You'll most likely settle in faster as a married woman than your husband.

Especially if he married you before he was 30 and almost all his close friends are still bachelors.

In the early stages of your marriage, you'll feel like you made a mistake. Your husband would find it harder to come to terms with his new status.

He still would want to live like he used to.

Go out to hang out with friends, club, chill in the bars, and sometimes, even flirt with other ladies.

If you got pregnant within the first year of your marriage, it may make it worse.

He won't be able to take you out at night like both of you used to do before you got married.

He's also new to the life of living with a pregnant woman.

He doesn't understand how to deal with your emotions, cravings, attention, and nagging.

Sometimes, he will feel choked.

He may even withdraw from sex because he may have the orientation that he may hurt the baby in your womb.

Both of you would "fight" a lot of the time and curse each other.

All these should not make you think of calling it quit.

Especially if you're convinced that you earned your place as his wife.

And that you did not manipulate him into marrying you & he didn't marry you out of pity or because you got pregnant.

Young married men need some time & patience.

Yes you can complain but don't allow your emotions to have the best of you.

During these early stages, if you want to complain to anyone, please do not complain to your mother.

Discuss these issues with his elder brothers, father, or your father.

Your mother will use emotions to advise you because you're her daughter.

If care is not taken, your mother may give you the wrong advice and introduce friction in your nascent marriage.

Your father would understand and teach you to be patient.

His father & elder brothers would call him to order.

The moment you give birth, that is when you'll notice the first A major change in your husband.

The birth of your child will be one of his happiest moments.

You'll notice that he will reduce his outings and want to be closer to his child and you.

He may drift away sometimes but it's a process.

As both of you keep waxing together, he would start amending his ways.

A few years down the line, his close friends too would have gotten married.

They too would start minding their families & reduce their hangouts.

This is why I keep telling you all that the first 5 years of your marriage would be tough.

Once you cross this milestone, you would have achieved a lot.

The quarrels would reduce, & the nagging would reduce.

You the wife have a lot on your hands to be worrying about petty things.

Your husband would be thinking of bills to pay and if he's a serious-minded husband and father, no one would have to remind him that he's now a married man.

Patience is a virtue.

It doesn't matter for how long you dated, marriage would humble you.

So to help you through these early stages, please avoid toxic friends.

Almost every married woman went through that stage.

Don't paint your husband as a "devil" and don't ever compare him with your friends' husbands.

You must build your matrimonial home while your husband leads it.

He would make a lot of mistakes but with time he would change and be a better man, father, and husband.

It's not a time for you to start comparing him with your ex.

It's not a time for you to start finding comfort in the hands of your ex.

It's not a time for you to start chatting with your ex and telling him that you regret marrying your husband.

It's not a time for you to say because your husband may be cheating, then you would cheat back.

If he catches you, no one will listen to you.

You would have ruined your marriage and you would have made him worse.

And to young married men

There is time for everything.

Once you're married, learn that your wife deserves attention.

Control your anger and do not flare up at everything.

Mind how you use your "privileges".

It's not for you to be rubbing them on the face of your wife.

And making statements like "I was like this before you married me" means you do not rate the words or advice of your young wife.

Mind what you tell your bachelor friends about your wife.

Some of your male friends are even envious that you're married and they're not.

Do not let them push you to maltreat your wife at home.

If you're hanging out with them and your wife calls, pick up the call.

Even if you're with a lady.

You're married and you should not be ashamed of it or hide it from any lady out there.

Sometimes if your wife says "Please come home".

Leave whatever you're doing and go home to be with her.

Your friends do not have anyone to go home to.

You do.

And that home is your safest abode.

The amount of temptation you'll receive as a young married man will be more.

And if you're not careful, you may make terrible mistakes that may cost you a lot.

There is nothing outside.

End.