Many couples today are more interested in birthing and breeding children than raising them. Commonplace is assumption that a child's needs ranges from physiological (food, shelter, medical access, clothing), spiritual (religion) to educational (sponsored enrollment in school) dimensions. Positioning children towards self-awareness and teaching them complementary timeless values are either neglected or delegated. Are you on this table?

Ignorance and "I am so busy with work" excuse underpin this trend. Parents who didn't discuss how to raise their children at length during courting or lack pragmatic family information are a danger to society. Copying what previous couples did and present couples do are inevitable. Convention doesn't logically imply correctness. Some parents let chance dictate. They use positive affirmations to mask their vacuity. Also, some parents justify their long absence in nurturing their kids' minds with making money for family wellbeing. Maids and relatives, clueless about details of a husband and wife's marital vision, take over. Sole reliance on school teachers oozes parental irresponsibility. These tendencies harvest low-self-esteemed, non-visionary, mediocre, immoral, and deviant children. The bully and bullied girl in that recent Abuja British secondary school viral video stir parental questions.

In fact, as a potential and actual dad or mum, onus is on you to raise (not breed) your children to become aware of themselves in order to develop unique identities that endure and enhance humanity. But you can't do this from a place of scanty or zero knowledge. First, reevaluate interactions with your child so far, talk to him or her on distinctness as a human person, define corresponding values to imbibe, and reiterate them daily. Researches in psychology reveal it is best to shape children when young--I recommend from first year. It is more difficult with adults but not impossible. Second, readjust your work schedule. Commit now to spending at least one quality hour with your talking child daily. Listen to the naive questions, comments and use most as avenues to enlighten him or her on becoming assets. Take over from their nannies after you return. There is time. In the words of Carthaginian conqueror Hannibal, "There is always a way. If there is none, I will create one."

However, my position could be accused of indoctrination and underestimation of family tradition. These indicate misunderstanding. Enabling a child attain personal identity conditions him or her to think for himself or herself by rejecting dangerous conformity and modifying learned ideologies upwardly. Consciousness that family tradition is open to revision reflects a child on the road to exceptional. Don't breed your children, raise them.


©Kelechi O. Naze (KON)

cc: mynd44, oam4j, lalasticlala, seun, nlfpmod, fergie001.

Drop in holistic parental responsibility towards children in Nigeria warranted the post above. Kindly take a step to turn this tide by forwarding it to front page. Thank you.

We monitor ours....secondly you're not far from the truth.

Thank you so much Kaycee. You couldn't have said it any better. I gave similar admonition to parents on the thread of senate respose to the university age saga.
Before you get into reproduction you must know that you are getting into a minimum 20 year project. If you are not willing to put in the necessary work in the nurturing and upbringing of a child, it is better not to reproduce, it is not compulsory to reproduce, after all, human beings are not endangered species.
Every couple must aim at bringing forth offsprings who are at least a step ahead of them, not in terms of education or wealth, rather in terms of being a higher evolved life, with a better self awareness and superior consciousness.

You have said nothing but a faint truth .

Well we will adjust to new trends of the society