Maryliola:
Hey guys

I’m making this post because I don’t want to be judged and I can’t turn my on people in my real life because they may not understand. Well I’ve been married for 2 plus years I’m 27 with a son. I’m going to get personal so embrace yourself.

Myself and my husband have a good relationship, almost too good because I literally see him like my brother. This is to the point where our romantic/lover side of our relationship is kinda dead. I see him naked, it’s like looking at my brother naked. I don’t feel turned on, or excited. We talk and gist like friends, but romantically things are flat. Our sex life is mediocre I guess. He doesn’t do oralll sexxx and he ejaculates very fast. I’m talking 10 seconds, and it’s every single time despite taking different preventative measures. I know that I’m extremely clean as I’m very observant of myself and he also tells me all the time. Yet orall sexxx is disgusting to him and “dehumanising”. There’s no passion when we kiss, its forced most times.


Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.

Help!

Mods, I need this on front page as I need help for people to see this.

toujurs:
Buy a vibrator, to stab that urge to death.

Alexaonfleek:
Na really wa for you

Iyaebe:
You'll have to like it if your wife wants it,she's clean and I read it's even cleaner than the mouth,it cleanses and purify itself except in cases of infection

Bigpapi:





Poison him fullstop

bizzibodi:

Look most vulvas are unsightly look at not to talk of mouthing it.
Tufiakwa!our forefathers never practice it.

juri:
Not wanting to mock you, but hoping others will learn a thin or two. Some important issues you raised are issues to have been addressed before marriage, such as MouthAction and whether a partner likes or detaste same.

Also, it is very important in a relationship that parties are sexually attracted to each other. Where this is absent in a relationship, there is no need going forward into a marital relationship with such a person. In a business or professional relationship, the romantic attraction will not be necessary and should be even Discouraged. It seems to me that the sexual attraction has not really been there from the start.

Giving you discription of sexual unatractivness, I also hope this person is not your blood relative like a brother etc that both of you may not yet even know. In our world today, this is very possible.

If you are sure the above is not true, backed with scientific evidence, then concerning your present situation, you need to stop the fantasizing, that is already infidelity on your part. There are natural ways your partner can be helped to last longer including the change of diets like stop taking suger, counting the number of trust/penetration as he pounds. For example, he does 10 shallow trust/penetrations with his cap/just the edge of the penis going inside only and then 1 full trust/penetration with the entire penis going in fully. Then 9 shallow trust followed by 2 full trust, then 8 shallow trust followed by 3 full trust, all in that revers order until you get to 10. You both need to discuss this and more options including exercises.

I believe a lot needs to be understood though. Like before you met him, what was your sexual past like. Bcs for example, someone who has slept with brick layer, several sexual drugs enhancement partners, in some cases even dogs or horses etc, should not expect her partner to match such a resume. I am just giving an instance here.

Iyaebe:
Don't mind mind him, is giving head not better and healthier than party wey he dy do? ignore him

olabrinks:
I’m going to be real with you sis, you cannot find the solution you want unless you cheat on your husband. Your husband is stuck in his ways, he’s not willing to compromise or sacrifice his beliefs for your satisfaction. Let me tell you the truth my sister, most men just want to cum and sleep. All this extra gra gra is work for them, and like you said they have other things to worry about. This is how most married women feel, men especially become laid back once they are having sex with the same woman over and over again. Married woman to married woman.

My real advice to you is to satisfy yourself with your hands or a toy when you are Hot. Focus on your child and your career. Accept that you can never have it all in marriage. Your partner must lack in one department, it may be sex, finances, compassion, good looks, hygiene etc.. there’s always something. The easy thing to do is to look for that missing thing in someone else. The smart thing to do is to focus on the positives and try to enjoy your marriage the best way you can. You said you are like friends….go on adventures with him, go out clubbing, go to parties.. you will begin to overlook this missing void you’re feeling. This is feeling is temporary, good luck to you.

Maryliola:
Hey guys

I’m making this post because I don’t want to be judged and I can’t turn my on people in my real life because they may not understand. Well I’ve been married for 2 plus years I’m 27 with a son. I’m going to get personal so embrace yourself.

Myself and my husband have a good relationship, almost too good because I literally see him like my brother. This is to the point where our romantic/lover side of our relationship is kinda dead. I see him naked, it’s like looking at my brother naked. I don’t feel turned on, or excited. We talk and gist like friends, but romantically things are flat. Our sex life is mediocre I guess. He doesn’t do oralll sexxx and he ejaculates very fast. I’m talking 10 seconds, and it’s every single time despite taking different preventative measures. I know that I’m extremely clean as I’m very observant of myself and he also tells me all the time. Yet orall sexxx is disgusting to him and “dehumanising”. There’s no passion when we kiss, its forced most times.


Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.

Help!

Mods, I need this on front page as I need help for people to see this.

ahnie:
Op, you're not alone on what you're experiencing,neither are you delusional.there are community of women like you in same shoes,but they're afraid to speak up.


Here's the sad news, there's nothing you can do about it.even if you express your concerns to your husband,you either live with it or stray out collect like 2 knacks.




Shalom.

juri:
Not wanting to mock you, but hoping others will learn a thin or two. Some important issues you raised are issues to have been addressed before marriage, such as MouthAction and whether a partner likes or detaste same.

Also, it is very important in a relationship that parties are sexually attracted to each other. Where this is absent in a relationship, there is no need going forward into a marital relationship with such a person. In a business or professional relationship, the romantic attraction will not be necessary and should be even Discouraged. It seems to me that the sexual attraction has not really been there from the start.

Giving you discription of sexual unatractivness, I also hope this person is not your blood relative like a brother etc that both of you may not yet even know. In our world today, this is very possible.

If you are sure the above is not true, backed with scientific evidence, then concerning your present situation, you need to stop the fantasizing, that is already infidelity on your part. There are natural ways your partner can be helped to last longer including the change of diets like stop taking suger, counting the number of trust/penetration as he pounds. For example, he does 10 shallow trust/penetrations with his cap/just the edge of the penis going inside only and then 1 full trust/penetration with the entire penis going in fully. Then 9 shallow trust followed by 2 full trust, then 8 shallow trust followed by 3 full trust, all in that revers order until you get to 10. You both need to discuss this and more options including exercises.

I believe a lot needs to be understood though. Like before you met him, what was your sexual past like. Bcs for example, someone who has slept with brick layer, several sexual drugs enhancement partners, in some cases even dogs or horses etc, should not expect her partner to match such a resume. I am just giving an instance here.

lkillbrokehoes:
Zzor aka wargidanairala just look at how you are all over this thread from page 1 to this page constituting nuisance, you better behave yourself and stay off my lane.

Iyaebe:
Too many married women are becoming sex starved hence the increase in adultery. Men really need to up their game and live a healthy lifestyle.

salvation77177:

Be careful of advice some inexperienced folks give you here. Don't go and do what will bring God's judgment upon you because of sex. Whoever is advising you to use intimacy gadgets to satisfy yourself in the absence of your husband not performing to your satisfaction is an enemy whom the devil is passing through to attck your life.
I want to remind you that God created sex between partners for procreation and not for anything else. I am thinking your past life before you got married may not be too clean hence this problem is playing out now. You cannot force a man into mouth action which I see as unclean and my wife too never assents to it in our marriage. Don't allow your ungodly sexual drive or urge to push you into committing an abomination before man and God. Accept your husband the way he is and pray for him to understand certain things rather than bringing him to nairaland here. The solution to your problem is not here but lies within you. Do not allow your sexual past affect your present and future negatively. Be careful not of you do and think for the sake of your children. They are men and women around us who choose to live a life of celibacy. This is telling us that marriage and sex is not ultimate but option. Please,love your husband ay Accord him a respect of an husband.

Icon79:
Truth be told, sex in marriage is boring. Short and simple. Hence, you’ll need to build your marriage on something more than sex. Eve was created to be a helpmate for Adam not solely to be a sex mate.

Bottom line, there’s more to life than sex. Unfortunately, Hollywood and the sex industry have made many people to think that sex is all there is to life. Sex is actually very overrated. Trust me, I know. I used to be a sex addict.


O pari

Maryliola:
Hey guys

I’m making this post because I don’t want to be judged and I can’t turn my on people in my real life because they may not understand. Well I’ve been married for 2 plus years I’m 27 with a son. I’m going to get personal so embrace yourself.

Myself and my husband have a good relationship, almost too good because I literally see him like my brother. This is to the point where our romantic/lover side of our relationship is kinda dead. I see him naked, it’s like looking at my brother naked. I don’t feel turned on, or excited. We talk and gist like friends, but romantically things are flat. Our sex life is mediocre I guess. He doesn’t do oralll sexxx and he ejaculates very fast. I’m talking 10 seconds, and it’s every single time despite taking different preventative measures. I know that I’m extremely clean as I’m very observant of myself and he also tells me all the time. Yet orall sexxx is disgusting to him and “dehumanising”. There’s no passion when we kiss, its forced most times.


Lately I’ve been finding myself fantasising about being touched by a man , almost every night . A man that will give me orall sexx a man that will turn me on and blow me away. I don’t want to be judged here, but this is genuinely how I’ve been feeling. I don’t want to put pressure on my husband as he has other things to worry about.
A man that will kiss me in all the right places and make me feel like a woman. Sometimes I believe I’m being delusional, or unrealistic. I’m trying to get rid of these thoughts, but I really don’t know how. I have never cheated on my husband and I don’t think I have the guts to do it. I really just want to know how married people cope when that spark is gone. When you begin to look at your spouse like a brother or sister, and romantically the vibes are not there.

Let me also say that I’ve addressed this to him many times, but he stands he’s not willing to compromise.

Help!

Mods, I need this on front page as I need help for people to see this.

biddostandard:
Why u dey everywhere like say na ur matter