Usually when people wed the preacher says "through better or worse through sickness and health to death do us part" but sometimes in a marriage things can get hectic. Things can go from so good to beyond worse (or so you think). But one of the worse things your spouse can do is betray your trust and your vows by infidelity. Cheating, the word makes me want pull a Bernadine right now!But seriously how strong is our vows, are you willing to stay despite your mate committing that blatant disregard towards your matrimony. Is the act unforgivable but never forgettable and NOT ENOUGH to stay? To me, This was one of the reasons why some people never get married.They knew that they will not be able to keep those vows for long.

//

chaircover:

Funny enough many vows dont say anything specifically about infidelity.

this is how i see it. it's an individual to individual basis. there are some situations where the spouse cheats without a conscience or a care. it's not even about lust anymore but only about fulfilling their desires.

but then there are other situations where they may fall prey to loins over logic

it depends on the relationship,i don't think it's an automatic answer. but i do believe when you take those vows make sure you put some serious thoughts in to the meaning behind the words and how much you're willing to endure to uphold them.

Vows are nothing more than a roman decree that was put into law at a time when the roman elite took wives of under priviledged peasants at will who had shown "proof of fertility". This led to an uprising by the civility and the senate was forced to put the "one man-one wife" rule into law (and into religion which was a strong force in managing the masses) and together came the vows and all the trappings that came with it. Everything about Christianity today has roman custom background.

What about forgiveness?

Suppose your spouse is a "good person" in everything, providing for you and the children -emotional and physical support- but he has a will power/self-control problem. Would you throw away 20 good years or try to work with your spouse to get some counselling/therapy?

Now, once any-one breaks the marriage vow (covenant with God) you have a right to divorce that person, if you so desire. (Remember that David had cheated and he was a Good man.)
Lust can get the best of all of us. All we need is the opportunity and the right environmen

@deal_ordea. . . I'm using my phone to type but I'll do my best to explain a few things to you. First of all, the idea of "cheating" and "vows" was borne out of economic and political reasons and not religious sentiments. Human beings are still animals and no amount of civilization and enlightenment can take away the basic instincts (check out the lootings in the london riots, a lot of which were commited by people who ought to know better). The term "cheating" is not different from new age terms such as "masochistic", "mysogynist" and "patrochial". Read through your bible (especially the OT)and you'll see several cleat cases where the biblical god's choosen individuals had not only several wives but also concubines (mistresses). Last time I checked, the only direct comment on the "one man and wife" issue was from Paul (NOT Jesus) and he gave that as logical advice and not as a message from "above". Look, in my short 31yrs of life on earth, I've noticed something. . . You are either cheating or being cheated on. It's only a matter of time before it happens. Women do it a lot but they are more discrete and "coded" about it than men. You are still quite young but when you get into a long term relationship with a lady, observe yourself each passing year and see if the flame is still the same. Women lose interest in relationships much faster than men (same thing in the animal kingdom). You can't blame them when they are constantly bombarded by men who are interested in them and if a guy whose half as nice/good as you but much richer than you comes along, she will dump you in a heartbeat without thinking twice. Some of them who have a conscience will start acting funny and doing negative things to provoke you to break the relationship. The term "cheating" is void. Humans always crave for more and better when they get bored. That being said, I have never "cheated" on anyone I dated rather it's the other way round. When you look at things from a broader perspective, it's all about human nature. Nuff said!

marraige vows are vows only if you are saying it before God, sometimes though, people say things and they are bound by their utterances whether before God or not. Marraige is a convenant that is supposed to be kept. it is only the Grace of God that can make one forgive and forget, a cheating partner, especially if it is the woman that is cheating on the husband; you will hear so many men saying, she is out and gone!!!. The Bible says, we should forgive 149 times a day, no matter what the offense might be. It is going to be God's Grace that would see one through.