mariahAngel:


Nwanne’m, a maghi’m ooo!

O kan sele ba yen.

I need to see your teacher o.


O'n se ise takun takun

(make I bend if you understand this one)

Acidosis:


I need to see your teacher o.


O'n se ise takun takun

(make I bend if you understand this one)

Ko da ooo!

The takun takun part got me.

mariahAngel:


Ko da ooo!

The takun takun part got me.

I know right

You're doing well by the way.

People really expect this couple to buy another piece of land and start another building ?
Na so e easy?
Maybe they've not even got a mortgage abroad yet and wanted to finish their property in Naija, so as to face getting one abroad squarely.
House wey dem don dey build for how many years, wey dem never even still complete?
It shows that money wasn't easy at all for them to raise.
So to advice them to go and start afresh, when things are probably like 5x more expensive now than when the husband first got the land and they started the buidling . Chai.
May we not lose all we have labored for
E dey pain o.

Acidosis:


I know right

You're doing well by the way.

E se.

ikennamadu1:
You be wicked woman ... Allah , you deserve no place in that family

walai..oloriburuku ni ee.. gbabeee

Danjikanbauchi:
Aunty a House her son build na you build am ? Whaaat now I believe witchcraft are in stages. I feel for your hubby seriously.

a won oloshii poo nii nairaland shaa

Oladeji245:

a won oloshii poo nii nairaland shaa

what ever you bring use your head carry am.

I just believe e get way wey your husband dey talk ham with them wey still allow them go on to move into the house without his own consent at least.. or probably you guys have built one or more houses before that where you do stay whenever you come around since you said you guys do visit home regularly.
But since the deed is already done esp after reading ur husbands other thread too, here is my piece.. just let go, trust me you don’t wanna start some war with ur F n M IL, let him handle it to the best of his manliness. God go bless una, una go build an even bigger house and indirectly you have helped him achieve a dream you both can be proud of n hopefully with time l, together u can work towards making the Favor go the other way too as compensation to u..
Shalom

eyinjuege:
People really expect this couple to buy another piece of land and start another building ?
Na so e easy?
Maybe they've not even got a mortgage abroad yet and wanted to finish their property in Naija, so as to face getting one abroad squarely.
House wey dem don dey build for how many years, wey dem never even still complete?
It shows that money wasn't easy at all for them to raise.
So to advice them to go and start afresh, when things are probably like 5x more expensive now than when the husband first got the land and they started the buidling . Chai.
May we not lose all we have labored for
E dey pain o.

But what do you suggest they should do??

Your husband also created a thread about the same issue today. I'd like to approach this from the standpoint of this is family-- not just family but your parents (forget they are parents-IN-LAW). Parents who went through a lot financially, psychologically & otherwise to raise you.. You should be willing to cut them some slack!!!
Yes you feel they should have just rented a house since you gave them the money, you feel they are taking over your sweat. But since they are parents , give them the leeway esp as you are not coming back to Nigeria. Your husband can build another house which has to be in both your names. Or he can choose to refund most of your contributions to this current one. Either way do not cast them in bad light before your husband at all!! Be d one to advise him to be cool, calm with them. Even if you don't get your share of the money back, you have your husband's solid respect and you are not homeless either. I believe you have nothing (of real worth) to lose by not rooting for them to leave.

Solatpumpkim:
My husband has an uncomplicated house before we got married. After we got married he moved to the UK and we continue building the house while his Dad goes there to supervise.
One day his parent said their landlord ask them to move out of their rented apartment and they will like to move to our house.
My husband told them they can’t as they house is still under construction and we are building it for our own personal use. He even went ahead to let them know that the money used to built the house is not just his but both his and his wife’s money, so they can not move there.
We gave them money to rent another apartment.
We kept asking when they will move, but they said they will and keep procrastinating the moving date.
We got a call from them today saying that they have moved to our house.
What do I do in this situation?

Since your husband already started the house before getting married to you, pls take it easy

Since you have been contributing to the building project since he got married to you and he has informed his parents that your money is there, they are already aware now, pls take it easy with them

The best option is for your husband to bring you over to UK

You did not marry in that family to drag property with them

Save your life

TheeDetective:
So you are referring to your MIL and FIL as being insensitive right?

ok lets see if your husband will be happy to hear that you his wife is referring to his parents as being insensitive.

I will be tranferring this your comment to his own thread for him to see how his wife is referring to his parents.

Oga no dey do emotional blackmail, why not ask yourself what you will do if you find yourself in such situation if your in-law take over your house built by you and your partner, I don't care what your answer will be as you are entitled to what works best for you... Na so my papa do, today now he is retired and his house in the village is been taken over by his brother's children renting it out at will while he is still alive, my mother will tell him then but he will always say otherwise, now to chase them na heavenly task, they rent out and he will later call tenants to pay subsequent rentage to him and not them... None of his children can even point to the house that this is our father's house, so in his absence sef, nothing wey we fit do.

TheeDetective:
I repeat; let's see what her husband has to say.

And what exactly do you intend to gain by this To cause quarrel between the couple Human beings sef.

cooooooks:
These aren't self respecting parents.

That means they basically STOLE the money you guys gave them to rent a house.

What does your husband want to do about this?

It may be difficult to remove them without you and hubby fully moving into the house.

In fact eh! The thing just amazes me. Why will they move in without approval. It is not proper at all. They are laying claims.

Solatpumpkim:
My husband has an uncomplicated house before we got married. After we got married he moved to the UK and we continue building the house while his Dad goes there to supervise.
One day his parent said their landlord ask them to move out of their rented apartment and they will like to move to our house.
My husband told them they can’t as they house is still under construction and we are building it for our own personal use. He even went ahead to let them know that the money used to built the house is not just his but both his and his wife’s money, so they can not move there.
We gave them money to rent another apartment.
We kept asking when they will move, but they said they will and keep procrastinating the moving date.
We got a call from them today saying that they have moved to our house.
What do I do in this situation?

As you are pushing your simp husband to do to his parents, so also will your children do to you.

A real man should never ever discuss his parents with his untrained wife

teemy:
@Solatpumpkim, a friend and I have been following your thread since morning and I feel it is time I talked on this. I have also made several assumptions that I believe to be true.

Depending on the exposure and mindset, parents especially African parents might not live to the expectations of enlightened folks and sometimes, society tells us to suck it up. I talk to my sons, I say please, sorry, and thanks when appropriate. Sometimes, we come to terms on some agreements which garners trust that both sides have to keep. Unfortunately, your hubby might not be accorded such regard as seen from the write-up of the two of you. Managing the current scenario lies in both your hands.

That house which I assume is in the village (based on you guys want it to be the place you will land in when you come around) is gone. I reiterate G.O.N.E. Cococandy hinted that with the visit of a few family members at intervals and a stay now and then, even the authority of who lodges will totally be in the hands of your FIL. That house is now a family house. Almost no one in that village will hear any story in the court of public opinion. The words of some people here on NL is enough to let you see the mind of our 'exposed' brethren talkless of the village where it is expected that children do things for their parents.

I can deduce hubby sending money to FIL for the house building will also include money for papa and mama (considering that even the money fo the next house rent was borne by him). In all honesty, having someone decide what they want to do with your property could be painful but any attempt to force them out will even turn your hubby against you especially it being a thing of shame to him if it becomes a rowdy public affair and in the protection of ego, common sense finds its way out. The only other option left to you will be to collect your invested funds but I will tell you straight up that doing that will be a huge mistake and I will explain that in a moment.

It will be the beginning of friction in your marriage as you will not want to combine funds with him on any future projects. That trust would be gone and despite you being in the right, he will hold it against you in a way and this could find its way in future dealings (coming from a divorcee). Trust me, you have many more years ahead of you guys than to let money at this infant stage of your marriage together split you. I know I have no moral right to tell you to leave it as it is obvious it is a huge cost you guys to even get the house to this stage (he has been building it before you got married, you both contributed to it and it is yet to be 100 completed.) I do plead with you, I implore you to not ask it of him. If he wishes it, let him be the one to offer it and even at that, not collecting it will be a deposit that you will always earn interest on.

The rest, I leave to you.

Wishing you well - Teemy

Just one question.
Would you give this same advise to the husband if he came here and said his wife’s parents moved into a house that he and she contributed financially for without telling her.
Would you also tell him to forget the money and not let friction enter their marriage?

Their house is also not in the village by the way, what from the both of them have written, it's in the city. They pay rent for her husband's parents.

CanadianNaija:


Just one question.
Would you give this same advise to the husband if he came here and said his wife’s parents moved into a house that he and she contributed financially for without telling her.
Would you also tell him to forget the money and not let friction enter their marriage?

Their house is also not in the village by the way, what from the both of them have written, it's in the city. They pay rent for her husband's parents.

I did drop something for the hubby on his thread. I just do not want to link to it here.

check http://nairaland.com/teemy/posts. The one just after the post one you quoted.

Acidosis:


And na one unfortunate woman go still marry this thing like this??

Eh God. Women dey try o. Some of you are better off marrying a calabash because who marry this one I quoted is gone gone gone

Keep quiet. My wife is enjoying her marriage as I am a very straight forward man. I won't side my mum or my wife , I will always do the right or tell the truth. I'm a pragmatic fellow who doesn't pander to emotions.