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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? (67230 Views)
My Aunt In Nigeria Stopped Liking My Photos / I'm Crushing On This Woman(photo) / Nairalander Help Me!!! I'm Crushing On This Girl [pix] (2) (3) (4)
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Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by Shagbatshagba(m): 8:13am On Apr 11, 2022 |
Roycemadeit: i dnt get u roycemadeit......so if i father my child are u saying i should nt have d mindset of me owning my child? |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by Roycemadeit(m): 8:47am On Apr 11, 2022 |
Shagbatshagba: A human is not an object, like a phone, you know. They are capable of making their own decision but when you have the mindset that you own them, you will do a lot of things that would limit their experience of life and interest. Asides from this, it should not matter if one is the father or not, the most important thing is that that child is human, the mentality that governs the idea of ownership is the root cause of separatism and this is why the world is toxic. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by cjscon(m): 9:09am On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen:[b]simple open up to your husband and later the drama unfold,he will build a walk of fortress around with jealous and monitoring eyes am sure ur Rev.will get the message and flee...you self try and go for alter call and give ur life to Christ again[/b] 2 Likes |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 9:44am On Apr 11, 2022 |
EkyyyKelson:I avoid this man, but he finds way of coming to me...everytime... Coming to me reminds me of him which makes the feeling triggers. Normally after church closes, I have to wait for my husband around the church cos he has to reach out to other people in the church, so while waiting this man finds a way of coming around, we exchange gestures , talk if necessary and then depart.... I avoid him, he comes to me, what I hate most is the way he greets only me among people , I feel awkward and I'm feeling it might just stir up jealousy in others... These are my thoughts and I feel I might be wrong about it......... If only he can avoid me, I'll be very fine, someone mentions that I snub him, how can I possibly can without sending negative messages to other people around... Someone who is supposed to be respected and honoured is someone I'm asked to snub..... Don't think that goes down well with me. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 10:50am On Apr 11, 2022 |
Is your name Rebecca ? Anyways Matthew 5:29 says And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell. So woman you have it here . If he greets you answer him but with the way he gives you attention I’m sure he has a crush or feelings for you that why he is giving you unnecessary attention. I’m guessing it’s an Anglican Church AntiMen: |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by DIVINEEVIDENCE: 11:30am On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Madam dem no dey handle adultery with kid gloves! If you and that man are left alone in a secret room una must kpansh. Admit this and realise the dangerous path you're treading. He has dishonored himself by stalking you, a married woman; without consideration for your husband, a fellow minister! You sent a kiss emoji. It was a mistake. But your so-called reverend took it in good faith. He never promptly rebuked or blocked you. He never asked you about it. He never felt offended that a married woman would send such to him, a man of God. Yet, after all that he has continued cornering you and leading you on. Its obvious he assumed you really have adulterous feelings for him and is prepared to get into your pants. I'm typing this with so much anger in me right now. Because I've seen too much of adultery and fornication among Christians that it makes me sick to the stomach. Snub that man. Forget about what people will say. Christ is the one to be honoured in the church above any man. If you must dishonor a man to honour Christ, you should be alright. The people you're considering are already gossipping about you and reverend. Snubbing him will at least exonerate you from the whole rubbish and at least show these people it wasn't what they thought after all. If your husband gets to hear this from neighborhood gossip, then consider yourself a goner in your matrimonial home. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 11:37am On Apr 11, 2022 |
You said it right . I think you see all I’m seeing . The rev is Trying to have something to do with her and she is Naive. Not all men of God are call by God some call themselves and some are called by men . Soon he’ll call her to ask her opinion on something In a private place and from there na friends then partners in sin . The man on his own thru his signals is an adulterous man or a potential adulterous man . It looks like he is sending signals but not bold enough to follow because she hasn’t given him a go ahead . The special treatment shows it all. Even if she avoids him he will keep coming harder . I think she should avoid him completely stop trying to give him face or communicate with him , I’m sure she is always dying to do so . DIVINEEVIDENCE: 3 Likes |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 11:48am On Apr 11, 2022 |
This is a good advice. thestandard: 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 12:00pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
True Roseey0: |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 12:07pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
chioma134:the bolded is very clear to see . The man is seducing her but waiting on her to give a pass before she can press forward . 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 12:34pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
azammi: Yes bro, an A.g church..... I avoid him, he finds a way of coming close,he did it thrice yesterday...Greeted me thwice at different times during ......, held me hands at another time to move back during general prayers somewhere... There was no interaction,but came home wondering wats up with me....Whenever my husband and I are having conversations my mind is always somewhere else cos of this issue... I want to be myself again.... This is not me... 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 1:12pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Do not tell your husband certain thoughts will surround his head. It is best here to apply wisdom. Your actions will ward off your reverend IF HE HAS YOU IN MIND or will distract you from getting fund of him. In church surround yourself around your husband and other persons of interest. Count all the beautiful things you see in your man you don’t find in any one else. Make conversations with your rev brief and almost immediate. AVOID CONTACT.. you should act natural as in smile or laugh when talking with him but literally run. Never have a private meeting with him. Save yourself this stress now. Like you said. It was there before but not it’s intense. Had you handled this earlier on this would not be the case. HANDLE THIS NOW. LET ME ADD. the human mind is fickle, too fickle. You may have subconsciously fed in your mind your rev tone, soft spoken ness perhaps, smile and mannerism which may seem attractive to you and now you’re yearning for it which is actually a problem BECAUSE YOU ARE MARRIED.. you must fill and replace those thoughts and expectations that you are married and with that of your husband’s. You’re on a ticking time bomb. It don’t matter how much you say I can’t cheat on my husband. A simple chat where you appear to like him could just be it and boom.. PS you should have deleted that kiss emoji you mistakenly sent. A mistake is meant to be corrected. Don’t be a fool. 2 Likes |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 1:18pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Next time… should he hold you, muster the courage to ask. “Reverend… is there something? (By this I mean.. is there something you want to tell me?)” it may surprise him and shake him off balance. Should he say “No” or try something like “How was the family… and all that shit to cover it up, reply him then go on to say “oh..I thought you had an info for me” with a straight face. Expect a WhatsApp message that night. There let him know your stand. Of course you know what to say. 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 2:26pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
I’m not saying he is bad but it’s clearly showing that he wants something with the behavior and holding hands I don’t see this as him being concerned with your spiritual growth or anything like that . I think whenever you are in church try to be sitting with your Husband and be with him majority of the time in church and stop giving it too much thought cause the more you think of him the more you will want to see him .What you’re feeling is lust and it’s coming from the attention he is giving you [/b].i’ll like to ask you What are you thoughts when you think about him ? Do you find him attractive? How old are you ? Does your husband give you the same attention you get from rev? , does he make you feel wanted? [b] AntiMen: 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 2:33pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
The reverend has other motives with the way he is seeking attention from a married woman. kobarney: 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 2:55pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
azammi:I'm in the choir, while he is usually busy during service attending to other things, when church closes and there's a procession outside the church , the choristers go out first followed by the priests so there's always an opportunity for him to reach out to me amongst every other person ..... Well my thoughts about him is generally about his teachings in church, how well and soft spoken he is,imagining sitting with him and having conversations like a brother, appreciating that he honours me amongst other people especially when another lady my peer group also married is throwing herself at him but he is not giving her the attention she needs and all that.... So that's basically what I think of.. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 2:57pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
kobarney:. He read the message before I could delete it, so I said it in my mind that God knows I never meant to send it.. Deleting it would be damage control. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by godliman: 3:08pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Adams1989:Does insulting her make you more holy than her? Someone in distress needs help all you can do is add insult to injury. If we can't make things better let us not make them worse. To the OP my candid advice to you is to prayer and fast about this problem. Study God's word and deliberately avoid the Reverend as much as possible but don't make it dramatic. You know deep down in your heart that this is a no go area so just perish the though since it is mission impossible. The only legitimate way is that your own husband and the Reverend's wive must die for you to marry him and to think of that is outrageous. Mean while understand our nature as mortals, sometimes we have this morbid fugitive feelings and impulses that come over us to make us imagine , think or desire the impossible, they die off with time. Imaging me having a crush on the President's wife or on my own blood sister or cousin? I know it is madness and I treat it as such. Thanks and God help you. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 3:21pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Abc2Z: There's this day I stylishly told my hubby about him always calling my name like he's whinning me, my husband said something to defend him like he just likes hailing me that's all. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 3:29pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Well then I can see that you enjoy the attention and the fact that he pick you over another person makes you feel special. And you admire his qualities . Do your husband have the same qualities as him ? . [/b]I’ll advise you on one thing Pray about it use this scripture Proverbs 4:23 Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. Just say O lord help me guard my heart . trust me it works , you can pray it for 10 -30 minutes everyday for 21 days at anytime. If you don’t believe that God can help you add this prayer - O lord please help my Un believe And help me guard my heart - O lord deliver me from temptation.b] Just this two and you will see God intervention . I’m following you so I’ll see your testimony when you post about it . I trust God will work if you’ll humble yourself to Call on him . About those qualities you admire could be a little problem if anything happens in your marriage (maybe a little disagreement)you’ll find yourself running to him because of the qualities you admire and it’s might lead to something. Don’t try to be friends atall just be a church Hi and Hy and please avoid little helps and the urge to ask for him if you need any need arises in the future .unless you have no option . If you find yourself thinking about him then read the Bible The books That talked about Christ will help you a lot . Don’t try to avoid him anymore when he says hi you reply him and work pass trust me with time you’ll see it as normal and won’t regard the attention much . Don’t try to hard with your own strength cause it has already failed you , just pray that prayer and trust God and he will help you . I will be praying for you Rebecca and I’ll be expecting a different story next time . This is my best solution for you now cause you clearly can’t do it on your own . AntiMen: |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 3:35pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Don’t bring it up again with him , most people won’t see a religions leader as being capable of wrong . Follow what I and godliman has said and I promise you an instant result . But wherever you find yourself thinking of him resist the devil and he will flee , the only way to do this is reading and meditating the word of God. Don’t worry about those feelings it will die and If he has any bad intentions it will die . I really feel concerned about this situation cause it seems you’re helpless in your own strength so rely on God through prayers and problem solved . I still feel a hundred percent certain that he Reverend has an ulterior motives . AntiMen: 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 3:40pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Did he reply? AntiMen: |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by AntiMen: 3:47pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by oojehshez(f): 3:55pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
VOsimhen144: Really, but men can get married have a dozen children and still have extra marital affairs...bros go and get wisdom. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 3:57pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
Lol ok then . Be careful next time , that might have sent a wrong signal but who knows . Can you do the prayers I sent you? If yes it would go a long way even if you can do it for 5days . AntiMen: |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by oojehshez(f): 4:01pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
She only asked for opinion not criticism. If una no get solution for her, just waka pass or hold on to see person wey get wisdom to reply. No come dey use your personal frustration affect others online. Not catching cruise with other peoples' problem and causing more depression for the OP. No wonder mental health issue dey dey plenty these days. All these replies fit make person drown. I wonder why we find joy in putting others down. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 4:04pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Indeed this is actually a “crush”. Think of all of the advice we have given you here nectar time you see him. See him as a ticking time bomb to your marriage. Do not be deceived by your mind. The “why me?” Feeling your mind gives you is a trap. You’re beginning to feel special cos he shows you more attention. No. You’re not special you’re MARRIED |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 4:08pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: You would have done damage control o and expressly state it clear that it was a wrong emoji. It’s important to state things clear because… 1. He’s a spiritual head 2. You’re married 3. Married to a Leader under reverend. Scandal easy to start o. 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 4:10pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: You can’t blame your hubby. Na church all of una de and everyone knows your reverend is a goooooood man. Lol. |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by kobarney(m): 4:13pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Ohh after the lips emoji you still texted “Goodbye” and you didn’t delete the error emoji Looooll. This woman!!!! You may have been the one who erroneously ignited this madness afterall ��� |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by Nairalandite: 4:20pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
AntiMen: Based on the information here. I will not in any way suggest what is not suggested here about the reverend. But you as a focus, you called those spiritual stuffs shit or unprintable names which settles it that you are not born again else you won't have said that. It shows that you have work to do on yourself which is that you need to be born again genuinely and not just lip talk. Then you can talk of receiving heaven's help to address this. That crush should be crushed before it crushes you into adultery. Now go to God in prayers to help rid of that crush and ask for more love for your husband. You said the pastor seeks your spiritual growth which is not bad at all. Since your husband seems to be a leader, discuss with him how you can grow if you desire it. Also the impression being created by the special greeting from the Reverend should be addressed by you meeting the reverend there in the open and wisely chip it in that you don't feel good with the way he singles you out of the crowd that you think the growth of everyone should be his concern and not only you that you will be fine if he greets everyone just generally and not the singling out (NOTE:- IN THE OPEN). So you touching your lips in response to his greeting only showed that the devil is hell bent on finishing you only if you agree and you have started agreeing. (1 Thessalonians 5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil).Stop every suggestive gestures and limit your coming around the reverend and don't forget to add the reverend to your prayer any time you are praying against the deadly crush. (James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you). 1 Like |
Re: I'm Crushing Or Liking My Reverend, What Can I Do? by azammi(m): 4:21pm On Apr 11, 2022 |
I wanted to say that part also ,no matter she should have deleted it or said it was an error . Op maybe that’s why he greeted you thrice . kobarney: 1 Like |
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