I feel so tired of being a first daughter. It feels my life is full of running errands and doing things for everyone but myself. I feel like a servant. I don't know who I am or my what I want to do in life. Im at home all day doing nothing but serving others. I feel so sad and tired of it whenever I remember I will still have to do it all again tomorrow not knowing when this will all end.

I see my siblings moving forward in life and I only have a Highschool certificate. My father didnt train me in school and frustrated all my mother's attempts to further my education. Yet all my siblings were put in school. I don't even have the time or mental space to run a business.

I want to leave and be on my own. I want to be able to hear myself. I want to wake up in the morning not thinking of what others will eat or errands that need to be ran. I don't want to think of lunch or dinner or worry about anyone else but myself. I don't even want to hear my name because it is always followed by one request or the other.

This holiday season I kept on thinking about how much I didn't want any family or guests to come visit because it would only mean more work for me. I would be the one living in the kitchen running around like a maid. It makes me feel so ashamed and less than. When people at home remember my running around they then start with the praises "Oh what would we do without you?", "Our second mother." "So hard working, what a strong girl." I don't want any of those praises. They make me feel worse because I don't do any of this by choice. I don't care for compliments for something I have no option but to do. Would any of them still say good things about me if I decided I was tired of living like this, of being at their beck and call? I want to be left alone. Because of these feelings I don't have any desire to have children. The thought of living like this again taking care of children makes me sad and I feel tired at the thought. I feel drained physically, emotionally and mentally. Sometimes I wonder if this is how it feels for all children and if I am just not cut out for this.

Pele My dear.

The only issue I see here is ur inability to further on ur education. But others, my dear I can only said congratulations. What you are going thru now is a training which will surely be useful to you much later wen you start ur own family.

In our society, first born are saddled with loads of responsibilities but at the detriment of your self growth. Han Han I don't want it




By the way av sent you email. Try reply

OFunke24:
I feel so tired of being a first daughter. It feels my life is full of running errands and doing things for everyone but myself. I feel like a servant. I don't know who I am or my what I want to do in life. Im at home all day doing nothing but serving others. I feel so sad and tired of it whenever I remember I will still have to do it all again tomorrow not knowing when this will all end.

I see my siblings moving forward in life and I only have a Highschool certificate. My father didnt train me in school and frustrated all my mother's attempts to further my education. Yet all my siblings were put in school. I don't even have the time or mental space to run a business.

I want to leave and be on my own. I want to be able to hear myself. I want to wake up in the morning not thinking of what others will eat or errands that need to be ran. I don't want to think of lunch or dinner or worry about anyone else but myself. I don't even want to hear my name because it is always followed by one request or the other.

This holiday season I kept on thinking about how much I didn't want any family or guests to come visit because it would only mean more work for me. I would be the one living in the kitchen running around like a maid. It makes me feel so ashamed and less than. When people at home remember my running around they then start with the praises "Oh what would we do without you?", "Our second mother." "So hard working, what a strong girl." I don't want any of those praises. They make me feel worse because I don't do any of this by choice. I don't care for compliments for something I have no option but to do. Would any of them still say good things about me if I decided I was tired of living like this, of being at their beck and call? I want to be left alone. Because of these feelings I don't have any desire to have children. The thought of living like this again taking care of children makes me sad and I feel tired at the thought. I feel drained physically, emotionally and mentally. Sometimes I wonder if this is how it feels for all children and if I am just not cut out for this.

I understand how you feel...It is all a matter of time

Try to take advantage of your access to the internet to educate yourself informally. Cheers!!!

No pressure on me .




Sorry Dear.

Just communicate with your family and move away.

Most first daughters are the little mum in the family. I think God wired them so.
Our Ada is everything you would wish for in an elder sister and more. She has always been like that right from when we were much younger. God bless her for me.

If you are interested in earning extra income in this Tinubu economy, you can connect with me through my bio

Let's hear it baby.

Find a way to be independent and try and move away from home. You deserve a life too

I feel for you.


My elder sister is my world., I would do anything for her. Cos she's the bond that hold our family.


I pray that God answers her prayers, Amen

OFunke24:
I feel so tired of being a first daughter. It feels my life is full of running errands and doing things for everyone but myself. I feel like a servant. I don't know who I am or my what I want to do in life. Im at home all day doing nothing but serving others. I feel so sad and tired of it whenever I remember I will still have to do it all again tomorrow not knowing when this will all end.

I see my siblings moving forward in life and I only have a Highschool certificate. My father didnt train me in school and frustrated all my mother's attempts to further my education. Yet all my siblings were put in school. I don't even have the time or mental space to run a business.

I want to leave and be on my own. I want to be able to hear myself. I want to wake up in the morning not thinking of what others will eat or errands that need to be ran. I don't want to think of lunch or dinner or worry about anyone else but myself. I don't even want to hear my name because it is always followed by one request or the other.

This holiday season I kept on thinking about how much I didn't want any family or guests to come visit because it would only mean more work for me. I would be the one living in the kitchen running around like a maid. It makes me feel so ashamed and less than. When people at home remember my running around they then start with the praises "Oh what would we do without you?", "Our second mother." "So hard working, what a strong girl." I don't want any of those praises. They make me feel worse because I don't do any of this by choice. I don't care for compliments for something I have no option but to do. Would any of them still say good things about me if I decided I was tired of living like this, of being at their beck and call? I want to be left alone. Because of these feelings I don't have any desire to have children. The thought of living like this again taking care of children makes me sad and I feel tired at the thought. I feel drained physically, emotionally and mentally. Sometimes I wonder if this is how it feels for all children and if I am just not cut out for this.

This shouldn't be the fate of a first daughter.

I faced the same challenges being the first child and daughter at the same time followed by 4 boys and my mum would not allow them to work, I was the only person that use to do the house chores.
I would go to her shop before going to school in the morning to work and also return to shop in the evening to work.

My mum would be shouting on me that I will go out and get married, she does not want me to put her to shame. I see shege, if small water pure on the floor while fetching water she would beat me and lock me out till 12 midnight, sometimes she scattered my school bag and clothes on the street.

I thank God for my life, I am married now.

If you're tired of your situation rebel against them. You don't deserve to be treated like this, firstborn or not. I hope you will find someone who would sponsor you to school out of kindness.

Sarang:
Find a way to be independent and try and move away from home. You deserve a life too

Independent like doing runz shey.. just cut to the chase. Cos she hardly have a degree to get a good job

dawnomike:
I understand how you feel...It is all a matter of time

Try to take advantage of your access to the internet to educate yourself informally. Cheers!!!

I love this bro..... Try take advantage of the internet when you are less busy.
It helps too

Being first child as a daughter mean nothing.the issue is your family.tell them this is what you want for yourself not to see you as a mere woman.Nigeria ain't smile to anybody,if you don't plan yourself against tomorrow you will surly find your body where you can never envisage.

I understand your burdens. First, why have they refused to send you to school? Can't they fix you somewhere to learn a skill? However, I won't advise you to leave the house now, although you didn't state your gender. As a girl, do it for this season your glorification is coming. As a boy if you're above 18yrs, get out and work for yourself

My fiancee is the first born of her family, she always tell me it's much of a responsibility to be the first born.




So, I always give her extra patient treatment Cox I don't want to add to all her stress..


Finally, you'll be OK dear.

You're simply exhausted. You need a break. Look out for any opportunity to get out of home for sometime. It will help you to recover or discover yourself.

Why others dey go school wey you nor dey go. I hope your parents are not doing preferential treatment for them

If as a first daughter your parents did not go the extra mile to prepare and set you up for the responsibilities you will bear then it means they shortchanged you!

The only problem I have here is not sending you to school….as for the chores part,you just have to tell them that you are tired sometimes and lock up…..if they go hungry for sometime,,nobody go tell them to enter kitchen…..
I have only 1 sister and she is the eldest….we all help out with chores right from when we were kids….
If she go out and you no cook….na hunger go finish you.

At first I thought the topic was about being a first daughter, with regards being a daughter of a sitting President or Governor.
Anyway, I feel you should buckle up and tell your parents that you want to further your education. They won't eat you or scold you.

New year new resolutions

1. Itemise what your hopes and ambitions for the next 5 years .. realistically
2. Identify ways of accomplishing them..... via Internet, adult education or what have you .
3. Use any vocational skills you have to create additional sources of income, or learn sth new.
4. Take steps of faith, expect obstacles initially, but push past these with firm resolution and prayers.
5. Repeat the successful steps to economic and educational upliftment on a daily basis- perseverance, with intermittent doses of appraisal and reviews to identify what works for you.
6. Start to learn to say NO.... stylishly. When you say No , out of resentment rather than a re-focus, it builds discontent on either side.. but when it's of a new strategic focus, it builds both you and your family.
7. Enjoy this new freedom as you Take charge... It won't be all rosy but you won't feel like a victim!
8. Have a blessed victorious 2024!!

.

Strange... Adas are the ones who give orders and others follow.

alfredilly:
This shouldn't be the fate of a first daughter.

It shouldn't but being the first born in Africa setting can be draining emotionally, psychological and financially ( time is coming that they start asking her for money...)

Wotoporiously speaking

Chai, you dey suffer Sha, my mum is the first daughter too, I see how she takes care of the others and connected them to all the jobs the got today, 247 her line dey blow up on top family matter... The only problem here is you don't have what you're doing, if not them no for see you dey send you errands, just hustle what to do for yourself going forward.

Peace

Funke, as a fellow first daughter your feelings are valid. I hope you get the needed funds to leave that environment and also get the strength to be thoroughly selfish about yourself. I pray you know that being selfish is needed to prioritize yourself and your own life. See you in greatness.

OFunke24:
I feel so tired of being a first daughter. It feels my life is full of running errands and doing things for everyone but myself. I feel like a servant. I don't know who I am or my what I want to do in life. Im at home all day doing nothing but serving others. I feel so sad and tired of it whenever I remember I will still have to do it all again tomorrow not knowing when this will all end.

I see my siblings moving forward in life and I only have a Highschool certificate. My father didnt train me in school and frustrated all my mother's attempts to further my education. Yet all my siblings were put in school. I don't even have the time or mental space to run a business.

I want to leave and be on my own. I want to be able to hear myself. I want to wake up in the morning not thinking of what others will eat or errands that need to be ran. I don't want to think of lunch or dinner or worry about anyone else but myself. I don't even want to hear my name because it is always followed by one request or the other.

This holiday season I kept on thinking about how much I didn't want any family or guests to come visit because it would only mean more work for me. I would be the one living in the kitchen running around like a maid. It makes me feel so ashamed and less than. When people at home remember my running around they then start with the praises "Oh what would we do without you?", "Our second mother." "So hard working, what a strong girl." I don't want any of those praises. They make me feel worse because I don't do any of this by choice. I don't care for compliments for something I have no option but to do. Would any of them still say good things about me if I decided I was tired of living like this, of being at their beck and call? I want to be left alone. Because of these feelings I don't have any desire to have children. The thought of living like this again taking care of children makes me sad and I feel tired at the thought. I feel drained physically, emotionally and mentally. Sometimes I wonder if this is how it feels for all children and if I am just not cut out for this.