Kobojunkie:
I never said he was being deceitful. Rather, I pointed out that he was mistaken.

U ddnt say he was mistaken..u called him a liar point blank from ur first paragraph...u attack pple u don't know because u assume alot...

Kobojunkie:

2. obedience to the same God who said your marriages are of this world and not of His Kingdom of God? Come on!!

He said he believes in God's words...did he mention which word....did he say its Gods words on marriage....
..there are many of God's words and commandments a person can believe and obey that will help them maintain discipline in marriage...Exodus 20 is one one them: the 10 commandment....Jesus teaching on loving our neighbors is another.....if u obey exo 20, u wont cheat on ur wife... its that simple...but u

Kobojunkie:

Even those who don't believe in any god out there can discipline themselves enough to have successful marriages, so don't you think it is a tad ridiculous to pretend the longevity of your marriages is all thanks to your god while theirs somehow isn't?

again u are accusing him of pretending....u are either accusing pple of lying or pretending...people are disciplined for different reasons....some pple's discipline is fueled by their obedience to God's word....take away bible...and some pple will hurt their neighbors, or be vindictive, or covet their neighbors belonging.....if thats too hard for u to understand or believe...then u are the one pretending ...

Kobojunkie:

Couple that with the fact that many within your religious circles who started off reasoning as you do had to abandon that ridiculously along the way when reality hit them like a ton of bricks.

you conclude about pple alot and it's nauseating....u don't know me...and u don't know my religious circle or even if I don't have any....

Kobojunkie:

Yes, the divorce rate among the religious is no where better than that observed among those who don't even subscribe to the idea of a deity. That should be more than enough of a life, but, alas, you can't seem to see what is right before you, can you?

madam all u have here is fallacy.........because some religious person divorced doesnt automatically mean another religious person is lying or pretending that obeying Gods commandments had helped sustained his or her marriage......

Kobojunkie:

3. I can because, unlike you, I can reason beyond the walls that is a religion which many stuff themselves within. There is no god-commandment keeping your libido in check in your marriages. There is self-discipline and that is it.

again.....there are pple whose discipline status is fueled by their obedience to God's commandment or faith driven life style....but ur "I am better than everyone" attitude will not make u think so...

Guy, just choose your buddies rightly. Don't frolic with indisciplined,lying machines, it will be contagious. Keep them afar for your sanity.

Religion has nothing to do with it, are good Christian family home not also failing?Religion has nothing to do with it, are good Christian family home not also failing?...

aamir489:
Religion has nothing to do with it, are good Christian family home not also failing?Religion has nothing to do with it, are good Christian family home not also failing?...

No mind the many religious nutjobs who walk around with blinders on as though that is formula for anything sane. Even there many religious overlords experience in marriage pretty much the same as those outside of religious circles do. Yet they pretend it all somehow does not mean anything except for the delusions in their heads.

Seunpapa65:
It's crazy but marriage no be bean imagine waking up everyday to be seeing the same person for eternity u sef go tire

But your pops work for Ministry for over 35 years...he no tire for the place and you he cater for those.years......?!
You for.kuku.yiremtomenter bus with people.....
You for go build your estate make.only.you live inside......
Find out why LOVE is the most mysterious word in the world and you will give marriage the chance GOD created it for

Seunpapa65:
It's crazy but marriage no be bean imagine waking up everyday to be seeing the same person for eternity u sef go tire

I tire.. The thing nor make sense..
It's like eating only rice for the rest of your life which is not even healthy..

Friends Jesus Christ loves y'all and he want you to accept him as your personal lord and saviour by giving your life to Christ, believing in him and repenting of your sins.remember tomorrow might be too late. Shalom

MAIN REASON IS LOVE OF #MONEY! LOBATAN!CHIKENAN!!

frozen70:


Yes,
But people will still marry and still survive the challenges of marriage

Men cheats and to them is just for fun and they see it as a game

When a woman cheats, she cheats because her emotions are being troubled by probably her man and so may be ♥ broken and wants to be with another man to fill the gap for her

But whatever the reason for cheating is best known to those that cheats

.this is 2024....not 1989....

Women fvck around like men

..Women cheat for fun too....

Afrobasic:


You still dey ask? No be you create topic?

Don't you see how bad modern marriages/women are? I will rather be single for life and enjoy my wealth alone, than to carry one liability in the name of love.

. I really wanna see your reply in 2029, You want loneliness to finish you

thesicilian:

Like everything else, the bad eggs tend to be more visible than the good ones. There's a whole lot of happy, disciplined, committed married couples out there.

It's his friends and neighbors.
He needs to move out that hood and change his click of friends

lordnkem000:

Are you sure there are a lot? Because we don't hear their own stories, atleast to reassure people like myself who still find marriage attractive. TikTok, YouTube and co has reduced marriage to shambles. I don't believe it is because we breed weak men these days. We need couples with blissful marriages to speak up

I am married to one of the most amazing woman on earth, we got married when my salary was 13k 11yrs ago, she took the risk of staying with me for the rest of her life not minding the fact that i may or may not make it..but today Alhamdulilah the story is different.

One of the reasons for failed marriage is fake life, African traditions and men ego.

On this platform last month when I open a thread to hail my wife support, prayers and strength, I was labeled by 3 small boys as SIMP 😂, I laughed coz, they actually don't know who a SIMP is, infact most of them taught I was poor in that thread, unknown to them that people like us don't pretend coz where God places me today was a result of real and not fake life.

Also, go into marriage with intentionality, know what you want from a woman from the onset, set the values you will never compromise or trade for anything, get her to know that, for what ever you are looking for outside she has it and vise versa...

Conclusion: Marriage is sweet, marriage is good, marriage is not a scam...na the human being in that marriage na him/her be scam....when two scammers jam... network go seize...be intentional

Check this tread below
https://www.nairaland.com/8001768/me-appreciate-wife-tough-period

Like everything else, the bad eggs tend to be more visible than the good ones. There's a whole lot of happy, disciplined, committed married couples out there.Like everything else, the bad eggs tend to be more visible than the good ones. There's a whole lot of happy, disciplined, committed married couples out there....

lordnkem000:

I agree
Men cheat for fun and ego, that's why a woman shouldn't be bothered about her man cheating because it means nothing, though i don't advice cheating, but you see women cheating in marriage, wahala dey because you have said it all yourself. I just wish cheating wasn't part of marriage issues.
Thanks a lot for your input

Welcome

advanceDNA:


.this is 2024....not 1989....

Women fvck around like men

..Women cheat for fun too....

In that case, anyone that wants to cheat, let him or her cheat

Its their private life business not ours

I don't know why they are cheating and I don't want to know either

lordnkem000:

Even in recent times we've seen it that women can't handle power. What do we do about it na? Is it wrong to support an ambitious woman if we love them? Abeg o

Lolzzzz!
When you hear some pray they don't want their wives to be richer than they are ... You won't understand until you enter am ... Don't ever pray to be here ... Men that stood with these kind of women are very very very strong mentally ... Bros... If you see people say things they have experienced please avoid it at all cost ... Even if you are a multi millionaire... Bros if you wife hit billions Omo na grace of God ooo remain not to be another child in the house ... Na man Sabi raise women with nothing women no Sabi do am like men ooo ... Support them and expect anything in return or nothing in return ... The best if to always have the financial power as a man in the home ... Nothing really beats this ... Very very very few ... Very few can manage their homes if women has more ... The marriage na cage for the man ooo most times ...

lordnkem000:

Even in recent times we've seen it that women can't handle power. What do we do about it na? Is it wrong to support an ambitious woman if we love them? Abeg o

Support yourself more ... In my own opinion support the 10 to 20 percent,support yourself 90 to 80 percent... If this people turn on your bros you go wan run madt ... They easily change ooo... That's why on matter of infidelity if man cheats most times he it's doesn't really scatter home or cus death to the wife but if woman cheat it's highly dangerous for the man cus she fit poison the man ... I have seen this case before ... It happened to one of my friend's dad... Way men think is different from how women reason ... It's very very different

lordnkem000:

Even in recent times we've seen it that women can't handle power. What do we do about it na? Is it wrong to support an ambitious woman if we love them? Abeg o

If you find a selfless woman ... You find a gem...
There are useless men too ... Some men are fucking useless and very lazy too ...

When we begin to see marriage as your own body u will never get tired..have u ever gotten tired of your own body..why then should u be worried about seeing or having one person in your personal space for the rest of your lives.

3kay945:
Despite the nonsense girls everywhere, I personally still know some few young girls/ladies with proper home training and education.
Very good quality/character for marriage but they might not have the massive packages many young lad looks out for o.

So, bottom line, look well there are still many promising ladies out there.

.

Women are all the same,if she had the massive package she wouldnt have a good character etc..

Its only Old/ugly vvomen that take church matters seriously,where are the young beautiful girls
They are out there flexing,when they hit the wall(old age) they now enter into churches to deceive those church simps..

Women are all the same, if you know a females nature, you can never love females.

3kay945:


Four years still small now.. lol

How many years cime be urs??

lordnkem000:

I wish it was that true or simple

Na true I tell when you marry your friend both of you will look away from each other short coming nobody is complete atleast a friend will be open to each other even during sex and sharing of ideas between each other.

lordnkem000:
I have been observing my married friends, colleagues & even neighbors around and I noticed deep down their marriages were all lacking discipline, they cheat on each other, lie, they pretend and most of them are so miserable.

Funny thing is two of my friends are not even up to 3yrs in marriage and they are so tired. Yesterday I met an old classmate of mine and he told me the girl I saw him with wasn't his wife, just for knacks, that he's been married for 1yr and 9months but he's tired of his marriage. It made me scared because here i am thinking of finding a wife and people in it are wanting out.

So I'm asking, what could be the problem with staying married these days?

People who have been married for 10+ years what is your secret? I'm curious to learn a thing or two

First of all, let me state that I am married, and HAPPILY married.




People in miserable marriages usually marry for the wrong reasons.



You marry for money's sake. We have women who go into marriage believing that money is everything. They get into marriage. The money is there, but they soon realize that other things are needed. They realize they need their husband at home almost 24/7. But the husband is at home only 3 hours because he has to work harder now. And even when he is at home, he doesn't have time to gist with wifey. Wifey starts needing companionship. She never thought that marriage (even with money) can be boring and/or lonely.



You ignore all red flags You have a bossy girlfriend or boyfriend, you ignore the bossiness. You now get married, and they start controlling your life, and within 3-4 weeks of marriage, you are already asking for some freedom to make your own decisions or at least have a say in the house. You start behaving like you are just noticing the red flags. You have a rude boyfriend or girlfriend. They are nasty towards their own parents. They pick fights with their siblings at every opportunity, and they are quick to talk down on shop attendants, clerks, drivers, gatemen, etc. You still go on and marry them, and when they start dragging your parents or siblings like a dilapidated Tiger generator, or they start disgracing you outside with constant public fightings and quarrels, you will start running from pillar to post, looking for advice. Did you not see the red flags?



Getting wooed by ephemeral things Physical attractiveness cannot be overlooked, but there should be other things drawing you to someone that you hope to settle down with. When I met my wife, it was at a school I was applying to. She was my boss because it was she that recommended me for employment after my micro-teaching. I didn't even look at her very much before I fell in love with her. Because she always wore free flowing clothes, I didn't see her curves until much later when I had fallen completely for her. We started as colleagues and then friends and then close friends. What drew me to her was her empathy, something which is still evident till this day. Another thing is her motherliness. She was motherly to me, without being controlling. In fact, I would put her empathy and motherliness together because it is her empathy that makes her motherly. And the best of all that made me decide that she must be mine and mine alone is the fact that we have almost everything in common from religious views to even likes and dislikes. And she is someone you can trust to get the home running smoothly even if you are away for several days or weeks. She has a way with children, having worked as teacher and administrator in several schools. She had even headed a nursery school before. Her experience helped us as a family when we started having children.




I would like to say that it is important to know what you want in a woman or man. Many people are confused and would jump at any man or woman that seems ready. Being ready for marriage is not that easy to say. You may have the money to raise 100 children as a man, and yet be immature to keep a home.





My wife and I have the same principles on spending and every month, we sit together to draw our monthly budgets. Our contribution to our household budget is 60-40, but this is not strictly followed. Sometimes, she contributes more than I do, and sometimes, it is 50-50. We have had this going on even before we married, which is why courtship is very important for a lasting marriage.






This is not to say that my own strategy would work for everyone else. Every marriage is unique, but I believe that if people take their time more and look beyond ephemeral things, they would enjoy their marriages.

Anunakeeh:


Thank you Bimpe for having the courage to say the Truth. Your types are really scarce nowadays.

Some people are still being delusional by telling Lies to themselves thinking they are deceiving other people.

What we have everywhere now is deception, lies and all form of vices.

You are welcome Anunakeeh.

Nyascobar1414:
.

Women are all the same,if she had the massive package she wouldnt have a good character etc..

Its only Old/ugly vvomen that take church matters seriously,where are the young beautiful girls
They are out there flexing,when they hit the wall(old age) they now enter into churches to deceive those church simps..

Women are all the same, if you know a females nature, you can never love females.

Well, women may share similar attitudes or characters but not all women are bad.
Yea, the package also have input in how their characters were mould.

aremubabs:





First of all, let me state that I am married, and HAPPILY married.




People in miserable marriages usually marry for the wrong reasons.



You marry for money's sake. We have women who go into marriage believing that money is everything. They get into marriage. The money is there, but they soon realize that other things are needed. They realize they need their husband at home almost 24/7. But the husband is at home only 3 hours because he has to work harder now. And even when he is at home, he doesn't have time to gist with wifey. Wifey starts needing companionship. She never thought that marriage (even with money) can be boring and/or lonely.



You ignore all red flags You have a bossy girlfriend or boyfriend, you ignore the bossiness. You now get married, and they start controlling your life, and within 3-4 weeks of marriage, you are already asking for some freedom to make your own decisions or at least have a say in the house. You start behaving like you are just noticing the red flags. You have a rude boyfriend or girlfriend. They are nasty towards their own parents. They pick fights with their siblings at every opportunity, and they are quick to talk down on shop attendants, clerks, drivers, gatemen, etc. You still go on and marry them, and when they start dragging your parents or siblings like a dilapidated Tiger generator, or they start disgracing you outside with constant public fightings and quarrels, you will start running from pillar to post, looking for advice. Did you not see the red flags?



Getting wooed by ephemeral things Physical attractiveness cannot be overlooked, but there should be other things drawing you to someone that you hope to settle down with. When I met my wife, it was at a school I was applying to. She was my boss because it was she that recommended me for employment after my micro-teaching. I didn't even look at her very much before I fell in love with her. Because she always wore free flowing clothes, I didn't see her curves until much later when I had fallen completely for her. We started as colleagues and then friends and then close friends. What drew me to her was her empathy, something which is still evident till this day. Another thing is her motherliness. She was motherly to me, without being controlling. In fact, I would put her empathy and motherliness together because it is her empathy that makes her motherly. And the best of all that made me decide that she must be mine and mine alone is the fact that we have almost everything in common from religious views to even likes and dislikes. And she is someone you can trust to get the home running smoothly even if you are away for several days or weeks. She has a way with children, having worked as teacher and administrator in several schools. She had even headed a nursery school before. Her experience helped us as a family when we started having children.




I would like to say that it is important to know what you want in a woman or man. Many people are confused and would jump at any man or woman that seems ready. Being ready for marriage is not that easy to say. You may have the money to raise 100 children as a man, and yet be immature to keep a home.





My wife and I have the same principles on spending and every month, we sit together to draw our monthly budgets. Our contribution to our household budget is 60-40, but this is not strictly followed. Sometimes, she contributes more than I do, and sometimes, it is 50-50. We have had this going on even before we married, which is why courtship is very important for a lasting marriage.






This is not to say that my own strategy would work for everyone else. Every marriage is unique, but I believe that if people take their time more and look beyond ephemeral things, they would enjoy their marriages.

Thank you so much sir, you are so wonderful. You don't know how much I've learned from your generous comment. God bless you

Fearurcreeator:

If you find a selfless woman ... You find a gem...
There are useless men too ... Some men are fucking useless and very lazy too ...

I agree

Fearurcreeator:

Support yourself more ... In my own opinion support the 10 to 20 percent,support yourself 90 to 80 percent... If this people turn on your bros you go wan run madt ... They easily change ooo... That's why on matter of infidelity if man cheats most times he it's doesn't really scatter home or cus death to the wife but if woman cheat it's highly dangerous for the man cus she fit poison the man ... I have seen this case before ... It happened to one of my friend's dad... Way men think is different from how women reason ... It's very very different

I agree. So much lies on the hands of the woman for marriage to work

OZIOGU1:


I am married to one of the most amazing woman on earth, we got married when my salary was 13k 11yrs ago, she took the risk of staying with me for the rest of her life not minding the fact that i may or may not make it..but today Alhamdulilah the story is different.

One of the reasons for failed marriage is fake life, African traditions and men ego.

On this platform last month when I open a thread to hail my wife support, prayers and strength, I was labeled by 3 small boys as SIMP 😂, I laughed coz, they actually don't know who a SIMP is, infact most of them taught I was poor in that thread, unknown to them that people like us don't pretend coz where God places me today was a result of real and not fake life.

Also, go into marriage with intentionality, know what you want from a woman from the onset, set the values you will never compromise or trade for anything, get her to know that, for what ever you are looking for outside she has it and vise versa...

Conclusion: Marriage is sweet, marriage is good, marriage is not a scam...na the human being in that marriage na him/her be scam....when two scammers jam... network go seize...be intentional

Check this tread below
https://www.nairaland.com/8001768/me-appreciate-wife-tough-period

Thanks sir I appreciate your post. I didn't see that your thread, I really will look for it.
Our boys here are so quick to call others SIMP because of ignorance I guess. The reason i don't pay attention to their red pill, though some of the points are correct

Dandy1:


Nothing like weak men bro. Even if you loyal and dey responsible pass the pope, that funny gender go still do you dirty and turn around to blame you as the cause. They are unstable beings. Working marriages you see are surviving on sacrifices and compromises just to make things work.

I think i partially agree especially on the last part of your comment

Fryx:


I get you. I use to say it that I am not married yet though.

However, I have always been entangled with women. Both nice ones, snd strict ones. In fact, even the ones that guys struggle to woo, they usually develop soft spot for me. I think they mistook me for an easy man to control.

But, regardless, I do take charge once we get closer. But by then, they would have been too taken by their feelings to keep up putting on their guard and high standards.

Apart from the feelings. What works best is “know what you are doing as a man”. Have a clear vision for yourself and any woman in your life (friend or lover) and they will naturally submit to you.

Just be a leader. They will follow. They are meant to follow.

But being a leader also means you have great responsibility. They look up to you and emulate you. It’s dangerous to betray a woman or take them for granted. Even if you want to hurt them, take their permission and make it seem sweet. They love sweet pain.

Just make any pain you are causing them a sweet pain. They wont know when they will start agreeing to you. Also, make every decision you made look like they are the one making the decision. It gives them a sense of belonging.


And it’s true that replacing a woman is not always easy. Marriage is like a covenant plus if you love her, it became harder.

I think, the most important thing is focusing energy on developing mental strength. With a good mental strength, you can take any hard decision.

A girl once use her diabolical power to tie me down (she is an ogbanje). But once I discovered it’s not normal. I made it my next step to break free.

Do you know how I succeed? I found a girl that’s also spiritual. Ever since I met my new girl, every influence the former one had on me stopped. And I saw what transpired in a dream.

My new girl is more respectful. More reasonable and not as bitter as my previous one. Although, the both of them are still close to me.

I don’t hate my old girl. But, I don’t have control over her because of what she did to me. I won’t mind whatever she does if she is reasonable. But she is far from being reasonable. I have that control now, having broken free.

You are so correct sir, gosh am so happy for comments from people like you, it shows we still have responsible and good people here. Thanks