Afodot0022:
Good day my fellow nairalanders. Pls pardon my typo errors and will just make this brief as i can. I need your inputs in this scenerio that is giving me some sort of concern.

I have been married for close to five years now and have two kids to it. My marriage to my wife has been ups and down but have always tried my best to be a responsible husband and also father. I ensure I take care of my home financially to my capabilities.

My wife happens to be a good wife though with her own flaws as she is not perfect. She always has the notion that am cheating on her and have a side chick. But to be honest to you guys, i have never had sex with any other woman except my wife ever since i married her. Though at times the temptation might come to catch some flings out there but will later decline such thought and abort any action have made to do it on the long run.. At times my wife will read chats I do have with some random girls and have the notion that am cheating. I know i have been wrong in this but attimes a man will want to be a man but as i said earlier, have never had sex with those girls. Just random chats that all and it doesnt go further or lead anywhere.

So it happened that me and my wife had a very serious misunderstanding recently that resulted to verbal abuse and also almost physical violence from the two of us. The last time i intended to have sex with my wife, she denied me and this had been in my mind and got me so angry towards her. So it happend that she needed my help for something and did not help, she started shouting and nagging and this got me angry and i almost hit her but i didn't. During those heated moment she started saying things about my cheating and so on. She said if am not cheating that i should swear with bible but i refuse to swear that night. Upon the following day i decided to even swear with bible that i have never had sex with any woman ever sinced i married her. I know i was innocent and i truely swear that very day to make her change her mindset and perception about me.

After the swear, something happened that makes me confused till this very day, I ask my wife to also use the Bible to swear that she had not cheated or slept with any man ever since she got married to me. Could you imagine that despite all my efforts to make my wife to swear using the bible, she refused bluntly that she will never do such. I asked her why but she insisted she is not going to swear.

This got me concerned and was asking myself why is this woman refusing to do this if truely she is innocent and doesnt have any skeleton in her compound. Her excuse was that she cant use the world of God to swear but mind you she is the one that prompted me to do such at first. I even seized her phone that if she doesnt swear i wont return the phone to her but despite my threat, my wife didn't not.

This lasted for hours and I later gave up on the quest. Ever since then have not being myself and have been thinking alot. My wife doesnt look like someone that can cheat on me cos have not seen any traces as such but with this her action, its making me to have a rethink about her.

Pls house i dont know what step to take as i need your mature advice on way forward on this issues troubling me. Every input will be well appreciated especially from married and experienced people.

Afodot0022:


As i said, she made me do it and just to put a stop to her incessant accusations of cheating on her and changing her perception, i never knew it will resort to this as i regretted it.

Ginaz:
All I can tell you is that “I fear your wife die ”. Why would she make you swear with the Bible when she know she can’t do the same ?

Something isn’t right and clicking in.

I see a dangerous manipulator in your wife. Someone who can’t eat poison won’t tell another to eat it except they want to commit murder.

Limitbreaker01:
Even if she finally swears, and anything happens to her, who will bear the CONSEQUENCES??
remember ur married to her, u both are ONE,
Whatever comes out of the swearing will affect you and the kids directly or indirectly...cos u will gain nothing from it..
So just let the matter die down... Talk to her and put ur knees down n table the matter before ur MAKER!

BigYash:
Bitter soul,it seems I just described you and all the female in your family,in that very last part.. Ahahahaha. . Bitter soul,I didn't mention your mother's name in my comment,if you read it very well.. You only came to my mention,to show nairalanders ,who you,your female siblings and your mom are. And ofcourse the ill characters you all possess. Bitter soul ,get off my mention,and go work on changing your devilish and manipulative character. The very one you and your sisters inherited from your mom .Bitter soul ,get this into your damn head .. The wise already got the message, while the foolish like you ,will forever remain foolish..

Ginaz:
All I can tell you is that “I fear your wife die ”. Why would she make you swear with the Bible when she know she can’t do the same ?

Something isn’t right and clicking in.

I see a dangerous manipulator in your wife. Someone who can’t eat poison won’t tell another to eat it except they want to commit murder.

Bola146:
Swearing with the Bible is totally wrong, let your yes be yes and no be no, what would you do if you see her chatting with men Do unto others as you want others to do unto you if you did acted suspicious, she is not a fool to keep quiet, women are jealous in nature, she wants the best for her family, she is a human being too, you are the head of the family, you should know the best for your family. You trust your wife but you are still doubting or your conscience is questioning you I don't understand? Please settle it amicably and if you are at fault, you know how you settle your fights before, don't let third party come into your home. Some comments here might lead your marriage astray, don't let ego destroy you, confront her and sit her down to apologise and way forward

Dymaco:

Don't miss the question. Why did she force the husband to swear when she know that she can't do same? When she know that swearing with bible is wrong? Why?

Bola146:


Two wrong can never make a right, the woman will never kill her if he didn't swear with the Bible.

Dymaco:

You are still dodging the question. Why did she persist that the man should swear with the bible when she know she can't do same?

Bola146:


A child would want to steal, you are there to correct him/her it's very wrong! Will your friend tell you to steal and still follow him?! You will correct or orient him not to steal. Politicians will never allow their children to war front but will tell other innocent people to do

Pumpumking:


^^^story.
You again. Hello n how you do you you are fine. please do u have yansh & can I chop kiss twise??

Bola146:


Ask your sisters that

Bola146:


Ask your sisters that

Pumpumking:


u cant never find husbands wit this kinda atitude.....and then u complain u cant find man on nairaland!! (BIG SHAME)

Bola146:


A child would want to steal, you are there to correct him/her it's very wrong! Will your friend tell you to steal and still follow him?! You will correct or orient him not to steal. Politicians will never allow their children to war front but will tell other innocent people to do

Afodot0022:


As i said, she made me do it and just to put a stop to her incessant accusations of cheating on her and changing her perception, i never knew it will resort to this as i regretted it.

Afodot0022:


As i said, she made me do it and just to put a stop to her incessant accusations of cheating on her and changing her perception, i never knew it will resort to this as i regretted it.

Afodot0022:


I sweared based only on sexual activity with other ladies and not based on conversation i had with them. So i dont think i need to be scared about that cos in that area, i am justified.

wizdomnzube:
Aje u be big fool. If u be my brother and u drop this kind advice I go dis disbrother you

Afodot0022:


My fear is that even though she is not cheating presently, should i be concerned she had cheated in the past

StUriah:

I ask you, how is it possible for a trusted wife of a pastor to get pregnant for a strange man when she was still the Senior lady evangelist/Pastor in her husband Church? It happened in my area some years back. The woman, after delivery packed all her belongings and moved to the baby daddy's home where child christening eventually took place.

Afodot0022:


As i said, she made me do it and just to put a stop to her incessant accusations of cheating on her and changing her perception, i never knew it will resort to this as i regretted it.