sino:

sister, nobody yet o, i don't know what they are waiting for o, but i pray Allah make it easy for each and everyone of us amin.

BahPulo:


ok but have u become a muslim yet? that's the only way you can marry a muslim woman

kemiola89: Subhanallah!!! So this thread is still alive? Really missed out a great deal on this thread, well it better being late than never.
Why ye all searching for a perfect partner? little wonder why there isn't any nikkhai testimony yet.

Sir cuba: Sallam aleykum musliminah and muslimah...need muslims fiend for islamic and life activities chatin ...2246DAD1 my pin...pls strictly muslims..jumaat mubaraq

Dyt: Is dat Busayhour?

Dyt: Is dat Busayhour?

Dyt: My eyes were seein triple?

zayhal: @Sino. Don't make the mistake of taking such woman back, undertaking or not. A woman that can pour acid on her husband, the father of her children, over a rumour of taking a second wife is not worthy to live with. Haba. She's a murderer in the making. If she claims to have repented and the man eventually takes another wife, be rest assured that that home will know no peace.

kemiola89: Subhanallah!!! So this thread is still alive? Really missed out a great deal on this thread, well it better being late than never.
Why ye all searching for a perfect partner? little wonder why there isn't any nikkhai testimony yet.

busar: Av really missed a lot,nw back from break

The Fitrah, Charting A Course For The Young....

I am at a stage in my life that i have begun to worry about these things because i feel that in our societies, the fitrah is constantly under attack.My worry is for myself, my future kids and young muslim children who will experience a lot more than we have ever experienced. I feel it is a crisis situation...

We can pray five times a day, memorize the Qu'ran, wear the hijab, grow a beard but all of these will just be shallow physical activities if our fitrah is dead...

So how do we tell if our fitrah is dying or dead?

When watching a movie, do you see inappropriate scene and it doesn't bother you? If that is the case, your fitrah is dying...

Do you watch the news and see people dying but change the channel to watch some comedy show? Your fitrah is dead....

Do you listen to people talking badly about another without compassion for that person? Do you contribute to the discussion by bashing the person as well? Your fitrah is dying or dead....

Allah says in the Quran (roughly translated):

5:41 O Messenger. let not those grieve thee, who race each other into disbelief: (whether it be) among those who say "We believe" with their lips but whose hearts have no faith;......

Our beliefs transcend physical actions, we must also be willing to guard our hearts and the hearts of the young from corruption... We have to look inside and see what kinds of persons, we have become... Our sense of decency and humanity has to be evaluated constantly and it can only be done by ourselves..

Allah created all human beings with an innate disposition to truth, decency, gratitude, mercy and compassion but young muslim children are exposed to so much filth at really early ages. It does not matter whether they go to school, arabic school or are home schooled, it does not matter if they have all of the Quran memorised .... They will be exposed to so much... The 'scum' industry for instance is worth more than google, microsoft and all these technological giants combined. Your once innocent baby would lose its innocence someday, parents and aspiring parents must be prepared for this....

I have a number of practical suggestions based on my personal reflections and from lectures i have listened to to help preserve at least some part of the fitrah of our kids... I hope someone finds this useful....

i. Listen to your children: When yusuf (A.S) had a dream, the first person he spoke to, was his father. This is not just coincidental, a relationship must have been built between father and son such that the son felt comfortable telling his father about his dream... The fact that young boys are usually closer to their mothers make this even more remarkable...

The first time, your son comes across a filthy image or inappropriate language, are you the first person he goes to? or would he rather keep it to himself?... We must create an environment that makes this happen.... Actively listen to your children even when they have nothing important to say, make it a habit to listen to them such that they can come to you with even the most trivial issue and get a listening ear... Hopefully, when they have problems in school or with friends, you are their go-to guy/girl....

And remember you are not too busy, your real work begins at home....

ii. Instill in them a sense of purpose and responsibility: It is important to help your young children realize that Allah put them on the earth for a reason and they should find whatever they are good at and give it to Allah... The older kids should have a sense of responsibility over the younger ones, you have to instill in them the willingness to act like leaders when they are with the younger ones...

iii. Good company: Be around people that make you a better person... Help your kid grow up in an environment where they will be surrounded by people that will make them better... Even if you have to move....

iv. Practical examples: It is easy to tell your child that the prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) was very charitable but what those that mean in real life.... It means the child must be willing to give away her/his favorite toy to the needy... Take your kids shopping to buy gifts for their cousins and not for themselves.... Help them understand the practicality of been charitable.... You are instilling something in them.... Many times, we indulge ourselves and our kids, this destroys our sense of gratitude.. It kills our fitrah... Let them get used to getting stuff for other people.

v. Respect: In our societies, there is nothing that is held up in regard. Everything is subject to ridicule.... We must try to instill in our kids a sense of respect for their elders whether related or unrelated, their teachers, cultures and races.... We have to lead by example in this regard and show them that not everything is open for ridicule.

vi. Reflection: We have to raise kids that are people of reflection, this can be done by exposure to literature that would broaden their horizons.... Fortunately, we have an incredible resource in the Quran. Have regular discussions with the family about ayahs of the Qu'ran based on scholarly references... You do not have to read a tafseer to them, just regular, normal discussions....You will begin to see the world differently as every event would reminds you of an ayah in the Qu'ran.... This has worked for me personally.

I felt i had to share this, i hope someone finds some benefit in it...

https://www.nairaland.com/1066918/fitrah-charting-course-young

tbaba1234: ^When is what?

sino:
No, don't gerrit twisted, brothers and sisters only looking for preferred patners. Ayam sure you've got a list of wants and wants not

tbaba1234: One of my old posts, still relevant though:

kemiola89: prefered partners? Goodluck with the quest for 'prefered partner'! Lol
as per the "want and want not" wish i'd have specifications on how my ideal partner should be and what he should be made of, but no i dont, i take my man the way he comes! Weird uhm? Yeah! My heart does the chosing for me. Apart from the fact that he's got to be a praticing muslim.

kemiola89: Not surprised most people r gonna find that weird. Guess that makes me a human. Lol! To each his/her each own taste.
Nb; when i say no specifications doesnt mean i wont be attracted to the person first before getting down the lane with him. All i seek is Allaah's guidance when chosing. Like seriously? Do ladies even get to choose?