Oh
I see

^is your boyfriend a nler?

just curious.

Dyt: Salam
I hav nt seen DEOLS in a long time

Tbaba, I hope u got my mail?

I did!!

tbaba1234:

I did!!

Thanks Tbaba, I have received the parcel; may Almighty Allah continue to shower His blessings and favour on you.

I am very grateful.

Jazak-Allah Khairan

Are there any Islamic wedding planners in 9ja?

Someone that can plan a wedding reception within the limits of the sunnah.

Just good halal fun.

Just wondering!!!

^ wedding planners are all same
You will just have to tell them the concept you want

tpia@:
^is your boyfriend a nler?

just curious.

I am married madam

I created a thread but i got no response, so i decided to post it here:

To protect our youth from falling into zina (physical and of the eyes), we should allow them get married while they are still in school.

do you agree? Why and why not?

I. Maturity and responsibility - Being mature is often times independent of age and parents should be able to assess if the child can take up the responsibility of raising a home. Save them from falling into Zina by getting them married early or allow them to obtain all the degrees.

II. Financial responsibility- Most youths are unable to take care of families financially, Do the families (bride and groom) support them until they are through with their education and on their two feet.

At least they are married,right??

III. Taqwa not marriage - Some argue that taqwa is the cure not marriage... So what are the ways of building taqwa within the general populace of muslim youth.

Iv. Gender segregation: Our tertiary institutions are mixed and free interaction between both sexes does lead to Zina.

These are some arguments for and against, i found online

Argument for early marriage by Zeshan:

I always find questions like: Should parents allow children to get married while in school a little strange. Because Islam already allows them to get married at a young age but we think that parents have a right to stop them?

Please do not misunderstand me. I do believe that parents have a big role in this matter but they are our advisers not our supervisors. I know most of us (the muslim community) is not ready to hear what i'm going to mention, but it is my personal opinion that a shift in our perception of this whole concept needs to occur.

Secondly, one of the purposes of marriage is finding tranquility and comfort in another person. And people at a young age need that most. They can start to feel lonely, have low self esteem etc. Most people think that girlfriends and boyfriends are only for sex. But most youngsters get into these relationships also to avoid feelings of loneliness and have that partner to support them emotionally. And what is marriage except an amazing friendship after all?

Thirdly- Marriage today is not only a solution to physical zina (haraam relationships) but also as a protection from the zina of the eyes Watching pornography). Most young muslims suffer from this problem as well. And this leaves their emaan destroyed. And most never recover from it.

I highly encourage marriage for young muslims in between the ages of 16-20. But not without prior education and training. I believe there needs to be a system set up. A model. That we can apply in our communities in North America. A balance between the parents concerns and the children's needs. I am currently working to create a model and if anybody is interested in working with me, you can contact me. I am in the beginning stages of this. Keep in mind I myself am 22 and not yet married. And that is the very reason I understand the importance of marriage at an early age. We discredit our youngsters quite easily, without giving them a real chance. And then we restrict them because they are "incapable".

Also shaykh, i always hear how the sahaba and sahaabiyaat were so mature at a young age so they got married. How can we help our children grow in the same way? ANd if we can replicate that, then perhaps it would make it easier for young muslims to carry a good marriage.

Also have you heard of teh concept of High School sweet hearts? I think that's a beautiful concept. Can you imagine experiencing all the things in high school with a person that you will spend the rest of your life with in shaa ALLAH? That brings in so much richness into the marriage. So many memories to recall. And i know people are worried about hearts changing, which is a legitimate concern, but have you ever noticed how your high school friends are mainly the ones you always remain close with? Just because you've been part of something together?

All this is POSSIBLE! and can actually bring out positive and responsible adults out of our youth. But we need to help them. Obviously. Nobody learns to live from the womb.

As for financial problems, we can easily make a plan for our children. We can go to the bank and make a retirement plan for ourselves, but cannot make a marriage plan for our young muslims?

I guess to summarize: We need to get with the times!
There is a lot more to this, but i hope i presented the idea clearly.

And ALLAH knows best.

Against by Farook:

No. That's too easy an answer, and doesnt cover the problem. Most youth today are too immature to get married and SUSTAIN that relationship. There's a tendency to believe in fairy tale marriages. Getting kids married at 16 or 18 - by and large - will result in more divorces once they realize the gravity of what they've gotten themselves into.

Also, marriage HELPS to protect from zina, but it is not the cure. The cure is taqwa, and that develops through trial and fitna.

Thirdly, marriage entails responsibility - financial, emotional, and physical. Most kids only look at the third aspect, and not too much attention is given to the first two. In today's society, kids aren't mature enough to hold that responsibility.

Is it possible for a 16 year old to successfully get married and hold it down responsibly? Of course. But those cases are far and few in between.

Your views are appreciated:::

^ not gotten anything

Dyt: ^ not gotten anything

I know, You'll get it this week Insha Allah... Sorry for the delay

Ok
Thnx

Dyt:

I am married madam

Who is your threat meant for?

Has your "man" been flirting around?

In any case, have your "man" publicly identify himself as married to "you" (whether true or not).

"He" should open a thread stating he's dyt's husband.

Include the thread in your signature.

Anyone who "touches" him after that, and after you've informed them of your signature, should engage in the faceoff with you.

tbaba1234: I created a thread but i got no response, so i decided to post it here:

To protect our youth from falling into zina (physical and of the eyes), we should allow them get married while they are still in school.

do you agree? Why and why not?

I. Maturity and responsibility - Being mature is often times independent of age and parents should be able to assess if the child can take up the responsibility of raising a home. Save them from falling into Zina by getting them married early or allow them to obtain all the degrees.

II. Financial responsibility- Most youths are unable to take care of families financially, Do the families (bride and groom) support them until they are through with their education and on their two feet.

At least they are married,right??

III. Taqwa not marriage - Some argue that taqwa is the cure not marriage... So what are the ways of building taqwa within the general populace of muslim youth.

Iv. Gender segregation: Our tertiary institutions are mixed and free interaction between both sexes does lead to Zina.

These are some arguments for and against, i found online

Argument for early marriage by Zeshan:




Against by Farook:





Your views are appreciated:::

Were you sleeping before? You had this thread and went to post elsewhere.

Tbaba, marriage is a highly personal matter. There is no one-size-fits-all answer to these questions. Parents have a duty to help their children grow and develop in a comprehensive manner religiously, academically, financially and in terms of maturity. If the parents have done all of these, young Muslims will be eager to marry earlier and we can expect that most of such marriages will be successful Insha Allah.

We as young people have to be responsible as well. You don't go flirting, sleeping around and expect a happy marriage because you have not trained yourself in a way that will encourage that.

You need to forego a lot of fickle stuff and focus on the important things. Even by doing so, you will have problems but at least you know you are doing your best to surmount them.

they both made good points though i quite agree with Zeshan.How i wish.........

tpia@:


Who is your threat meant for?

Has your "man" been flirting around?

In any case, have your "man" publicly identify himself as married to "you" (whether true or not).

"He" should open a thread stating he's dyt's husband.

Include the thread in your signature.

Anyone who "touches" him after that, and after you've informed them of your signature, should engage in the faceoff with you.

And wat is madam Tpiah on abt
*bends mouth*
Can't one write wateva, wherever?

It is possible for young people to marry only if they would have been taught(which isnt quite easy) what marriage entails. Society does a lot in shaping us and if people live in societies where such marriages are the norm, it wouldnt be such a big deal.

From Ilorin up north, it is common to find young people marry as early as d age of 18 and they live happily. But in such cases d girls are d young ones while d men can be btwn 20 and 25.

Maturity and all wouldn't matter in such a case cos they av bn groomed and earlier on exposed to the concept of dating, and marriage.They may have been more mature on marriage matters than a 25yr old from another place.

The best thing would be for parents to groom their children into understanding how important this is.

Dyt:

And wat is madam Tpiah on abt
*bends mouth*
Can't one write wateva, wherever?

Just answer the questions and do the other things i mentioned, thanks.

Since many people here arent from those societies, all that was mentioned by the Z man become important. Before 25 most people havent gotten a grip on life and may not know what exactly they want.

Child rearing is another case. I personally think the solution to that would be to marry early and start having children later. Going to school while having children may not be good for both mother and child

Child rearing is another case. I personally think the solution to that would be to marry early and start having children later. Going to school while having children may not be good for both mother and child
[/quote]Allah is the one that determines offsprings not human.

Asalam alaykum

Tbaba, are you still around? I'm interested in the video too. Hope I'm not asking too late.

Once i send to those that already asked, i would ask for new orders

Ok thanks.

@tbaba,pls dont forget o.

tbaba1234: Once i send to those that already asked, i would ask for new orders

Bros, am yet to receive anything... I also sent u an email containing a p.o box address.. Kindly let me know.

Kabir

Tbaba, still waiting

the issue of marriage contracts? I am not done with it





btw, when this thread reaches a 100 pages, there should be celebration or what d'u think

deols, caught ya!(beaming) good to hear from you. we thought you had abandoned us. still on this marriage contract thingy, I have a men's version of a clause to be stated into that contract. I will sneak it up on you guys later. ma salam.

deols: the issue of marriage contracts? I am not done with it





btw, when this thread reaches a 100 pages, there should be celebration or what d'u think

Bring it on. Let's tackle it together.

talking about pages, I was amazed at the rate the AFCON thread was growing yesterday. Reached almost a 100 pages within the space of two hours or thereabout.
So what are going to celebrate this one with when it gets to 100? Me likey celebration o.

we can celebrate it by changing the status of one of the single to double.

deols: the issue of marriage contracts? I am not done with it





btw, when this thread reaches a 100 pages, there should be celebration or what d'u think

Longest time Deols, how are you doing?

I don't think we have any topic that have reached 100 pages before, on ISLAM FOR MUSLIMS thread. Bring on the e-celebration and let the jubilation start.

On a serious note, we have enough members on this thread that can always contribute meaningfully on any topic raised, but most of us just decide to visit this thread once in a while. I think is time we show more interest on this thread in order to educate ourselves more on the right path of ISLAM.

Thanks to Tbaba, Maclatunji and few other that always contribute on the thread almost everyday while most of us are away on other thread .

Let us now try as much as possible to be more dedicated on this thread please.


Maa Salam

Walks in
Me still single

^^ you said a few posts ago that you're married?