's you he/she wants, just be calm and be your natural self, u will be accepted with both arms.
And did I remember to tell you am the apple of my mother-in-law eye, lol, she could not even hide the joy on the day of our introduction , that even my siblings were telling me that my mother-in-law likes me so much, lol
God help us, I pray that the love we have now will not become bitter when we finally get married o, AMIN JESU

Nice episode, am waiting for more nairalanders to comment becos i avnt met my fiance's parents yet and she is d last child of four females so i am really thinking and imaigining what 's in stock for me. .But i am very hopeful though esp as a guy when the father starts to ask questions like ''what's ur plans for the future?'' , etc.

Nice topic!
My in law ehn! Chai na ACCA exam o at first!
My wife was last born . She's got five brothers(chronic players)! so, naturally it was a very difficult session except for the first born.
The father didn't like me a bit! Even though, I am good looking and I have got good job. The father said "I AM A PLAYER" and that I am going to play their baby of the house (my wife) the mother was cautious too so, I had to step up my parole in order to make them like me. I was calm and myself and stopped laughing with them and I was always at my best whenever I was going there.

That first day was hell and the father didn't even answer my greetings! I was not even offered ordinary water.

Anyway, the rest na history and I am so happy to have married their daughter. We are so cool. The father, mother, brothers and her only elder sister. Infact, one of the brothers just left my office now!

I am so part of the family now and all thanks to God.

i met both my inlaws for the first time during our introduction. They were quite welcoming maybe because i came bearing gifts. But her uncles, their long throat was there for all to see. People wey never drink kai kai begin dey ask for Aromatic schnapps.

I met my Parents in law during our introduction in December. While the father is a socialite who likes me alot the mother does not and even told my fiancee that she has her reservations about me. I was invited to their house on new year day (I refused to go)and jokingly told my fiance 'I do not want to constitute a nuisance to my Parents inlaw" I was baffled when my fiancee relayed this to them when they inquired about my absence on new year day.
My mother inllaw accuses me of not calling her regularly which I do not think is necessary and her worry is that if we get married, I would have detached her completely from her family. She also feels am controlling my fiancee. Her dad and I have a wonderful relationship.

i'l tel u soon

Though am just engaged for now mind was a question and answer session. It wosent really easy for me considering that am a single father owing to the double certificate I got during my service year. Her dad was inquisitive. He took me apart as if we were in a boxing ring while her mum only looked on.
As if it was not enough the church was another factor. I am a Catholic and they are not. It went on and on and on. Am still battling it out. The good thing is that my fiancée says is either me or no one else. She is their first daughter, u can imagine.
Her mum likes me but d dad, hm.

The woman is not going to bite you!!!
Just relax and be yourself! If your potential Mom-in-Law sees that you are nervous she'll probably wonder why and maybe
think you have something to hide. So be cool and enjoy the meeting.

I am here to learn

micklplus:

Nice topic!
My in law ehn! Chai na ACCA exam o at first!
My wife was last born . She's got five brothers(chronic players)! so, naturally it was a very difficult session except for the first born.
The father didn't like me a bit! Even though, I am good looking and I have got good job. The father said "I AM A PLAYER" and that I am going to play their baby of the house (my wife) the mother was cautious too so, I had to step up my parole in order to make them like me. I was calm and myself and stopped laughing with them and I was always at my best whenever I was going there.

That first day was hell and the father didn't even answer my greetings! I was not even offered ordinary water.

Anyway, the rest na history and I am so happy to have married their daughter. We are so cool. The father, mother, brothers and her only elder sister. Infact, one of the brothers just left my office now!

I am so part of the family now and all thanks to God.

ROTFLMAO. Okay that had me seriously rolling. Poor thing. Why did you not say your mouth was dry? LOL
I met mine for the first time after we were married with kids. They are all in Nigeria so we had to travel down there without my husband. I guess it was easier for me in a way because there no reason to impress anyone. I had already been talking to most of them on the phone for years.

The first time meeting his family for me was a bit akward. I was very anxious.

background: We are from 2 different countries (but im 100% african lol). We met through a common friend and we were both looking for a serious relationship leading to marriage. We had been together for about 2 months when he told me that he was taking me to meet his family. He had already "kind of" met mine. At the time I lived with my uncle and aunt and I had made a point to have whoever that would take me out on a date to come up, introduce themselves and say hi because I wanted to be taken seriously.

The day of: I have to point that I wasnt meeting his dad or mom (they are back home). He lives with is older brother who is married with kids. Anyways. That day I was very anxious --  an he told me we were going there after I had already gotten into the car, so I couldnt even "dress for the occasion". Thankfully I usually dress decently so that wasnt an issue. Of course as soon as he told me we were going
i started panicking a little bit, looking a myself in the mirror, making sure I didnt have too much eyeshadow or lipgloss, refixing my hair and all that. I had a knot in my stomach. We got there and introduced me to the grandma (the wife's aunt) in his language, and I smiled nervously (a bit stupidly too I think lol). She seemed nice but I know she was trying to be polite. I was given a seat and I didnt move from that seat for the next 4 or 5 hours. In the meantime some visitors came, I had to smile (of course) and explanations were given (that I couldnt understand) about who I was and all that. The wife came down and greeted me then her husband (my fiance's brother) came down too. To be honest it was akward and I was very uncomfortable but tried not to show it. The brother asked me a few questions later, like about what I do for a living, my studies, where I was before (I had just moved to this particular region) and about my parents. The women were a bit cold and I left the house relieved that at least this was over.

Afterwards: Fast forward to 6 months later, I have been going there almost every single weekend since that day. I forced myself to get over my being uncomfortable: the second time I came over, I took advantage of nobody looking and I washed the dishes that were laying in the sink and then every time I would come I would do whatever I see needs done (laundry, dishes, help clean the house etc.). I never came there and just sat on the couch waiting for food to be ready, I automatically went in the kitchen and kept company to the wife during her cooking or cut her onions etc. you catch my drift. She slowly opened up to me, teaching me how to cook their traditional meals, telling me stories about the family or herself. I made sure I would call once a week (not more not to become annoying) and say hi. Now we are very close, she is like a big sister to me. She checks on me or I call her several times a week. We slowly started spending the weekend over there. I got very close to the kids as well and they always ask for me whenever they dont see me.

I guess because of my behavior they saw in me a good future wife for their brother (even though I'm from a different country) so when my fiance's grandpa came to visit from back home, I was introduced to him as well. He saw me helping and cleaning and then I would come and sit by him and although we couldnt communicate that much (language barrier) we also got very close (he even asked that we take pictures just him and me to go show the new wife to everybody back home (and needless to say being grandpa he influenced everybody's opinion of me telling them that I am the one he wants and whoever thinks differently thats their own issue).

They invited me to join them for a family gathering in a distant region for thanksgiving and I was introduced by grandpa himself and my in-laws themselves to the larger family there.Since then I have spent christmas, new year, birthdays, baby showers and we have gone out eating or to parties several times; they call if there is any occasion. I guess what I'm trying to say is show your best "face" and try to build a relationship with the family members you will meet first because they can "boost your reputation"  and cut your work in half when it comes to meeting and "proving yourself" to the rest of the family, and dont just do it to accelerate the process, but genuinely try to get close to them because you are preparing yourself to enter their family.
I have now build relationship with family members that are still back home. I regularly call and check on them (especially his dad and godfather and sisters) and recently there has been some questioning about when are we going to finally tie the knot because they have all been waiting and are ready (my dad is the one slowing things up, )

I hope this helps, you will be alright. Use common sense, dress appropriately, be natural, be yourself, be genuine and if your are psychologically/emotionally ready for marriage, that includes becoming part of a new family, it will be felt and smooth. They might take time to warm up but you just be nice and helpful and dont take it personal if they come off as a bit cold at first.

Good luck!

Am just so scared of meeting them, i dont think i am ready for their questions yet. I have not read enough.

For the men, the logic is when you vist your in-law for the first time, make sure your intended father In law sees you parking your Camry Voltron with 16" Chrome wheel at their gate, you can bet it would be all smiles and warm welcome. But if they see you (especially your mother In-law) trying to collect your change from the okada man that brought you to their house, forget it!!!! even if you are as gentle and responsible as Pope John Paul, you can't please them o!!!!! Reality!!!!! So if na to borrow go borrow!!! and wear fine suit or nice lace go!!!!lol.

Nice thread. D problem i'm envisaging wit my inlaw is d problem of religion. My girl's parents ar adent catholic dough she's not a serious catholic. I'm a pentecostal but i'm not really religious concious. D problem is wil d parents allow me 2 marry their daughter and take her 2 my church. People wit experience shud help out. Thanx

His dad was very sweet especially when I greeted him on my knees ( we r 4rm diff tribes so I'v bin receivin tutorials on hw tins r done ) & when he was leavin we got down on our knees & he prayed 4 us. Am yet 2 meet his mom cos she's outside d country bt am sure it will b a breeze cos we talk on a regular basis & she always sounds happy 2 chat with me ( calls me d daughter she never had) aint dat sweet? Am truly blessed & I pray d feelings 4ever stays d same

I look forward to meeting mine. Boy! 'm so prepared!

GboyegaD:

I met my fiancee's parents at her dad's birthday though we really didn't talk much.
I had gone to the ceremony with a colleague. After the church service, we went (myself, my colleague and herself) to go congratulate her dad. Trust him, he responded to our greetings and that was all. Funny enough, before then, she never came home with any guy so I guess that made the father suspicious. The good part was that she had already informed the mom that she was into a serious relationship and the mom encouraged her. So during the party, she brought the giant hand made card we did in our names and everyone was surprised. The good part was that it was the best avenue to meet her parents and siblings and since then, its been joy all the way.
Now I feel free to visit without restrictions as they treat me as a son already and the siblings treat me like one of them. You know recently, her dad teased me why I like speaking English when I come visiting because he believes that as a Yoruba boy, I should be confident speaking Yoruba all the time. But I swear, that thing na work oooooo .

Her meeting my mom too was wonderful. I believe the reason was because I am not the type that moves around with many girls and I already informed her and my siblings when I met her that I have met with the lady I want to marry. Everyone likes her because they believe we are compatible and people claim we look so much alike even my friends.

The advise I have is that, feel free and be yourself without fears or fervor knowing. Please try as much as you can as well to be simple and sincere.

Omg!! I LOVE UR STORY, MINEZ MUR LYK IT, I love her so much but we're still undergraduates, shez so beautiful virtuous nd intelligent, we attend d same Church, shez a Med stud, m an Archy stud, ha Parents r both young Profs. Of Dentistry, nd take ha seriously
Undoubtedly, my 1st meeting wt them, hmmm! I can't wait o, i'l be so shy nd nervus bt m sure they'll lyk me

well, I think I'll just go in suits & answer only questions asked, would play dumb till d end of d meeting!

Outstrip! For real, no be small thing oooooo. U were lucky to have met your in law after u have got kids for their son! The couldn't tackle you much!

Lysaa, are you sure you are ready to meet them You that u cant boil water!!! Lol

Guddy:

Nice thread. D problem i'm envisaging wit my inlaw is d problem of religion. My girl's parents ar adent catholic dough she's not a serious catholic. I'm a pentecostal but i'm not really religious concious. D problem is wil d parents allow me 2 marry their daughter and take her 2 my church. People wit experience shud help out. Thanx

I am in the same bot with you. I worship eith RCCG and they are catholics (her parents are knights) and they want the wedding in the catholic church. I had to see the priest and the first question he asked was that the wedding can only hold on two condition:
* a letter of dispensation from their bishop
*my children would attend catholic
I reluctantly accepted and have enrolled for the 12-week pre-marriage course in a catholic church.

fynewaka:

I am in the same bot with you. I worship eith RCCG and they are catholics (her parents are knights) and they want the wedding in the catholic church. I had to see the priest and the first question he asked was that the wedding can only hold on two condition:
* a letter of dispensation from their bishop
*my children would attend catholic
I reluctantly accepted and have enrolled for the 12-week pre-marriage course in a catholic church.

Been there, done that; no biggie. If you do not make it an issue, it wouldn't be. If your intention is tat after the wedding, your wife should attend the same church as you, make sure both of you discuss and agree on it now. That's all that matters. If you cant agre on this, then forget it. The pre-wedding formality is just a phase that would go really fast. Funny enough, I found the marriage course interesting (I did mine in N.America and sent the certificate to Nigeria since the wedding was in Nigeria) and I actually recommend it for everyone. People tend to go into marriage thinking they know it all (it's even displayed on this forum) but it's funny when one is asked basic questions, people become stammerers. The course also talked about financial planning. You should take it; gives you a different perspective on marriage you may not have thought about. All the best!

I met my father-in-law a week before the wedding, as that was when Baba showed up. Before then we'd been talking, and he was already calling me "my daughter." The face to face was uncomfortable, I was ready to crawl in the name of greeting like a yoruba girl (since I'm not) and Baba is a traditional chief! Never met mumsie, as she's late.

My husband's meeting with my parents was much easier; he'd previously met my mum on one of her trips, way before we even thought of dating, so they were cool on the spot.  Once the relationship got serious, he called my dad and my dad claimed the connection was poor, he couldn't hear him, he should call back, he was busy he didn't know him etc,(story!) today, they're tight at thieves!
My husband's very first meeting with my mum he asked her if I could make ogbono, I guess her answer made him decide to ask me out. After we'd been married a while she asked him--"can she make ogbono?"(of course the answer is yes).

Now me and Baba on the other hand--it is a prayer point  but he'll be fine, the boy's been mine several years, and we're very happy

Delta007:

Been there, done that; no biggie. If you do not make it an issue, it wouldn't be. If your intention is tat after the wedding, your wife should attend the same church as you, make sure both of you discuss and agree on it now. That's all that matters. If you cant agre on this, then forget it. The pre-wedding formality is just a phase that would go really fast. Funny enough, I found the marriage course interesting (I did mine in N.America and sent the certificate to Nigeria since the wedding was in Nigeria) and I actually recommend it for everyone. People tend to go into marriage thinking they know it all (it's even displayed on this forum) but it's funny when one is asked basic questions, people become stammerers. The course also talked about financial planning. You should take it; gives you a different perspective on marriage you may not have thought about. All the best!

The catholic marriage class is really interesting. At first when they told me it was for 12 weeks, I almost bolted out as I thought it was eternity. Today am on the eleventh week and I have no cause for regrets.
My resentment is that Catholics don't see we pentecostals as serious people at all.

The 1st time, they were coId but now thins are better.