i should not hold hands with my brother or cousin again? All to prove that i'm not gay?

na small pikin ? okay
na big boy, not okay

omoge:

isn't it a strange sight seeing two adult/young guys holding hands
even in before before when i don't know what gay is, i always laugh when i see young men holding hands. they should stop it if they still doing it in Nig

omoge,we must not let this land of fruits and nuts control us.
They are not a standard to the world.
They have twisted everything such that we have lost our innocent kind gestures in order not to be labelled.

In latino culture,men kiss their daughters on the lips but in America it is sexual molestation.
Our men don't walk down the street hand in hand with other men but it's not uncommon for newly reunited old friends to embrace and hold each others hands briefly as a sign of "I'm glad to see you,I value you and our friendship"
It doesn't mean they want to jump into bed.

I have attended family weddings where we all the guys crashed in one room and the ladies in another.

The girls maybe 4 or more shared one bed sleeping close to each other in their night gowns and no one had a lesbian experience at those times.

on a more serious note osisi has said it all. We are fast allowing the western world dictate the way we live our lives. i remember the good old days when my best friends and i would hug each other warmly especially if we just met up again after a long holiday. the handshakes, the occassional innocent physical gestures. I remember boys sleeping together on tiny bunk beds hugging the blankets to each other to keep warm on a cold night.
Today that innocence is gradually being stripped away by those who have chosen to live their lives the way even animals would be ashamed of.

well, the world is changing. since it is a gay thing, let's leave it to them to hold hands

there are some things that doesn't look too good in today's society. take those days our mothers could sleep with their baby on one same bed abi? was it good? looking back i think it was dangerous but we are alive. that does not mean it is/was a good practice.

This thread reminds me of the good old days when we went to the village for the christmas holiday, a whole bunch of us guys would go to the village stream to fish and swim, we never wore any swimming trunks and we would push and play around and not even bother we naked. Try that here, you can find yourself in Jail

yeah, i did that with the other little girls too when i visited the village. funny some guys will hide in the bush and spy
when we discovered it, we started going only at night with other night owls when the moon is shinning.

well, eye don open today and things don change, so let's go with the flow.

omoge:

well, the world is changing. since it is a gay thing, let's leave it to them to hold hands

there are some things that doesn't look too good in today's society. take those days our mothers could sleep with their baby on one same bed abi? was it good? looking back i think it was dangerous but we are alive. that does not mean it is/was a good practice.

Who says it is dangerous or is it because the oyinbos have decided to give it big grammer (SIDS)? In all my yrs in naija i never heard of a baby dying because he/she was sleeping on the same bed with their parents. How many naija couples can afford separate nurseries for a baby and a cot? My brothers and i shared the same bed with my parents till we were about 5 or thereabout and my mom did not roll over in her sleep and smother us to death. Today we have oyinbos who are still children themselves setting standards for us.

OgidiBoy:

This thread reminds me of the good old days when we went to the village for the christmas holiday, a whole bunch of us guys would go to the village stream to fish and swim, we never wore any swimming trunks and we would push and play around and not even bother we naked. Try that here, you can find yourself in Jail

my brother na so we see am o. gone are the days that boys ran out to play in the rain in all our naked glory! Today it is now categorised as a criminal offence - indecent exposure!

omoge:

well, eye don open today and things don change, so let's go with the flow.

our eyes were closed before? who opened our eyes?

Education am sure opened our eyes and made us more aware.

Now go sleep

omoge:

Education am sure opened our eyes and made us more aware.

Now go sleep

education opened our eyes to what? that holding hands with our male friends is now a sign of a mental disease that even animals will never attempt?

Um SIDs isnt caused by a baby sleeping with it's parents.

ThiefOfHearts:

Um SIDs isnt caused by a baby sleeping with it's parents.

1. um SIDS actually has no known "cause".
2. um item number 5 on the National Institute of Child Health and Human Development (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services) top ten safe list to reducing the risk of SIDS clearly states that babies should not sleep in a bed, couch or armchair with adults or other children.

um

Just saying doctors dont use "sids" as a reason for a child not to sleep with his parents. Infact I dont think I've heard one go against parents letting their babies sleep with them. unless you know of a selfish mammoth that would purposely sleep on his child

there have been actual cases of babies being smothered to death while sleeping in the same bed with parents. One of the major risks associated with SIDS is asphyxiation either with babies sleeping in the same bed with an adult or alone with pillows or other items of clothing that may block the flow air.

I doubt very much that American doctors do not inform parents of the dangers of letting babies sleep in the same bed with them. Even in Nigeria, doctors do warn parents of the dangers. Any reliable article or website on SIDS specifically mentions that as a risk for SIDS.

poor babies

yeah poor babies, i'm sure you simply miss their black amala-like butts!

and oh do not place your baby to sleep on their stomachs - - risk of SIDS too!

This is one of the signs of American cultural imperialism. Since it is considered to be gay holding hands in America then it should be considered same in everyother place and we all have to be taught proper behaviour.

dafman:

This is one of the signs of American cultural imperialism. Since it is considered to be gay holding hands in America then it should be considered same in everyother place and we all have to be taught proper behaviour.

This claim is inherently false. America does not impose its culture on the world, not every American considers males holding hands as gay.
Nigerians are not forced to make the same assumption, it is the inherent colonial mentality among Africans that every thing white is right that is at play here.

The guy that started this thread is an American, isn't he? He is obviously echoing the general mindset of his society. I'm not saying they are forcing anyone to do anything but indirectly with the ubiquitious nature of the American media their culture is taking a foothold in many countries around the world and they expect people in 'civilised' societies to behave like them.

Why would somebody visiting another country continents away be surprised at something as simple as two guys holding hands?

dafman:

The guy that started this thread is an American, isn't he?

how are we 100% sure?

dafman:

He is obviously echoing the general mindset of his society. I'm not saying they are forcing anyone to do anything but indirectly with the ubiquitious nature of the American media their culture is taking a foothold in many countries around the world

The American media has made inroads into European countries, the French, German, Poles have not decided to give up their culture in favour of American culture yet. Could our own problem be more a colonial mentality or a lack of self esteem in our own culture? I know of millions of Africans who think that Africa was nothing but a dark, paganistic continent until the white man came. Was that the result of the american media too?

dafman:

and they expect people in 'civilised' societies to behave like them.

False! I live and work with Americans too and the dont give 2 shakes of a ducks tail whether you behave like them or not. The average American cant even tell where Nigeria is on the map.

dafman:

Why would somebody visiting another country continents away be surprised at something as simple as two guys holding hands?

It is called culture shock. If you went to the US you would be surprised at something as simple as two couples kissing each other on the streets, its not because you want every American to behave like a Nigerian.

David, Hero is AA. He's the same one that made up that bogus lie that people called him "akata" when he was in Nigeria.

as for laying babies on their tummies, now that's one most people are aware of.

TOH, Long time no see. Where have you been hiding all this while?

This thread is very very very annoying *takes a deep breadth*

Hero would've asked explanation b4 branding unsuspecting gestures as gay. I didnt think jews were gay when i saw michael douglas kissing his dad on the lips. I didnt think arabs were gay when i saw them pecking themselves.

Yes i seen some naija guys holding themselves or dancing together especially outside the urban centres. Would i do so? Perhaps not, but i'v been infected by the american media doctrine of gay mannerism.

But seriously we gotto protect the simple folk from a dangerous gay consciousnes that would awaken such thoughts the more than supress it.

@topic

That's Kinda strange 'cause i've lived in naija before and i never saw any grown/matured guys holdin' hands. never! maybe little boys who are not up to 10 years of age but grown teenagers, that's a new one to me. Even girls in naija don't even hold hands much. so, guys holdin' hands is far from it. u sure they were holdin' hands or they just patted each others' shoulders? like u know when buddies are chattin'/gistin'. they laugh and pat each other' shoulder. Therefore, it's hard to believe that u actually saw that. guys can put their hands over one another's shoulder when takin' a pic or smthin' but that def. doesn't make them gay. Infact, Lemme break it down. Gays do not really exist in naija. So, even if u actually saw what u posted, it was just a friendly gesture. I never really knew d meanin' of d word "gay" until i came to d states. So, i think ur post is Kinda new to me.

Well chiogo ive actually seen some men in nig holding hands (some young dudes) but those instances are so rare and insignificant that its passd unnoticed. It was the same hero who said a nig girl called em akata (which i doubt 100%) and he used that singular instance to say nigs xpressed discrimination 2ward him.

To most nigs gay is unknown. I got 2 know about it in da american media so the poster only interpreted innocent gestures according to his warped cultural environment. Quite understandable.

While growing up in nig ive shared the same bed with a lot of guys without the least gay xperience so heck!

on a more serious note osisi has said it all. We are fast allowing the western world dictate the way we live our lives. i remember the good old days when my best friends and i would hug each other warmly especially if we just met up again after a long holiday. the handshakes, the occassional innocent physical gestures. I remember boys sleeping together on tiny bunk beds hugging the blankets to each other to keep warm on a cold night.
Today that innocence is gradually being stripped away by those who have chosen to live their lives the way even animals would be ashamed of.

davidylan finally making some sense. applause

@ wesleyana.

urgh pulease. what does a child know?

a child knows that it's fun to be a child

i'm sorry about your innocence being stripped away, a la your last line from your "make sense" post.

Homosexuality is a thing of the west,In nigeria we just have natural love for one another and zest for life,if not for the mad politicians.Brotherhood

@ Poster
You are so americanised that you dont even shake hands with a felow man? what is wrong with holding hands in the first place? Maybe some people dont because in the society where they are most men who hold hands are gay and they dont want people to see them in that light not because it is a bad thing to hold hands but society miss interprets it to be something else something to be ashamed of and embarssing.In a society where gays are rare people dont see men holoding or hugging each other as been gay they see friendship and oneness.If you dont like it its your problem and people who do it should not be made to feel bad bout it your culture is your culture and should be respected even as other peoples way of life should be respected and not treated as disgusting cos you dont do things their way.