^^^
Yeah, I shouldn't over-generalize and there are always exceptions to a rule.
But you can see that a good number agreed with the analogy. Maybe you're reacting because you're not like that. But if you were to look at things objectively, you'd see that it's quite true. Maybe not about all, but about a good number!

*dhtml:

^^^I think the problem here is breaking the ice. Well, i dont believe Nigerian guys are different from other guys. I found the post somewhat discriminatory too, but i just wanted to let things flow. Maybe the poster has a point sha.

Please, no vex. I meant no harm with my post. I was just trying to gage the male perspective on this

Mrs, Chima:

Now that you explained further and if you really want to make it work GO TO HIM.  Mynd is right do not spend any more time APART from your man.  Men period can't be away from their loved women for a long period time and often times think you are not interested so he will start to cause "wahala" and then it would be harder for you guys to communicate.  

I know it should be the man that make the first move but this is a new era, make that move girl and get your man before SOMEBODY ELSE DO.

I appreciate the support.

Mynd_44:

well hope all the advice works out for you

Thank you so much! I'm taking it all in. I'm just trying to see how I will go about it. I never really thought I'd the type to be on a forum baring my heart to people for advice

Blackteeth:

Honestly there is nothing to advice here. The OP should know what to do by instinct. Lets move to a head cracking issue please.

Yes, I did say that I know what to do. I just wanted the opinions and views of some men, that's all. I know which path to take, all I wanted was to know how to get there. It's not that I'm looking for everyone to solve my problem. My heart has already co-signed on solving the problem. Mending things was never an issue for me. It may not be a head cracking issue for you but it definitely is one for me and perhaps anyone else who may be in the same position.

break what sort of break its either we r in or out in essence if i were to be your guy i will prefer to settle whatsoever disagreement we have sooner because if any sort of break comes in girl it means am done with you.

Russialane:

break what sort of break its either we r in or out in essence if i were to be your guy i will prefer to settle whatsoever disagreement we have sooner because if any sort of break comes in girl it means am done with you.

Ahem!

Russialane:

break what sort of break its either we r in or out in essence if i were to be your guy i will prefer to settle whatsoever disagreement we have sooner because if any sort of break comes in girl it means am done with you.

Sorry that reminded me of break time in primary school

@lola.luv
WHAT is[b] Ahem[/b] or you r being sarcastic meaning Amen

I just cleared my throat to call someone's attention to your post. Cause I said earlier that our guys don't fancy going on relationship breaks. . .

It is best you settle it quickly if you value the guy especially if you were the one that wronged him. Even if you are not the wrong try settle with him, or else you might lose him.

@inkie, most guys don't like this type of topic, they prefer the oko ati obo topics. But the poster spoke well is why some even responded sef.

lola.luv:

I just cleared my throat to call someone's attention to your post. Cause I said earlier that our guys don't fancy going on relationship breaks. . .

So I've noticed

*dhtml:

It is best you settle it quickly if you value the guy especially if you were the one that wronged him. Even if you are not the wrong try settle with him, or else you might lose him.

@inkie, most guys don't like this type of topic, they prefer the oko ati obo topics. But the poster spoke well is why some even responded sef.

Why?

let me help you all out the dude means most guys prefer the D, I, C, K and the P, U, S, S, Y TOPICS , oko ati obo let him speak for himself not every guy is a pervert,

Russialane:

let me help you all out the dude means most guys prefer the D, I, C, K and the P, U, S, S, Y TOPICS , oko ati obo let him speak for himself not every guy is a pervert,

Oh I see. I don't think most guys here are like that. Some of them seem like they genuinely care at times

Caramba! La senorita de mehico nuevo, interesante. . .
That is the explanation I can give why male reaponses are not much. If it were those threads, u woul  ave seen so many pages of responses at the moment. Of course, not every guy is like that na. Just sayin my opinion. If you look at a more elstupido thread in sexuality - in luv making, who enjoys most. U can see really elaborate responses from guys only - now how do you explain that?

Anyway la poster, espero you ave found.a favorable answer?

Well since you have gotten the advice you need, can the derailling please start? This thread is a wee bit too peaceful

@poster

I think you should try to work out things with your ex. You know, sometimes people would think that the grass is always greener on the other side. Some of your girl friends, who might even be jealous of your relationship, might be telling you to "forget about the loser , baby you deserve better"   . .  You have to  avoid the slippery banana peel that would potentially lead you to jumping from one relationship to another, from one heart break to another. .  

Let me end with this proverb: If the mountain will not come to mahomet, mahomet must go to the mountain.

Goodluck!!

BTW, are both of you Nigerian??

Donde es our poster?
Aye, the thread derailers are ready to start their work. . . .I prefer that part, this peacefulness does not make me too happy.

Dating one nigerian man does not mean you're dating all nigerian men.

Why do people keep opening these d.aft threads?

If more men havent responded its not because s.ex wasnt mentioned but because they dont know you from adam but you're calling them as if they do.

Jeez.

Of course i assume the poster is simply trying to drive traffic or might actually be one of those multiple ids.

#Topic,

For me, the "appropriate" time apart should depend on;
- the issue at hand,
- the guy in question and
- your very self, poster.

If you want him back so bad, why not call him? Sure he feels the same about you? Because it seems like you're the only one trying so hard to make it work. Oh well.

I for one think that giving of space is a mind trick. You no longer want to deal with the issues concerning your relationship yet you don't want to say you are no longer dating, a silly step if you ask me.

Stay together and thrash out your issues or leave and get it over with. If a girl asks me for a break I'll tell her if you want a break fine but I don't accept it as a solution. What will you do in the time apart? You ain't living together so what do you need further "space" for?

As far as I know guys this side of the world don't really do the "space" thing. The mind trick is that they are preparing to jump ship but still give you the impression that they want you. A big TRICK!

The OP should see me in my room for a private advice session. But the time we finish nacking akpako inspiration go come sharp sharp

*dhtml:

Donde es our poster?
Aye, the thread derailers are ready to start their work. . . .I prefer that part, this peacefulness does not make me too happy.

Who cares if you are happy or not?

Metalgoong:

@poster

I think you should try to work out things with your ex. You know, sometimes people would think that the grass is always greener on the other side. Some of your girl friends, who might even be jealous of your relationship, might be telling you to "forget about the loser , baby you deserve better"   . .  You have to  avoid the slippery banana peel that would potentially lead you to jumping from one relationship to another, from one heart break to another. .  

Let me end with this proverb: If the mountain will not come to mahomet, mahomet must go to the mountain.

Goodluck!!

BTW, are both of you Nigerian??

Don't worry I didn't have any girlfriends talking in my ear or telling to leave him. And yes, we're both Nigerian.

*dhtml:

Donde es our poster?
Aye, the thread derailers are ready to start their work. . . .I prefer that part, this peacefulness does not make me too happy.

tpia@:

Dating one nigerian men does not mean you're dating all nigerian men.

Why do people keep opening these d.aft threads?

If more men havent responded its not because s.ex wasnt mentioned but because they dont know you from adam but you're calling them as if they do.

Jeez.

tpia@:

Of course i assume the poster is simply trying to drive traffic or might actually be one of those multiple ids.

How about you do me a major favor and keep your mouth shut. I may not post on this site frequently but I have certainly observed the nasty manner that you reply to people. You are very vile and full of nothing but negativity. If you honestly have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING positive to contribute then please take your poison spewing ways elsewhere. I don't know the kind of hated or evil that is a part of your life and I don't care to know but I don't need any of it. Didn't your mother ever teach you that if you don't have anything good to say then you shouldn't say anything at all?? Did you even have an positive figure in your life to teach you that? If not, then now you know. I know I cannot stop your vile comments on this thread but I certainly won't sit around and tolerate it!

Orton1_0:

#Topic,

For me, the "appropriate" time apart should depend on;
- the issue at hand,
- the guy in question and
- your very self, poster.

If you want him back so bad, why not call him? Sure he feels the same about you? Because it seems like you're the only one trying so hard to make it work. Oh well. 

I will give him a call pretty soon. Either that or I'll ask him to meet up with me so we can talk face to face. And yes, I'm sure he feels the same.

Lord_Reed:

I for one think that giving of space is a mind trick. You no longer want to deal with the issues concerning your relationship yet you don't want to say you are no longer dating, a silly step if you ask me.

Stay together and thrash out your issues or leave and get it over with. If a girl asks me for a break I'll tell her if you want a break fine but I don't accept it as a solution. What will you do in the time apart? You ain't living together so what do you need further "space" for?

As far as I know guys this side of the world don't really do the "space" thing. The mind trick is that they are preparing to jump ship but still give you the impression that they want you. A big TRICK!

I'm not one to play mind tricks. That's not a part of who I am

Mynd_44:

The OP should see me in my room for a private advice session. But the time we finish nacking akpako inspiration go come sharp sharp

Chineke! I said I wanted my boyfriend back, not that I was looking to replace him

^^^
Don't worry by the time we finish, you will know what to do to have him back

jobless poster


keep asking senselessly for unnecessary advice.

like we dont know you're busy fishing for more nigerian men to sink your claws in.

na today your type dey internet?


idi ti yun e tan abi.


anyway, i'm sure you're well experienced in servicing multiple men, no matter how many, within short periods of time.

are you female by dna or female by choice?

not that it matters!!!!

no be me you dey look for!!!

'how
much time do you think is
appropriate for you and your
girlfriend to stay apart before
either of you decide to get
together and work things out?'

@OP
As soon as either of u is ready, dear.

@op, I was lookin at your profile, thought u might understand spanish, I was writin very very basic spanish. Never mind

@tpia, o da bi pe oko awon okunrin ibile wa ni o fe do jare.

To be sincere, I stil don't know the purpose of this thread. . .it has neither head nor tale. Who wrong who? Why the separation? Too many questions, but I don't really care. . .nunca

@OP
Glad you don't do tricks however I say forget about requesting for time out. Talk your issues out and get it over with instead of allowing it to divide you.

Probably too late now but I'll give my own 50c anyways

In my opinion, most naija guys are not so keen on taking breaks. Of course there is the ocassional fights where you both don't talk to each other for a while and then you make up. Apart from those, most wouldn't sit down and say they want to take a break. In my experience, when a naija guy says he wants to take a break, what he really means is - he doesn't want the relationship anymore but he either doesn't want to break your heart or he wants to leave room for shagging later when if things don't work out with the new flings he was looking into. Hell, most will even go for the new fling without bothering breaking up with you.

But if you must take a break in a relationship, be sure to sit down and discuss the full terms of the break such as:
1. Is it a break or a break up?
2. If it is a break, how long is the break?
3. Are we allowed to see anyone else during the break?
4. Hell, are we allowed to sleep with anyone else during the break?
5. What is the purpose or what do you plan to achieve with the break?
6. What next after the break? Do we automatically continue or do we sit down after the break to consider if we continue or not?
7. And for the FB savvy ones, should we change our fb status to single, complicated etc?

That should always be defined during a break. So no one gets angry or jealous (no guarantees anyways) when smth happens during the break or the break is really a break up.
I think by now you should hv made up with your boo or esle you are courting with danger.

Good luck