Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.

Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday (only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone.

At times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act.

Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that

I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

you are very wrong, allow them to enjoy their family ties

Adinije:
Does your wife complain about it?
Does she tell her mum everything that goes on in the house?
Has your MIL in any way cause friction between you and your wife? If your answers to all is No, then don't go and look for trouble that doesn't exist.

Please leave it alone.

Of course they will be discussing everything that goes on in the house, small or big thing. The best thing is to stop it now before it is too late. The wife will not be able to make her own judgement and decision and will always do what the mum tells her. I am a victim of that and will not advise anyone to allow it. The wife will trust her mum more than the husband

chii8:



Mr I know it all, please learn to respect people's opinions.....if your parents still calls you everyday while you're married, there's 89 percent possibility that you people are discussing your spouse and marriage, and that's a third-party interference.Which is not healthy.It also means you are not mature enough to have your mother always keeping tabs on you.The bible weren't written to suit your childishness....If you so much love your mother and want that tight discussions, please divorce and go back to her house and continue that discussion while you are been breastfed.

If you want to get married,then stay married!I don't blame you, this is nland, everything goes..... Please stay off me.

How did you calculate the 89%?

Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.

Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday (only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone.

At times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act.

Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that

I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

I can understand. You don't have a good relationship with your mother-in-law.

Just warn your wife not to discuss the affairs of your home with her mother.

Let them do their talking, but whenever she tries to ask how the house is running, she should cut it out and let her mother know it's personal

Totilopussylick:
She is simply checking up on her daughter to know if your a responsible man enough for her .

She wan marry her give another man?

That's how they destroy their daughter's home.

Encyclopedia1:
If she no born am u go see am marry?

Which kain talk be this one now?

mariahAngel:


That they don't call you everyday does not mean it is the same with everyone.
Some close-knit families just like to connect that way.
It ain't that hard. Just a phone call.

They're afraid of not talking with her. No choice!

nasonaso:


Sorry to say, I might be wrong but I feel you come from either a dysfunctional home or a home where your family backstabs each other( no love in the family).

You have a skewed idea how well knitted family works. So leaving everything (to cleave) invariably means setting boundaries( leaving your family) right.

I hope you are not married cause I see you as someone that comes into a family and cause katakata.

Thank you. You'll know them. Products of dysfuntional families

MrDoGood:


I can understand. You don't have a good relationship with your mother-in-law.

Just warn your wife not to discuss the affairs of your home with her mother.

Let them do their talking, but whenever she tries to ask how the house is running, she should cut it out and let her mother know it's personal

No sane person calls someone every day.

nasonaso:



Not difficult to know them. Always coming into families to break bonds, create hatred among family members na dem be this make nollywood de show them. Always controlling the simp men that marries them.

she just concluded that talking to someones mother or dad constantly translates to discussing marital issues how myopic can you get. We know your type I just pity the man inside the bottle.

You've said it all. God bless you !

chii8:



Mr I know it all, please learn to respect people's opinions.....if your parents still calls you everyday while you're married, there's 89 percent possibility that you people are discussing your spouse and marriage, and that's a third-party interference.Which is not healthy.It also means you are not mature enough to have your mother always keeping tabs on you.The bible weren't written to suit your childishness....If you so much love your mother and want that tight discussions, please divorce and go back to her house and continue that discussion while you are been breastfed.

If you want to get married,then stay married!I don't blame you, this is nland, everything goes..... Please stay off me.

na wa oo.. too many kids on nairaland getting married. no wonder there is a high rate of divorce, husband killing wives and wives killing husband.

Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.

Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday (only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone.

At times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act.

Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that

I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

Op tou are still very much a kid, who shouldn't have gotten married at this time. it is a pity you are married and still having such a child behavior, i know for sure your wife is going to suffer a great deal in this marriage, i only pity her. Your jealousy and childishness will be a great undoing to her. i truly pity her. Someone who gave birth to your wife, nurtured her to be that virtuous women you get married to. is now automatically evil and no longer relevant in her life. you are just a big joker. Someone you should take like your own mother. i pity you. this is just the beginning and the end of that your marriage. The only time you can ever try to limit their communication is only when your mother in-law is feeding her daughter bad ideas to ruin your marriage. I am married and my mother-in-law communicates with my wife every day and she give her good advice, which i am very proud of. There was even one time i was at home and my wife wanted to go stay in her mum's place because she needed to fix something even after she has taken permission from me, she called her mum to inform her she is coming over to stay, my mother-in-law has to come me to know if I approve of it and I told her yes. If your mum in-law is a good woman, don't ever try to stop your wife from communicating with her.

Dirkcoyt:
Many people in the world are naive and suffer greater consequences for things they didn’t take serious .

When you take a walk it’s is not the big tree that make you stagger to fall , it is the tiniest of stubborn root that makes us chip stagger and stumble on our way to success.

We all can see the big tree so we avoid it but those small stubborn roots on floor we cannot see them cause they’re too tiny . Hence, they’re always the ones to fall us off .

I had a similar encounter with a girl . I instantly saw this and ended the relationship immediately cause I know where it will end . They always happen like harmless situation but the greater danger is to dominate your marriage .

Cause to be honest with you . There is no way I’m the world they won’t discussion your marriage or family . Things you both adjust on will get conflicted views from her mother . She will run your home to ruins . Nearest is dearest . The one she becomes nearer to becomes dearer too . You both deserve some respect . Freedom shouldn’t mock boundaries

The wife will be naive and wouldn’t believe her mother will mislead her . So whatever her mother says will always be right even if you tell her not to do it . This will lead to constant bickering and when the Centre can’t hold . There is a divorce , the kids will suffer , you both will suffer emotionally , financially and trust will be a hard thing to give your next partner . And your mental health may never be the same .


It’s better to nip it in the bud now if you want your marriage to work . I wish you the best . Your concerns are valid don’t be naive .

OP,
This is the best advise for you.

Don't mind all those nairalanders forming they come from good homes. Why would two adults be talking every morning and night without digressing from their discussion. You all know it's not possible yet you all are forming good homes.

Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.

Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday (only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone.

At times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act.

Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that

I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

If it were your mother doing the calling I am sure you won't complain. Broaden your heart bro.

Ezeego1:



Which kain talk be this one now?

Oya come and beat me.

Adinije:
Does your wife complain about it?
Does she tell her mum everything that goes on in the house?
Has your MIL in any way cause friction between you and your wife? If your answers to all is No, then don't go and look for trouble that doesn't exist.

Please leave it alone.

If the man does same thing believe me , the wife will create threads for it all over the places

What kind of man are you?

Did her family sell your wife to you? Are you now her slave master?

Should you not be even worried if your MIL doesn't call your wife to keep her in check? Except you have evidence that they're plotting against you, there's no big deal!

Or maybe you hate your MIL? Because on these calls, even you should say "let me greet your mom too"!

Be happy and enjoy marriage. You cant live life alone after marriage -- you'll forever need the support of your in-laws, so never attempt to destroy that bridge.

Good luck!

ttoyetade:


Of course they will be discussing everything that goes on in the house, small or big thing. The best thing is to stop it now before it is too late. The wife will not be able to make her own judgement and decision and will always do what the mum tells her. I am a victim of that and will not advise anyone to allow it. The wife will trust her mum more than the husband

That is if you are married to a foolish woman. and your motherinlaw and evil selfish woman like Patience Ozokwo.. in the movies.

Mide70:
calling her morning and evening of everyday? Don't you people know the meaning of marriage ?

Kiddo you are the one who doesn't know the meaning of marriage.. Maybe you are mistaking marriage for some kind of self imposed prison. Mind you your son inlaw and daughter inlaws will do same to you.

Hahaha, she cannot call her daughter again?

My wife calls her mum every day too. That's how it has been since over 5 years. Nothing to worry about.

You should not loose sleep over this, unless you have your reservations that you don’t want to share. People should maintain close bonding with their family,most especially their parents!

It's okay as long as your wife has not put up a strange behaviour. It's really not easy for all the mother-in-laws

vickydevoka:

If the man does same thing believe me , the wife will create threads for it all over the places

My husband speaks with his parents all the time and I don't have a problem with that. I speak with mine too and he too don't care.

Mide70:
Please I need your opinion on this issue.

Though before I got married I discovered my mother inlaw calls all her daughters both married and unmarried everyday (only 3 ladies no boys) and they fear her to the bone.

At times every morning and night just to talk to them but I believe when they get married they need privacy and respect but this is not the case for my mother-in-law and I detest such act.

Mind you I'm not against call or trying to break the bond but I believe this is marriage. I'm looking for a way to stop all that

I'm I wrong or right to take that step ?

So because she's married to you, she shouldn't talk to her mother again? Did you buy her credit? Some men Sha. If I be your wife, you go complain tire. I call my mum everyday and if I didn't call she'll call me. Is the calling eating your food , withdrawing your money from the bank. It's not even that she comes to stay in your house for a long time. Haba. K**ll her now so she won't have access to her daughter because she's married you. N*onsense

ttoyetade:


Of course they will be discussing everything that goes on in the house, small or big thing. The best thing is to stop it now before it is too late. The wife will not be able to make her own judgement and decision and will always do what the mum tells her. I am a victim of that and will not advise anyone to allow it. The wife will trust her mum more than the husband

U need to earn her trust, that all.

Exactly my thoughts

Adinije:
Does your wife complain about it?
Does she tell her mum everything that goes on in the house?
Has your MIL in any way cause friction between you and your wife? If your answers to all is No, then don't go and look for trouble that doesn't exist.

Please leave it alone.

aestake:

After killing their husbands, why won't they be lonely?

I want to believe a teenager is typing this

Encyclopedia1:

Oya come and beat me.

I don't beat women anyway,

If you're a man you for collect wotowoto

vickydevoka:

If the man does same thing believe me , the wife will create threads for it all over the places

The man will be labelled mummy's boy and the wife will start acting somehow. Now the table has changed and nobody is seeing the call as invasion of privacy again.

Hypocrites!!!

My wife mom calls her daily and i like that she does.

She nurtures and set her brain to reset mode whenever she wants to claim "woke" or be disrespectful to me.

I would say its all depend on who the mother-in-law is and the kind of principles she's trying to impact (instill) on the daughter/wife.

Na really uncle mind your lane. Her calling isn't affecting the relationship with his wife then why stop it?

duduade:
She might just be lonely and loves to hear and converse with her children everyday ...

When she calls your wife and you are there do they discuss about you

As the mother ever accused you of maltreating her daughter....

Uncle mind your lane...

Bros, don't start what you can't handle!

Honestly, I don't think you need to open this Pandora Box. Just bone the issue of calls between them provided it doesn't affect you.

this thing is actually a deal breaker and can send ones emotions cold ...Also duirng this discussions, the wife tells the mum everything going on in the home to as afar as recording them to feedback her mum...its really a marriage killer. couples need space and privacy