@OP, three years is definitely an investment, but if i were u i will call this grl and ask her politely what she still wants w my man. i tried it, and it worked,

Notin justifies him calling his ex twice everyday and even taggin his pictures on her album in facebook. Truth is that, the only major threat to any relationship is the ex. What I advise you do is pretend like you are not interested in him, show signs of backing out, trust me if he is genuine he will put his acts together. People dont know/value what they have until its gone cos they think they will never loose it. Try this

Daaaaaamn right!
Exes make the best companions in marriage.
Forget all these juveniles on the www who get easily excited about stale poohsies and dee--eks!

I recently read an article on this and I have one question for you: How long did they date for?? Are/Were you guys having issues b4 he started calling her?? What I got from the article is that most times guys find it easier to talk to their exs about problems they are facing cause they kno each other pretty well (depends on how long they dated tho). Esp. if its a problem in his current relationship.

Take a look at the article 4 urself, hope it helps:

http://www.bellanaija.com/2011/06/03/the-x-factor/

HIGH_CHIEF, subscribing to ur post. Nice one. @Bhusayor, oya na, no longthin. na wia we go start from [email abi number]?

he's feeling his ex,
so very much recently. . . .

@MRbrownJAY
Did you read this part:

I once asked or should i say confronted  him and he told me she is still his good friend bla bla bla

Does this signify business investment or any need for comfort? The guy is obviously misplacing his priorities whether or not he is doing something bad. Calling an ex twice every other day is not mere friendship. Going ahead to tag pictures on FB with her name is another attention seeking action which should not be.
What is he looking for with his ex that he needs all of that? Since he can't give any concrete reason why such communication is going on he should can it jor!

MAYBE U DNT DO touch ur toe wen yall having sex, and the ex knws how to do this bettter

Bhusy Baby, I'm so sorry to hear this-- But the bitter truth is "O ti n fi ina sori orule sun" (If you don't understand Yoruba, that's your business.  ).

You're BF is talking to his ex frequently? That's some Red-flags stuff! What's is wrong with all you Ex's sef ehn? (Including me)-- That's why your name is EX--you're Done! Your Regime don finish! Like Richvkunt said: Know your ROLE!!!! 

Anyways, Baby geh, first of all, since you've asked him, and he keeps saying it's nothing, (you don't expect him to say it's something ) then it's time for the next step.

Find out what is it they're talking about. Me I don't how you'll do it o. But you sha have to find out. You'll probabaly have to do some CSI (bug their phone lines or something)--lol-- Yes, you have to do what you have to do. You can't be left in dark and played for a fool. Nope!

As all these are going on, you yourself you need to step up your game big time. If y'all have sex 3 times a day before, increase it to 5. If you only cook for him on weekends, start cooking during the week. And so on. By doing these you're 'gaining points,'    while that yeye ex is lossing. Her attempt to come back will end on the phone. And fortunately he can decide to change his mind.

BUT, If you eventually get to know what they're talking about (and it's not good news), and/ you also notice that your effort to 'impress' is futile, then I think you need to LEAVE!!!--- Sorry. In life, we win some we lose some. 

Safe!

Note: If the girl wasn't an Ex (i.e she's a random girl), I wouldn't be saying this. Exes are very tricky, you have to handle their cases with care.

he keeps calling and phoking his ex!

I for one do not think your ex is imagining cheating with his ex because you are so beautiful and sweet! What possibly will he say he is looking 4?

^^
sorry, i mean your bf.

@OP, ur mango is the rippest , mango have seen in hours lol

I go like to lick the mango o!

naw, it my own, not for u, i love yellow mangoes, but prefer the black ones this time

U already heard her tellin me 'lets go there' so, sorry man, try else cos 'the girl is mine'.

@bhusayo
like every sane man who have seen ur pics has commented, u r really pretty. first, something tells me he did not tell u the truth about how he broke up with his ex, its possible it happened the other way round, i would not advice you start talking to your ex more frequently, because anything can happen, then its going to be all your fault. concentrate on other things like, work, studies, hobbies, just take your mind off it, don't give him much attention anymore, i know its very risky, but its the only chance you have got now. if he truly understands you, he would realize he is taking his ex stuff too far and would fall back, but if he does not, girl as much as it hurts i would say lucky u, because if u guys had been married what would have happened?

And one very important advice i got for u and many others, except in marriage, do not hinge the future of your relationship with the number of years you have both been together, years are just numbers, they do not necessarily tell the shape of the heart.
wish u luck

Ranoscky:

U already heard her tellin me 'lets go there' so, sorry man, try else cos 'the girl is mine'.

u mean she is cheating on me

You don't need to confront your guy to solve this problem. If you do, you might become the new Ex. If you don't care about that, then take any step you deem fit. But if you cherish the relationship you have with him, follow my lead. Use your brain, that is why God gave it to you.  Don't let him feel you are weak and helpless. Don't complain too much, else he will see you as nagging.

Find out if the girl is interested in him as well. Nothing will work between them if his Ex is not as enthusiastic as he is. May be she has moved on since. How often do she call him. Are they living near enough to have a date? Do you know the current boy friend of the girl. Find those who know the girl other than you man. Use your friends. Pry into her private life and daily routine. You might not have the time. But you are greatly bordered by what is going on. If you want it to stop, you got to make it stop. When you gather all the info, you will see that it is a simple matter to handle.

I would have loved to give you step by step approach to dealing with this, but for lack of time. Drop me a line if you want further assistance.

MRbrownJAY:

^^^imagine if they´ve entered into some business deal together and he calls twice a day to check on his investment OR BETTER he calls her because her parent died, thus to comfort her because she is suicidal or may hurt herself?

unless she has any reason to believe foul play, she shouldnt automatically see wrong in his actions.
if she has such a problem with him communicating with his ex then she should simply TELL HIM. et voila!

Oga haba, try reading the OP's opening article to grasp the whole scenario.


@op

 Maybe you need to just slow down a bit, i mean make the whole relationship looks like a play, get unserious for a while, stop calling, when he does the calling, speak and get distracted by other things, let him see signs of un seriousness in you. If he actually ain't playing games with you, he'd get the signs and at best get to talk with you (serious talk), then you can speak your mind.

I ll advise you on the little experience I've had as a guy.
The fact that you have been dating for 3 whole years and he is now considering going back to her EX means there is nothing, absolutely nothing that you can do about it. Three years is no joke, he must have studied you very well within the three years and compared you two. But what amuses me is that he is still considering somebody he caught with another man; either he lied about the cause of the break up (maybe he is the one that broke the poor girl's heart and he is now considering a return) or maybe you are still worse that the EX overall.
You can try what someone said on this forum first, learn all the sex styles in this world and give him. Find out what he doesnt like about you and try and change, atleast for now, try and do the things he likes - please let it look original, he might be pissed off by eye service. One of my ex used it one me then when we were together, and it worked on me then.

I don't always believe that ex are dangerous to a relationship if the guy is focused and he knows what is doing(of course except he finds out that the current babe is not as good as the ex) For God's sake why would I consider my exs when I always have someone better than them. Anyway , that is my own opinion.

Like someone said on this forum, give him benefit of doubt by finding out what they are talking about (maybe you offended him and he just wants to get on your nerve!!!!!!), but please do that one very fast!!!!!!!! And please if you discover that your relationship is under threat. BE THE FIRST TO QUIT - ON THE GROUND OF UNFAITHFULNESS BY HIM. It will help you reduce the shock.
Don't bother about how you will feel if you lose him. Never be afraid of loosing him.It is part of the things that must happen to someone in life. This strengthens you and makes you wiser.

In case there is any other info that can make us advise you better, just let us know.

if he is using a sxmbian phone then try and exchange phone wit him a least a day and give it to sm1 who can download ULTIMATE VOICE RECORDER from sharemobile.ro,hide d software inside a folder he don't check always and give d phone back.after hours or days collect d phone and listen to all his conversation.gud luck

From experience, when ever i call me ex it means i need something from her.
Your boyfrnd is not different.

i hv post my advise.d only option is to use voice recorder.dat is wat i use on my gf.

Just read through the latest replies and i really appreciate them all,

Ranoscky and donlittle

I brought this to nl to read other people's views about it, so i'd be sure I'm not overdoing it

To answer the questions thrown, I know the girl (not personally though ), she graduated from my school ; a year senior cos I'm in my final year.

the girl reciprocates his calls too, but he does most of the calling, so i believe its a mutual thing,

To him I'm being insecure, just as Mrbrownjay said too, but I really am not that kind of person

He used to call her once in a while, later they exchanged bbPin, went for her sister's wedding and so on, and i never had a problem with all that not until he started tagging her in most of his pix on facebook! He has had 3 other exes after this girl and never for one tot she could be a threat. He still calls his immediate ex once in a while,

When he came to check on me in school, I went through his call log and as bb does, i saw the call history for one month and realised they ve been communicating well, I was really shocked!

I am not the perfect girlfriend and i dont even have the intention of trying to impress him, I'm still the same girl he s been dating for years,

He s still around though and I am sticking to playing the unserious role and see if it would change anything, plus i still need to find out what is happening or about to happen between them

My dear, I really feel you, but in this situation, there is very little you can do. Don’t listen to all those people telling you to sshag him more, or cook more, that he will come to love you more. Once a man's mind is made up about a woman, there is nothing a girl can do. For guys, its still a possibility you can change the mind of woman who has thrown you out, so long as you get the right breaks in life.

You are walking a tight rope. He could have left this Ex cos she banged another guy and he caught her. So, if he is seeming to go back to her now, it is only because he loved her, probably more than she loved him. But catching her with another was too much, he had to man up and leave her because that is what common sense dictated, not necessarily because he stopped loving her. After 5 years, the pain has gone and he is thinking about hooking up with her again, though everything seems to be tentative for now.

If he is tagging her in pictures, it also means he is living a life he is not averse to her knowing, meaning he has moved up economically, so maybe he also feels that he can afford her now- maybe the reason she went shagging another guy was money. If you, yourself, you are so afraid of him leaving, amaybe apart from loving him as well, he has money to throw around, so his love isn’t the only thing you will miss should you pack it up.

From what I can discern, the ex, being the LovePeddler she is also sucking up to him, but everything hasn’t gone full throttle cos maybe she is in another relationship as well and wanst to be sure before she quits and comes back to your guy, her ex, who is now richer. Either which way, you are on borrowed time. In such issues, your effort doesn’t matter. Many guys are still in love with their ex’s and should such an ex give a guy a green, he’d go running back to her, especially if she is steamy and hot. It don’t matter what the present girl does. Your only prayer should be that the ex is not interested, else, there is nothing you can do.

How are u sure he calls her 2 times everyday!!?? it means you practically leave with your boyfriend everyday except you are exaggerating. even if you confirm he does, see, I honestly dont think your boyfriend will accept her back or take her to the aisle. moreover , a relationship of three years should have ensure your trust and break every feeling of insecurity. That your boyfriend calls or even see her does not guarantee a preference for her especially when what broke them up was a case of infidelity.

What you should do is to talk with him quietly without shouting or quarreling. There must be something that you don't have that must be drawing him to her. Communicate very well since you do not want to loose him. definitely he doesnt prefer her!

TY4succex:

How are u sure he calls her 2 times everyday!!?? it means you practically leave with your boyfriend everyday except you are exaggerating. even if you confirm he does, see, I honestly dont think your boyfriend will accept her back or take her to the aisle. moreover , a relationship of three years should have ensure your trust and break every feeling of insecurity. That your boyfriend calls or even see her does not guarantee a preference for her especially when what broke them up was a case of infidelity.

What you should do is to talk with him quietly without shouting or quarreling. There must be something that you don't have that must be drawing him to her. Communicate very well since you do not want to loose him. definitely he doesnt prefer her!

You need to review previous posts for better understanding, tanx all the same

Above all, prepare yor mind for the worst o. I m sure u are already doing that. Pray about it too. Prayer works.

With you latest explanation, it shows that the love grew again over time between them. It might continue growing. Personally, I wont advise your to play unserious role. Who knows maybe that is what the guy has been waiting for to use as an excuse for leaving you. The girl is a graduate (probably working), you are not, maybe it is a reason for him for wanting to go back (he must be dumb to do that anyway).
Like I said, which is what I did during my time, pray very well about it. It doesnt matter whether you are a sinner are not, once you pray about it that God should give you the right man (for marriage ni o), He will definately answer you. I am very sure of that. Please and please, dont be afraid of losing him. It is better to have a broken relationship than to have a broken marriage.

Best of luck.

@ OP: Run! Run! Run!