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The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation - Family - Nairaland

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The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Nobody: 8:32am On Sep 09, 2021
One critical concept in human existence is parenting. As a matter or fact, parenting is one single factor that dictates a great deal of other phenomena in human society. Almost every human is a result of parenting. Thus, a good society or a bad one is very often a result of the principles of parenting that is being practiced.

Kids are the central focus when parenting is being discussed because they are the primary objective of all parenting process. This parenting is a responsibility of the parents. Thus comes the big question; what happens to kids whose parents have divorced or separated?

Sadly, a great number of marriages are breaking apart in recent times. This has left the duty of parenting in great distress and deficiency. It has often been stated that kids are the worst affected by broken homes. Even some statistics support this claim.

Kids face a lot of issues when their parents are no longer together. It is even worse in cases of infants and teenagers. One critical disservice that separation of any kind does to kids is to rid them of the needed model of marriage and family. The crucial role of the home has already been established and extolled by many, which makes it necessary for the right image of a family to be portrayed to kids. However, in a broken home this image will be lacking and kids may grow up with distorted ideas of what a home should be.

In many other instances, this conflict between parents often hinder them from getting emotionally involved in their children’s life as is supposed to be. They become distant and detached and may only attend to their kids superficially. That deep connection and emotional care which is very vital for the growth, development and all-round well being gets missing. This is a very critical deficiency as kids who lack this emotional support and care usually turn out to be wanting in one area of character or another.

The need for attention is inherent in all human beings and highly prominent in kids. However, when there is a separation in the home, the level of attention reduces greatly. In most cases, the children will have to grapple with the absence of one or both of the parents. When there is a separation, many parents usually cease to stay together, meaning the children will have to spend more time with one of the parents than the other. In worst cases, the children are even sent to third parties to carter for them. As such, the children lack the physical presence, comfort and attention from their parents.

At times, with the break in the union of parents, come a halt in provision of basic necessities of life to kids. In many broken homes, the parents make the big mistake of stepping out of their kids’ life and abandoning their physical roles. Some even neglect to provide education, food and other needs. Mostly, by becoming uninterested or failing to have an understanding between themselves, the kids are left to suffer and bear the brunt of the separation.

Another evil that separation does is destabilizing the life of kids. In many instances, the kids may have to relocated to new environments, enrol in new schools or even drop out, get new caregivers and so on. A number of drastic changes are effected into the ones calm and smooth life of kids. All these alterations distort the life of kids and at times may lead them develop negative tendencies and attitudes in response to these unfamiliar state of affairs.

Still in this, is the absence or total lack of necessary moral development and discipline which is usually deficient when parents are not together. In cases of separation, the kids are usually pampered in hope of reducing the pains they feel from the separation. This usually culminate to acute loss of discipline and necessary moral upbringing that kids should have. This in the long run may negatively affect the children.

On the whole, there are not many positive outcomes from broken homes for children. Whereas, many children left to suffer one form of lack or another. Infact, this sorry situation has been highlighted in many areas of life, like in music when the likes of the late Lucky Dube sang “born to suffer”. Truly, the plight of the children should always be considered before parents hastily decide to end things between themselves. This way, less damaged and defective children will be released into the society.

https://flipmemes.com/2021/08/25/the-plight-of-kids-in-the-midst-of-divorce-and-separation/

11 Likes 2 Shares

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Nobody: 8:33am On Sep 09, 2021
Really traumatic
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by chatinent: 8:34am On Sep 09, 2021
Mehn..I can relate.

6 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Romanoff(f): 8:37am On Sep 09, 2021
I cannot relate but then, that's not to say children of parents who stayed together didn't get some form of trauma as well.

Some abusers became abusers as a result of their environment.

They grew up with parents that abuse each other and think it's normal.

Then some kids from divorced or separated parents turn out well. Some even wish the abused parent left earlier.

31 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by MufasaLion: 8:39am On Sep 09, 2021
It's really a horrible experience for most kids especially when their parents are celebrities. Their classmates, most especially their friends are gonna tease them, or even bully them over it.

The psychological effect is very bad!

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Lovenorth: 1:11pm On Sep 09, 2021
Though traumatic, it's better to separate if you would be constantly abusing and insulting one another in the presence of your children

15 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by favourson(m): 1:11pm On Sep 09, 2021
Very sad[color=#770077][/color]
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by SEGLIZ: 1:11pm On Sep 09, 2021
always devastating.
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by mbahdi(m): 1:12pm On Sep 09, 2021
N
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by GboyegaD(m): 1:12pm On Sep 09, 2021
Divorce or separation doesn't imply all the many things stated up there. Many people grew up in homes yet,l, know nothing about parental love evident in some post we read on nairaland. It is a dicey situation however, sometimes, it is better than the children living in a home where the parents are toxic.

9 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Deicide: 1:12pm On Sep 09, 2021
Romanoff:
Some abusers became abusers as a result of their environment.
They grew up with parents that abuse each other and think it's normal.
Then some kids from divorced or separated parents turn out well. Some even wish the abused parent left earlier.
So if you see you dad beating your mum you are going to assume it's normal?

2 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by abobote: 1:12pm On Sep 09, 2021
It's what it is, what's gonna be is gonna be
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by RPirez: 1:13pm On Sep 09, 2021
My worry is how 9ja Gov't should jail all the Pastors. angry

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Terezu: 1:13pm On Sep 09, 2021
Okay
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Sonnobax15(m): 1:13pm On Sep 09, 2021
The consequences of divorce is normally suffered by the kids,as they'd be subjected to separation.......
Speaking from experience, that's one thing I won't wish on anyone......I can't really speak of which is at least preferable between a polygamous home and a broken home cus they both carry similar magnitude of damage on the kids .......

The side effect of it all is always massive......

2 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by omooba969(m): 1:14pm On Sep 09, 2021
Ok
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by ideatoprince18(m): 1:14pm On Sep 09, 2021
Hh
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Fiscus105(m): 1:14pm On Sep 09, 2021
Thats why you have to think critically before you choose partner, ail these outward preferences would soon tire you and remain personality to make the marriage carry on.

The money you think the guy has, would he use it to take care of his kids not to talk of you?

Meanwhile, how many couples even think of well beings of kids wen they are together let alone after separation.

2 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Xscape047: 1:15pm On Sep 09, 2021
E don b ....means e don b

Advice the kids to learn some skills n find work do...
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by obajoey(m): 1:15pm On Sep 09, 2021
Why divorce in the first place?

Someone saw the red flags from the beginning but chose to ignore.

May we not marry to become single again.

May we not marry to divorce.

I am not married.

I am praying

but I don't want to waste time and at the same time I want to marry right.

3 Likes

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by AmigoDeDon(m): 1:15pm On Sep 09, 2021
Waiting for answers
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by chukwuibuipob: 1:15pm On Sep 09, 2021
sad
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Quantity32: 1:16pm On Sep 09, 2021
Okay
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Taiwojon(m): 1:16pm On Sep 09, 2021
So terrible

But all the same. JESUS care for the children.

Jesus save.

All who have Jesus no matter the downfall by marriage they always stand out

Come to Jesus, JESUS SAVES
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Daradared2(f): 1:16pm On Sep 09, 2021
hmmmmm!
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by MidaserveNG: 1:17pm On Sep 09, 2021
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Leerys54: 1:17pm On Sep 09, 2021
It is well
Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by mariovito(m): 1:18pm On Sep 09, 2021
It's a messed up situation. A kid needs the balance from both parents to develop into a balanced adult. The animosity, chaos and lack of love that comes with separation and divorce always rubs off wrongly on the kids. They grow up with a warped mentality about life.
A kid needs a father figure to look up to, this instils discipline and order while the mother balances out with all the love care.

I had a roommate in school who was raised by a single mom. It always showed in his demeanor. Always felt entitled, easy to pick a quarrel and keep malice.

By any means necessary, marry someone you know you can. Stay with in the long run but most times we marry for the wrong reasons; big nyash, the guy has a fat wallet and then down the road shit hits the fan.

This has led to the rise in dysfunctional society because the family is the nucleus of the society. We now have many girls running "package" and many guys taking to crime partly because of this.

Many times I fancy the idea of having a baby mama but then I think about the deprivation that kid will experience and I jettison the thought.

I hope and plan to raise my kids in a family set up.
But then, many of these things are beyond us. We make plans but then fate is the ultimate decider.

It's a beautiful Thursday afternoon here in the capital city, so let me
**Spark my kpoli in a peaceful manner**

15 Likes 3 Shares

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by Justbehave(m): 1:18pm On Sep 09, 2021
Is better to separate or be divorced and live to see your children than for you to die and let your children be told lies about you.

1 Like 1 Share

Re: The Plight Of Kids In The Midst Of Divorce And Separation by VillageHead: 1:18pm On Sep 09, 2021
Hmm

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